Phillip Schofield (5)

 

I have concluded that Philip Schofield is a class A cunt of the highest order.

Not because he lied to his wife for 27 years while having probably multiple gay affairs behind her back, no but because he is an unscrupulous git with no morals or honor. What class of shitbird conducts business on another companies premises?

In the latest “webuyanycar” advert we see a car sales man about to close a deal on a car sale when up pops the little Schofield on the buyer’s shoulder to sell his services in the showroom of another business.

Right at the moment the sales guy was about to make a sale, a sale that would have earnt him a commission, money he could have used to buy food for his family, shoes for little Timmy, and maybe finally pay for his old mums long-awaited a hip transplant.

But No, fucking Schofield manages to find the time in his busy schedule of morning light entertainment and bumming men to swoop in like the shit bird that he is and ruin another man’s livelihood.

It is a shame the sales guy did not reach over, pluck the little shit off the customer’s shoulder, and twist his head off saying, “Sorry, there was some annoying little turd on you, but now it is gone”

Schofield, for conducting business on another mans property uninvited, you are a cunt of the highest order. Fucking cunt.

Nominated by: Spherical:Cunt 

61 thoughts on “Phillip Schofield (5)

  1. I think his wife has some shagging to do, to make up for all the disinterest from this shirtlifting queer.

    • Good nom, agreed!
      If he can lie and cheat on his missus he can lie to me!
      No way id buy a car of this skipping little ducky darling.
      As said no honour, and hes probably had the gearstick up his harris.

      • When I first saw this ad I was reminded of a film from the mid 80’s and I can’t for the life of me remember the name.

        But there’s a teenage lad presented with a pissed up fit as fuck bird on the bed

        On one shoulder is his inner devil who says ‘go on, suck her tits, squeeze her bum you know that’s what she wants’.

        On the other shoulder is his inner angel and I have no fucking idea what that said.

        Phylis I’m sure would have taken the tight brown as apposed the easy pink.

      • Yes it is National Lampoon’s Animal House, the original & best, an absolute classic.

        The angel & devil on Tom Hulces shoulders while he debates whether or not to shag his drunken, passed out date ;
        Angel : “If you molest that sweet innocent girl, you’ll never forgive yourself”
        Devil : ” Fuck her. Fuck her brains out. You know she wants it”

        Sadly, they will never be allowed to make movies like this anymore 🙁

  2. He really is a prize prat, the male version of the advertising tart that is carol vorderman. Who would trust either of these avaricious clowns who would endorse any product as long as they get fistful’s of dollars?

    They ought to set up their own PR Agency:

    wesellanythingifwearepaid enough.com

    In fact, virtually all celebs who lend their image to any commercial campaign are cunts.

  3. Beyond my usual crazed hyperbole, Philip Schofield genuinely remains one of only three people of whom I truly wish was dead.

    • Schofield has been at the top of my ‘Utter Cunts’ list for some time.
      I remain amazed that my TV is still in working order, as I have an overwhelming desire to fling something at this bastards face every time he appears (which is far too often).

      It’s not only that he’s a self important, lying, attention seeking, shit-stabbing bastard – but that he’s such a smug, grinning, cock faced cunt, that makes me want to push his mouth through the back of his head & into the next street.

      Aaaaaaarrgghhh ! He’s so fucking annoying !

      • Totally agree, I’ve always thought he was an irritating little cunt but since the cheating shit stabber has announced his poofery the twat has surpassed his earlier years of cuntery to the point where he’s blown the cuntometer sky high.

  4. His wife said she realised that something wasn’t quite right with their relationship the night she suggested that they try anal and they both rolled over….

  5. Can you imagine the fucking uproar if he’d announced that he’d been shagging a young bird for years? He’d be lucky to have his smarmy trap on the gogglebox ever again. Because he’s packing fudge everything is ok then and the hideous media want pat him on the back and say it’s all ok. I feel for his wife and kids, he’s a true first rate cunt alright.

    • Fucking right. I managed to accidentally turn on a programme he was presenting and his co presenters were giving him a standing ovation for “being brave” and coming out.

      His wife and kids should get the standing ovation and he should be kicked hard in the bollocks by Ronaldo.

    • Given his increasingly vengeful and angry estranged wife and the size of the divorce bill to come Pink Phil will need every penny made from his greedy grubbing.
      Enjoy, cunt.
      And if things get hard financially dye your hair and wiggle your wrecked arse around outside the House of Commons – I am sure cokehead Vaz and a few hundred others will have some taxpayers money to pay for your services.
      Don’t mind the fact he is gay – I care about the fact he is a lying amoral piece of human sewage.

  6. This cunt needs inviting to a Barrymoore pool party for a asphyxiation inducing arse wrecking gang rape followed by somebody finding his floating body and concluding misadventure.

    • Hes not all bad!
      He was once in the toilets at Granada studios and offered me a hot dog through a hole in the cubical wall.
      Thought that was nice of him.

      • MNC Funny as 🤣 he needs the same ‘I’m gonna get all dirty on his ass’ treatment as Marcellas Wallace.

        Ok Schofield were going to shove you back in that closet you came from fully gimped up and we’ve invited your soon to be ex wife the pleasure of shoving this baseball bat as far up your rectum as she can….we know you like an audience you needn’t worry there’s plenty of people that want to see this think of It less this is your life more this was your wife you snaky cunt.

        Not keen on Schofield as it goes 🤣

  7. Webuyanycars is a total racket. Needed to get rid of mine, those cunts offered half of what I got in PX and that if it was in perfect condition. Thieving fucking cunts no wonder they can afford all these adverts.

    • I contacted ‘Webuyanycars’ once, just out of curiosity when selling a car.
      They offered me £500 & I told them to get fucked.
      I sold it via classifieds for £1400.

      Robbing bastards. Offer punters a fair deal & don’t pay cock face £thousands for a shit advert

  8. The little poof sounds more and more camp every day. He now sounds like a mincing queen of Alan Carr proportions, camp, limp-wristed, suggestive. There is a cure – send him to the caning room for a good thrashing.

  9. Schofield will go to hell. He needs to repent, and mend his ways. Our Lord made the bum hole as a one way traffic for the expulsion of the whoopsie. It was always designated one way and with no entry.
    Read the Roles Schofield

  10. I think this is the only time when this eunuch sounding 58 year old manboy with a mouth that looks like it was carved out with a Stanley knife is actually welcome to stick his oar in, not that I have anything against car salesmen as long as they don’t approach me as soon as I enter the forecourt with a cheesy smile, offer me a cup of coffee from the machine and say “I’ll just get the keys for you sir”, try convincing me to buy a car that is the wrong colour, wrong size and a fucking diesel. Try to convince me that I need finance when I’ve said no five times. Hard sell me paint protection that is impossible to authenticate. Tell me that if the car is stolen, smashed up and torched I would need his special gap insurance in order to “get the full market value back”,and other insurances for paint damage and tyre damage that I don’t fucking need or will ever need. Cunts.

    Schofie, stick to the WBAC ads, but piss off trying to get a foot in every other orifice and get back to Tracy island you plastic puppet looking cunt.

  11. Bloody man was serving shitty dick to his wife for years. No fucking honour at all. Disgusting pervert. I cannot believe how he got away with his “hobby” without his wife finding out If I had done something like that to my wife what was left of me would have been pulled out the Witham 1/2 hour after I told her that puddle jumping was my new forte. Bet schofield ‘s taken the knee a few times.

  12. This arsehole acrobat deserves a thorough cunting, even if just for having a voice that sounds more everyday like that other rectum-derricker, Alan Carr.

    Both of the cunts, in turn, speak like Hartley Hare from Pipkins. I had my suspicions about him too.

    Great big fucking whelk.

  13. You’d think that once he was exposed as a Homosexual that he’d have had the grace to retire from public life….but no,the incorrigible and habitual anus-invader continues to thrust his rather dubious charms in our faces,,,,well,BBC, if I had bought a t.v. licence I’d be cancelling it…no way that I’ll subsidise the lifestyle of this typically conniving Fruity Gentleman.

    The man and his ilk are a threat to the moral fabric of our Country…and they’re all Mental,apparently.

    @BringBackKrav…..and where the fuck is Lord Benny?,,,I saw a post from him recently but he appears to have disappeared down some foxhole again.

    • Afternoon Fiddler.

      Strange that this devious fudge nudger deceived his wife for 27 years but came as no surprise to the public. What did she see when he was mincing on about women’s fashion, what’s going on in the soaps or getting teary-eyed about some cunts sob story on the This Morning sofa?

      • Afternoon,LL

        She must have known…she did his laundry… must have noticed in his y-fronts that the skid-marks were on the front and gerbil whiskers glued to the back.

  14. I don’t care where he chooses to shove his shrivelled little pee pee, the irritating ponce can fuck off. Stat.

    • He had dark hair like the jew bird Claudius winklepicker on the next nom.
      But soon as he put his hand down a ladys underpants…pow!
      His hair went white overnight.
      He aged 40yrs overnight.
      Trauma of not finding a 8inch nudger down there.

      • Gordon the Gopher is now in a home for retired TV puppets along with Sooty and Sweep, Orville and Emu, trying to forget the 1990’s.

      • Oh and emus there with him nah it aint that bad ive been here sges!ever since that dozy cunt fell of his own ladder ive been on my arse

    • I’m amazed that Fiddler hasn’t made any references to all that time Phillip spent with Gordon the Gopher back in the 80s, given Fiddler’s extensive knowledge of the practise of gerbiling.

      • I’m not one for smutty innuendo,Mr.Steptoe. I’m sure that when Philip came out of the (broom) closet Gaped- Gordon felt quite empty inside.

      • Of course not Richard, perish the thought.
        Phillip came out of the closet in more ways than one I suppose you could say.

        Although Gordon may have felt empty inside, I’m sure Phillip didn’t. I imagine poor Gordon had to undergo a deep clean afterwards and was crying to himself sitting on the floor in the shower, with the music from The Crying Game playing in the background.

      • Soo got on my tits. Such a goody two shoes. Always telling on Sweep to ‘Mr Corbett’. What a bitch.

  15. I wonder if he turned Gordon The Gopher? By the way, I could never be a turd burglar. I couldn’t stand having blokes turn me down as well as women.

  16. Although I think Schofield is an Olympian level cunt, I Do not cunt him for selling cars.
    Let me expand on this: car salesman, particularly used car salesmen, are the biggest cunts on earth-pondlife equalled only by solicitors and estate agents.

    Most crawled from the primordial sludge and evolved.
    The above counts are still there, stinking, slippery, diseased.
    Like Schofields anus.
    Cunt

  17. Not knowing this cunt from a hole in the ground I was forced to discover from Wikipedia that he is a patron of “Shooting Star Children’s Hospices”

    I am all in favour of shooting star children (or their sleb parents), but I cannot endorse providing hospices for the survivors.

    The man is obviously a cunt, and it would have been less painful just to believe the nom.

  18. This slimy, crude oil driller needs all the money he can lay his hands on right now.
    Apparently ‘loafer lightener’ ain’t cheap.

  19. Everyone has always known this cunt is an arsebandit, he was fooling nobody except his wife and children. Sometimes you can’t see what’s right under your nose and you tend to dismiss what, to others, might be the obvious signs. Just look at Prince Sparkletits.
    This cunt has always reminded of bastards like Ted Teeth and Lord Handleyourbum……such obvious creepy sexual predators. I don’t watch breakfast tv but if I saw him on the telly near any young boys it would make me very uneasy.
    I hope his wife takes him to the cleaners. Cunt.

  20. Wonder what ever happened to Gordon?
    I’m not really interested in what this shit pusher has to say on TV ads just another pig at the trough 👎👎

  21. My ex wife’s ggrielg used to run a gay night club in London around 20 years ago and he told me that he saw Philip Schofield and Jason Donovan snogging in a dark corner. This was about the time they changed roles in The Technicolour Dream Coat stage show.
    Bet Jason is a bummer as well. He must be for leaving Kylie.

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