Jake Humphrey

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Having perused the list of cunts, I’m staggered this cunt doesn’t appear.

He’s like that cunt “Chappers” – anywhere and everywhere, any two bob sport will do.

The main issues I have with him are, as follows:

1. He’s a cunt.
2. He comes from a kids TV background and suddenly gets thrust into some main sports presenting roles – on what basis? My dead cunt of a Grandma knows more about BDSM than Humphrey does about sport – and she wouldn’t even know what the fuck it fucking meant, other than being a good effort at Scrabble.
3. Your name’s Jacob mate, not Jake.
4. He pontificates on Twatter like he DOES know something about sport. Jacob, you cunt…you don’t.

Also…he just looks like a cunt, the classic face I want to cave in with a fuck-off snow shovel.

So, I present to you, Jake Humphrey – turbo cunt.

Nominated by GeneralZod

34 thoughts on “Jake Humphrey”

  1. He’s got the type of face your arm would never get tired of punching.
    Bland, talentless, dodgy eyes, bag of cum.
    A supreme Cunt!

  2. Never heard of the cunt.
    Don’t watch or listen to any sport, so hopefully won’t hear of him again.
    You’re right about his face though! Fuck me, he looks like a cunt.

    • Never heard of him.
      How’d your granny know so much about BDSM?
      And could Ron have her number please?

  3. Don’t know him either, but he looks like he’s just graduated at the Nicky Campbell/Simon Mayo school of how to be a cunt

  4. This cunt got sacked from McDonalds FFS!!!!!!!!!
    So they gave him an Honorary Doctorate of Civil Law courtesy of University of East Anglia in 2012
    What a cunt

  5. That fat Manc “Chappers” deserves a cunting of his own. Forever bleating on about bollocks when he wasn’t kissing somebody’s arse. Typical BBC cunt.

  6. A good cunting General. Whenever he’s on I try to reason why I should pay a BT sports subscription to inflict this cunt on myself.
    I remember one football game they were covering in thick fog. The twat started laughing and thought it was hilarious. I’d have kicked his balls in if I’d been able to find him in the fog.

  7. All football pundits are useless overpaid over opiniated know all cunts . Gary Neville is a total boring cunt who now seems to like spouting his left wing views on Sky . The biggest cunt of them all has to be Gary Linekar , another wanker who seems have an opinion on everything , likes to think he is the big man but couldn’t fight his way out of a Walkers crisp packet .Cunt

  8. Extract from Jake Humphrey’s BT interview. :- Hello Jake take a seat we’ll just ask a few questions to ascertain your suitability . Ever played any sport professionally ? Er no . Ever played any sport recreationally ? Er no. Do you know anything about any sports ? Er no . Are you a cunt ? Certainly. Hmmm interesting . Do you think your amusing even though your humour is as cringe inducing as when a terminally unfunny cunt tries to make a best man speech ?Yes I’ve had many years experience I also went to university where I excelled at being an unpopular fucking square. That’s great Jake thank you. Your welcome .Well the interview panel are very impressed with you Jake . We’d like to offer you the role of talking bollocks about a subject you know fuck all about. Gary Lineker will be your mentor so you’ll be learning from one of Englands all time greatest cunts.

  10. I am not that familiar with Jake Humphrey, agree he does look a bit of a cunt but he cannot be as big a cunt as Steve Jones, presenter of F1 highlights on C4. He is an annoying cunt, Welsh so doesn’t have much going for him.

    On the subject of sport, the news today, shock horror….. a woman beat a man at the world championships, in fucking Darts! It’s hardly big news that a woman can throw three tiny bits of metal over a few feet just as well as a man.

  11. Never heard of him, but as always, absolutely prepared to accept the word of a fellow cunter that this cunt’s a cunt.

  13. He was brought up in Norwich. The inbred cunt. Nuff said. Probably pals with Steve Coogan.

  15. I would like to throw a javelin at him from a fair distance, say about 10 feet.
    Then I would laugh at him as he gave his knowledgable insight, with the the piercing his skull. The cunt.

  16. I would like to throw a javelin at him from a fair distance, say about 10 feet.
    Then I would laugh at him as he gave his knowledgable insight, with the javelin piercing his skull. The cunt.

    Day admin has put something in the desk, I am not impressed.

  19. Had to endure this cunt of F1 he’s now gone
    Fuck me he’s reappeared on BT Sport on the football an Opinionated cunt who seems to think he knows just about everting which he doesn’t 👎

  20. The biggest cunt in sport coverage is Martin Tyler, I’m sure this bloke writes scripts to read from if a certain player should score, he loves the drama, he also loves the sound of his own voice to the point I bet he practices in front of a mirror at home. He also loves his stats, he likes to inform us that so-and-so haven’t won here since 1957 when the great so-and-so scored in the 83rd minute.

    That Manc cunt Neville isn’t far behind either.

  21. This bloke is bloody annoying. Part of the new breed of happy, chipper, grinning idiots on tv. At least he’s not a token or….a female football presenter.

    • I actually don’t mind female sports presenter provided they actually have a real interest in the sport they are covering. Suzi Perry for instance is arguarbly the best motorbike racing presenter out there because she has been involved with the sport for over 25 years.

      It’s when they just plonk a woman in the job for diversity sake that rankles with me.

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