Just what is it with some people that makes them act the cunt on board an aircraft?

IsAC afficionados may recall me recently laying into ‘Bren’s Hens’, members of a party of porkers whose raucous, charmless behaviour made heavy going of a flight to Alicante. Twats indeed, but as I pointed out, at least their behaviour didn’t lead to a serious incident such as a fight. Or some muppet trying to force an aircraft door in mid air. Well allow me to move from the plural to the singular, and introduce 26-year-old chav princess, Chloe Haines, who it seems did indeed attempt to open an aircraft door on a jet2 flight out of (you guessed it) Stansted in June. It’s also alleged that the High Wycombe honey assaulted a crew member who tried to restrain her.

Needless to say, the aircraft was forced return to Stansted, where the idiot was arrested. It’s reported that the incident was deemed serious enough to warrant the scrambling of two fighter aircraft to escort the Airbus back. The airline has banned Haines for life, and plans to send her an 85k bill for costs arising from the incident.

Haines is due to appear at Chelmsford Crown Court in December, having been charged with a count of assault, and a count of recklessly acting in a manner likely to endanger an aircraft or persons in an aircraft. The cretin is out on bail meantime. Christ, there are some right fucking idiots about,and I get the impression that a fair share, if not the majority, of those acting up on flights are female. More cases of that there ‘toxic femininity’ perhaps? Anyway, these arseholes make flying, never the most pleasant of activities, that bit more miserable, and possibly hazardous, for the rest of us.

What are they? Cunts, that’s what.

Nominated by Ron Knee