Just what is it with some people that makes them act the cunt on board an aircraft?
IsAC afficionados may recall me recently laying into ‘Bren’s Hens’, members of a party of porkers whose raucous, charmless behaviour made heavy going of a flight to Alicante. Twats indeed, but as I pointed out, at least their behaviour didn’t lead to a serious incident such as a fight. Or some muppet trying to force an aircraft door in mid air. Well allow me to move from the plural to the singular, and introduce 26-year-old chav princess, Chloe Haines, who it seems did indeed attempt to open an aircraft door on a jet2 flight out of (you guessed it) Stansted in June. It’s also alleged that the High Wycombe honey assaulted a crew member who tried to restrain her.
Needless to say, the aircraft was forced return to Stansted, where the idiot was arrested. It’s reported that the incident was deemed serious enough to warrant the scrambling of two fighter aircraft to escort the Airbus back. The airline has banned Haines for life, and plans to send her an 85k bill for costs arising from the incident.
Haines is due to appear at Chelmsford Crown Court in December, having been charged with a count of assault, and a count of recklessly acting in a manner likely to endanger an aircraft or persons in an aircraft. The cretin is out on bail meantime. Christ, there are some right fucking idiots about,and I get the impression that a fair share, if not the majority, of those acting up on flights are female. More cases of that there ‘toxic femininity’ perhaps? Anyway, these arseholes make flying, never the most pleasant of activities, that bit more miserable, and possibly hazardous, for the rest of us.
What are they? Cunts, that’s what.
Nominated by Ron Knee
I was in High Wycombe over the weekend, visiting an RAF mate. Within easy commuting distance to London, you’d think it would have been gentrified and affluent. Nah, chavs and dar quays rule. A truly crap town.
As a regular flyer (sorry Greta) the behaviour that gets me on flights is the sneaky use of mobile phones to text, etc. Ok, the risk might be minimal but plane crashes tend to be very very terminal. Why risk it? Cunts.
22
Many, many things wind me up about flying Ron (funny cos I am normally so tolerant) – near the top of the list are cunts who stroll past the little sizing bins which show you how big your hand luggage can be, with fucking great Berghaus rucksacks that Bear Grylls would think excessive, before sauntering onto the plane completely unchallenged and proceeding to smash them into your face then attempting to cram them into the top hold, thus fucking every other piece of luggage in there?
Oh and the inevitable cunt sitting in front of you who smashes their fucking seat back into your nose the second the plane’s in the air?
10
Fucking hell Cuntan it’s making my blood boil just thinking about those fucks. Bastards.
8
And the cunts who as soon as the planes fucking wheels have touched the runway undo the seatbelts and start to unload their shit from the overhead holds. The cunts then spend the next fifteen minutes standing up blocking the fucking aisles. Stupid fuckers haven’t got the brains to realise that they’le have to wait for their baggage to be unloaded from the plane. Fucking tossers.
4
Pleaded guilty to endangering the safety of an aircraft and assaulting a member of the cabin crew. Will return to court for sentencing on Jan 24th and will get fuck all.
Sour faced, drunken old whore should get ten fucking years locked up with all the other pikeys. If you can’t hold your drink stay at home and knock back the wife beater while watching Slag Island and leave the rest of us alone you low life piece of shit.
39
Never fear “mental issues” is here!
Her defence lawyer will bang on about a hard deprived childhood, sexist abuse, hate crime etc etc, that turned this “lovable young lady” into a “confused angry mentally unbalanced woman” etc etc
Bottom line: suspended sentence, and a nice little cash pot for her “traumatic confessions” in the Daily Mail, Mirror, Sun, Breakfast TV etc etc
21
I always feel instead of minimal custodial sentences or 200 hours of unpaid work (which never gets done) a better punishment would be a good birching. I am sure these half witted tarts and violent lads would find a few welts across their arse. an inability to sit down for a week and the shame and embarrassment of a bare arsed whippjng in public would be a much better deterrent .and cure them of their behaviour
23
As Freddie points out above, her original sentencing date was pushed back into January. She’s got previous apparently, and I think the beak was asking for a case report or something on the stupid bint. As you say Techno, her brief will no doubt plead ‘mitigating circumstances’, and the court will give her a ten bob fine and a slap on the wrist. That’ll be her sorted… until the next time.
God I hope that the airline chases her arse for the 85k.
4
Being fair, I suspect that they will be a few of us who have “over-indulged” in the past and made a bit of a scene. Lucky our excitability didn’t result in fighter- jets being scrambled and an 85 thousand pound bill.
She is undoubtedly a Cunt though,if just for that ridiculous hair and fake tan.
19
She’s yet another byproduct of the typical TOWIE trollop. And no doubt she will plead mitigating circumstances on social media, while also setting up a “Go Fund Me” exercise to pay the £85k bill (which, realistically, she’s never going to pay)
It is also a great shame her normal but scared-shitless passengers and cabin-crew can’t take out a private prosecution to sue the bitch for a few more grand. But of course, she’s a chav, and therefore skint despite trying to look like a second-hand Katie Price.
17
Love the new avatar Dick.
5
I’m actually thinking of changing it to a baseball-bat in support of that poor lawyer who has been vilified in the papers lately for defending his chickens.
I noticed that there is a Cunting for him in the pipeline. I look forward to it with gusto.
Morning Lord C.
Morning All.
13
Your empathy with this poor unfortunate woman is truly praiseworthy Dick.
“Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.”
Good morning. 🙂
7
It’s nice to be nice,RTC.
5
Hmmm!
Not wishing to cast aspirations towards Mr Fiddler, but I rather suspect he is looking out for a nice but dim serving wench at Fiddler Towers!
I am sure in his mind’s eye he has measured her up for a fetching French Maid’s uniform, along with some much needed elocution lessons so that she does not appear to be too common when serving Dinner and High Teas for the gentry set.
I am sure he will welcome giving her “200 hours community service!”
9
Let he who has not caused an aircraft to be diverted cast the first stone.
7
Quite so Guzziguy. It’s the same with arson.
I mean, how many of us can honestly say that at one time or another he hasn’t set fire to some great public building? I know I have.
8
An airhead in the air. Nothing in her head but air.
So probably the cabin pressure compressed it and she freaked out. And she tried to open the door to get some air back into her head.
10
Wish I was a rich enough cunt to fly private. I love humanity and all that crap …but a commercial airliner full of cunts will often boil my piss. Departing Sydders last Tuesday interstate, I was sandwiched between two massive Māori blokes. I can’t guess their weight but they might have tipped the scales at somewhere near the 20 stone mark. The joker to my right across the aisle handed the trolly-dolly a bit of his seatbelt. It broke when he tried to harness himself in. Both these cunts need to lay off the ham.
13
Shes innocent.
She was good as gold at first, but was suddenly aggressive and disruptive?
She was heard to say “I aint going on no plane fool!”
And can only assume she was possessed by 80s tv character B A Barracus.
Its common for people to get possessed by yesteryears tv characters, as seen when recently during the general election polls when Jihn Lansman started shouting “mr grimsdale! Mr grimsdale!”.
15
I reckon the reason they caught her is because she took a selfie then got delayed searching for an InstaCunt filter named $wag.
Vain cunt.
3
She needs to calm down with a cool glass of milk, MNC. Mr T is awesome. 🙂
3
Perhaps she was on milk flavoured Lambrini MNC – “Ain’t doin’ wot I told fool, just gonna kill a couple of hundred suckas”..
4
Just think, she also has the ‘vote’ – 500 years in prison would not be long enough – cunt
12
The fighter jets should have shot the fucker out of the sky. She looks like a peaceful. That mop of blond and crop top gives the game away. She could have forced the plane to plow into the houses of parliament and where would we be then.Doesn’t bear thinking about.
8
Don’t talk about planes crashing into the Houses of Parliament please. I can’t deal with a hard on at this time of the morning.
Besides you know it would only happen when the cunts were on holiday and it would be a few poor cleaners and security guards who would cop it.
8
Close your eyes and think of Anna Soubry. Thatl do the trick
7
She could swallow a plane whole, with that gaping mouth/cunt of hers!
4
The delicious Anna? Shit, now I’ve got right stiff.
2
“It’s not my fault!” she pleads. “It’s the people who served me alcohol time and time again!”
or
“It’s not my fault!”, she pleads. “I was on the blob!”
or
“It’s not my fault!” she pleads. “It was a working class white-van-man looked at me in a funny way and it scared me!”
She’ll go through the whole “not my fault” repertoire come the hearing, and the judge will fall for it.
8
If I was her i’d become a Lezza and convert to Islam. Joining the Labour Party and getting a job at the BBC would also help. Play her card rights and she could end up with a nice bit of compo.
13
It’s always funny when they make a thing about a passenger trying to open a plane door mid-flight. It’s actually impossible to do, a plane door will not open unless there’s equal pressure inside and outside the aircraft.
Sensationalism at it’s best.
12
So did she know that when she tried to do it then? Seems to me that the intent was there & it would’ve frightened the shit out of the other passengers.
7
Mmmmmm these chavs are a complete nightmare We flew back from the USA with a couple of fools like Her. They are are either pissed as farts or complete retards 85K bill and banning for life sounds about right to me and a term in clink just for good measure They are complete cunts
14
Airlines need to get a sense of humour!
Cant do nowt nowadays!
From young ladies trying to let fresh air in, trying to start a jolly sing along, masturbation, jokingly shouting “ive got a bomb/gun etc
Its political correctness gone mad!!
9
Last time I went to the states some daft English bint whipped her mobile out the minute we landed and proceeded to yawp on in her fucking horrible estuary accent in the customs queue – bearing in mind there were massive NO PHONES signs everywhere, the US security guards did not take it well!! One bloke, basically a telephone box in a uniform (black rather than red though) proceeded to shout at her at the top of his voice while hovering his hand menacingly over the pistol in his holster, thouroughly humiliating her. Made her cry, brilliant it was!! I hoped he was going to say “you have 20 seconds to comply”
18
Yet another example of the “no one tells me what to do!” bubble in which these entitled twats inhabit.
Fair play to the security guard for bursting her pampered little bubble, but one suspects given her fragile mentality being stripped bare to the point of public humiliation she will be traumatised for the rest of her delicate snowflakery life.
10
One can but hope TC. I have to say I have a soft spot for our mouthy, gun-totin’ transatlantic chums; lot of parallels with Trump and Brexit
8
My Mrs and one of my daughters got a right bollocking from a gun toting security officer at Fort Lauderdale airport a couple of years ago. “We haven’t got all day mam” he screamed at them. Teach them to dawdle around searching for their passports the fucking pair of twats!
5
Fort Lauderdale for us too Westie, don’t fuck about do they!!!
2
No mate, they take it very seriously. Went again back in September and they’ve installed all these new fucking machines. Cunts to work out, but generally a very good airport and fantastic city and beach scene. Going again in June with a bit of luck.
1
Quite rightly so. Then when you get back to shitty Gatwick or Heathrow all the billboards are pictures of smiling peacefuls, effnicks, trans poove types etc.; nary a white face to be seen, fuck knows what visiting yanks think
1
Bloody hell I wish I’d been there to see that!
I would have loved it if he’d bawled ‘get down on the ground! Get down on the ground NOW!’
6
I’m genuinely surprised she acted the cunt, what with her looking such a lovely person and valuable member of society. Nice to see French Revolution hairstyles are back in.
6
One suspects a completely different tone, but an all too familiar one at that, had this stupid tart being a dark key and/or an ethnic minority from the land of camels and letterboxes.
In such an instance it would have been the fault of the:-
cabin crew
pilots
other passengers
the airline
the two fighter aircraft
the airport
the city
Boris
the Daily Mail
the country
the entire capitalist/imperialist western world…
… for being appalling racist towards this poor woman!
10
Nowt a hard right hook wouldn’t have sorted out.
The silly cunt.
9
This little scrubber ain’t worth commenting on other than I hope she gets put in HMP ‘lady-nick’ and a couple of fat-ugly Bull-dykes resembling Jess Philips and Emily Thornberry take turns with their tongues in her bum-hole……
Utter waste of time Cunt.
7
On the plus side, these are the cunts who chatter away and dance back and forth between their cunt friends on the other side of the aisle, paying no attention to the pre-flight safety announcements. So if, imaginary-man-in-the-sky forbid, the plane does go down, these are going to be the clueless cunts who don’t know what measures to take and will end up joining Lynyrd Sknyrd, hopefully leaving those of us who listened to the safety directions in a position to scramble over their mangled, blackened, probably still skwawking corpses, to safety.
Cunts.
7
I’d tounge her shithole. No more to be said.
5
Morning all.
We’re agreed then? This is a right cunt and no mistake?
8
These are the people that you get when you remove real discipline from children’s upbringing. Today’s twenty somethings are the first generation of adults that were never told no, were rarely chastised, they did sports where everyone is a winner, no one came second or perish the thought, last. Is it any wonder that these kids grow up to be the cunts they are? They are not prepared for real life, of which losing, or not getting what you want is a major part. Without being prepared for this as a child, drink or drugs are readily available, and acceptable means of ‘coping’, and the subsequent acting like a cunt behaviour an almost justifiable consequence, at least from the legal angle.
World of cunts…..
13
26 years old? Fuck me, she’s a rough looking haggard old bitch – no amount of fake tan is hiding that. What’s the pond life slut going to look like when she gets older? Do us all a favour and and get in a bath full of petrol and light a match so we don’t have to find out. Cunt.
12
As a punishment for the mad peroxide cunt may I suggest rounding up some of the people who were on the flight and invite them to Brize Norton for the chance to take a flight in a transport plane and at about 10,000 ft open the ramp ,then all the poor bastards who nearly had strokes and heart attacks can give the Icarus wannabe cunt a leg and a wing out into the blue yonder.
4
6/10 sad face
4
26 my arse, she looks about 50. And I can tell by looking at her that she’ll have a rather high reading on the biff whiff scale.
Stupid useless fucking old slut.
5
It makes you wonder what the fuck it’ll look like when it is fifty. She must spend a fucking fortune on peroxide as well.
2
Typical of this country she will get fuck all in court. How about sending a message out to the would be dickheads out there? Cases like this, five years in the clink minimum. Carrying a knife, ten years minimum. Kill someone whilst driving pissed / excessive speeding, 20 years minimum. Not holding my fucking breath though for this stupid twat endangering 100 plus lives.
5
I wonder how much the fine will equate to from her universal credit. She really should have been choked out or smacked forcibly round the chops.
3
Chloe’s only mistake was not being a rich American rock star who could pay for the best justice money can buy and throw Bono into the ‘witness’ box to gush about what a great human being you are despite not actually witnessing the event in question. Yes the great humanitarian Bono doing his bit to ensure a person who endangered the lives of hundreds of ordinary people got away with it. Fuck the little people.
1
Is it just me, or has the shortarse Irish taxdoger been keeping his head down a bit of late? He doesn’t seem to have been gobbing off so much lately.
7
Rancid cock sucking whore.
1
More to the story than is being reported I’m sure..
Two fighter jets scrambled to intercept a drunken loutish bint trying to open a plane door? Really? What were they going to do, shoot her with a bint seeking missile she opened the fucking thing?
I think she most likely overheard a conversation between two peaceful passengers about a cunning plan and she freaked and wanted off the plane before they could implement it. They in turn were nuetralized by the secret agents tailing them on the plane and she was flagged up as the scapegoat for the whole affair.
She’s still a cunt though and looks like a caravan dweller.
0