Jared O’Mara has done the honourable thing and decided to resign as an MP due to ‘mental health problems.’

He has decided to go after their long summer recess. Some might think that this is due to a desire to maintain his salary whilst doing Sweet Fuck All.

Nominated by Guzziguy

Seagulls

The cunts. The greedy, noisy, shit all over you and your stuff cunts.

Now to be honest, I’m fairly fortunate in the fact that I live way out in the sticks so I have the usual wildlife to contend with.. badgers, rabbits, deer, packs of roaming feral cats and cyclicunts.

However, it’s when I go to work is when these little cunts end up fucking me over.

Picture this if you will. I work 60 odd hours a week and drive a 20 mile round trip to and from work every day, I drive a nice motor and it is my pride and joy, yet these little bastards seem to think it’s a big old target used for carpet bombing with shit. Every fucking day I’m having to wash the motor at £5 a go to get shot of the toxic shite these fuckers pepper it with. Thats £35 a week! My fucking tax is less than that a month (big engine, about £28) It’s almost like these cunts are purposely targeting cars and people. I’ll sit and have a smoke in the car on my dinner and lo and behold, these cunts even manage to shit through the fucking window, yet god for-fucking-bid you launch a stone at or hoof one of these fat bastards without being fined or arrested for attacking a protected species, thanks to wankers like Chris Packham and the other ecocunts.

Fuck me, they even manage to attack at one in the morning, when I walk from the Mrs’ to work after I’ve been round for a poke. Last fucking thing I want spoiling my post coital bliss is being shat upon by a flock of noisy winged cunts.

Moreso, I’m about 50 miles from the nearest fucking bit of sea. How the cunting fuck have these bastards managed to migrate inland and fucking stay here?

What the ecocunts need to do is repatriate these fuckers back to the shitholes they were resigned to, like Blackpool, and let us non-near sea living folk shoot the fuckers as soon as they’re out of their inclusion zone.

Cunts

Nominated by GrandCuntRailRoad

The Muslim Council of Britain are a bunch of cunts.

I honestly don’t know where to start, I mean obviously first off, because I’m cunting them this immediately makes me a de facto racist. I mean how could anyone have anything bad to say about Muslims.

Anyway, they’re launching a campaign in parliament because they believe that the media portray Islam and Muslims in a bad light………

They said they looked at 10000 articles from the last three months of 2018 and 59% linked Muslims to negative behaviour………

Just to note this study carried out was not open to academic analysis (surprise surprise) but was analysed by a linguistics analyst? (Does not say what religion said analyst was, but I think we can guess).

The press regulator IPSO is planning on releasing new guidelines this autumn of how to report on Islam, probably by saying you can’t say anything bad about Islam.

Why do they get so much special treatment? It is also worth noting that one of the biggest culprits for negative news on Islam and Muslims was by the media outlet Christian today. I mean, surely par for the course, the two religions have only been at war for around 1400 years, so you would expect the odd bias opinion between the two.

I mean the obvious answer would be for Muslims to stop doing so many socially negative news worthy activities, stop grooming young girls, or oppressing women, or stealing cars, or selling drugs, or blowing yourselves up. I’m sure the bad press will clear up in no time.

More likely it will become illegal to say anything bad about Islam, even if they break the law. Better still, they’ll be campaigning for it to be illegal not to be Muslim next.

Nominated by elboobio

I’d like to nominate weekend bores. Those who bore you to death all week talking about what they’ve got planned, and then spend Monday boring you to death telling you about it.
If I get asked what my plans are, I just tell them that I might do this that or the other and then might do it or not. They never ask me again.

Nominated by Mystic Maven

A nomination for tattooed women. Not the fat ugly chavs, where we expect it, but the really attractive or beautiful women who have these hideous things. Saw one this evening at the swimming pool – beautiful blonde in a black bikini, fine figure, but when she turned around, lo and behold, a huge bird’s wing across her shoulder and left breast, and other silly things down one of her legs and on her hands. It certainly dampened my ardour. Naturally her tosser of a boyfriend was covered in them too. She also had one of those hideous navel piercings, ughh, the ultimate turn-off.

Nominated by Mystic Maven