Aladdin is a cunt, isn’t he?
This story is having another make-over as Hollywood, bereft of ideas, deficient of creativity, has decided to rehash this hackneyed shit for more moolah.
I thought he was Chinese but it’s now set in Arabia. Let the sanitising begin.
No mention of killing infidels or murder training camps because the fairy story of Aladdin was created before the fairy story of Allåh was created. Perhaps they should’ve made a modernised film, Aladdin joins a death squad, becomes a Religious fanatic, travels through eleven countries perpetually claiming to be a “refugee” then arranges to meet Jasmine, one of his four pregnant 16-year old wives while strapping a bomb to his back but calling it a ‘magic lamp.” Psh.
As the cherry on the turd, this shitestorm has a special whiff of crap: Will “cuntface” Smith is the Genie which means layers of treacly, smug charm, casual “he’s a white boy” comments, and teeth bleached to ‘dazzle’ mode. What a load of Camel shit on a flying carpet.
? A whole new wo-orrld…✨ Get fucked.
Nominated by Captain Magnanimous
Robin Williams was a bigger cunt to be fair.
4
Thats debatable… but i don’t think hes as annoying or as untalented as will smith at least his voice worked for the animated aladdin this will smith as the genie is sad hilarious and cringey
6
Mindy was quite fuckable.
12
She certainly was, RTC !!!!!
3
I’ve got a boulder for Mindy all right!
2
Good cunting!! Dunno whats to dislike most, Scientology loving jug eared egomaniac Will Smith or Aladdin story. Liked Aladdin sane but thats it! Didnt genie used to be hairy manic depressive mork?
7
I fancy Aladdin work.
2
People who like these kind of films also like :
Marmite
Skinny jeans
Morley’s chicken shop
Anal intercourse
10
Sorry Freddy. I detest this shit and it’s superfucking hero ilk but am very fond of Marmite. I leave the anal to Krav or B&WCunt’s tongue. I look a right cunt in skinny jeans and have no fucking idea what Morley’s chicken shop is, though I did work in Morley, Leeds a couple of years ago. And it probably has a chiggun shop.
8
There’s a Morley’s Chicken shop in Perry Hill, round the corner from my girlfriend’s mum’s. There are many more, all in South East London (places like Lewisham, Forest Hill, Catford) and are quite good, assuming you’re sufficiently wankered.
5
The morleys I’m forest hill is utter filth and deep down, we both know this.
I thought you was a posh lad, what know you of chicken shops in such ungodly places?
2
All about the Forest Hill BBQ House gents cracking feed in there
1
As explicitly stated, M-R, my girlfriend’s mum lives in Perry Hill, and I periodically get muntered.
My girlfriend hails from Catford/Forest Hill, still has property in Lewisham and Peckham, and I have been known to have a cheeky takeaway in those parts.
I’m also not as “posh” as you perhaps imagine, especially when “in wine”.
1
+ 1 for marmite. I wouldn’t love it so much if the rest of our british cuisine didn’t all just taste like boiled vegetables and piss.
God damn tang is so good!
5
Ram it, ram it, ram it
Ram it up yer poop chute
5
I love a bit of Marmite on my toast.
2
Nice bit of marmite on cheese on toast Johnny.
1
Krav loves a bit of Marmite on his dick.
4
Toasted cheese and Marmite sarnie.
1
Someone said about filming a blue movie this is how the dozy cunt showed up on set!
5
I hate Will Smith NOT because hes black but because hes a shit actor I can’t think of even one film where i liked his performance at least samuel l cuntson had pulp ficton as a decent likable role but then he got type cast every role after that as the same “royale with cheese” and “say what again” grows annoying after awhile
8
Evening TS
Smith is always sliding in little racist quips. They were subtlety in Men In Black and I remember one episode of The Fresh Cunt Of Bel Air when he held up a dollar and with that shit-eating grin said, “Abraham Lincoln: The only white guy I’ve ever liked.” Imagine the reverse of that situation. He’s a bland actor that does ‘zany’ to compensate for his lack of talent.
7
I find his views on race balanced. He told the Holywood-so-white brigade to fuck off the stupid cunts.
5
How are you captain good morning bit of a late reply here but yeah his fresh prince of bel air was the only role that fit will smith at least his personality fit fresh prince. Bel air having some anti white jokes wasn’t unusual it was afterall a black comedy show the carlton character and the dad were the funniest and best part of that show tho
Then he reached cuntdom and was starred in every role and stupid film ever anybody remember hancock? or that stupid zombie film he did again utterly talentless. His wife Jada ironically on the otherhand isn’t that bad at acting she has a bit more ommpf really enjoying her fish mooney character in batmans gotham tv series
3
Doing a live action cgi film based on a animated film is a dumb stupid as fuck idea but these greedy ceo money whores from hollywood don’t care they will shit out these low effort cuntfests and the stupid fucks lap it up
Another bad idea for a film where cgi is used stupidly is sonic the hedgehog, holy fuck i don’t know where to begin with this abortion of a concept for a film based on a old video game. Just stick to the video game this film looks like literal cancer in video form its just a shameless cash grab
8
I still remember having to endure sitting through ‘Who Framed Roger Rabbit’ with my really irritating girlfriend who kept laughing every 10 seconds and glancing at me with that “isn’t it amazing?” look on her stupid face. Split up not long afterwards thankfully. Fuck her.
6
Dear RTC, I think I ended up marrying her after you kicked her out. My wife – and her mother – inflict so-called comedies on me and laugh their way through them while I sit glumly on the sofa fantasing about how I would like to blow away everyone associated with the film.
4
You have my utmost sympathy Mr Polly!
1
Not generally a big fan of comedies but Who Framed Roger Rabbit wasn’t that bad the special effects were well executed. I hate overreactions to films Ruff isn’t it amazing remark sums up your gfs cuntish reaction
Who Framed Roger Rabbit isn’t even close to the cringey abortion that is the new sonic film go watch the new trailer for that ruff an tell me you didn’t feel like commiting suicide or wanting to go personally find the cunts responsible for the film and tearing their eyes from their sockets
3
Good morning TitS. Or whatever the time is in your Canadian neck of the woods.
Sadly I don’t need to see any trailers to make me feel like committing suicide, I feel like that most days, and it would probably push me over the edge. You wouldn’t want that on your conscience. (don’t bank on it – Ed.)
Btw, I can guarantee you would hate Roger Rabbit with a vengeance if you were forced to sit through it with my (mercifully) ex girlfriend.
She watched that video day in day out for fucking weeks, often with other poor saps she pulled in off the street!
Mind you, she had a body to die for.
PS: I love comedies.
3
Its 6:24 am right now leaf time, well if she had a body to die for she could of pulled me off the street… I would be happy to rewatch the movie with your mildy annoying hot ex girlfriend
2
Big mouth? Runs on a lot? Perfect replacement for Robin Williams.
Disney are creatively bankrupt..
8
They sure are creatively bankrupt explains why they want to do tthese dumb live action remakes of their old animated classics with beauty and the beast then dumbo and now with aladdin
They will make a bloody killing tho people are stupid they will pay good money to see these cuntfests
3
Well if Aladdin is black I suppose they’d better rename it ‘”astabbin”.
Have to confess though I rather liked Will Smith in men in colour.
But then he begat Jaden who is the utterly cuntiest cunt in all of cuntdom. After earth! Fuck me, makes battlefield earth seem like Shakespeare.
And as for the uber brat cunt in the day the earth stood still reboot. I was cheering for the aliens and there simply are no words that can convey the sheer concentration of cunt in that uberomnicunt.
Walt must be turning in his grave!
7
Is it me, or does an African-Yank as the genie not smack of cultural appropriation?Great nom, Cap’n. Smith’s a cunt and that cynical, squeeze a buck until it squeaks outfit Disney are ubercunts.
5
Only Pale-Faces can culturally appropriate. That’s the rule. If a Native European was in the role of a middle-easterner the PC snowflakes would be melting all over the media.
As if brownies are somehow more flattered to be played by nig-nogs I’m so sure.
4
Fuck me, I thought I was the only one who hated this cunt. I could start a website called WillSmithIsACunt.co.uk so much do I hate him.
7
Is it cos he is blue?
7
Anything having to do with Disney is rotten, waffley cunt.
3
Thank God he turned down the role of Neo in The Matrix for Wild Wild West.
4
I forgot to say in my nomination that Lenny Henry played the genie onstage in London so that makes Aladdin alright.
Psh
⚪ Cunt
2
😂😂😂
He looks a complete tit in that photo.
3
He *is* a complete tit, period. The photo only confirms what we knew..
No love for this schvartzer übermensch poster boy for the newly merged church of Sciento-nation-of-islamology…..
(really the Sciloons and the faux black Muslims have joined forces….)
3