Big Lottery winners are complete and utter cunts-especially the ones who go public with the wonga.It aint enough that they’ve pulled off the impossible-sometimes beating odds of 100,000,000 to 1.Youve got more chance of growing a 20 inch dick,winning the Olympic 100m and landing on the moon,all within 6 months.No they have to rub it in the cunts,opening champagne bottles all over the gaff,brandishing huge cheques with “Please pay A.Cunt £99,999,999” .and gurning for the cameras with inane grins plastered across their cuntish faces.Yes,it could be you-especially if you are a complete and utter cunt.
Nominated by CuntsR-Us
Always fat cunts. Usually old and Scottish.
Utter good for nothing cunts that deserve nothing more than a kick in the nuts and a dog shit pie in the face.
ARSEHOLES….
17
Agree, Deploy… Always scum cunts who act the flash bastard who win it… Never someone who worked their arses off, lived modestly and honestly, and never had any trouble with the law…. Always some fat tattooed troublemaking balloon who puts their win in peoples faces… Or some Tasha’s Mam slag who buys herself some new tits and a ticket to Magaluf… Scum….
14
Lucky, lucky, lucky cunts to win the loot. I suppose it’s some compensation for them for being complete genetic fuck-ups.
If I won, I’d certainly keep it quiet.
Whilst on the subject, why did the have to fuck the lottery up completely a few years ago, buy doubling the price and making winning even more unlikely? Surely it would be better to have more winners rather than utter cunts winning ludicrous amounts once every couple of months? A mortgage clearing amount plus maybe £100k, would suit me fine.
13
It’s the sheer lack of imagination that so many of them show that Fucks me off. All this going back to work the next day,giving their kids (who’ll be praying for the Cunts to hurry up and cark) a few quid for a house deposit,buying a shitty run- of-the-mill car,going to Benidorm for a weeks All-inclusive because “We’ve been going there every year since 1979,there’s proper English food and not too many foreigners).
Fuck all that. Not for me anything as altruistic as Rebel Without a Cause setting up a political party. I plan to “Spend,Spend, Spend”,and why not? I have no relations who I plan on giving any more pleasure from my death than they’ll already get. Sponging Devils. I plan to live a life dedicated to self-abuse (not much change there),where I will indulge my every whim. I will,however,dedicate a large chunk of my win towards causing mischief…things like buying the second Pub in my nearest village and then giving the beer away for free,just to upset that old trout who runs the one from which I’m barred.
Fuck them.
27
People who waste money buying Lottery tickets are cunts by default. That’s why only cunts win.
11
What really fucks me off is the lardarse greedy bleeders who win 30 million and then say they will go on playing the fucking lottery (one or two have even had a second big win). It’s not that I mind them blowing it all on whores and horses, and a gold lame pair of incontinence knickers and a lifetime subscription to The Sun, it’s the fact that the slow moving slow witted bastards that do this fucking thing a couple of times each week, always do it, and take their fucking time doing it, when all I want to do is pay for my paper and fuck off, but no we have to wait while the cunts find their money then get a fistful of old cards out of their pockets and insist the assistant check to see they haven’t won a fiver of their own money back. Utter tripehounds.
2
Good point – it takes the dopey cunts at least five times as long to buy a ticket or a scratch card than a whole shopping trolley full of other shite.
There should be a separate checkout for these pinheads.
3
I loved the dustbin chav man who won millions and then proceeded to blow it all on cocaine, hookers, and antiques (lol). And is now working as a dustbin man again. Painfully British.
It’s amazing to watch people struggle to justify their existence after winning and finally eating that carrot that was dangling in front of them.
Never a better argument for the existence of a creative universal force than seeing old, fat droid individuals winning big and fucking up. No one sensible ever wins it – god is a maliciously funny cunt, apparently.
8
Off topic but I’m having great fun taking revenge on those flies that have plagued my place of residence in recent weeks with my righteous fly swatter of doom. My turn now you evil, multi eyed vermin.
5
I recently got this fly spray from a place in Cheetham Hill… Black with a red lid and some (I think) Russian writing on it… It knocks Raid for six and the fly cunts spaz about and then go out in spectacular style… It also works on the house fly (the smaller than the Bluebottle cunt), while Raid only dazes the fuckers… But this shit destroys the bastards and in style… Wonder if it’s Putin’s officially endorsed by the Kremlin fly spray? Those Ivans sure know their shit where killing pests with spray is concerned…
6
I have some spray as well but I don’t particularly like to use it for obvious reasons. I’ve sprayed some around the house anyway but I prefer the swatter because for me it’s more direct – oh, and I like the feeling of killing the nasty little things directly at my hand.
1
Try Israeli K400.
One little spritz and close the windows and doors.
Half hour later dead things that you never knew were your room mates are laying feet up on the floor.
They did a K1000 too. Would really like to know what that does.
3
I was given an electric tennis racket swatter by a mate for Xmas! I’ve perfected my backhand but my forehand needs some attention!!
Makes a lovely crackle when it connects to a flying insect!
6
I loved the dustbin chav man who won millions and then proceeded to blow it all on cocaine, hookers, and antiques (lol). And is now working as a dustbin man again. Painfully British.
It’s amazing to watch people struggle to justify their existence after winning and finally eating that carrot that was dangling in front of them.
Never a better argument for the existence of a creative universal force than seeing old, fat droid individuals winning big and fucking up. No one sensible ever wins it – god is a maliciously funny cunt, apparently
4
Lottery winners are like rich cunts in general…….we only know about the ones who choose to tell us about it. Therefore we think all rich cunts are like Branson and Sugar and all lottery winners are fat, old barely human chavs because they are the fuckers who can’t help bragging about it.
Having said that the only cunts I see buying the tickets tend to be fat, disgusting tattoed fucking old slags. It’s basically a tax on the poor and a massive fucking con. But yer gotta be innit to winnit aintcha?
6
I’ll buy one very, very occasionally (talking less than even once a year) if the jackpot is particularly massive because hey – a throwaway couple of quid isn’t gonna hurt and you never know. But I certainly don’t make it a regular habit.
6
I used to play in a syndicate when a Saturday lad at a butchers, £14 back over three years, let the good times roll!
The US Powerball Lotto is truly bizarre since in most states where its played the rules are the winners have to be named, some unlucky cunt might have a John Paul Getty moment and get an ear from a loved one and a ransom demand in the post. Plus some of these jackpots are hundreds of millions and have the option of instalments over 20/30 years or a reduced lump sum, before tax, cunts.
3
The real cunts are Camelot taking a nice fucking cut each week. How the fuck can a group (in this case fucking Canadians – Mark Carney perhaps) earn 1p from each £2 ticket. So everyone time you see a £100 million winner just remember some Canadian cunt is spunking or squirting! over a tidy pile of cash of their own. The thing that bothers me is that theirs is guaranted while for the rest of the UK this tax on the daft continues unabated and unrewarded, unless you count a few fucking gold medals won by our able and disabled athletes.
As my old man said when another scratch card came up with fuck all “at least I can still watch some cripple from Colchester win a bronze in the wheelchair shot putt in Tokyo”
6
The first thing the fat cunts go out and buy is a top of the range sports car, like an Aston or Ferrari.
Then they sell it, because they can’t fit in it.
2