Cunts that hate the word ‘cunt’

So, the odd ‘bugger’ is OK, ‘fuck’ in an EXTREME circumstance, but ‘CUNT’ – oh no, apparently a slightly different word for a twat, vaj or muff is just too fucking much to cope with.

What’s wrong with these people? Presumably they are the type that are OK to sit and watch all the nightmarish realities that the TV wangs on about, they are happy to continue existing as a duplicitous blob – gradually consuming the worlds resources whilst giving less than fucking nothing back…but the WORD cunt….well fuck me that is just OFF FUCKING LIMITS.

I’m also guessing that this type acknowledges that bad shit goes on, or indeed that they are doing it, but “oooh, I don’t want to see that” – code for “I’m too fucking lazy and ignorant to do anything, now leave me alone to my third McD’s of the day you poo poo bum.” Hypocritical, head-burying fucktards without an ounce of understanding as to the finer points of the English language and who will never truly know the pleasure of heartfeltly stating, directly at someone, that they are a fucking cunt cunt. Derek and Clive style. Cunts!

Nominated by IHateYou

Anti-cunt cunts who treat the word ‘cunt’ as off-limits are indeeds cunts.

I was once caught in a cuntfire on public transport. Your classic, bovver-booted shitcunt feminist-looking stool sample entered the same tube carriage as your humble narrator during one glorious morning commute, and insisted on holding onto the bar that I had leaned a large item of luggage against. As the train jarred and jolted, said luggage would logically grind her cunt-smeared hand. I wouldn’t fucking mind but it wasn’t exactly a heaving carriage and the cunt clearly could have moved somewhere more spacious. But no. Not this cunt.

I started to get abuse from this fucker which included ‘prick’, ‘arsehole’ and ‘fucking idiot’. After swallowing much of this, to which may I add fellow tube passengers were loving and mirthfully eavesdropping, such unwarranted public abuse I could take no more. I looked it full square in the face and said “you cunt”. What an uproarious reaction. Instant social death. Mutterings included “there’s no need for that”. “bloody hell”. “my god”. But at least it shut the fucker up and made her move away.

Thank god this was all before the phonecam Stasi generation. I would have otherwise been made infamous as the viral ‘Cunt-calling cunt cunt’. I mean, that would be true, but I wouldn’t have wanted my then-employers to know, as they were definitely anti-cunt-calling.

Nominated by The Empire Cunts Back

100 thoughts on “Cunts that hate the word ‘cunt’

  1. Recently I witnessed a conversation over prosecco etween 2 middle class liberal women in their 60s. They liked comedy and they especially liked Michael Macintyre, but they didn’t like swearing?! Where had they been living all their lives? Precious twats.

      • And he looks as thick as pig shit and twice as nasty. I can’t stand that grin on his face all the time.

      • I have to admit to enduring one of this cunts shows when accompanying my daughter when her friend took ill.

        A night I will never fully forget, suffered a feeling i can only describe of being seasick and halfway to a hypnotic state. I put this down to the way the cunt ran from one side of the stage to the other all night while telling us of his drive to the area, his hotel check in and stay experience right up until he put out the light to go to sleep.

        The place was in uproar of laughter, I didn’t find it very funny though as I encountered all the things he spoke about when I worked away from home and stayed in hotels.

        All those nights when I was locked out my hotel room, it wasn’t funny and I didn’t hear anyone around me laughing at my misfortune either.

        Another night of my life that I won’t ever get back!

    • According to MSM the night of the 2015 riots in London (selfish cunts). A couple in a bar in Richmond were concerned about the rioting. What’s wrong with that you say….they were not concerned about declining moral standards, fire or damage to people and property. Oh no, they were concerned that their golf game the next day might be affected by the growing mob and an assault on Wimbledon Golf course. Shame the cunts didn’t get their concerns actualised.

      • I will never forget watching the riots of 2011, a runt of a chimp straddling the flat screen TV on the wall of the bookmakers in a bid to pull it off the wall.

        The cunt had both his feet flat on the wall while he pulled with everything he had, think he ended up giving up after failure with other larger chimps.

        http://www.thegamehunter.co.uk/news/ladbrokesriotprooftv/

        Nothing wrong with a good riot but those cunts went too far when they started looting as well.
        No need for that shit, though they made Flabott & Co so proud of Hackneys finest performance.

        They have the cheek to wonder why they get “stereotyped” and are subjected to stop and search procedures? Criminal cunts, that’s why.

  2. Nothing like a well timed and directed “Cunt” at a deserving subject. Thank fuck for ISAC and its no holds barred attitude to informing cunts of their shortcomings also a mention for the Cunter’s Dictionary which I have browsed occasionally, educational, informative with enough material for any situation.

  3. You can get away with saying CUNT more the you can say ” my god”.
    All the snowflake media cunts when exclaiming something tend to say “oh my gosh” or “oh my goodness”.
    Don’t know about you but I’ve never used those phrases when making an exclamation. It’s probably to appease our peaceful friends mainly because we know how tolerant they are of mentions of God.
    Hearing a woolyback like Chris Evans say ” oh my gosh” sounds so obviously fake it’s a joke. And for all the God botherers out there “my God” is not specific as there ain’t no such thing ya CUNTS

  4. It’s like cunts who say ‘Sod off’ and ‘Bugger off’ without batting an eyelid, but then go all shocked when they hear ‘Fuck off’…. Like they seem to think actual natural male/female sex is more offensive than taking it up the Rick Witter…. Daft cunts…

    • FUCK is just good ole Anglo-Saxon.

      The only problem for me is when the beautiful word comes in the same sentence as The Flabbott, Lady Weegee &c.

      Nightmare territory, truly…

  5. Breaking Al BBC news “Saudia Arabia is the new women’s paradise” apparently it has allowed women to drive and opened cinemas. Wow its only 2018 maybe by the year 3000 they will have given women the vote allowed the Practice of other religions and Homosexuality. A bit like normal countries do, you know show Tolerance. But I’m not holding my breath.

    • I actually agree with banning wimin from diving, they are plainly ill equipped to perform the task. You may say, “but there are female racing drivers”. So fucking what? What does being a racing driver have to do with driving a car through an urban area, with junctions, road signs, pedestrians and other road uses? Fuck all! You see, the poor dears just don’t have the spacial perception that men posses. This isn’t misogyny, well not much at any rate, it is scientific fact. Wiminz have more perception of shoes and hand bags than men do, good for them, stick to buying your 100th pair of shoes or that snide LV handbag you can’t afford ( and even if it’s genuine it makes you look a right chav cunt ). And before you say wiminz are safer drivers, as evidenced by their cheaper car insurance premiums, that too is bogus. The actual fact is that wiminz have fewer accidents than men because men can see them coming and give them a very wide berth.

      The same goes for voting. It all started to go sideways when wiminz got the vote. And that poor horse. If they had any shred of decency they would desist from voting as their right to vote came as a direct result of a barbaric act of animal cruelty.

      And another thing; if you need further proof that wiminz are unfit to vote, just look no further than feminists saying that their sisters being compelled to wear a tent is empowering. How in the name of freshly ground fuck does that work? I suppose in the same vein FGM is liberating as it absolves wiminz from the responsibility of having multiple orgasms.

      Well ladies, if you want to avoid the big O, I’m your fucking man. No need to have your fanny ripped apart by some sweating goat herder with a rusty stanley knife. I come first in my house, then roll over, fart and fall asleep.

      • How do these cunts even get their licences?!
        Probably can’t even speak English and no doubt tried to get some kind of pay out from someone for her cuntitude.

      • Holy fuck – that is cuntitude of the highest order.

        I imagine that there is no way she has a driving license – how the fuck can the examiner tell who is sitting next to him if they are dressed head to toe in a fucking bin bag?

      • From my experience (and I do have some) Muzzie women are just the worst drivers out there. Slow, indecisive and no idea.

        Closely followed by Eastern European men, who like to drink heavily and drive fast, with inevitable results. Don’t give a fuck about our laws, usually no tax and no insurance. If you are unlucky enough to be hit by one of these fuckers you will find yourself with a major problem.

        All cunts.

      • Jesus wept.

        I thought at one point that it was trying to get the waggon up the front path.

        And had to get out to see what it was doing ??!
        It might help to avoid wearing a load of old bandages on the head.

        Fuckwittery at its worst….

      • I feel there is some truth in this. I have lost count of the number of times I’ve pulled up at a roundabout where a woman is waiting to come into my lane from my right – and they just sit there! They appear to have no idea that they have right of way and wait for a gap in the traffic they are attempting to join. Plus why don’t women seem to know the difference between left and right?

      • Yeah women do seem to have trouble with the simplicity of a the roundabout. I bet if it were shaped like a cock they’d be able to handle it just fine.

      • Probably got it’s ‘peaceful’ flip-flop wedged under the loud pedal.

        Also probably used to piloting camels as opposed to a motor car.

        What a bell-end.

    • Surely women won’t be out driving with headgear on?

      A former colleague of mine got done for careless driving due to having scraped a double letterbox size portion of his frozen windscreen one morning after a nightshift. I waited till he was well away before I ventured out the car park, the silly cunt.

  6. To all those cunts who get upset if you use the word cunt but are quite OK with calling someone a berk; berk is cockney rhyming slang, Berkshire hunt=CUNT!!!

    And those who use the initial letter of a word but won’t actually say the word, like saying the “c” word or God forbid the “n” word. We all know what the fucking words in question are, you aren’t fooling anybody you know. And as for sparing the children, please do fuck off. Kids are some of the most foul mouthed cunts of the lot, it’s their one and only redeeming feature.

    • To date, I never recall being surrounded by worse language than I was during my schooldays. And that includes all kinds of work environments, pubs, bars etc.

      Excluding ISAC, of course!

  7. Love that Derek and Clive sketch and Empire’s story was brilliant.

    Had a girlfriend back in the 1990s who used our favourite word all the time. She absolutely loved shagging too. Had to get rid though because she was a total mental case. Wish I had known Dick Fiddler back then as I’m sure he could have given me some sound relationship advice.

    My latest post includes a great rant by Bill Maher about why Western civilisation is better than (not just different to) certain other parts of the world…

    https://mikesplace2017.wordpress.com/2018/03/07/quote-of-the-day-10-update-2/

  8. ‘Lowest rated Oscars in HISTORY. Problem is, we don’t have Stars anymore, except your President (just kidding, of course)!’

    Viva Big Don!

    Snowflake and celebrislag piss boiler par excellence!

    • At this point, I don’t care how corrupt or fradulent The Donald may be – they are all corrupt in American politics anyway, especially recent presidents – but I just fucking love the way he so easily triggers those cunts who have made slagging him off into a full-time profession.

  9. Anyone remember the two Ronnies The Worm That turned? It is now reality…….

  10. I recently had a run in with 2 members of the redskin community (travellers) in a car park, they dont like being to told to “fuck off you CUNTS”. Sour surly twats.

    • The best thing any cunt can do to cunts who don’t like the word “cunt” is to say “cunt off you cunty cunt”.

  11. Not sure if anyone has watched early series of Curb Your Enthusiasm, but there is liberal usage of the word ‘cunt’, including the memorable episode ‘Beloved Aunt’.

    Rare for a mainstream TV show and especially an American one.

    • My favourite episode!
      Hilarious.

      Loved the Christ nail one as well. Think that’s the one where he gets caught on camera playing with a bra.

    • The Sopranos was liberally peppered with the cunt word. Tony Soprano would use it to great effect.

    • I think Americans use the word Cunt when referring to a woman. It’s not used in any other context.

      • American comedian Bill Burr uses cunt quite a lot, not just to refer to wiminz. But 90% of the time you are corrects, septics use it as a derogative term for split arses.

      • It’s liberally used in Game Of Thrones, especially by that Scottish prick knows never seems to die.

        My favourite one was by (the surprisingly good) Jerome Flynn: “There’s no cure for being a cunt.”

    • I have and each episode is epic. Particularly the Black Family story. I think it would be an excellent use of time to petition Larry David, and in the next series. Current one is absolutely top notch. He could do the word Cunt justice, cause outrage in America and no doubt come up with a unique episode of well-formed comedic story telling about his own experiences of Cuntingness.

  12. am I correct in thinking a Twat is a pregnant goldfish?
    Likewise women only have legs to stop them making a mess like snails.

  13. The word FUCK is only bettered by the word CUNT. I find it very useful in a variety of everyday events, driving, working, listening to tv or radio but the strange thing is I can’t bring myself to utter it in the presence of women. Call me old fashioned if you like, failing that, cunt will suffice.

    • I’ve always found ‘fucking cunt’ as the default stongest combination without having to go out of my way to add artificially compounded words like shitcunt, cuntfuck etc. Both ‘fucking’ and ‘cunt’ not only have a great flow, but also amplify the profane level beyond the mere sum of the component parts.

      I also like the casual effect of following mild adjectives with the word ‘cunt’; like silly cunt, daft cunt, dozy cunt etc.

      Best not to analyse the cunt construct too much though, as it rather spoils the spontaneous joy in the act of cunting.

      • Slut is word i like , it justs rolls off the tounge, you can say it quickly with emphasis on the “t” or drag it out with emphasis on the “u”, lovely word.

      • ‘Fucking old whore’ is a nice three-parter, and absolutely guaranteed to offend.

  14. This does not work if you are a motorcyclist and fail to open your visor. All the recipient hears is ‘mph’, and the visor steams up. Cunterproductive. Also, you need to keep the bat handy in a scabbard by your side.

    However, if you’re in in a helmet and full leathers with Kevlar inserts, there’s not much an antsy pushbiker can do to you once push comes to *push*…’mph’…*shove*….’mph’…

  15. De-cunting alert!! The film “Black Panther” has been criticised for being… you guessed it, “Islamophobic”! Not all bad then.

    I can’t do links, but it’s in today’s “Jihad Watch daily digest”. I commend it to all cunters.

  16. Try having “Fucking Cuuuuuuunts” read out in court as the final line of a foul-mouthed,shameful rant following a drunken altercation in a pub. I was arrested,along with two of my associates on the way back from a mini-bus trip to Wetherby races. We’d had a few,and the details of my behaviour aren’t for the retelling. Anyhow,when we returned to go to the local magistrates court a month or so later,the arresting officer was reading out a description of my behaviour. Both him and the magistrates were actually openly grinning as it was read out…until we got to the “Fucking Cuuuuuuunts” part. The smile vanished from the Chief Magistrate’s face on hearing that. My friends always said,with some truth,I suspect,that our fines doubled with the reading of the “Cunt” word.

  17. Just remember to steal the cunt’s camera before the fracas though.

    The cunts are such cunts that they now get called cunts so often they need to record everything.

    • Right sneaky cunts them cyclists, they are fly cunts and know how to bait motorists into the trap. If in doubt, feed them to a log harvester before leaving the scene and check for handlebar mounted gear too.

  18. I must admit to becoming a little concerned about my use of the word, it’s become my default insult. Just for the sake of variety I’d like to diversify but nothing has quite the same impact. I like cockwomble though it has a slightly frivolous air to it and is as such lacking in menace. Arsehole and prick are good, especially when combined with fucking. Piece of shit can work, as can wankstain and spunk bubble. But in the end cunt or fucking cunt are hard to beat, especially if you say it to a wiminz, they really really don’t like it one little bit.

    • I must admit I’ve been cunting a hell of a lot lately.
      I’ve found myself saying “cuuunt” rather too loudly at every slight annoyance.

    • Did you have a touch of cunters diarrhoea nominating yesterday DF? If only there was an online vigilante who worked at a faith school that doubled up as a food bank. The vigilante one will be interesting if put up, cant say you don’t get variety on ISAC.

      • I did my back in a while ago,most of the time it’s perfectly fine,but every so often I’m stuck not really able to get on with much outside. I tend to do paperwork between thinking of things of which I strongly disapprove.

    • Yeah it’s great calling some cunt “Joey” or “you Deacon” and they don’t know what the fuck you are talking about. Got away with all sorts of shit with that, especially abusing women.

  19. ‘Cunt’ noun, consisting of 1 vowel and 3 consonants perfectly blended to form the most fantastically offensive word in the English Language.

    Regular use of the term can also give the orator an enormous sense of well being and is known to lower blood pressure levels.

    Taken from ‘CuntyMcCuntface Northern Street Dictionary’ 47th Edition.

    • Remember ex German football international Stefan Kuntz? Euro 96 commentators must have had a field day.

      • There is also a piece of scientific apparatus used for measuring the speed of sound called Kundt’s tube. Titters aplenty in my A level physics class.

      • Haha. There is also the epic philosopher Kant. Kant argued that the human mind creates the structure of human experience, that reason is the source of morality, that aesthetics arises from a faculty of disinterested judgment, that space and time are forms of human sensibility, and that the world as it is “in-itself” is independent of humanity’s concepts of it. I bet he never philosophied that he would be esteemed for being a Kant, the modern amusement of many a populist person, rather than being a cunt “in-itself” independent of him being Kant.

  20. Hold the front page.

    I have just listened to a programme on the Radio 4 of the so called BBC called ‘Where have all the Liberals Gone’. (I think)
    It was narrated by Nick Cohen of the Observer (yes you got that right) , that attacked the left, liberals, feminists and LBGT groups for their silence on Islamic oppression and wimmins rights. It had moderate Muslims on who get death threats for espousing reasonable views. It had an ex labour Muslim councillor on who was sacked by the party for bringing up wimmins rights.
    It made it very clear that Islamic conservatives suppress all expression and discussion of rights here and worldwide.
    There is hope.

    • Which may all be very true, but Nick Cohen is a litigious…person I cannot describe adequately without using the, er, c word, and whom I would like to give a massive… fluffy kitten.

  21. Five people responsible for 8,303 calls to the emergency services in one year.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-43293581

    Mainly for mental health issues, chronic pain, drug and or alcohol dependency.

    Criticised by MIND for failing to meet the needs of the individuals.

    Whilst I recognise that things are pretty tough for the NHS right now, (and in my humble opinion are not likely to improve until immigration numbers are substantially reduced), the NHS will never ever be in a position to cater for everyone’s needs just when it suits them.

    The five selfish people responsible for this huge amount of calls and subsequent waste of resources and man hours (can I still say man hours without being accused of being sexist) probably do not have the intelligence to realise this, and expect everything should be dropped just for them. They seem to forget that there are other people who have needs greater than their own.

    People need to take some responsibility for themselves and for their actions, and those who are genuinely and seriously ill should always take priority over those who may have been partially or fully to blame for their problems through poor life choices.

    I would also go as far as to say that priority should be given to those people who were born in this country and have made contributions into the system. Those who have not need to wait in line until something becomes available, or fuck off back to where you came from if they require urgent treatment.

    I totally accept that the problems with the NHS, lack of housing, lack of school places and social unrest is absolutely nothing to do with the 300,000 immigrants we let in every fucking year though. Yeah, right.

    Controversial? Couldn’t give a flying fuck really, my opinion to which I am currently entitled.

    • I am sure that if ambulances were sent out on a one-last-time “special” basis to these nuisance cases, there must be something in the on-board toolkit that would ensure that no further nuisance call-outs would be made…

      Upping the pain-killers, and for the alcos, there’s a drug that makes you pretty ill if you DO drink. A LARGE shot of that, with no warning, might sort things out.

  22. I’ve found that the optimum solution in mixed company is to use the word ‘Tuesday’ instead of ‘cunt’, based on the old phrase ” See you next Tuesday”. This works really well, as no Tuesday can understand what you’re on about. Try it – it’s fun, you bunch of Tuesdays.

    • Harry H Corbett used to get away with it all the time in Steptoe & Son.

      “You ain’t half a berk!”
      Rhyming slang
      “Berkshire hunt” = Cunt

    • Do you think The Tuesdays band (Norwegians finest), also used this approach? If so, I now have increased understanding and respect for their musical endeavours.

  23. A few of my all time favourite insults:

    Knob-jockey
    Fuckwitt
    Cuntbubble
    Arse-monkey
    Helmet-Feta
    Fucking skidmark

    • I would like to add one more. Fucktard. I dislike the original word, particular because cunts in America use it liberally.

      And because of its terrible association with people with whom low IQ is no fault of their own.

      But the reworked Fuck_Tard can be utilised at the very people who use *the other word. It is like a STAR Wars programme that neutralises weaponry, although in hindsight, this is a poor comparison, as that cunt Reagan spent billions on it, with nothing to show for it, while creating a crack epidemic and ironically singing “just say No”. What a fackin cunt ( in the immortal words of Dereck & Clive).

  24. On the 1.00 news magazine thingmabob on Radio 4 this afternoon they had an item about American publishers now using *sensitivity readers* to ensure the fucking writer hasn’t upset any snowflakes. The daft cunt interviewed said that she was a sensitivity reader because she had come from a *working and lower class* background. She was also black and had that typical arty-farty have a nice day voice so loved by the meja. Can you fucking believe it? Derek and Clive wouldn’t have stood a chance with wankers like that around

    • Cunt is in fact a wonderfully classless word.

      In my experience, very broadly used, both actively and passively…

  25. If you hate the word “cunt” then perhaps you picked the wrong website to visit and share your viewpoint

    Is a cunt is pro cunting and its usage of the word cunt is endorsed

  26. This cunting is worth it’s weight in cunts for the sheer pleasure of hearing Derek & Clive again. The cunts.

  27. Dear Sir,

    A thoroughly gripping peace of cunt journalism.

    I would like to highlight the increasingly combatative stasi cyclists and their inability to not behave like fascist cunts. As a “mod” and Vespa rider, I was riding over Richmond Bridge last year and as it was a beautiful day, I decided to not own the road (*filter/insurance company description) , but instead chill in the traffic jam. As I was stationary, with a delay of at least one minute. I momentarily took my phone out to change the northern soul album from Martha Reeves to Dobie Gray. As I was doing this, some cyclist cunt dressed like a tit (grown ups shouldn’t look like this) began to talk to me offering me advice about using my phone. Naturally, I styled it out, looking fly, and explained to him that he indeed looked and sounded like a cunt. I respectfully inquired whether he would like to offer me more advice but for us to disembark to the pavement. He declined, and said something comical, but as the cunt was dressed like such a mommy’s cunt, I couldn’t translate his whinning. The cunt then rudely decided to ride off.

    Because I had now organised further information detailing what a cunt he truly was. I decided to ride/filtering parrarel to the fat pig faced cunt. Clearly my hairdryer, more nibble wasp, was able to keep abreast of his location and ensure we would meet at the lights (it is true, timing is everything). As we met once more. I asked him if he had realised what a cunt he was, and again requested him to step up and off to the pavement, he declined but threatened to tell on me. Fortunately as a Vespa rider, it is essential to have various chains and locks to secure your vehicle. It also provides options when some aggressive people try to behave like cunts. I asked him whether he would like to joust, as it was such a beautiful day, but he declined saying he had to go home for tea.

    Four weeks later, I received a letter from the Met. Apparently our dalliance had been uploaded to a tricycle site for cunts who interfere and like to confront innocent people. I was a star apparently, receiving 1000 or so comments from various cycling mafia cunts, stating I should be lynched and spend 10 yrs in the clink. As I have a tiny ego and didn’t want the viewings to increase, I never saw the film (but I’m sure I played a convincing Jimmy from Quadraphenia. Thankfully the Police in their wisdom and search for the truth (probably hating cyclists more than scooter lads) said they didn’t agree with the cunt, or his need to video me, but despite the geezer looking like an offensive cunt, worst than a rocker (and to a mod I understood). I should remember to not take out my phone for whatever reason, as it’s illegal and I could find myself having trouble with da law.

    Because I always like to learn from each situation. I now ensure that wherever possible I converse with pig faced cunt cyclists wearing bodycams, hoping this maybe my opening into film and tv work.

    Regards

    • That’s probably the most accomplished cycle-cunting I have yet seen. Made my day. Thanks.

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