Captain Sensible [2]

Just seen Captain Sensible on the local news flogging a new The Damned reunion.

He’s still wearing that red beret and calling himself ‘Captain Sensible’. And wearing sunglasses indoors. I imagine because like Bongo and many others of his vintage, his eyes are like pissholes in the snow.

‘Raymond Burns’ is 63. Cunt. I’ll give you fucking happy talk.

Nominated by Mecha-Rigsby

46 thoughts on “Captain Sensible [2]

  1. I’ve seen a few ageing rockers live, it’s extremely depressing to watch an old man trying to act like he’s 17 still. I saw Peter Green some years ago with the splinter group and god I wish I hadn’t . He was shuffling around the stage and band mates kept having to prompt him. It was fuckin pitiful to think that Peter Green was once a good looking bloke with a great voice and a superb blues guitarist.
    I think Johnny Mar once said, rock music is a young mans game.

    • For the other side of the argument, I’m in my seventh decade and still write and record rock music. People my age have loads of experience and can still produce the music. Difference is that I know my physical limitations and don’t play live any more.

      I agree about Peter Green. He’s fucked. When I saw Splinter Group live first time, I couldn’t figure out which one was Peter. On the other hand, saw Cliff last year. 77 years old FFS and can still deliver the performance even when he’s just recovered from surgery!

      Seems to me the secret is knowing when and how to pace yourself.

      • Plenty of Cod Liver Oil is the secret, keeps the brain , heart and joints in order.

      • They must keep a defibrillator on standby for Stones concerts for Keef and co and bottled Himalayan mountain water purified through the arse crack of a meditating Sherpa reaching Nirvana. Not that Jagger is a diva or anything.

    • Mrs. Yank took me to see the Garbage/Blondie tour a few months back. Garbage opened and were fantastic. We really enjoyed their performance. I was very excited, though a little apprehensive, to see Blondie for the first time. Blondie hold a special place in my music collection because Parallel Lines was the first album I bought.

      Blondie was not good. Debbie Harry looked tired and fragile while trying to ‘boss it’ on stage. The drummer really got on my nerves by being completely over the top and the rest of them….meh. We gave it a shot, but left after about 5 songs none of which were close to the recorded versions. I got to see Blondie 20 years too late. Gutted. 🙁

    • It was John Squire who said the ‘young man’s game’ thing…
      Then he goes and re-forms The Stone Roses…

  2. Fuck me is this cunt still upright? I suppose they will be doing cutting edge punk stuff like ‘Happy Talk’
    There seems to be an army of the fuckers who were debatable as talented 40 years ago and are now creaking round the circuit.
    I saw 9 Below Zero as support to Squeeze last October. Loved them in the day but little to offer now, although they are actual musicians.

  3. The cunt looks like the product of some weird genetics breeding programme involving Savile and Izzard.

    Cunts wear berets..

    Che Guevara
    Eddie Izzard
    Frank Spencer
    The French..

  4. Brexit scare Day 10. This from so called BBC website.

    ‘A special fund to prepare farmers for Brexit would in some cases be “income support for super rich”, an MP says.

    Newport West’s Paul Flynn sits on the Commons’ environment committee but opposes a recommendation in a report on how leaving the EU could impact the food trade.’

    For those of you who don’t know:

    This old cunt said the referendum should be treated like the BoatyMCBoatface vote.
    His constituents voted strongly Leave.
    The EU agri fund pays out on land area owned, regardless of use so it currently overwhelmingly benefits the super rich.
    Farmers as a whole voted Leave.
    Flynn is a fucking useless constituency MP.

    This old cunt Flynn knows better than the peasants though.

    • This desperation to remain suggests to me that vested interests may include a “payroll”. Can’t think of any other reason.

    • Off topic I know, but I had to google this cunt and I’m still non the wiser. Looks like izzards evil twin (clearly got the lions share of testosterone in utero). Either way, al jabeeb has made me do some hardcore vomiting this morning… income support for the super rich ? Oh, you mean the CAP. Also, that yam yam mong defending Sir Brendan “deepthroat” Cox? dismissing his Peter Sutcliffe impression as if it was all part of consensual foreplay… wasn’t that the same cunt who was frothing at the stink trench the other week about the presidents club ? The stench of the lib left hypocrisy never ceases to amaze me.

  5. Back in the good old days (1960s) they’d be dead or back stacking shelves by the age of 27. It saved their legacies being trashed, but not so good for their egos or bank balances.

  6. Surely the cuntiest name has to be The Edge. What does it even mean? And he wears that cunty woolly thing and knows three chords. Wanker.

  7. Old rockers never die…..unfortunately.

    Captain Cockwash should have done the decent thing and joined the 27 Club. Saved us all from that anthem to banality “Happy Talk.”. Bet the crumbly old Cunt wouldn’t be so keen to talk about things that I’d like to do.
    Fuck him.

  8. Captain Sensible is to music what the bomb of Hiroshima was to fucking landscape gardening. This cunt has that fucking Jimmy Saville look about him. Now the fucking ball knurler has decided it is time to infest another generation with his fuck knuckle music………music thats a fucking joke. All in all this cunting is well deserved, some people never know when to fuck off or to stay fucked off.

    • Some of the early damned was alright but I agree with others about his happy talk and solo album nonsense

      Also is looking like Jimmy Saville a crime?! well it is now of course lol My gran had the uncanny likeness of Jim will fix it not joking

  9. Off topic, but time is a cunt.
    When youve got hours to kill or you have to listen to some old cunt telling you the same story they’ve told you 7 times already time takes forever to pass by.
    When youv’e got loads to do and you even get up early to give yourself time, it flies by like a cunt.
    Time is a cunt.

    • I remember many occasions at work where I had a problem and could sit for hours and not solve it, and go home with a huge fucking burden on my shoulders, then next morning go back in and have it all wrapped up in 15 minutes. Many times.

    • I remember when this was all fields. Have I told you? This was all fields once. I remember when a pound was a pound. You could have a night out, meal and buy a house with one.

  10. The Damned came to my town a few months back. I’ve never seen them live, but took a punt supporting their current Pledge campaign for a new album, so I thought I’d go along. Tickets were $30. I clicked on the link and tried to order a couple. Each ticket came out as $68. I could not figure out WTF was going on aside from those cunts Ticketmaster being up to their old tricks. A greater than 100% markup is a stretch though, even for them. I cancelled the order and figured I’d call the venue’s box office and get tickets there at face value or close to it. Nope, that was a waste of time. The lady in the box office told me “the band has a special arrangement with Ticketmaster for this concert” to the extent the venue itself did not have nor could they sell any tickets for a show they themselves were hosting!!!!!

    To me that makes The Damned fucking cunts. If they’d decided to dance with the devil and enter into an agreement with those cunts Ticketmaster in order to make more money, then why not just make the ticket face value $68 or something close to it? Why draw attention to the fact you are completely and utterly ripping people off? Ticketmaster can always fuck off and now, so can The Damned. Cunts.

    • Remember where you called up to reserve tickets, always some available even after a few days release date, send off a cheque and either the tickets were sent to you or collected at the venue.

      From memory tickets not usually in excess of £5 a ticket. Alice Cooper (Welcome to my Nightmare) circa 1975 £2, The Who at Charlton circa 1976 £4. Plus many more.

      Happy days.

  11. As he has aged, Captain Sensible is now the doppelganger of that pooch-loving, fudgepacking, crossdresser, Paul O’Grady.

    Never seen the pair in the same photo together. Google them; the likeness is uncanny.

  12. I said Captain.

    He said wot.


    We just need Joe Dolce to make an appearance to provide the perfect storm of cunts!

  13. Here’s what cunts the James-free Damned were… Drummer, Rat Scabies got into a scuffle in a hotel foyer… About five blokes set upon Rat and gave him a good kicking… His bandmates, Vanian, Sernsible etc were there, but they just stood by and watched their mate take a severe beating… Rat never forgave therm… He said ‘You don’t expect strangers to intervene, but when your mates watch you getting your head kicked in…’


  14. A de-cunting for Crosby Stills Nash and Young?
    Yes, they spout progressive bullshit, yes they sing hippy bollocks, and yes they all had the west coast hippy slapper that was Joni Mitchell….

    But apparently Bob Geldof once laughed at them an called them hippies backstage and they battered him… Nice one, lads…

  15. I saw The Damned a couple of weeks back. And to be honest they were pretty good, and the Capt takes the piss out of himself as much as anything. BUT what cunted me off were the pathetic ‘Grandad/Grandmother’ punks who made up the bulk of the audience.

    It may have been cool to wear a studded jacket and bullet belt when you were 21 and had a 28″ waist but not when you’re 60, fat and with no hair no teeth and wrinkled to fuck.

    Old punks still dressing up like it was ’77….utter utter cunts!

    • A bit liike those cunts in their 40s and 50s who go to Gallagher (either of them) or Stone Roses gigs… Stupid walk, Beatle hairdo, tracksuit top, fake Liam style accent and attitude… Proper cunts…

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