Paul Hollywood [4]

Paul Hollywood is a cunt.

That smug, fake-tanned, uptight wanker. You bash the folks for decorating their stuff with non-edible elements, then make a fucking cake with PINE CONES on it? Stuff that down your gob and up your soggy bottom.

Nominated by Schleiermacher

54 thoughts on “Paul Hollywood [4]

  1. God – I am so sick of swallowing snot! Fuck knows what women and the GBTQXYZ community get out of swallowing spunk? And yes, Paul Hollywood is indeed a monstrous fucking cunt!

    BTW Cunters, watch out for ‘Snot Swapping Cunts’, my latest venture into the adult filum market. Had a great part lined up for Dick Fiddler, but seems he’s gone awol…currently negotiating to get the great Willie Stroker instead.

  2. A prize cunt. As was/is his cunt of a father. The apple don’t fall far from the tree. A real truism in this case. CUNT

  3. No cookery cunt will ever come close to the hideous cunt Wallace. Hollywood is a cunt of course but nowhere near the odious grinning reptile Wallace who has no talent, the personality of Reggie Kray in a bad mood and all the grace and charm of a charging rhino with explosive diarrhea.
    A cunt ox .

    • Oh yes. Greg fucking Wallace. What an utter cunt he is. Up there with Blair and Bonio as a completely talentless, obnoxious, self regarding wanker. Hollywood pales into insignificance, orange tan and all, in comparison. Although still a cunt.

  4. Have a gut full of the lot of them on Christmas TV
    It’s just been Baking and Benders ….
    And all the shit in between
    Cunts the lot of them
    And Happy New Year
    To all fellow cunters

  5. A massive cunt of Eric Pickles sized proportions as is any cooking show. When did something so mundane become essential TV?. A quick cunting for ITV”s new show The School for Stammerers , what a c..c..c..cunt.

  6. I’d love to see them do a “Great Celebrity Mug Off” series.

    This is where you arrange to meet a faux sleb – such as Hollycunt here – in a cunt bar/restaurant (hopefully in full view of other faux sleb cunts – who invariably drink/eat in the same overpriced, pretentious cunt places) with hidden cameras, etc., and as soon as they order the most expensive drink on the menu (only cos they’re not paying – the cunts) you ring them up and “mug them off” by telling them that you’re doing a no show.

    The “icing” is then being able to watch the mutt on their faces as they have to pay for said drink, and then the ability to shame the cunt if they don’t leave a tip.

    Hollycunt wouldn’t leave a tip, I’ve heard the scouse get is tighter than a Jewish Yorkshireman named McTavish!

    • Excellent idea RWAC 😂😂
      And the best bit is you’ve got a never ending supply of faux sleb Cunts to humiliate!!

  7. Just seen a picture of Michael Douglas in the paper, Christ, his old man at 101 and Deadpool regular looks in better nick. Must be like porking Skelator for ZJ.

  8. He’s a cook? I thought the cunt was a film critic or something. Never seen anything with him in it and would hazard a guess that I’m not missing much (apart from loud displays of gratuitous cuntitude).
    A nonentity…

  9. In the local shop this morning and clocked The Grauniad’s front page. Something like “20,000 British men are suspected child abusers”
    Bet their definition of “British” is different to mine…

    • To divert attention away from peacefuls it’s the only time the grauniad use British to mean white working or middle class. I’d include Syrian, Ethiopian, Persian immigrants as British. Because we all know where the problem lies with rape gangs

      • It’s a full on barrel of shite hoodwink job!!
        20,000 British men??
        There’s plenty of white Cunts in there but if you looked at the population In their ethnic groups x
        numbers present in the U.K. x crimes committed ….the peaceful people would easily top the table!!
        Who the fuck do they think their kidding?

  10. Referred to as the good old days……
    I’m not sure they would put it on TV but I for one would definitely like to have a few stocks around the place, maybe the odd public flogging, if it’s a success maybe we could gently introduce the odd hanging or two…😂
    I bet the fuckin crime rate would plummet……..

    • The words “Lord” and “Adonis” have just sprung to mind for some incomprehensible reason…

  11. Paul Hollywood with his face like a mound of uncooked dough with a sprinkling of pubes from an AIDS victim. The Scouse accent is bad enough but coming from a ham planet cunt like this it really is unforgivable. Middle aged women love him and it’s been known he makes their sponges go a bit moist. Please Paul just go away quietly

  12. HM Govt are going to piss good money after bad by giving it to commercial channels to provide “better” children’s programming.

    By “better” they mean to promote more “diversity” – because the UK is totally bereft of being force fed “diversity” from every fucking angle from there only “multicultural” families and “peacefuls” celebrating Xmas in advertising, to soap operas where normality = only gay or trans couples with husband and wife units being reserved for “peaceful” families (as they’re sensitive to the fact that “peacefuls” like the LGBTQ sector of society as they do Xmas).

    The only saving grace is that it’s coming out of the ABBC’s arse pocket (which is already “diverse”, “multicultural” and “peaceful” enough as it is).

    Cunts!

  13. Celebrity cooks, isn’t the truth cooking shows are cheap to make and schedule filling dross.

    BBC the bastion of quality TV so we keep being told so we cough up the TV tax.

    Cooking, cheap quizzes, wanky antique (junk) show, more cooking, make a mint out of some poor cunts repossessed Home show, wanky slag Brexit and trump of show (both done in as many wanky shows as possible). Panel show with panelist’s from all the wanky wank listed.

    Flagships:

    Eastendees which must be one of the most socially destructive pieces of broadcasting ever,

    Strictly cum watching some fit dancer dragging a celeb cook around.

    Mrs Browns cunts.

    Whatever wank can be used as a vehicle for talentless dyke Perkins

    Fucking cuntery

    • Before I stopped watching the fucking beeb, we used to play BBC bingo. Put on a ‘comedy’ or panel show, and see how long it was before you could tick off the usual targets. It used to be Farage, ukip voters, and Daily Mail (paper and/or readers). Now, it’s ‘ain’t Trump a cunt’,’pro Brexit voters are cunts’,’Far right/alt right bigotry’ and the Daily Mail. Anything of true comedic value has long been rung out of these subjects, so it is just pure agenda with them, and you could be pretty sure of a full house within three minutes of the opening credits. All from a broadcaster that is supposed to be impartial. I wouldn’t give a fuck, but I have to pay for this shit, or risk legal action. Nice…..

  14. Isn’t that the promo photo for the cunts new channel 4 show? One man One cake? A wonderfully tedious pile of brain cancer where sleb’s battle it out to see who can fit the largest cake up their soggy bottom’s. UP NEXT WEEK Elton John tries his luck with a replica of princess died’s wedding cake.. will he do all 7 tiers ? Watch this space.

    • I too have a certain respect for the fact he clearly knows he is an absolute cunt but owns it. You could probably translate most of what he says as “I am a total bellend cunt” and it wouldn’t change his delivery. Smuggest cookery cunt award IMHO goes to James Martin – the butter faced turd.

  15. Total smug prick like most of the male cooking tv cunts, can tell he loves the smell of his own farts.

    Only ever used to watch Delia as she was such a dirty bit of posh totty. Looks like shes been hitting the cocaine diet of late and is looking awfully thin and gaunt now.

  16. My favourite cook show was the one with that Worrell Thompson cunt.

    The one that was on at ten o’clock one night on ITV where he showed you how to eat better for less by getting free ingredients from Tesco.

    Note to Greg Wallyass, That’s how you eat better for less, you stupid cunt.

  17. I’m actually waiting on Wallace coming out to help the peacefuls get rid if bacon with the use of some cancer scare story or similar.

    They would love to destroy the traditional British menu. Cunts.

  18. Much angst being aimed at TV cooking shows and for the most part, I’d agree they’re banal tripe. If you’re looking for an antidote to these vacuous offerings, please sample the hilarious piss take series, Posh Nosh. Here’s a link to get you started:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Odc73HTJScc

    You’re welcome.

  19. Could I just give my congratulations to Agent Adonis. Mission not quite completed yet but a great hissy fit to comfirm that the remoanabores are doing a great job for the Leave side. Only he could make himself look an even bigger cunt than we know he is. I wouldn’t have liked to be in the nursery when he was a mini cunt, probably would’ve broken my neck on the toys being hoyed out of his 4 poster cot. Still maybe he’ll console himself in the crotch of a Polish rent boy while they’re still cheap. Poncey little fuck stick.

    • I don’t know what’s the best way to describe him… former Blairite cock cleaner OR ex Liberal Democrat. Has he been suitably cunted yet?

    • Not so fast…Adonis’s resignation & accompanying letter is a clever Remainer ploy to create the impression that Theresa May’s version of Brexit is “Hard” when in fact it is anything but! The Brexit Government is currently pursuing is about as “Soft” as it’s possible to get and not fall foul of the Trade Description Act.

      Adonis says May & UKIP/Farage policies are identical, which is so far from the truth it can only be a George Orwell sized BIG LIE. Adonis (and co-conspirators) is out to convince you that genuine Brexit is being delivered, so all you Brexiteers can stop worrying and relax, when in fact the opposite is true:

      May’s Brexit = paying £40billion, remain in the Single Market and the Customs Union until the Irish border question is solved to the satisfaction of Ireland /EU /UK and the DUP, which is likely to be never…so the same as remaining, no third party trade deals allowed, freedom of movement /immigration to continue uncontrolled, and ECJ to have jurisdiction within U.K. for 8 more years at least…

      That is so far from the UKIP/Farage position it’s enough to make a fucking cat laugh!

      Could even be a conspiracy cooked up between May Government and the Remoaners, for all I know. Adonis outburst is clearly designed to reassure Leavers that Brexit is on track and will be delivered unless Adonis, Heseltine, Clegg, Clarke, Flabbott, etc get their way, which we are led to believe they can’t. But they’re already getting their way, aren’t they?… Smoke & mirrors.

      Brexit in name only. Brexit means Remain. Worse in fact, imho!

      • Correct. I couldn’t work out who would be the bigger spastic, Baldrick for saying May was just appeasing the UKIP voters, the beeb for reporting it without question, or the stupid cunts who would believe it. Unelected Blairite crony, career cunt.

      • I have often wondered what would happen in the event that the people are betrayed by the politicals. Would there be civil war? Would there be riots in the street? Just what would the people do?

        The British people,( and I refer to the indigenous population, not the “Noo Brish” complete with magical carpets and 3 wives.) are now too apathetic and muddled to kick off in any big way.

        I can see however, that the formation of a patriotic wave may be formed and with the tactics of the provisional IRA, may set about a war of some kind targeting politicians en masse.

        We have learned over the years, that terrorism always pays, and great gains can be made for a few thousand dead.

        look at the cunts Adams and McGuiness. Having organised the murder of countless hundreds, they gain status in Government, are paid handsomly for their treachery, and are lauded by luvvies and fuckwits without the sense to piss in a straight line.

        Either way, I see a very troubled and anxious time ahead of us.

        I regret to say though, that Merkel and Macron will write the final pages of this fiasco, as old blighty sinks in the cesspit of liberalism and socialism. Two thousand years to build a great nation, and only two decades of corrupt , lying and deceitful politicians to destroy it.

        Happy new year cunters,

      • 17.4 millon people won’t forget if they shit on us. I’ll be going ‘shopping’ for a new telly if that’s what it takes. Cunts

      • Eternal vigilance will be required if anything remotely resembling a genuine Brexit is to be achieved. Personally believe it’s already irretrievably lost anyway, but those of a more optimistic stripe may wish to differ. Either way, Remoaner cunts are already using every trick in the book, have been from day one, fair means or foul, none of it makes any odds to them, they inhabit a truth and morality free zone, where all is fair in their war to crish the will of the British people and see right their lords and masters in the Fourth Reich.

        Btw, had the misfortune of catching a few seconds of David Beckham on telly just now, a deeply unpleasant reminder of what an astronomical cunt he is. And boo-hoo, millennials won’t be rich before they’re 60, selfish fucking baby boomers and Brexit no doubt to blame.

      • “From the proletarians nothing is to be feared. Left to themselves, they will continue from generation to generation and from century to century, working, breeding, and dying, not only without any impulse to rebel, but without the power of grasping that the world could be other than it is.”
        ― George Orwell, 1984

  20. If I could rewind the clock I’d love to see a Saturday Kitchen style program hosted by Keith Floyd and Fanny Adams, the 3 guest stars would be Oliver Reed, James Hunt and George Best.

    It would go out live and they’d have all spent a couple of hours in the Green Room beforehand, the first dish would be Spotted Dick.

    I’m pretty certain that would be enough material for the basis of a highly entertaining first episode.

    Can’t imagine ABBC running with it though!

  21. Some cunt trying to achieve Grenfellian lottery winner bank account status in Manchester?

    Wonder what the residents demands shall be or if they will be entertained?

    Probably caused by a white guy who is in custody awaiting court next week after leaving a chip pan unattended.

    • Just Googled the cunt in images. There is a snap of him shaking Charlie Jug Ears’ hand looking like Miyagi from the 1984 Karate Kid film.

      I hope for his sake he learns to wax on/wax off in some 6’7″ tall, homo cellmate’s direction.

  22. Off topic slightly…. I’m hearing Peter Kaye has Leukemia….. and this is the second time, remember when he lost some weight a few years back..,

    I know he’s milked his act but if it’s true and it’s a good source that I’ve got this from then it’s sad all the same.

    Really really funny guy in his day.

    • Funny funny guy.

      He is repetitive, but I laugh like fuck at him, so……….

      Max and Paddy is underrated. One of his best and Carshare is brilliant.

      Yep, Pete gets the double thumbs up from me.

  23. Nearly 2018 and this cunt has a goatee.

    Yeah he’s a cunt, and so is any other cunt with a goatee.

    Fuckin goatees…… Ffs……

  24. The trouble is the kind of people who voted Brexit aren’t the kind of people who go around setting fire to buildings and looting shops.
    However, they are the kind of people who have military experience and, through football hooliganism, have experience of street fighting and evading the police. An interesting combination. It all depends on how angry they are gonna get.

    • Do you think the remoaners will take to the streets if the people who voted leave do?

      If not who gets the shit kicked out them instead?

      If there is a break down in democracy, does that void all laws and everything else that was established through those same democratic systems?

      The police would never cope with 17 million odd disgruntled people. Is this why there has been a recent army recruitment drive I wonder?

      Still don’t think they could deal with it without firing live rounds on the public.

      I’m sure the rest of the world looking in would approve of a country setting its military forces on its people because they didn’t want to deliver the outcome decided through a democratic vote.

  25. Fat orange cheating cunt,hope his wife takes him for millions the silver haired tangeringe coloured vain Mar Berry shagging cunt

Comments are closed.