Christmas Chefs


Chefs at Xmas. They’ll all be at it soon -kitchens that look like a grotto, a dozen friends and the token black everything perfect with Bing or Nat singing in the background and to complete the merriment a seasonal cook book, available at all good book retailers, or your local charity shop boxing day, or poundland -buy one get ten free- come Easter.

Never do a good recipe for reindeer stuffed with assorted Santa and Elf sweetmeats do they?

Oh fucking joy unbound.


Nominated by: King Cunt

3 thoughts on “Christmas Chefs

  1. A seasonal cunting…..this site really does have everything 🙂

    Most of these cunts are ‘ding chefs’!

    Pretending they can actually cook whilst pretending to be temperamental to make themselves look vitally important right up unto the time the microwave goes ding and the shop bought frozen stuff still comes out lukewarm despite clear instructions. Anymore than 2 orders and their eyes roll back in their head like they have been asked to decipher the Enigma code! Thick cunts the lot of em who are hopefully on minimum wage…..which would still be far more than they deserve.

  2. I’m having a bit of Rudolf the red rare reindeer… after all he had no job after Santa was arrested by Operation Weeting.

  3. I had the privilege of learning to cook from Zlatko Antic former cook of Marshal Tito’s private guard on the island of brijun Croatia.
    Gordon Ramsey is fuck all compared to him! Cunt used to throw his clogs at me accross the kitchen!
    This stopped after I got pissed off and chucked them in an industrial pressure cooker.
    Any way the point is making the best from the worse, I have made some rather nice meals out of some rather horrible shit.
    I went to marco tos pot blanc (or whites) restaurant/hotel close to where I live to a conference, the coffee was fucking awful, at lunchtime a waiter badgered me to eat, and honestly I said,
    His stock pots are salty shit, your coffee is awful, im fucked if I’m putting that in my mouth
    Celebrity chief’s are cunts because of the products they endorse, it doesn’t have to be some fucking bizarre ingredient found up a jaks arse, chances are the shit under your foreskin looks and tastes the same l

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