Ailing MPs

A gentle, RIP cunting please, for those “honourable” members of parliament who really do feel they are a special case and the usual rules of employment don’t apply to them.

These thoughts are bought on by the death yesterday of 84 year old Labour MP, Paul Flynn, who, by his own admission, had been bedridden for some months. He has been described as a “principled” man, yet it seems his principles didn’t stop him from claiming his £77,000 a year to do a job he was apparently physically incapable of doing.

Mr Flynn is by no means alone in continuing to get paid for political work long after he was incapable of doing it – so many MPs of all parties seem to keep their seats only to expire “after a long illness”.

Mr. Flynn was going to stand down when “the time was right” and he was a Remainer who wanted a second referendum. Sadly, like so many of them he believed rules were for other people.

Nominated by W. C. Boggs

Terry Christian

What a über cunt this nasally borderline Salfordian is.

On GMTV the other today (15/02/19) he was pitched with Tim Martin the ‘Brexit Suppprting’ founder of Witherspoon’s.

My first thought was ‘how in the name of Hong Kong Fucking Fui
have we reached a point where some shite fucking has been cretin who’s major claim to fame was presenting The Turd is debating a self made multi-millionaire businessman whos built a chain of 900 pubs, employs 37000 staff with net revenue of £1.6bn?’

Turns out Christian, who’s achieved ermmmm, none of the above,tweeted some shite about if you were on a plane and 52% of the passengers voted to turn the engines off and the rest didn’t, who should be first to receive the parachutes, fucking bla bla blllllllaaaaa.

Apparently in Terry Fuckwits brain this is a legitimate comparison.

Apparently he knows this to be because he has a friend who employs people and he said it’s disasterous.

Apparently his savings have reduced in value by 18% since the Brexit vote.

As is ever the case with these fucking lefty morons who’ve only ever employed Bratislav to do the gardening he wouldn’t let Tim Martin get a word in (the interview was done over a live link with Terry Fuckwit in the studio).

It’s not all bad though, just as the Mancunian fucking gobshite paused for breath back came Tim loud and clear.

‘Terry is to economics what Tiger Woods is to monogamy’.

Interesting though, isn’t it, that Terry Fuckwit, champagne socialist that he is, seems to suggest it’s ok to discriminate on the grounds of the way you voted and ties that in with a schoolboy analogy about crashing a plane.

What an insufferable piece of shit.

Nominated by CuntyMcCuntface


Terry fucking Christian.

Haven’t seen this pan-faced, smug, talentless cumstain receive a well overdue nomination, so I believe it’s time.

Mercifully we don’t see much of the cunt these days, but tis a small consolation knowing that this fuckhead still walks and breathes under the same sky as us all; you can’t uninvent something, not even Terry cunting Christian.

I doubt I need to write more as the mere mention of this wank rag should make your blood fucking curdle.

Nominated by Little Lord Cuntleroy

David Beckham [8]

A mega-rich cunting for Sirless David Beckham who clearly believes that being rich and famous puts him above the law.

Caught doing 59mph in a 40 zone, Beckham is too important to pay an £80 fine and take the points on his licence. He’d rather employ a loophole lawyer at £10,000 a day to get him off. How? Well, it seems the penalty notice must be issued in 14 days and the police took 15. So after wasting 5 hours of the court’s time, he walks away scot free. What a egotistical self important little shit!

But never mind. Because now the bugger has been nicked for using a mobile phone while driving. Needless to say he’s contesting it with his £10,000 a day lawyer raking in a bit more dosh in the process.

Still, that should put another nail in the coffin of his knighthood with a bit of luck. Lady Victoria will not be pleased.

What an arrogant insignificant little cunt this man is!

Nominated by Dioclese

Riley Dennis

‘It takes all sorts to make a world’, the old saying goes, and generally I can relate to that. It’s just that sometimes, someone whose outlook is a bit, well, odd, intrudes on my consciousness and I start to wonder.

Let me introduce Riley (aka Justin) Dennis, a self-styled male to female transgender activist and feminist, who ‘identifies’ as a ‘non-binary woman’ and lesbian. Fair enough, it’s okay with me if that’s his/her/hem’s (whatever) choice. However it seems that s/he’s not content just to get on with things. S/he wants to dictate the terms upon which everyone else must relate to him/her/hem (oh ffs!).
Check out this example, in which s/he claims that dating ‘preferences’ can be discriminatory.

Now Riley’s discourse is a bit hard to follow, but I think the gist’s this; you’re discriminating if you won’t date a transgender person purely on the grounds that they’re trans, rather than on the basis of the qualities that they demonstrate as an individual. Got that? Well I’ll grant that there’s a certain logic to the argument, but in return, I must be granted the right to disagree.

Here’s the thing Riley. Stop obsessively over-analysing everything when it’s very simple. I don’t give a fuck how you and those like you live your lives, or what you identify as. In return, stop spouting more ‘identity politics’ b/s. Give it a rest, and stop trying to project your hang-ups onto everyone else.

Society hasn’t somehow conditioned me over the years to develop an unconscious bias towards you. It’s not discriminatory behaviour because I won’t buy into your agenda and acknowledge this supposed ‘bias’. Think about this the other way around. I can like a transgender person on the basis of their qualities as an  individual, without being physically attracted to that person. I like a woman to have a fanny in her pants as opposed to a dick. That doesn’t make me ‘transphobic’; it means that I don’t fancy you. It really is about preference; it’s my choice, just as it’s yours to wear a dress. If I may paraphrase the old ‘Stonewall’ ad; ‘most people are straight. Get over it’.

Nominated by Ron Knee


Bubbles. Oh, there is a Cuntbubble on here. But we all live in bubbles don’t we cunters. When you think about it. Groupthink. That idea?

The most suffocating bubble is of course the cult bubble. Scientology say where people are coerced or brainwashed into thinking what the group believes. The bubble. The metaphor actually fits perfectly because you can see the person in the bubble (it’s transparent) but you cannot communicate with them.

Are YOU in a bubble? Is it wrapped around your brain? Are you allowed to speak? Not even a squeak? Are you all singing from the same hymn sheet? Yes bubbles from the Holy Book. Remember the non-conformist conscience? They all rejected ‘strong drink’. ‘Bubbly’ come to think. So they ‘conformed’ in that sense. More a party line than a bubble.

The modern atheist bubble A horrible bubble this. Emits a hiss. They don’t know how they came to exist. Witness ‘Hitch’. Trolls on the internet. ‘Bubbles’ by Millais. A work of art turned into an advert.

CAPITALISM. The capitalist bubble mutates into little economic bubbles. Popping up all the time. So destructive. In fact you could argue that the biggest bubble in the world is the capitalist one. Suffocating the world.

‘Bubbles’ Michael Jackson’s chimp. Like a nightmarish imp. Presented to Japanese dignitaries….as though.. from the Evolutionary bubble. The Modern Art bubble. Fucking Horribubble. Full of pride, insolence, impudence. Terrible to live in a bubble reader-to know EXACTLY 100% what’s coming next, to always know, to always get, the talk you expect. Like the Thought Police in your head. The Psychobabble bubble. Babbling big words. Self  actualization. What does it actually mean? Infantile babbling has truly more meaning. They are attempting to communicate at least.

Bubble wrap. Protects the contents of the box. But you’ve got to think outside the box. To get outside of your bubble. So a paradox. Bubblegum. You must keep shtum. Keep your mouth shut (in the bubble). Keep your gob shut. Like a gobstopper in your mouth. Stopping your mouth. From fear. Like in North Korea. Like ‘Kim’. The bubble is him. Like Buzz Light year. A bubble round his head. A bubblehead. Atop his bulbous neck. Above his people. And yes the Trump bubble. And the Nuclear bomb. And if both bubbles collide one huge blast and the world will be gone. There’ll be a bubble bath. If you’ll excuse the pun.

You know cunters the Nuclear Family has been blown to bits. By the Materialist bubble. Like a wrecking ball or wrecking bubble. And the main reason why millennials climb into bubbles. To feel less troubled.

Religious bubbles. The Islamic bubble so dynamic-‘it can go anywhere because it came from nowhere’. But careers around bumping into other bubbles. The Buddhist bubble. A huge big one this. And very old. Squatting over great swathes of Asia. Eternally hanging around. I am in the Catholic bubble I readily admit. We all live in a bubble of belief.

Nominated by Miles Plastic