Lynx Deodorant

 

I can’t bear to breathe in this shite. Every time I smell it, I feel as if my nose has been viciously assaulted. It makes me heave. Anyone over the age of 15 who wears this needs to be sectioned and attended to by the men in white coats. Why would anyone want to smell like a sweaty year 8 boy’s changing room anyway? The adverts depict a daft bloke intensely spraying himself in this shite while he is surrounded by a load of wimmin all clucking round him. What a load of cobblers. This shite may as well be called ‘human repellent’ because when one chooses to wear it, they won’t have anyone within a five mile radius of them. Lynx is an abomination and whoever continues to produce it is a cunt.

Nominated by, Jayniño

 

Richard Branson [11]

A cunting for Virgin Atlantic and the bearded, grinning, hippy cunt Branson.

‘Virgin Atlantic is to stop working with the Home Office on forcible deportations from the UK of people deemed to be illegal immigrants.
The British airline says it has informed the government of its decision, saying it was “in the best interest of our customers and people”.
It comes amid concern over the removal of Windrush generation migrants and LGBT asylum seekers.’

These cunts have made their money out of the Windrush fuck up so are withdrawing from deportations. And of course LBGTXCFSZ gets a mention as if we are turfing out planeloads of Eddie Izzards on a daily basis. Look at us! We are so right-on and caring!

Can this organisation, with it’s subsidy driven sectors and it’s repulsive figurehead get any more despicable? Probably. The cunts.

Nominated by Cuntstable Cuntbubble

Womens tennis

I don’t know if Womens tennis has been cunted before and if it hasn’t it’s about fucking time it was.

I like to watch a good MENS tennis match but what the women serve up is absolute fucking dross. Thankfully Gigantor Serena Uppity Williams got a kicking in the final by the Kraut Kerber. Get this tho, 1 hour and five fucking minutes!!! Fortunately for the punters who no doubt had shelled a kings ransom for the privilege of watching the winner pick up £2.25 million notes and runner-up £1.25 same as the men got to see Djokovic and Nadal finish of from the night before.

Not only that but the first semi between Anderson and Isner went on for 6 and half fucking hours. Love it or loathe it you have to admit that is some going. So what about tarts tennis then, I’ve no doubt that any of them would struggle to face up to a game against a low ranked man or even a good wheel chaired man.

The money they get is fucking embarrassing and if they have got to continue to pay this stupid money they should at least make them help tidy up the place afterwards and help with doing the fucking dishes or something. Robbing cunts.

Nominated by Kendo Nag

Justine Greening [2]

EMERGENCY CUNTING – The lovely, delectable Justine Greening is calling for a second EU referendum.

Three options. Option 1- Theresa May’s “fudged deal”, Option 2- Leave with No Deal, Option 3 (you’ve guessed it) is to Remain in the EU.

Well Justine, you stupid bitch we have ALREADY voted, and we (the majority) voted to LEAVE so absolutely no need for a second vote. Article 50 has been triggered, and we are leaving. As the EU threatened us initially “once article 50 has been triggered it cannot be reversed and there is no going back” (unless it looks like you are not sure and then perhaps it can be reversed).

To cite a game show we were told that a Deal (means we stay) or a No Deal (means we leave). No third alternative.

As in another game show to quote Anne Robinson (in the event of No Deal) suggest we tell the EU quite simply that you can Fuck right off, and “that you leave with nothing”.

If only we had someone in government willing to step up to the plate and tell these EU cunts what they can do. After all, its only our fucking country at stake.

I cannot put into words how much I hate our politicians for what they are doing to this country and to my (and other peoples) mental health.

Cunts.

Nominated by Willie Stroker

Computer Game Addicts

If you have an unhealthy interest in computer games, you are not an addict. No, you’re an oxygen-stealing, waste of DNA cunt. Switch off your console, talk to people, get a girlfriend and get a job. If you want to get battlefield experience, join the Armed Forces. That said, they tend not to employ cunts.

Games developers are also cunts. These people are undoubtedly talented, but if they are diverted their energies into curing cancer or solving the world’s ills, we’d all be happier.

That computer gaming is now classified as an addiction is another sign of how snowflake cunts are dragging society down the pan.

CUNTS!

Nominated by Sgt Maj Cunt