Tim Martin


Wetherspoons boss, Tim Martin, reckons that shutting pubs in the current crisis is ‘over the top’. Martin told Sky: ‘Supermarkets are very, very crowded. Pubs are much less crowded. There’s hardly been any transmission of the virus within pubs and I think it’s over the top to shut them.”

Well, Tim, I think you’re a cunt. The Chief Medical Officer has said that pubs are a breeding ground for the virus, bit you reckon there’s more danger to be found at the supermarket. Well people have to eat. They don’t have to swill beer.

Martin also said that he would take the opportunity to catch the coronavirus under the right conditions, adding: ‘If someone offered me the opportunity now to have it under supervised conditions, I think I’d probably take it because your chances are very, very good.’

During the Brexit debate, I read a lot of his stuff and even heard him speak at a Brexit Party rally and he was talking a lot of sense. Now he’s talking utter bollocks. So I hope that he gets his wish and catches the virus. Perhaps that might make him take it just a little more seriously.

Nominated by Dioclese

96 thoughts on “Tim Martin

  1. Trouble with shutting pubs is the alcohol will disappear out of supermarkets faster than the bog rolls now. The days of a quiet drink at home are over for a while.

  2. In fairness, wetherspoons carry a decent selection of spirits.
    On many occasions I must have drunk enough to make my blood uninhabitable, and I can certaintly confirm my body’s relectance to make use of it.

  3. Wtf is going in ?
    This scabby little virus has a mortality rate of between 0.7 and 4% . Ffs SARS was about 30%.
    There’s more to this than we know. Why threaten the entire world’s economy for a virus that just isn’t that dangerous? It’s not air borne rabies.
    So what else is happening? And why have the Russians been so suspiciously quiet. We’ve heard from all major nations but not them.
    We’ve all been made to behave the same way at the same time. Why?
    Maybe the Earth has been circled by huge space ships. Hey that could be a movie.

    • Government and big business just testing the water to see how much of a “more regulated world” (copyright J Corbyn) could be imposed upon us?
      Funny how the catchy term “Social Distancing” was already made up and ready to go.
      This tinfoil hat makes my head sweat…

      • Couldn’t agree more Baron bastard! Finally the New World Order ( NWO ) has reared its ugly head. This is a dry run to see how we cope with a nuclear war, or a major natural disaster. We’re doooooomed do you hear me? We’re all doooooomed!

        • My little neice was at school making a mothers day card, colouring it in etc when taken ill, seems shed contracted crayola virus…..

          Look you sumbitches, tried my best.😣

          • Your jokes are better than my singing and dancing MNC!
            Being boiled alive is better than my singing and dancing, the good lady will simply not accept I am Disco Stu!

    • I love a good conspiracy theory Mac and I’ve got my tinfoil hat at the ready. I do agree that the scale of scare mongering from our leaders is fucking weird, shutting down the country for a mild dose of the flu.

      Fucking pansies either need to harden the fuck up or, as you say, there is a lot to this that isn’t being said. Corvid 19 is the least scary of any of the coronavirus, as far as I’ve been able to read up on. Pfft…..

      • Yes KC there is something far more sinister happening or about to happen.
        Watch for politicians moving out of London. They’ve already moved Queeny and the money people in the know all flogged their shares before this panic.

      • My road is deadly quiet this morning. It feels as though the Martians have landed.
        🎵Do you remember the good old days before the ghost town?
        We danced and sang, and the music played in a de boomtown
        This town is coming like a ghost town. 🎵

    • Say 80% of people are going to be fine so why the economic and social shutdown on the basis of compassion? At what point have the government of the UK been compassionate to the elderly?

      Also if supermarkets have restricted items, how come there is nothing in them? Are they really restocking at all???

      Proudly wearing my new tin foil hat.

      • Are they re-stocking? No they’re not. They’re taking the opportunity to reduce staff levels and clear slow-selling items.
        They wouldn’t even slice a loaf in Sainsburys yesterday. If all the staff were too busy filling empty shelves you could understand it. And then we get emails from the CEO telling us how hard they’re working to supply our needs.

  4. I went out Panic buying beer last night. When I got home I started Panic drinking. Got to go buy some more beer in a bit.

  5. Tim Martin is a weird cunt I can confirm. I met him a few years ago when I worked for a supplier of furniture to Wetherspoons.
    Not sure what’s going on now with the blue glasses. They make him look like a spazzy little girl at infant school in the 70s. I think he lost the plot a while back, something to do with his father.

    • A lot of these elderly eccentric businessmen, like him and Dickhead Branson and elderly pop singers like Rod Stewart & Geldof seem to morph into dotty looking old ladies, with their big greasy grey hair – all they need is their glasses on a ribbon round their necks, and they could audition for Miss Marple.

      In one sense what Martin says is true – supermarkets are equally as dangerous as pubs with people herding together to fight each other for the last 24 pack of lavatory paper – and of course big wimmin in ballet tights and their pink glittery lady phones giving it large.

    • I like the fact Tim rocks a 80s mullet, i respect stubbornness, an blokes who dont follow fashion.
      Last mullet in the UK.😢
      Like a white rhino or something, once hes gone the mullet is dead forever….

  6. These panic buying cunts must be running out of room to store all this shit. And how are they paying for it? It must all be going on the plastic which is another little problem being stored up for the future.
    I have no doubt there will be plenty of booze at the Parking Stanley’s. They seem to be able to get their hands on anything.

    • Yeah including young white girls.
      Oops a bit controversial there but whoops that’s me .
      Yeah Martin always struck me as a bit bamy. Think all that vino has frazzled his melon.

    • @Freddie Went to Sainsburys last night to see what I couldn’t buy. Lady on the till says that Argos ( in store ) had sold out of freezers and was selling a load of bread makers.
      Human trash

        • No Mac, I kid you not. Spoke to an older couple in store, they told me they know someone that have stocked up for two and a half months, seemed like they gloated about it too.

          • What happens to their food when the grid fails and we’re all using candles?
            You can gloat at them.

          • Gloating/bragging about stockpiling is retarded. I know where to get supplies if shops run out now 😀

        • We have had a bread maker for about 10 years and make loaves and homemade pizza most weeks.

          Suddenly very difficult to get bread flour, and almost impossible to buy yeast.

          Problem caused by selfish and pathetic cunts who think its the end of the fucking world.

          Wankers.

          • We bought a nice Panasonic one in 2012 and use it regularly, great bread, nothing too adventurous but useless without ingredients.

    • Talking about Parking Stanley’s, a shop near where I live run by them is charging £9.99 for a 4 pack of bog rolls.

  7. To a certain extent I agree with him, city centre pubs tend to be rammed, more rural pubs less so but I guess the government can’t have a half open half shut arrangement.
    Restaurants are a little different, tables can be spaced two metres apart but it would get fucking complicated.

    He is right about supermarkets, I normally do my weekly shop on Saturday mornings, around 7am…. its quiet, the odd other early bird and the store staff personal shoppers. Today it wasn’t rammed but it was more like 10am than 7.

    • “the government can’t have a half open half shut arrangement.”

      That appears to be precisely what they have in mind for schools. I was talking to a teacher this morning who says she’s basically going to be a daily babysitter to kids, with parents who are key workers, for the next god-knows-how-long. But just them, the rest of the kids can fuck off.

  8. There already was ‘Social Distancing’ in Westherspoons when I used go in there. What with all the farting and puking I see it now as good preparation for our present predicament.

  9. The problem with keeping the pubs open is that you end up with people getting pissed on a Friday/Saturday night, and usually ending up in A&E, which is the last thing the NHS need to deal with during the current crisis.

    Pissed cunts on the streets will detract the police and the ambulance service from performing more vital tasks elsewhere. But cunts like Martin don’t see that far ahead – all he’s bothered about is the money!

    • Evening Techno. Last time we were up your side of the world, about 6 years ago, we ended up in a Wetherspoon’s at a friend’s request. To be honest, I thought it was shit; limited selection of beer/wine, terrible bar service and God awful food. The crappy dump is cheap for a reason.

          • Morning Liberal! 😀👍🏼
            Percy and I are both going on lockdown from Monday. The thought of being stuck with him in the same place for months on end fills me with dread. I’m that fuckin’ hungry, I’ll probably eat him before the week is out and then use his plumage for wiping my arse!

          • Morning Bertie, he really could end up in that three bird roast you threatened him with at Christmas then.

  10. Went into Sainsbury’s yesterday evening as had bog roll in. Thought I’d get some beer as going round mates house for a catch up and only cases of Heineken left and 4 large bottles of Estrella. Got the 4 bottles but at the checkout told I was limited to only 2 per customer!!! So I can buy 2 cases of 24 cans but not 4 bottles of 500ml beer.
    cunts

    • Home Bargains had 18-roll packs of bog paper. Same issue, tho admittedly I haven’t seen paper in there for ages.
      Government need to tell manufacturers to package in, say, max of 8 or 9-roll packs. And get the bloody Army out to shoot panick buyers…

      I wonder if David Pannick QCunt is calm and collected. Haven’t heard of him for some time…

  11. I make bread and brew beer. However I cant get flour at the moment so have to drink on an empty stomach. I suppose some fucker has to.
    Tim Martin has a vested interest so his opinion is suspect.

        • Aye after a day on site in riggers and seaboot socks there was a definite Marmitey aroma filling the car’s footwell on the drive home. I reckon chucking a pair of the missus’ skiddies in the mash would probably yield an even more fearsome and uncompromising (yet curiously moorish) brew.

  12. Off topic, but I’m sure all present will be delighted to hear that a bunch of slack arsed Hollywood actor cunts have released a cover of John Lennon’s “Imagine”
    That’s “the Communist Manifesto set to music” in the former Beatle’s own words.
    There’s nothing like being told to “imagine no posessions” by a bunch of spoiled millionaire cunts…

    • I always hated that fucking son and Lennon was a cunt . Maybe write some good songs but a cunt as a person. Always liked a bad tempered fucker. As for Yoko,useless leech.

    • Still on show business, you will be as distraught as Dominic Grieve is to know that due to Coronavirus, his weekly residency at the Rose and Crown has been terminated. Poor old Dommie has had to put his old organ away – at least for the time being, though he hopes to be able to persue the rythym method again one day in the future.

      The same bleak picture can be seen in Scotland, where, for the same reason the Ian Blackford Trio (known by their stage names of Jock Strap and His Two Swingers) will no longer amuse the punters at The Tartan Ballroom.

      Imagine must have been Lennon’s nadir – he set hypocrisy to music.

  13. Dio – don’t I recall you being a little more dismissive of the virus a few weeks ago and referring to it as just another type of flu? Or are you like the Government and handling the situation on a day by day basis? 😀

  14. Lots of pubs in London were packed last night.
    People like Tim and his thick cunt customers will push this country towards where Italy, Iran and Spain are and really fuck up the NHS.

    Time for Boris to get draconian

    • Iran and Italy are in a bad way because they have Chinese investments and a huge number of chinks go to ports in those countries. India rejected a trade offer with the chink and interestingly has far fewer cases .
      After all this settles we need to manufacture more goods at home and import less from Asia. That would help revitalise the north, more production. All this globalisation and unfettered movement has massively increased this problem. Make more in Britain and rely less on others.

      • Totally agree Mac, we are way too reliant on imports. Let’s invest in our own people and create world leading manufacturing here.

  15. Tim Martin is a decent bloke and was one of the Brexit heroes so not a cunt.
    Remember that interview with Terry fuckwit Christian when he kept being interrupted. I think he’s alright. Shutting the pubs is daft.

  16. He seems like an ok bloke and one of the few who had the balls and intelligence to speak up regarding Brexit and the positives for doing so.

    But personally think he is wrong here, and that the pubs should close for the time being.

    The hard working wife Mrs Stroker has been told that the hotel/restaurant where she works is shutting down until further notice. About a month ago 300 people had booked in for mothers day on Sunday. About a week ago the number had reduced to around 100. I went into Costa with Mrs Stroker on Tuesday at midday. Usually packed. Before the government on Tuesday it was virtually empty, there were two groups of two people. Opened at 7am, first customers served at 9.30am.

    I totally understand that there are far less people venturing out but if pubs can open, why not restaurants, coffee bars, cinemas, gyms etc. And that totally defeats the point of what we and others in the world are trying to do, namely stopping people catching and dying from the China virus.

    Tim Martin is far from being a cunt, perhaps just wrong on this one.

  17. Even at the best of times it’s hard to take a cunt who sounds as thick as Tim Martin seriously. He should spend some of his millions on elocution lessons. Sounds almost as dumb as that clueless Chairman of the Labour Party cunt Ian Lavery.

    • Agreed Ruff Tuff

      He does sound like a thick cunt, however despite must be reasonably intelligent in order to have built up a multi million pound empire.

      Happy to listen him in the Brexit debates, mainly because there weren’t any other fuckers prepared to speak out in favour of wanting it to happen.

      • Morning Willie.

        Speaking of Brexit. Following Barnier testing positive for Corbyn-19, the EU has let it be known that they would be open to extending the transition period should the UK government request it…

        That’s nice of them.

        And at only an extra £12 billion net for every year extended it’s a bargain! 😂

  18. Well I’m going to piss off all the coranavirus scare mongers and say I totally agree with Tim Martin…
    Most people that get this , that’s including myself and Mrs Fustula get mild to moderate symptoms but the media and the corrupt WHO dont want to hear that. We’re on lock down for 14 days and I have to say the symptoms are nothing compared to Flu I’ve had in the past. Yes, vulnerable people will die just like they die of seasonal Flu . If the media hadn’t scared everyone into believing its Armageddon this virus would have come and gone just like any other virus.

    • This is exactly what I’ve been saying, if the media had said nothing it would likely have been and gone by now and nobody would have been any the wiser. I suspect it’s a global conspiracy to make sure Liverpool don’t win the league. In the meantime, I got some eggs this morning – yay!

      • Sorry to hear that Fenton, gave you a ticky but not being rude posted here using Moggie as a human barrier in case you infected me!

    • anyone jumping off a cliff in Britain today will be declared to have died from coronavirus – nobody is allowed to die from anything else!

  19. Thanks Chaps.
    Feel a bit rough now . Should of kept my mouth shut. As I said it’s nothing like Flu Ive had in the past.

    • Hang in there FF! Anyone who Terry bitter and twisteyan hates is OK with me, but I think Tim Martin is wrong and irresponsible on this one – plus my local Wetherspoons is a filthy unhygienic dive staffed by chavs and frequented by t’ trackie bottoms types!
      There is something very sinister going on with coronavirus, Boris does not have a clue what to do and we are being spun daily lies and horror stories by the BBC.
      They are placing social restrictions everywhere because after decades of underinvestment, incompetent management and treating the rest of the World for free at the expense of our own the NHS does not have the capacity to handle a major outbreak.
      Something very dark and Orwellian is going on behind the scenes, and we are being lied to and deceived.
      This may be the catalyst to bigger things, I think the Government is testing to see how far we can be pushed before we kick back (around half the blink of an eye in my case).

      • The average annual number of UK deaths attributable to influenza is circa 6,000 fatalities: that’s the AVERAGE for a normal year!

  20. I’ve been doing a bit of research and have found that every cunt with the surname Martin is a cunt.

    All apart from pikéy killer Tony Martin. He’s a top bloke.

    Tony is the exception that proves the rule. Whatever the fuck that means.

  21. Dismal news – my local Sainsburys is out of bread for the fifth day in a row, there is a Sainsburys warehouse 8 miles away from where I live stacked to the rafters with food and Sainsburys tell me they have stood all their fucking drivers down!
    Madness, and the most annoying thing is the queues of chavs and peacefuls first thing on a morning (only time they will see 8AM unless they are in Court) stripping the shelves of bread with no restriction.
    F*ck this – I’m off hunting with me bow, some of the fatties round here will keep me going for a Month!

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