I’ve lost all interest in golf (not that I ever really had any…) since, when I was a kid, I was out walking on the local GC with my Dad, and got bawled out by some old… fuck only knows… a monstrous THING in a tweedy skirt, apparently I’d kicked “its” ball out of the way…

As my Dad said, we were walking in the rough, so the thing must have been a fairly crap shot. I still wonder if it was a so-called “Lady golfer”, or maybe just a rather unpleasant-looking tv… (Lady golfers normally seem to wear trizers like Rupert the Bear’s).

And didn’t that red-head splosher, formerly married to the paedo-Andrew, live on the edge of a golf course? Did that make her the 20th hole, or the 21st…

Nominated by: HBelinda Hubbard