19 thoughts on “Christmas lights [2]

  1. Season’s Greeting fellow cunters, from all of us at the Bastard residence! May Piers Morgan’s turkey taste just like the shit that comes out of his mouth……

    • Does anybody have a fictional character in the pool? no They do not! but I heard han solo dies in force awankens *spoiler alert fuckoo’s but harrison “shoots first” ford doesn’t have long to go I imagine.

      • Actually got off my arse and took the mrs to see The Force Awakens… Better than I expected (and better than all three prequels combined!), but any chinstroker who says it matches the 1977 original and The Empire Strikes Back is talking both hype and bollocks.. Han Solo deserved a better ending than that… He should have gone down in a Western style shoot-out with a worthy old enemy, like Boba Fett… Not get killed off by some snotty little turd with a Darth Vader fetish and a poof’s name… Quite looking forward to Episode 8 now, and see Luke Skywalker dismember the little cunt…

        • Really you liked it? well glad you enjoyed it I couldn’t be arsed stars wars is kinda dead for me. Boba Fett is a awesome villain by the way also palpatine and darth vader, darth maul is a wank. Luke skywalker(mark hammil) is still alive or is he african(black) now? hahaha

          • Hammil/Luke has a massive part in the next one… Hopefully he will chop Kylo Cunt to pieces…

            It was better than the Phantom Menace and those other two shite prequels. but still nowhere near A New Hope and Empire… I also like Boba Fett and all those bounty hunters (Dengar, Bossk, IG-88 etc)..

          • I hate the lightsaber fights in the prequels they were souless choreography which lacked realness and depth. In star wars new hope and empire they barely took out their sabers but when they did, it was a defining moment with no overblown fights with flying around the room being a stupid cunt.
            It was more of a symbolic tool in the originals it wasn’t a flashy show off shite. It meant how much good intentions(magic) vs bad intentions(magick) you had. The KyloRen Mask looks kinda copy& paste from darth vader I’m not sold on it.
            Mark Hammil did a great job on the jokers voice in the batman video games (arkham asylum and arkham city) and batman animated series(great series btw my favorite more so then the craptastic movies). Tho I like the batman film with jack nicklson and dark knight with heath legder was pretty good. You should play them if that’s your thing and if you got a xbox 360 or PS3. Cheers mate

  2. Andrei Kanchelskis is a cunt… Van Gaal may be under fire at the moment, but for this llittle fucker to say LVG isn’t a United manager is taking the piss… Could this be the same Andrei Kanchelskis who shafted Fergie and sold his United contract, his grandmother and his arse to the Russian Mafia? Or could it be the same Kanchelskis who, in 1995, posed in an Everton shirt with the FA Cup, straight after they had beaten United? Fuck off, Andrei, you beetroot guzzling, Smirnoff soaked Russkie cunt…

    • I saw that earlier and thought what a sneaky cunt and how he typifies the soviet union mentality!

  3. The worst bloody thing with mega-efficient low consumption lighting, is that absolutely EVERY fucking square inch of some cunt’s garage, house, outdoor crapper, Amdega execution shed is COVERED with these luminescent abominations. They could surely be banned; ISIS cunts could target a rocket on these from thousands of miles away.
    May the bluebird of happiness piss on them all from a great height!!

    On a lighter but discordant note, I had the very great misfortune to see some of a live performance on tv of The Sound of Music… I woke up the next morning during a rather nasty dream of a Nuremburg rally, Hitler saluting, then conducting in true Herr Lipp fashion, “All together, kiddies, one, two, one two three four” and about 50, 000 Hitler Youth bursting forth into “Doe, a deer, a female deer” etc. It could only have got worse had uber-cunt Justin Bieber been there to lead the massed choirs, dressed up as some Bavarian milkmaid cheerleader. Fack me, I must lay orf the Patagonian knob-cheese footballs…

    Could we have a new category for the worst songs ever written? I nominate the above, plus Jailbait Harris’ Tie me kangaroo down, sport, and Two little boys… (explains a lot, that does). He deserved 25 years penal servitude for the B-side alone, KFC (kiddie-fiddling cunt)!!

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