Dead Pool (5)

* * * * UPDATE * * * *
As Sir Limply rightly points out, we keep missing the target with this pool, so here’s a quick rule change for this one only : Each entrant will be allowed a maximum of 5. I’m feeling generous because Limply’s already had 4 goes.

Let’s face it, you cunts have been giving me multiples anyway!

We have a winner!

The Dead Pool 4 has been won by Ollie Burton’s Granddad
who correctly guessed the next cunt to kick the cunting bucket
… therefore becoming a dead cunt.

Ollie correctly predicted “Clive Dunn 92 not out but has to pop his clogs soon for fucks sake”

Well done! – Not least of all for stopping that cunt Dioclese winning three in a row!

Right then!
The slate has been wiped clean and everyone gets to pick
a new ‘dead cunt walking’ as we move on to The Dead Pool 5.
No rule changes but in case you’re new to the world of
predicting bucket kicking cunts, here’s a refresher:

1. Nominate who you think is next on the way out.
One Cunt each. Leave names in the Comments.

2. You win if your Cunt dies first.
Then the slate is wiped clean and everyone picks another one,
so my top tip is to be quick off the mark and
steal someone else’s dead cunt candidate from the last Dead Pool.

Any cunt who tries to cheat by nominating the World’s Oldest Man or Woman is a cunt and will be ignored. The winner gets a dedicated Dead Pool Champion post and kudos of cuntishness aplenty. Oh, and the usual “Our Blog Our Rules” thing applies.

132 thoughts on “Dead Pool (5)

  1. Fair game to the cunt who has bagged Cunt Dracula but I will now cast my net to Eastern Europe for a good each way bet on a quick death
    Former Polish President General Wojciech Jaruzelski; he looks well fucking scabby at the moment, Lets hope the fucker expires asap.

  2. Having magnaminously given up Shatner I am also going to go for Paul O’Grady, another luvvy panto dame with a dodgy ticker. Has gone into hospital for an emergency heart op so Gristle remains ever hopeful. If there is no result soon I will nominate Gristle and wring his neck personally.

    • I’m keeping my fingers crossed for O’Grady – what an annoying talent-free zone that cunt is.

  3. One of you cunts out there who hasn’t yet nominated your five might like to think about George Cole. He’s being interviewed on TV right now – he’s 88 and doesn’t look a day over 90. Pretty fucking shaky and a rather good bet, I’d say.

  4. I’d like to nominate the ex Israeli prime minister Ariel Sharon. He’s not referred too as a cunt nearly as often as he should be. Probably because he’s been in a coma for almost 8 years and people assume he is dead.
    I have to laugh because the cunt can’t move at all but the doctors say his brain is active. Very fitting punishment for a total cunt. Perhaps this could be done to all politician cunts one day in a beautiful future world.

  5. This Mandela cove has been nominated so many times by so many cunts in recent times I don’t think any single cunt can claim exclusive rights on his kicking of the bucket. If Ollie Burtons Paedo Grandad wants credit for anything let it be for our delight at the deluge of snivelling tributes that are going to be tormenting us for weeks. Personally I think it is all a stunt to promote the Mandela filum which is premiering at this very time.

    • Fuck it’s going to be relentless. I’ve already heard the cunt Camoron, Bollock Obomba and Bob bloody Geldof on the radio today. As if Mandela gave a fuck about those wankers!

  6. For your information Limpdick; Mandela was my original choice at the start of this particular Dead Pool.
    That being the case go fuck yourself you jealous trampwanker

  7. Quite pathetic really having the arse over a dead list on a website. You reckon I need to get a life?
    Pot kettle black.

  8. Been away for a couple of days but just caught the news on Mandelavision (new name for the BBC – or so it seems!)

    I have the definitive list on a spreadsheet (how fucking sad is that?) and can confirm that the winner is OLLIE BURTON’S GRANDAD! Well done, OBG! You get a guest post on any subject you like as a prize.

    I’ll be resetting the Dead Pool shortly when I’ve fixed the fucking boiler and trawled all the dead leaves out of the fish pond…

    Happy days, but at least there’s one more dead cunt. Time to get those T-shirts on sale FS.

    And just a thought – won’t his state funeral be a great target for a terrorist bomb?…

  9. Just watch the ANC bring out a Mandela Doll so all the sad fucktards can go buy one. It’s probably why they have had him in a deep freeze for the last few months.
    Funny to think that his last resting place was beside steak cut chips onion rings and dodgy bush meat sausages

    • I would buy said doll if only to stick pins in it. Could do a Winnie doll as well. What a lovely pair, sigh…..

  10. Oh, if you are rejuvenating the dead pool thingy I would like to nominate Arthur Askey.

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