It was about 18 months ago.
I was away on business and staying in a hotel.
I hadn’t had that much to drink the night before but I kept having to get up for a piss.

I must have got up a dozen times.
I was pissing for Spain.
Something wasn’t right.

When I got home I went to the chemist and she gave me a simple blood test.
She said that I had diabetes and made me an appointment with my doctor.
She told me that all of that pissing was my body trying to get rid of the sugar.

My doctor made arrangements for a full set of tests and it was confirmed.
The Artful Cunter is damaged goods.

I was given a prescription for three different types of pills and a diet sheet to follow.

I asked how long I needed to take the pills for and she told me the rest of your life.
She cheerfully added, ‘so not too long’.

That’s when things changed for the worse in the Cunter household.

The wife insists that I stick to the fucking diet sheet and everything on it is fucking horrible.
If you are ever tempted, DO NOT eat brown rice.
It tastes like I imagine cat litter does.

Any chocolates or sweets in Casa Cunter are hidden away.
Chips and other fried foods are off limits.

The wife tells me that Queen Elizabeth I died of diabetes.
The fucking woman was 67 in a time when you died of old age in your 20’s.

When we go out to eat it’s a case of, “You’re not eating that!”
If I ignore her then I get accusing looks all night.

“You’re not going to have another beer are you? Don’t you think that you have had enough?”.

Well obviously fucking not because I have just ordered another one.

I used to be able to go away on business and not hear from Mrs Cunter for days.
But now she is on the phone 3 times a day.

Not asking about the hotel, city or work.
She wants to know what I have been eating.

Bless her.
She means well but I do wish that she would shut the fuck up.

Diabetes is a cunt.

diabetes uk

Nominated by The Artful Cunter.

I’ve never liked this attention seeking old boot.

She’s always been willing to whip her withered udders out for some publicity, had more free lunches than kier Starmer ,
And talks bollocks.

In a recent interview she said

”
You lose people along the way. And I always say it’s so sad that Kurt Cobain died when he did because he never saw GPS as it’s the most wonderful thing to watch my little blue spot walking down the street”.

?!!
Kurt Cobain was a self pitying little smackrat.
What would he do with GPS?
Find a methadone clinic?

She’s senile.

She also waffles on about going to church as a atheist (why?)

Look.supergran,
You may of been worth a root 50yr ago but nowadays you’re just a luvvie from yesteryear.
Shut the fuck up.

Daily Fail

Nominated by Miserable northern cunt.

is a cunt.

So I went on a bender. Generally it does no harm, I just listens to Kevin Bloody Wilson and The Doors while a week or ten days pass and I et the urge to sober up and clean up the detritus surrounding me. This time I climbed out of bed to go plonk myself on the couch for a Netflix binge-fest and Chech and Chong remedy and ‘0wie’. Pain shot up my tailbone. I must have smashed it getting on and off the bog. Unless I have suddenly developed a degenerative disease.

I am used to disability. I had a stroke when I was thirty one; completely paralysed while pregnant but because I’m a legend I recovered and had three more kids to the two I was already responsible for. They’re all rotten teenagers now and one got groomed by the trannies and another by the Mexican cartels who addict and recruit in the ‘burbs of California. After being in a constant state of paranoia from two no-knock raids by CA’s fully armed police looking to link my fentanyl addicted son to the death of another kid. First name basis with the head of the DEA. No support from the ex. And doing a 25 hour round trip with a methed up opioid addict kid on the come-down to get him to rehab. I removed myself from my marriage to reduce the level of chaos. To Austin, Texas. Generally I have no complaints. Except my bum hurts and I don’t like to take pills. Got any recommendations or experience?

Nominated by CaliAngel.

 
is a cunt.

The UK has fallen to its lowest ever score in Transparency International’s Corruption Perceptions Index (CPI). = 71

Politicians, Civil Servants (who really govern the United Kuntdom) big business, bankers etc are responsible for turning this once decent Country into a cesspit of corruption and, embezzlement, which surprises nobody. However when we are ranked amongst another 179, including the biggest shitholes on the planet, we continue to plummet down the scale of honesty. How dare any CUNT in politics or the “Establishment” ever talk about integrity or honesty again until a vast improvement is made?

transparency.org

Nominated by Sir Cuntalot.