Apparently this poor love is so overworked that she (in her own words) can’t find the time to have something to eat… I am sure that there are those in full time and totally knackering jobs who feel so sorry for her… Everyone else seems to manage it, so what makes this silly cow so different? My old man worked 12 hour shifts fixing lorries, but he still got his dinner…

But one musn’t be nasty, must we? The poor petal mustn’t despair, because I’ve thought of a solution to her terrible starvation problem…. Elllie can spend less time squawking tuneless crap, posing for pictures like a trollop, and talking shit… Then she might find the time to learn how to use a sandwich toaster…. Simple, really….

Nominated by: Norman