is a cunt.
Another thing that needs a cunting is the Emergency Alert system.
There I was feeding treats to one of the cats when the phone flashes and an annoying wibble tone frightened the cat off.
So what was so damn important who knows as it’s in Welsh and I don’t speak the language. Has Putin decided to nuke us and the PM is letting us know we’ve time to boil an egg, or the Orange man has pushed the button in error.
Well shortly after the English version arrives to frightening the cats again. Turns out said emergency is a warning about fires in Wales and not to go burning the countryside.
Well as the PM has banned the barbeque things and the fires are being set by feral yoofs it was all a bit fucking pointless.
No doubt we’ll get another one about flooding when the wet weather arrives followed by one on imported brown rapey stabby folk being abused by the folk they’re raping an stabbing.
The Emergency System is a cunt that failed to do anything except frighten the cats(twice)
Nominated by Paul Goddard.
Not a problem in the Brain household Paul. For whatever reason these messages don’t turn up on our phones.
2
That alert could’ve genuinely caused an older person to have a heart attack.
I was having a lovely nap with the phone next to when that alarm went off.
Fucking shit myself! I only live a few miles from Fairford air base and thought the Russkies were invading, not that Wales was actually dry and nor rain-sodden for the first time in 300 years.
4
Reading your nom again Paul, the message was a classic example of wokeism. I presume you were in Wales at the time and the message first came through in Welsh. This system is supposed to warn of immediate danger to life. Most Welsh folks speak no more Wesh than I do so there was a delay in the message arriving in a language understood by the majority.
4
Turned that off years ago..
The only emergency alert I want to hear about is parliament has exploded, no survivors..
5
You can always turn the fucking things off.
I did, straight after my mobile made a hell of a noise about a minor earthquake hundreds of kilometers away.
I bet that every Jap has their alerts turned off.
They get dozens of minor earthquakes every day.
But it makes you wonder why, if these alerts are so important, that a mobile user has the option to totally disregard them.
It also makes you wonder how many billions it costs to set up these systems.
The people of Valencia and the surrounding areas were given the warning of the recent DANA two hours after it happened.
Not particularly useful.
Good morning.
2
I’d forgotten about this.
A national alarm over fire.
Not about a invasion of Islamic dinghy riders.
they aren’t alarmed by that.
Fuck off.
Grass now looks lush and green,
you couldn’t start a fire if you tried.
8
Down here Mis, we had weeks and weeks of temperatures in the high twenties and low thirties and not a drop of rain. The lawns turned to straw and the reports on the television suggested the apocalypse was upon us. Last week we saw our first rain. Yesterday I mowed our long green grass.
3
its been leathering it down here Arfur.
full on deluge, thunder and lightning , and rain that causes little streams on the roads.
ive almost forgotten the disgusting summer with its unbritish heatwave.
sanity has returned
1
I gather that First Grifter of State Haigh was behind this.
It beats me why almost everyone carries a spying device around with them that tells the powers that be where they are and what they’re doing all the time, even when the bastard is switched off.
And now you can have the shit scared out of you by a convicted fraudster as well. That’s another reason why I’ll never get one. Telling me I’ve got 3 minutes for a last shag is a lot of fucking use when knowing I’m about to be incinerated alive ain’t going to give me a hard on.
Fuck off and good morning.
3
I dunno Geordie, it depends who was forecast to be in the area of the firestorm. If I thought that Haigh was about to be immolated, now that would give me a hard on.
2
When I think about it, technology has not moved on very well.
Back in 1940 and 41, the emergency alert system was a bunch of volunteers running to the air raid warning alarms and frantically cranking them by hand.
They would do so at the first sighting of an attack, and they gave as much notice as possible for people to get safely underground.
Countless lives were saved.
85 years on and we get warnings, if we can be bothered to receive them, about things that have already happened, and in most cases don’t affect us in the slightest.
The OP got his first warning in Welsh.
I wonder how long it will be before the first warnings come in Arabic, followed by Urdu, Bangladeshi, Afghan, Pakistani….. Etc.
English will be last on the list.
4
Just out of interest Paul.
Did you ever get an alert telling you that the fires were under control and the danger had passed?
Thought not.
The governments do like to have their populations shitting themselves as long as possible.
3
It would be interesting to establish how much pressure our beloved govt applies to mobile phone manufacturers to deny access to the ability to manually switch off these ridiculous “alerts” by the owner.
The very first thing I do with any new phone is turn such alerts off permanently..
No doubt this makes persons in authority quite cross.
Excellent,fuck them.
The shit-a-bed cunts.
Good morning.
2
Shove the “emergency alarm’ up Burnbums arse.Cleft cunt.
1
I think Louise Haigh started the wildfires.
Shes a convicted fraudster
a proven liar,
why not a pyromaniac?
seems in character.
Nobody has asked her where she was.
or why she has petrol soaked rags in the boot of her car, or why she has 50 bic lighters in her handbag.
you dont need to be Colombo…
1
ps
Danish Oil.
you ever treated wood with Danish oil?
rub it into the grain using a rag.
careful!!!!💥💥💥💀
Danish oil can self ignite when left on a rag.
burning your shed to the ground.
or melting your wheelie bin .
TRUE.
look it up.
I haven’t told the government they’ll only panic and launch a £15 million warning campaign
1
My pussy remained unaffected by the alarm.
🐈
1
put it on vibrate Sam👍
1
Can I suggest that you switch the alarm to vibrate and keep your mobile down the front of your knickers.
Thank me later.
0
That August alert was the fault of that daft old tart Louise Haigh. Like Mandy, in the Blair era, she was left “in charge” and decided to exercise her power, by doing something stupid and unnecessary – and potentially dangerous for people who have secret phones if they are in abusive relationships.
1
I don’t even get false alarms.
0
The green gold is finally growing again so fuck the government and their mobile alarms.
I wonder if Tavia is still hiding under the stairs, like that nip soldier from WW2 who no one told the war was over for 30 years?
1
Apparently the alert system is a good way to locate mobile phones in prisons..😂
1
I disabled the alert crap as soon as they announced a test a year or two back, I don’t even use the mobile broadband if I am out and about unless I need something specific and then just turn it on.
It was a done deal that the cunts would misuse it, fuck sake, don’t light fires near a patch of tinder-dry grass, ah well guess the labour cunts think we are all as stupid as they are. Note, those stupid enough to light fires wouldn’t be put off by a government message 😂
1
Other incoming alerts scheduled. Angie has sucked her 1 thousand peaceful cock, this week..
Diane Abbott has put her shoes on the right feet, two days in a row.
And trans sue perkins has learned the chords to teenage kicks..
0
Why not go into your settings and simply turn off the emergency alerts? It’s the first thing I do when I get a new phone.
0