are cunts.
Oh dear. It has come to pass, I have had to cunt myself. There are a set of simple rules for this site, one of them being not to comment on the noms. I transgressed. And that got me thinking – why can’t people, including me, follow simple rules – I see it everyday:
– don’t park on the grass verge – they do
– don’t litter – they do
– clear up your dog shit – they don’t
And if I can’t follow simple rules, then how can I complain about anyone else?
Nominated by Lord Cuntingford.
Quirky nom Lord C.
It reminds me of the time I broke the first rule of Mute Club.
9
Most rules are thought up by jobsworths.
Being a right cunt I go out of my way not to follow them.
15
I follow the rules to the letter.
Unfortunately I can’t read an write,
So ‘do.not trespass’
‘private property ‘etc
Are wasted on me.
You a slow learner or something Lord C?
I think Admin should of given you ten lashes for your breach of etiquette.
9
Someone please remind what are the rules? And do they apply to me.
Because the more I see everyday in this country, rules don’t seem to apply to certain demographics.
19
There are huge fuck off plain as day signs in the kidney unit.
They tell people not to have their phones on loud, and request patients to use headphones.
Of, course, this gets totally ignored. As our Paki friends don’t give a fuck, as they torture us with loud conversations in gibberish, screeching Paki offspring and Bollywood shite at ear splitting volumes.
Thing is, these rules are pointless. As no member of staff ever tells them to belt up and turn it down/off. As they are all scared of being called racist. So, why bother printing these rules out in the first place?
Mind you, a fellow patient (a white English person) briefly put on Fleetwood Mac on her phone. And several members of staff couldn’t tell her quick enough to turn it down. She did this to see how fast the staff were at telling a white person to obey these rules. Needless to say, they were like shit off a shovel.
29
Another rule is the seatbelt in the ambulance. The cheeky cunts giving out leaflets to all the patients who obey this rule and wear the seatbelt without a problem.
Yet, the ones who don’t wear them – the Pakis, naturally – just play dumb, pretend they don’t understand it or can’t read it, and they just get away with it like they do with everything.
When they say there’s a 500 quid fine for anyone who refuses to wear a seatbelt, they mean any white person who doesn’t wear a seatbelt.
And don’t get me started on the white patients having to pay for taxis, and the brown people getting them for free. Because the cunts at the hospital do that and all.
14
@norm….the Fleetwood Mac lady should have told members of staff to ‘go their own way’ then 👍…my daughter is a nurse and I’ve told her if I’m ever in her hospital I will have a tribe around my bed like our ‘me no understandy’ brigade simples ✔️
12
The song she put on was ‘Dreams’. Gelderd.
But she was testing how the rules always apply to us and not to them. And she was absolutely right.
7
Waycist!
6
Don’t cunt other cunters and don’t get personal.
That is the No.1 rule, and I agree with it.
18
Well you would say that wouldn’t you Norman!
13
That’s the best bit of ISAC!
When it’s the BBC nom 350 and the monotony is broken by a argument with plenty of insults thrown.
Marvelous 👍
11
A bit of sparring is fine. Keeps things ticking over. And i have disagreed with other cunters here. I still like and respect them though.
But it’s when it gets ridiculous and out of hand.
Insults and backbiting without end and then it turns ugly.
Not unlike the comments sections at the Guardian.
There was one cunt one here, called himself Cunt Fu or Kung Flu or something stupid like that. One night (while pissed, I presume), this prick posted something about my cats eating me when I die. Straight up and he wan’t joking. Mind you, I think he got nasty with a few other cunters here.
And Admin has enough to do, without refereeing such childish antics and cleaning up the mess.
7
Kung Fu?
He’s chief Admin now.
7
Pretty sure the Guardian doesn’t have a comments section, Norman.
Let’s face it, anyone with any sense of reality would be piling in there calling their ‘journalists’ a bunch of clueless leftard cunts who should go and live in a tent in Calais along with their pets.
11
I think the Guardian banned its own comments section, Odin.
As it always escalated into a ‘he said. she said’ free for all without end.
Also, funny that such a supposedly liberal and free thinking paper attracted psychopaths and childish cunts in droves.
7
That was me in the comments section.
That’s why they stopped it.
6
If Britannia Waives The Rules I’m sure I can.
14
I don’t mind rules if they make sense.
It’s petty trivial ones that are a invitation to break them.
20mph!
Why?
There’s fuck all about?
Smart dress only!
Yeah right🙄
We will not tolerate abusive language!
Get fucked.
Dog fouling prohibited!
£1000 fine
Maybe use that grand to buy a public bin you council Gestapo cunt!🖕
15
Do you still have ‘Tradesman’s entrance round the back’ sign on the Country Cream gates Mis? And do you ever get a slightly confused and disappointed Wes Streeting waiting outside having misunderstood?
14
Not seen him yet LL,
But the dog is ready for him.
If he sashayed up my plum slate path with a loud
“Yoohooo!! Anybody home ducky darling?”
The dog would hit him at speed,
Grab one of his limp wrists and pin him to the spot so I could have time to dispatch him with Cuddles the friendly half brick.
Few solid swift taps to the back of his greasy head and he can go for a nap on the moors.
11
in a similar vein, some sound advice LL;
https://www.reddit.com/r/technicallythetruth/comments/1031k5f/sure_using_the_rear_entrance_does_help/?rdt=38822
6
It’s the unwritten rules of etiquette that I follow to the letter.
Only the other week I was enjoying a convivial evening in my gentleman’s club (the only women admitted are cleaners and strippers, and quite right too). Whilst enjoying a post prandial hand rolled Havana and glass of Warre’s ’87, some poor sap sat at my table shockingly passed the port to the right.
Well as you can imagine, all present were appalled at such a breach of etiquette. A delegation of us made representations to the Committee and the fellow’s membership was cancelled with immediate effect.
Sadly the shame of the event weighed heavily on the poor chap, who blew his brains out a few days later. All terribly sad of course, but the right thing for him to have done in the circumstances.
Rule Britannia.
26
A cad and a bounder b’gad, who at least still had enough of the gentleman about him to do the decent thing.
13
I only pass the port when the bottle’s empty. Or, usually, throw it at somebody I don’t like.
11
Ah yes Rules,that Great British Tradition.
All well and good in 1938 when the country wasn’t rammed full of jabbering foreign trash.
These days,as Norman has pointed out and unfortunately personally experienced,it’s one rule for us and another for the vermin.
Here’s a rule that could be enacted with excellent results..
Oven for Cunts.
All of em.
15
Talking of laws, Mr Beau`s manhood is exactly 12 inches in length, but he doesn`t use it as a rule.
📏
13
I think the answer as to why people keep on littering, don’t clean up their dog’s shite or what-have-you is plain and simple.
They’re ignorant, selfish or plain thick. Or a combination of all three.
Afternoon all.
15
I think that it’s because there are not enough signs up telling them what to do.
10
Indeed, Art.
Some people today need a serving suggestion on a Mars bar wrapper.
Other people don’t follow simple rules because they’re special, so rules don’t apply to them.
Certain people have a ” do as I say, not as I do” attitude, don’t they Sir Keir?
8
Trumps on telly😁
Bet he doesn’t follow rules.
He makes em!
On about the wall.
Says if he wins he’s going to put a 25% tariff on Mexico.
Aye caramba!!!!
I loved that Wall❤️
To stand on that and piss on the sombreros below would of been the only reason I’d go to the US.
GO DONALD 👍
12
A lot of extra new rules since 2020.
Ve vill inject you, You vill comply.
Der are funfzig genders, you heterosexual dogs.
You vill take the knee or be vilified publicly.
You vill buy our EVs , solar panels and heat pumps because ve say so.
You vill be scanned in the streets, Der is no escape from Mien Kampf.
You understand No 6, Gut
8
Pardon?
8
More rules on the way chaps.
You’ll appreciate this Adolph. It’s Labour’s new slogan for the next election proclaiming the Dear Leader to be the living embodiment of our great nation:
Ein Volk, Ein Reich, Ein Toolmaker’s Son
12
I simply can’t get over how appropriate it is that the cunt’s dad is a toolmaker.
12
my German is a bit rusty, Herr Schict
4
Rules are OK if they are sensible and they apply to everyone.
I was walking past a communal pool on an urbanisation and some cunt of a German actually started shouting at me… In English!
He was pointing at the huge list of rules on display telling me that glasses were not allowed in the pool area.
The fucker was going into one.
I told him that didn’t apply to sunglasses and if he had a problem with that then he should call the police.
The silly cunt.
Another time I took back a faulty printer which I had brought the previous day.
The wanker behind the counter pointed to a sign saying that there was no refunds.
Again, the sign was written in English so they obviously are trying to rip off foreigners.
I demanded, in Spanish, the companies ‘hoya de reclamaciones’ which is a formal complaint book that all companies must provide.
It must be completed in Spanish for the Consumer Office to take seriously, so hardly anyone ever asks for one.
He quickly gave me a refund.
The shifty cunt.
14
Very true about Germans, Artful.
Only the other day I was out walking when a German shepherd sauntered over to me and sniffed my crotch. I wouldn`t care, but then his fucking dog did the same thing.
Fucking disgraceful race of sausage munchers.
🌭
15
The comedy Dame can shove his rules up his raddled arse.
8
Fuck you!! I won’t do what you tell me.
7
You say jump?
I say how high.
I’m like Forrest Gump.
Sir,yes sir.
Tuck that lip in private.
The most famous sacrosanct rule is
Keep off the grass.
And it should carry a mandatory 10 year prison sentence.
Fuckin flatfooted anarchist cunts trampling all over it.
Lot of rulebreakers on ISAC.
I was admin?
It’d be year zero on you people.
6
If I was Chief Admin I’d ban anyone from Stockport.
No particular reason, I just fancy being malicious, spiteful and vindictive like the Government.
10
But are folks from New Mills exempt?
8
I could extend my malice, spite and vindictiveness to New Mills as well if you wish, JP.
Just for you.
5
Oh no, Geordie.
I’m very fond of the hairy biker lookalike.
7
😮!!!
4
Your a monster.
I hope the ghost of Roal Matt tampers with you when you’re in bed.
6
Moat.
Auto correct fuckin know it all.
5
Stockport is alright.
Apart from all the Manchester City fans there…
3
Give over, you daft lump!
You’d spur us on, wouldn’t you?
6
The Plaza cinema in Stockport is nice.
Booked tickets to see Kes early next year.
4
Yeah?
Be good that!
Might have a bit of that myself.
Art deco.
Stockport plaza.
Looks nice all lit up at night.
3
Fascist
5
Look out for Mis in his Lederhosen, dragging Angie off to a witch burning.
0
Obedience is suicide.
4
Obedience is a great sauce on smashing bangers, as Barry points out.
5
No, jumping in shark infested water is suicide.
Obedience is how you get a kiss off the missus ❤️
8
I followed the rules tonight on opening a bottle of Chipotle bbq sauce for my sausages.
And I’m alive to tell you it complemented them wonderfully, unlike the sweaty tub of lard in Macedonia.
8
Good man.
Point away from eyes/face when opening.
Simples!
7
Got the village bonfire tomorrow night, it must be about 25ft high at the moment and every year people are reminded its only for garden waste and wood but every year there will be some arsewipes who will take the piss and chuck a sofa or something on it.
6
Old mattresses and such.
I hate Bonfire night.👎
And do a little jig when I hear of some simpleton getting hurt.
The Stepping hill hospital burns ward is like the Edinburgh fringe festival for me.
9
Mongs letting off fireworks…
Some poor dog died after fireworks made it have a stroke.
And two wood pigeons also died due to fireworks.
What is it about British scum and fireworks? It’s like setting fire to money. And the fucking imbeciles let them off for days, before and after November 5th. Bastards.
12
I have my own version of that, Miserable.
When a particularly mouthy or two faced cunt in the kidney unit ends up in the ICU for weeks, because of their own stupidity and eating/drinking way too much shite, And they do this with regularity, usually at this time of year.
I find that incredibly satisfying and I savour their absence.. Ony drawback is they come back.
4
Play it smart Norm,
Plant the seed.
Hum or whistle chocolate jingles
Or say
” Hey remember cabana/ amazing raisin/ old Jamaica
Get them thinking about chocolate
Thinking leads to craving
Craving leads to bingeing 😁
4
And I have no time for those cunts who say when these unpleasnt fuckers are away. ‘Awww. They’re not well.’
And what? The cunts know the rules. No eating shit, no boozing, a strict fluid intake. Joke is, these twats are diabtetic as well as being on dialysis. Yet they stll do it. The deserve all they get. The fact that these bastards (both wimmin, I might add) suffer because of their own bad habits and lack of brains only brings me joy.
6
Always some bottom feeders who need to ruin it for everyone else.
I wonder how much of their meagre benefits money the sainted poor have spent on fireworks over the last month? If it wasn’t for their sacrifice I’d be left with nothing but peace and quiet of an evening for the last month.
I expect they will get a seasonal increase next year to cover the cost.
Starmer will fix it……
7
Same old faces,
Food bank diners,
Can’t pay the bills,
But think nothing of spunking £50 on fireworks.
Massive telly -kids only get breakfast at school
Nike trainers-not paid the rent
XL Bully – not had its jabs
The Feckless cunts
9
Food banks are a major mistake.
Open to abuse by britscum, who blow all their free money on Sky TV, lottery, Playstations for their scum offspring, booze, cigs, foreign holidays and, of course, fireworks.
Then the vermin will get fed at the food bank. A known fact that this happens. 24 karat scum.
9
I think they should have a special task force, checking out addresses of folks on benefits. If they light so much as a sparkler they should lose their benefits.
That moneys for basic survival, not entertainment.
12
I’d flood the market with dangerous Chinese knock offs only.
Little Henleys hands a mangled stump?
Little mercedes had one explode in her face?
Shame.
Try being fuckin quiet for 10 minutes.
Teach them brail and the importance of welding gauntlets.
7
OT. But come on, Donald.
I want to see the likes of Taylor Swift and Wee Willie Eilish combust if the Big D wins. Eilish exploding might improve her looks.
Not to mention British celebricunts like Lineker, Cuntberbatch and Tennant.
I want to witness the mass tantrum and crying if he does win.
13
Fingers crossed Norman. If The Donald wins he will phone Farage before Starmer and I hope Farage never tires of reminding the cunt about it.
10
Here’s hoping. Liberal.
Kamala Knickerless will probably invite Taylor Swift to actual Pentagon and Congess discussions to add her ‘expertise’.
7
Don’t be a smelly, unwashed cunt on the bus — they do.
5
That TV show, Eight Simple Rules.
Katey Sagal as the ultimate MILF.
5