Osteoarthritis

Posted on by


is a cunt. A fucking painful cunt.

I am certain that I won’t be the only cunter on here to suffer with this disease and maybe others may agree with my synopsis.

I have suffered for around twenty years with this painful cunt predominantly in my knees at first; probably from playing quite a lot of football.

However, it no longer just lives in my knees, I have 2 or 3 cortisone steroid injections in both each year and this does helps them. But no the bastard now affects my wrists fingers, (every fucking knuckle as what appears to be horns protruding from them) elbows and hips and fucking ankles.

Painkillers and anti inflammatory drugs help thank fuck.
I am now in my early sixties and will have to live with this pain for the rest of my natural.

Why cunt it today? simple reason it is now getting colder(fuck off global alarmists it is) and this makes it even worse.

On return from my early morning dog walk in a cold wind I fucked off back to bed for an hour because of the pain. This is not what I wish to do. I’d soon be playing golf.

Osteoarthritis it is a proper cunt. And I for one hate it.

academic

Nominated by Everyonesacunt.

61 thoughts on “Osteoarthritis”

  1. Get hold of some pure organic cannabis and make butter out of it. But specifically buds that have been grown for an extra few days, so most of the THC in the trichomes (the resin glands) will have turned into CBD.
    It’s an extremely good anti-inflammatory.
    And once a month, do water fasts for 40 hours or so.
    I do both of these and, at 51, can stlll easily run 10 miles.
    Do you have a healthy diet, everyonesacunt? Mostly free of processed food?
    Apart from that, you’ll simply have to lay off the port, fine cigars and foie gras.

  4. People often look shocked when I get off my bike and extend my elbow crutch. Some days getting out of bed is a challenge combined with the mental health problems days can be fucking atrocious.. Thank God for painkillers and all the other crap I have to take.
    Osteoarthritis is a nasty bastard that creeps up on you as you age. The only advantage that I have over many sufferers is I was smashed to fuck age 20 so have lived with this for longer than most and was aware of the joys to come. Still a bastard when out and you twist awkwardly in a crowded shop, can’t help swearing
    This problem is bad, your whole life can be turned on it’s head because pain is a real bitch. E is spot on with the weather last year we hit 40.3 C at Conningsby which is four miles from my humble abode. Has no aches or pains hardly at all that day. Dreading the winter.

    • I’ve had this for thirty years but nowhere near as bad as you Ev. I still walk miles and get by on eight Co-codamol tablets a day.

  6. I sympathise with you fellow cunter. I’ve had the other one, rheumatoid arthritis for half my life. I’m in a bit of remission at the moment and I think its well deserved, seeing I’ll be touching 80 next year with a bit of luck. My hands are twisted to fuck also, but thinking they wouldn’t get any worse the have. Won’t tell you what I can’t do any longer, but to my achievement I can still ride my bicycle.

  7. I think our batsmen must be suffering with this, watching them getting bummed by Afghanistan in the World Cup right now.

    • Shame they couldn’t replace the balls with hand grenades and deliver some carpet riders directly into Allah’s waiting talons.

      • The state of our bowling ‘attack’, they’d have missed the smelly cunts and chucked the grenades straight into their own dugout.

    • Nowt wrong with me.

      Picture of health.

      You’ll get lots of quack remedies on here Everyonesacunt.

      Drug addicts like Cunt Engine will tell you to take drugs.
      Ignore that.
      It might releive the symptoms but you’ll start wearing flares and calling people ‘daddio’ in no time.

      Jelly pal.
      Eat plenty of jelly,
      Jelly babies, wine gums etc.

      It’s made with gelatine(duh) that helps with hair and nails and lubes you up a bit.

      Oh an a hot water bottle.

      • ‘lubes you up a bit’?

        Are you sure you haven’t been taking advice from Mr Cunt Engine?

      • Cheers Man, daddio, far out catch your drift pass the spliffff

        Fuck me Mis I’ve followed Thomas’s suggestions and now I need re hab. Where’s Amy ?

      • Afternoon MNC, CB…as you’re so against drugs, are you sure you weren’t bummed by a naughty man back in the 80’s after he offered you a toke on his joint then interfered with your budding beard and tinkle when your brain was otherwise engaged?!

      • Tried all sorts in my younger years TCE. Weed (never got into it, just made me feel lazy, hungry and smelly), ees (great, but they stop working so well after a bit – horrible downers on a Monday too), beak (dangerous as fuck, very addictive and expensive but makes you feel like King Kong.) Tried Ketamine once. Fuck that. Oh and mushrooms. Had a bad one and a few good ones, but never got into it.

        Gave it all up in my early 30s. Still know a few in their 50s who still go to raves. Taking EE’s etc. I think that’s fucking ridiculous myself, but hey.

        Each to their own n that.

      • Heehee😁

        If I find any of the older ISAC strung out or ODd in the canteen ,
        I’ll report you to admin.

        I’ve got my eye on you Zammo.👁️

      • You fucker!
        Zammo! 😆
        I just pissed myself laughing and my 12 year old son is quizzing me about why I’m laughing so much…I’m going to tell him about Grange Hill and the secret love between Ro-land Browning and Gripper Stebson…I also might make up a lie or two about when Mr Bronson kept Danny Kendall in detention until 10pm…for an entirely innocent reason.

      • Hahaha 😄
        That’s what happened to Spoonington I think.
        You giving him Chinese rocks in the bogs,
        Then when his lips turned blue,
        You panicked and put him in a wheelie bin.

        Your a bad man Thomas😁

      • I rolled him up in a carpet, actually.
        After bumming him into the middle of next week. Then put the carpet in a supermarket trolley in the middle of a multistorey car park.
        Don’t worry though, I made sure his naked bottom half was hanging out of the carpet.

  9. My uncle started with this years ago when in his early 30s.

    Fit as a flea, played football, walked for miles and still tries to, even though he probably shouldn’t.

    He’s been on painkillers ever since and can barely move without them.

    Poor cunt.

    Yes this condition really is a cunt.

  11. Sorry to hear of your condition Everyonesa, old age can be a cunt for some.
    I can empathise with you though, not because of me but my going on 87 year old mother who lives at home and wants to die at home also.
    Pain is an understatement to what her buckled knees and collapsed hips with no separation anymore for those steroid injections to give some sort of relief.
    A three wheeler is all she can struggle on with one leg that wants to wrap around the other so she skates on the timber floor to get to the living room chair where she spends the whole day watching the youtube on the telly. She’s an expert on quizzes
    House bound since 2017 except the few times a visit to another specialist at £300 a pop and the last visit was some 15 miles away and the journey in the crv nearly killed her,
    Hates the pain killers and she’s tried them all as they either zone her out or make her stomach queasy.
    My work life is all over the shop as its breakfast, dinner and tea for me, mind you she eats hardly ant of it.
    I could go on and on , hope you find some relief

  12. I can sympathise with this 100%. Diagnosed 20 years ago. It doesn’t improve with age.

    It’s a right cunt.

    OT. I see someone has been arrested at that there London demo for Palestine.

    Apparently, the cunt was waving a Union Flag.

    Where the fuck does he think he is ?

    Get back to where you came from !

    You cunt.

    Oh wait a minute…..hang on.

    • Evening Jack, being serious for once, I must say that the thought of getting seriously old horrifies me!

      • @Thomas. Me and Ethel have been visiting my uncle today. He’s 96, lives on his own, looks after his own garden.
        He is not without his health problems.
        So what’s his secret ? I don’t know, but what I do know is that apart from being a hard bastard with the constitution of a lion, he has an extremely positive outlook and is always busy. He plays musical instruments, reads a lot and finds wonder in the simplest of things.
        In short, he doesn’t give up.
        Mother Nature will get him in the end, she always wins.
        But this man seems to have squeezed several lifetimes into one.
        I suppose the trick is, never, never never give up. Keep going and have a lust for life.
        He’s my role model.
        I love him to bits.
        Evening Thomas 👍

    • All the BBC’s current headlines are ‘Thousands in pro-Palestinian protest’. Well, every city in Britain is infested with camel shagging vermin….

      And it’s glaringly obvious (but no surprise) that the BBC is increasingly pro-Gaza, which means they are pro-Hamas. Bastards.

      • They can shovel as much of that pro Islam pro hamas pro Palestine shite as they like..

        It won’t save the wicked cunts come a reckoning.

        Good evening Norman,I hope you are well.

      • I’m not too bad Tez. Thanks for asking👍. The BBC is all but unwatchable now. Endless sob stories from Gaza, reports of pro-Palestinian ‘protest’, and what happened in Israel forgotten about.

  13. All this just goes to show what total cunts scientists are.

    I’ve just watched The Terminator and none of them had owt wrong with them.

    They can invent time travelling murder robots but can’t sort out arthritis.

    Cunts.

  14. Totally sympathise. Different source of pain to yours, but a bastard all the same.

    Trapped nerves in spine and hip sending fiery zinging spasms to hands and feet around the clock. I refuse to take the suggested zombie drugs so it is low dose codeine for me.

  15. Sympathies to you mate, I’ve been on pethidine for 30 years for chronic pancreatitis or I was till they stopped manufacturing it last October should be in production November the replacement has been useless.
    Plus you have to contend with the medical profession viewing you as a druggie because they don’t know your history. Pain on a daily basis is life sapping.

  16. Few weeks back after a hard job,
    My leg went.
    Felt like it was coming out of its socket,
    My balls ached
    And one cheek of my arse tingled,
    And I was limping.

    A bloke at the demolition yard said

    ” aye up Mis, what’s with the limp?”

    Told him I’d pulled it or strained it a few days back .

    ” Naw, you’ve got siatica kid” he said .

    Said he’d had it,
    And it’s a nerve runs down your back across your arse and down your leg.

    It rang true.
    I googled it and seemed to fit.

    Anyone have that?
    Know a lot of you are hypochondriacs.

    Anyway, if you keep moving it goes away after a few days.

    • I googled it too and it said that getting sciatica is the direct result of spending the evening with Kevin Spacey.

    • You have to watch that particular malady,it’s a right cunt if it’s bad enough..

      Sciatic nerve gets impinged,next news it’s like some Architect from Tower Hamlets has enriched your arse cheek and hamstring with a machete.

      You do have to try to stay active apparently but the Churchill Cure helped me recently..I took to my bed for an hour or two with some Scotch.

      Rule Brittania.

    • Sciatica is a right cunt mis get it occasionally and the pain/discomfort is proably worse than giving birth.

  17. I just ignored it.
    An it fucked off.

    That’s my philosophy for all life’s ills.

    It said to do exercises on Google ,
    But you try buying a leotard when you’re my size!!
    Impossible

    • With you on that one MNC, the ignoring part that is.
      I was about 30 so probably at peak strength and on a job with a 2 inch threaded GB fitting to remove and replace , I had the 18inch stillson to hold one part and a 24inch stillson to remove the cunt of a fitting flaxxed up to its bollox with compound.
      I left the blow torch at home which I would have normally used to heat up the joint and it would have walked off, but no I persevered
      Something tore inside of me as I was at max pressure trying to get a start at unwinding.
      I felt a bit grey driving home, I don’t no if it was my heart or my hernia
      and I never sought to find out.
      Took about a week to feel normal again.

      • It’s surprising Mecuntry how your body can heal and recover from things.

        And if your self employed you can work with your fuckin head hanging off.

        Never a days sick since self employed
        Worked with covid
        Worked with broken toes
        Worked with a snapped finger

        When on someone else’s dime I’d of took a month off for a splinter
        2 month for chapped lips.

      • Thats it Mis, Ive never been to a doctor in my whole life never felt the need, dont have one nor want one.
        The exception of course is hospital accident and emergency, with broken bones or in need of stitches.
        I had a few visits

  18. MJB@

    A fuckin book?!!
    Who’d you think I am?
    Woody Allen?

    The pain of paying £17 would hurt more than sciatica.

    • £17 is nothing compared to the relief it can bring you.
      Anyway, you can probably get it cheaper on eBay.
      I was paying £35 a session for physiotherapy and getting nowhere!

      • PS: In the edition I have there are pics of a fit bird doing the exercises, for those hard of reading, hee-hee…

      • It was a game changer for me after countless MRI’s, medical interventions and the like for herniated discs and full leg sciatica. It was so bad at one point I wanted the fucker amputated.

        The techniques in that book were a dog send.

      • I feel better already no need for expensive books.

        Few star jumps
        That sorts most things out.🙂

  20. Apart from the bloody kidney thing, my knees are close to fucked and all. They click like a Rubiks Cube, and a bit of cold and it’s like they’ve been frozen.😬

  21. Mentioned to the Lass, that her Mum was taking me and dog to the vets this week (just the annual boosters).

    I made a weak joke about Elder not having me put down just yet.

    “Oh no, Grand, you’re not using sticks yet”

    So that’s the benchmark, no sticks, you’re fine.
    Sticks! How fast can you run?

Comments are closed.