Matt Hancock (8) Fanboys

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A major mass cunting of the highest order to:

All stupid bastards cheering and championing Matt Hancock since he went into celebrity jungle!
These worthless pigs cunts seem to forget what this utter bastard put the country through the fuckin Hitler shitface.
This is what I was hoping would happen when I heard he was going into that shitty show.In this order:
1 That the plane taking him there would crash.
2. That the customs officers would check his arse for contraband.
3. That the car picking him up would crash.
4 That every other cunt in the jungle would spit Covid germs in his face.
5 That a poisonous snake would bite him and he would die live on TV
6. That a poisonous spider would bite him and he would die live on TV
7. That he would fall and die doing some shitty fucktucker trial.
8. That he would drown doing some shitty fucktucker trial.
9. That he would choke and die eating some kangaroo bollocks.
10. That Boy George would chain him up and bum him to death!!!!

No forgiveness ever.
May his stupid bint of a girlfriend run off with some big black bloke who looks like George Floyd.

Nominated by: Mr Bastardos

49 thoughts on “Matt Hancock (8) Fanboys”

  1. his girlfriend is doable, but I’m indifferent about him, he has no interest for me I don’t understand all this obsession about him,

  2. Fuck me,
    Bread and circuses.
    Who will they put in the jungle and cheer next?

    Baby P’s mum?
    Maxine Carr?

    Fred west would of pissed it.

    Matt Hancock is scum,
    Even mosquitoes won’t bite him!
    He makes malaria poorly!

  3. The cunt played a blinder. He got put up for all those trials and sailed through them without complaint. He spun out the sob stories while other cunts bitched behind his back. His only crime was “falling in love.” He knows, like any politician, the level of intelligence of the average voter, in this case Doris the housewife who has never heard of the wanker. You have to hand it to him, along with 400 fucking grand.
    I can see the Jellyfish rocking up next year, spouting off about the green environment and saving the planet.
    We are fucked.

  4. He’s no fool..realised that Tory M.Ps are going to be rarer than hen’s teeth after the next election and moved with indecent haste to set the groundwork for a Michael Portillo-style media career.

    • ‘Great British tales of Elderly Genocide’

      Presented by Matt Hancock.

      I can see it now.

      • …or a series where Matt and Baroness Mone front a “Dragon’s Den” style show where they shovel vast amounts of taxpayer cash into off-shore accounts for dodgy/imaginary PPE provided by their friends/family or local Pub Landlord
        ” Shameless” will do as a working title..

      • Apparently he’s written a book.

        ‘Stooping the secretary’ is said to be a modern classic.

        Further works planned include ‘How to get rich whilst others die trying’, ‘Zen and the art of child maintenaince’ and ‘The great Twatsby’.

        Until utter scum like him are held to account for the people they have killed, and to those they have impoverished, bankrupted, bullied and deceived, they will keep doing it

        I honestly believe he should be executed.

    • I loathe this hypocritical wanker and the only media I would watch is his beheading by some muzzie cunt on You Tube.

    • @FF. Fast forward two years and we’ll be approaching our first Christmas under the new Labour government.
      The horror…… the horror.
      A sobering thought for a gloomy Monday.
      Morning, Dick.

      • Mornin’ Mr Fiddler,

        I am hoping the cons get utterly decimated and Labour get in. After a couple of years of that horror, hopefully the electorate will have not forgiven the cons, realise Labour are utterly useless and equally corrupt and elect a properly representative democracy.

        A childish dream, I know.

      • morning Termujin. I shall probably vote “ Reform Party “ some may say a wasted vote . I just can’t bring myself to vote for any of the other Shysters

      • Morning Mr Fistula,

        TBH I think democracy is a busted flush. Starts off bad, goes downhill from there.

        Reform seems reasonable, but it’s not really reform we need. It doesn’t really matter who is in power if the civil service holds such power, they’ll just actively sabotage anyone half decent.

        We need, need, to be holding these scumbags to account. Start emptying bank accounts, seizing assets as the proceeds of crime, massive prison sentences and even executions, it’s that serious, people have died or had their lives ruined because of these weasels. No enfranchisement until 25 years old, and then only for those who are net contributors. Start governing the nation for the benefit of its people, instead of the people for the benefit of the government.

      • Afternoon,Termujin.

        I genuinely wonder where it’ll all end…I don’t think people have ever been so disillusioned with our political class….trouble is,there is no credible alternative to Labour or Conservative and I expect many people will be like me and just stop bothering to vote…it’s the same shite whatever colour of rosette it has pinned to it’s chest.

  5. I was hoping for a rare version of Ebola to sweep through the film set but it came to naught.

    The little cunt can fuck off.

  6. I was personally hoping that a combination of fate No.6 & No.10 would befall Matt Handjob at the same time. (With said spider then turning it’s attention to radiator bummer Boy George)

    There are very few people in life I wish bad tidings on. Matt Hancock is definitely and exception to this and I hope an eternity of misery upon the man who helped inflict suffering on the British people whilst he broke lock down rules to cheat on his family with some eye-tie slut.
    Cunt.

  7. Savvy alright.
    He’s got the instincts and self preservation of a rat.

    I’ve disliked this cunt pre-covid,
    He always looked like a disgruntled schoolboy in press interviews.
    On the verge of tears.

    Now he’s repackaging himself as the new Philip Schofield?!

    Vote for me or kill your granny?

    What a fuckin Rotter.

  8. Putting this man on prime time idiot lantern was an exercise in extreme bad taste and gaslighting in equal measure.

    • My father called it the lunatic’s lantern, absolutely refused to watch it.

      Apart from Match of the day, pre-woke Jimmy Hill version.

  9. Though I will put it out there…

    If you could give a sound thrashing to either Hancock, or ant and dick?

    I’m kicking gobshite midgets arse’s all day long.

  10. Hancock and his advisors probably thought long and hard before committing himself to this modern-day gladiatorial circus (sans the lions unfortunately).

    He has clearly burnt his bridges in terms a return to politics, but you just never know. You only have to look at past MPs, ministers and PMs who have dalliances outside of marriage (Major and Curry certainly rings out)

    But even if he has shut the door on politics it seems he is trying to reinvent himself into the entertainments industry. And even though he was massively criticised by the MSM and politicians he manned up, did the trials, tolerated the back-stabbings and ended up finishing 3rd behind a couple of vacuous nobodies.

    It would also seem the viewing public have warmed to him because of it, while also giving the likes of Boy George the cold shoulder for being an arrogant, two-faced cunt.

    Give it a couple of years and The Cock could well be doing a Michael Palin or a Portillo, travelling the world in yet another docusoap about how other people live and getting paid handsomely for it.

    A cunt for sure, but then again trying to find an honest politician is like trying to find a person of colour in Lord Fiddler’s estate!

    • There are far worse people than Hancock who have been in Parliament,. According to yesterday’s Sunday Times Charlie Elphicke may be prosecuted for serious sexual assault and two others on the Conservative side and one on the Labour side, all unnamed, may face similar charges.

  11. Hancock is going through an expensive divorce and needs every penny he can get . He doesn’t give a fuck about going on this shit show and humiliating himself .
    I do fantasise about his girlfriend giving me a stand up wank while giggling and making light of it

    • It does make you wonder who is worse.
      The cunts who make this shit, or the cunts that watch and enjoy it…

      • Common criminals, yes…
        White collar, granny murdering criminal bastards like Mr Midazolam here?

        He’s their type of criminal, and there’d be competition between the rooshaggers and their sheepshagging Kiwi cousins to welcome the geronticidal bastard to their respective ‘utopias’.

  16. When will the British people have had enough and pile all these useless self-serving wankers in a large pile – petrol can, match, and a wonderful bonfire we can all stand around and keep warm. I include all these cunts in this, Tory, labour, green twats and the cunting SNP – Blackstock at the front (enough fat on hom to crackle away for weeks).
    The public seem like weak, mamby pamby tools, can’t be bothered to make a fuss. We should all be fuming, pitchforks and torches in hand, roaming the streets, looking for the bastards who’ve put us in this mess.
    Some food has doubled in price (let alone this 12% inflation bollocks).
    Diesel has finally gone down 11p a litre (whoopy do!) by me, but at £1.78 per litre, is 23p dearer than Petrol still.
    We are being taken for fools by the Elites

  18. Slightly off topic but our future Prime Minister Keir Starmer was being interviewed on TV this morning. What a slimy bastard. He makes Matt Hancock look sincere. He was going on about 12 years of Tory mismanagement forgetting the 13 years of mismanagement of his Labour Government. 25 years of wasted opportunity, total ineptitude and callous disregard for the indigenous UK population. Fuck both of them, we need proper change.

  19. The underclass is easily won over by spectacle and celebrity. It’ why we have the shite in parliament that we do.

    • You put it better than me, I was just wondering how someone can make large numbers of people apparently forget about all the evil thing they’ve done, just by participating in a brain dead game show. I thought at first it was more that people could enjoy watching the cunt eating locusts or maggots but seemingly some people now regard him as a hero and all is forgiven. It never ceases to amaze me how fucking thick some people are.

  22. Only in the chav infested fleahole that is the UK would a cunt like Hancock be treated like a celebrity freakshow after what he has done. Absolutely astonishing. Only in this shithole….

    There will be murderers, rapists and joe ronces on that ‘I’m A Celebrity’ soon enough. Those mekon knobheads, Cunt and Dec will be introducing Ian Huntley, Levi Bellfield, and Beverley Allit, and the hordes of Britscum who watch this shite will absolutely lap it up…

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