The larger than life cunt first really hit the screens with the character of Fancy Smith in Z Cars. Remember that cunters – ’60s ’70s police series in B/W bombing around in Ford Zephyrs? Or at least until the engine mounts rusted through and the motor hit the tarmac. Fords were particularly shite in those days. Happy memories:
https://classic-cars-welcome.co.uk/ford-zephyr-and-zodiac
Re Blessed: Warning to the general public AVOID THIS CUNT. He has a voice like a foghorn, eats garlic and his farts could could launch a spaceship to Mars. Toured the cunt in a musical production of Hard Times, another “Dickens Classic” that dies on its arse. Think the title might have something to do with it? I wanted to call it Louisa and The Paedo. Money Management would not have it changed. Simple truth is Dickens does not attract except at Christmas in shows you can drop a bit of fake snow on stage (ie A Christmas Carol or God Bugger You Tiny Tim).
Amazing thing about Blessed is he has a delightfully sweet light tenor singing voice but the rest is all downhill. No other actor will share a dressing room with him because of the stench and his wierd warm-up routines. Gale strength renditions of his lines, deep breathing and farting and endless anecdotes such as the time he was constipated at 20 000ft on Everest. Plus the feet stink.
Over the top in life and over the top in performance.
Does a lot of voice overs (although the word is the voice on Flash Speed Mop is a cheaper clone), digital games and so on but less derring do such as Everest now he is an old cunt with a bizarre henna coloured beard.
Nominated by: Sir Limply Stoke
I know only 2 words that old Brian there has ever spoken……”Birdmen, DIVE!!”. From the 1980 Flash Gordon film 😀
15
This cunt tried to climb Everest, must also be a totally stupid unrealistic cunt as well. Mind you his dead body would have been a useful marker on the way to the summit I guess. Sadly he turned back before it was too late. Apparently it was just outside a hotel in Kathmandu
13
I’m not cunting Brian Blessed!!
Hes fuckin ace!
Big, booming, bearded, a man who (so he ways) punched a bear, attempted to climb Everest.
He stands head and shoulders above the rest of those boardtreading little puffs in the West End.
Gordon’s alive! Hes a proper eccentric English man!
Rip down Nelson Mandela’s statue and put up one of Brian!
38
Says not ways.
6
He was brilliant as the king in the first (Ben Elton free) Black Adder…
“HAVE YOU LOST YOUR CONKERS?”
16
A passionate defence Miserable, the unconventional beard aficionados of Britain must stick together.
12
Too right LL!
Whether bullying Edmund Blackadder, or attacking Ming the Merciless,
Ive enjoyed his antics,
Probably the only straight bloke in showbiz!!
20
Agreed MNC – I simply can’t cunt the King of the Hawkmen – especially as his voice is identical to mine! (no jest – it is!)
“We’re over France in the Spitfires Group Captain Fox – DIVE”!
13
Agreed. Brian’s antics and performances since my childhood have been great and admired. It’s a little sad to see him stoop to advertising these days. That said, he’s too much of a relic to get any more BBC work I guess.
7
This is the weirdest, most fortuitous cunting ever. I’m currently switching screens between ISAC and an RPG game called Kingdom Come: Deliverance and he plays a character in the game called Konrad Kyeser (an eccentric nutcase oddly enough).
My Dad has always had a bad feeling about Brian Blessed and reckons the old fucker could be a nonce but nothing is proven and I’m not sure what his hunch is based on but if BB is then we’ll find out after he carks it Jimmy Saville-style.
I’ll finish with a Blessed quote from Thomas The Tank Engine – “GORDON’S ALIVE????!!!”
7
Farken hell he looks like an older version of me. Was he in Oz when my “dad” was fighting the North Viets?
10
His feet stink and he is a farter – hilarious 🙂 Do you have dirt on any other stars that you can share with us Sir Limply?
10
If he has sweaty feet & can fart like a lighthouse foghorn then for a luvvie he can’t be bad. It’s probably just professional jealousy on the part of the board treading duckies who smell suspiciosly of some exotic gäy French perfume mixed with ânäl lûbe and have had their sphincters bashed in so often they sh!t themselves when they try to let rip.
For a Yorkie, I like him. Outspoken against animal cruelty plus he’s not afraid to take the p!ss out of himself (or his profession).
15
I’ll take Brian Blessed any day over Emma Thompson.
11
Ive heard Emma Thompson farts and stinks of garlic too Cuntologist!
9
….and that’s just her front bottom☹️
8
There’s a droll response to that somewhere. I just can’t think what it is at the moment…
4
” The length of my rod is a mystery to all but the Queen and a thousand Turkish whores ! ”
Good old Brian.
I’d pay good money to see him punch Eddie Izzard to fuck.
Good afternoon.
38
Before departing for the Crusades…
“As the lord God said,
Love thine enemy as thy self.
Unless he’s Turkish, in which case kill the bastard…”
20
@Baron Bastard You have the same initials as Brian Blessed. Coincidence? I think not. 😛
10
I’m not him I’m afraid. Nowhere near as old or podgy and my beard is much smaller.
I am however becoming more and more convinced that one of our regular cunters is Jeremy Clarkson…
3
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
4
“CHISWICK!! FRESH HORSES!!!”
2
Jack@
I’d love a few beers with Brian!
Listen to his tales,( both true and bollocks)
He strikes me as entertaining company for the boozer?
Add Keith Moon Olly Reed and a assortment of midgets,
Perfect night out! 👍
18
That would indeed be quite a night. Throw in Robert Newton and Richard Harris and it would probably be unsurvivable.
🍺🍺🍺🍺🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷💥💥🔥🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷💥💥🔥👍
12
Afternoon JTC – I’ll chip in a tenner for that! (And that’s a years wage in darkest Yorkshire!) 😃👍
6
A King’s ransom indeed, Vernon. Not an old tenner is it ?
😀
3
I like Brian Blessed. That is all.
13
He used to be funny because he was a loud, bombastic actor but then he became a loud, bombastic Remainer.
9
Remoaners like Patrick Stewart and Richard Dawkins are people I used to hold in high regard until they started remoaning.
I have to clarify by the way, do you mean remainer or remoaner? I only ask because there is a difference (although the difference seems to be reducing on a daily from my observation).
Of myself and the other 5 people in my immediate family, the only person who is a remainer is my older, gen-x, grauniad-reading (yes even though he i s44) ex-student brother.
Four years ago after the referendum he told my Dad he voted to leave, but since Covid (which I guess in his lefty remoaner mind can be blamed on Brexit) he’s started to make snipey, passive-aggressive jokes about Brexiteers like “they tuk err jerrrbs!” and he actually did that at a family meet-up post-lockdown. What a fucking cock!
7
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-jxiXCvPZY Best 2 words ever!
4
Yes, there is a difference and that difference sorts the democracy-haters from the democracy-accepters. As far as I know he had a moan AFTER the result so he’s a Remoaner. A loud, fat, Remoaner cunt.
I never liked Dawkins, the snidey little shit-bag. Lacked every bit of charm, grace, and humour that Hitchens oozed with ease. Hitch probably would have been a reluctant Remainer himself, alas.
4
I agree that Hitch would have been a reluctant remainer, he also seemed to be a reluctant trot considering that I never even knew, until his pre-death interview with Paxman, that he was a lifelong trot and still considered himself to be such.
I’ve noticed that both Christopher and Peter Hitchens were/are arrogant, conceited pricks who like(d) the sound of their own voices, and although I have become more conservative and rightwing as I’ve aged……. I still prefer Chris to Pete; no contest at all.
4
I don’t see Dawkins as a Remoaner. In fact the only time I’ve seen him express an opinion on Brexit was in a Remain campaign video at the time of the referendum. Didn’t make me respect his valuable contribution as scientist and author any less then, and it doesn’t now. Besides, anyone who can pull Lalla Ward can’t be all bad, jammy bastard!
3
@Ruff Tuff Creampuff
First rule of being around a bunch of American atheists is don’t ask a nerdy, specky, Mr Potato Head-looking bird out for coffee in an elevator.
Second rule of being around a bunch of American atheists is that you are probably around a bunch of lefty, litigious, activist cunts (who the fuck would have a gathering of other people purely to not believe in something)? CUNTS! That’s who!
0
Pardon me for having an opinion. 😳
5
@Ruff Tuff Creampuff
Incase you didn’t see this reply because it was posted outside of the thread for some reason.
@Ruff Tuff Creampuff
Holy shit Mate calm down! I know I’m a bit of a contrarian/cuntrarian (slight understatement) but I was actually agreeing with you but just putting my own anti-collectivist, anti-lefty, anti-american spin on it. Don’t take it personally.
0
Dawkins was nudging Lalla Ward??
Fucking hell. The jammy cunt!!
1
Tom Baker’s sloppy seconds anyone? 😆😆😆
1
Forget it TiTS.
As the great man* once said:
“The stars are matter. We are matter. But it doesn’t matter.”
* Not Dawkins.
1
Google Richard Dawkins Brexit Ruff. He’s said far more than that.
2
Takes a cunt to spot a cunt. I bet he’s on here.
1
Can’t support this. Blessed is a fucking legend.
13
Long overdue cunting by an informed cunter. The cunt Blessed is often wheeled into R4 studios to be the acceptable face (sic) of jocular professional eccentricity; overblown thesp whose broadcast bellow will destroy good audio kit and whose pomposity exceeds even my own occasional excesses. Devoid of wit, grace and self awareness, this cunt scores a good 9 on the Blair Cunt Index, and this cunting is enthusiastically endorsed.
I sense some disagreement here. The trick is to listen to a cunt without watching his misleading mannerisms: it’s much harder to disguise your cuntitude from someone who’s only going by your voice. I’ve only heard the cunt. Whose voice has an unmistakeable resemblance to Stephen Fry’s…
5
Damn it Komodo! I was really hoping for a moment that the “Blair Cunt Index” was actually a thing but I couldn’t find it anywhere via Google. You hope-tease you!
As mentioned in my previous post about Kingdom Come: Deliverance – the game I’ve been playing for the last 6 months, this clip of BB makes him seem no less cunty.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CWdx0o8mrAY
1
I liked him when he had Viking get up on with some angel wings.
Never seen him since.
6
Apparently he is good to animals. And that is why I can’t support this cunting.
7
Subscriber or Frank Tufano are you?
1
I don’t buy things advertised on tv but if I did, I wouldn’t buy products endorsed by him on principle.
Talentless shouty twat.
1
@Allan I agree! Although I don’t just dislike Frank Tufano for the reasons you mentioned but for the fact that he is a carnivore and they are just as stupid, ignorant and dogmatic as some vegans seem to be.
I’ve had debates with both on Youtube and they are both as uniformed and thick-as-fuck as each other trust me.
0
Makes far too much noise for my liking. However, many seem to enjoy his boisterous antics. I give him the benefit of the doubt.
6
A quick look on Wikipedia says he’s 84. I never thought he was as old as that.
3
For sure Fords used to rust in the 50s/60s but nothing like Vauxhalls which collapsed like wet cardboard. You regularly saw them with huge holes in the bodywork and the headlights dangling on wires.
Mind you French and Italian cars were not made for our climate either. They were all rust boxes.
3
British Leyland were the cars you could watch going brown. Built by the only fucker awake on the night shift. With a hammer for the bolts.
Blessed is a shouty Yorkshire cunt.
4
If what I’m to understand of American Fords in the 60’s and 70’s is true then my all-time favourite car the Ford Mustang Boss 429 fastback is also a rusty pile of shit.
Probably explains why the only ones that survived were ones in hot, dry states like California, Nevada and Arizona.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LlKkds2Lhx8 if you can’t wait, jump to 0:48
Even my Dad who was a petrol head in his younger days back in the 70’s said “Best sound ever!”
0
@Ruff Tuff Creampuff
Holy shit Mate calm down! I know I’m a bit of a contrarian/cuntrarian (slight understatement) but I was actually agreeing with you but just putting my own anti-collectivist, anti-lefty, anti-american spin on it. Don’t take it personally.
1
If what I’m to understand of American Fords in the 60’s and 70’s is true then my all-time favourite car the Ford Mustang Boss 429 fastback is also a rusty pile of shit.
Probably explains why the only ones that survived were ones in hot, dry states like California, Nevada and Arizona.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LlKkds2Lhx8 if you can’t wait, jump to 0:48
Even my Dad who was a petrol head in his younger days back in the 70’s said “Best sound ever!”
0
GORDON’S ALIVE?!?!?One trick pony
2
DIVE!!!!
Two tick pony
0
Trick, not tick
0
I disagree.
Played Augustus in I, Claudius. Was brilliant in the first Blackadder. Also in Blake’s 7 and was in Dr Who where he got with the lovely Nicola Bryant (crap actress but fantastic tits). Great on HIGNFY when it was watchable.
I bow to Sir Limply’s theatrical inside knowledge but unlike most actors, he seems alright and not up himself.
If you type the words ‘actor synonym’ into a search engine, the first hit is ‘complete and utter cunt.’
4
I’m still on the fence.
I want to like him but he’s an actor so he’s probably a lefty (haven’t researched that much if I’m honest), probably a remainer (possibly remoaner although I haven’t researched that much if I’m honest).
The fact that he’s played a character in a game (which I admittedly like) by a small Czech game development studio which doesn’t pay much doesn’t necessarily mean that he needed the money for drugs and booze!
0
I’m still on the fence.
I want to like him but he’s an actor so he’s probably a lefty (haven’t researched that much if I’m honest), probably a remainer (possibly remoaner although I haven’t researched that much if I’m honest).
The fact that he’s played a character in a game (which I admittedly like) by a small Czech game development studio which doesn’t pay much doesn’t necessarily mean that he needed the money for drugs and booze!
0
@Admin please delete this redundant comment.
0
I love Brian. I must watch that awesome Flash Gordon film. 🙂
p.s. I wonder what his favourite cake is.
3
He’s got a voice that can crack glass
I like the bloke & go with MNC Pull down the statue of Mandela and put one up of Brian 👍
1