Earlier this week I was doing the weekly shop and at the checkout there is a young-ish couple in front trying to pay at the till using Apple Pay*
Unfortunately for them neither of their phones would work on the contactless scanner. So at this point you’d think they’d whip out the credit cards/debit cards or cash and pay the old fashioned way…right?
No. Like the Her Maj the Queen, neither of them carry money.
“Dean, you’ll have to go check in the car babe, see if my purse or credit card is in the car”.
By this time the queue is becoming a conga line. Her phone rings. It’s Dean, I expect he said something along the lines of “There’s no purse in the car babe”. At this point he must have gone home to get some actual physical method of payment, leaving the wannabe Towie star girlfriend to wait with the shopping.
Fortunately, the checkout supervisor sees whats going on and puts the shopping to one side so the rest of us can carry on with out lives.
Why in the fuck would you leave the house to go shopping without money or a credit/debit card.
What also vexed me was their persistence in calling each other “Babe”.
Fuck off with that shit. It reminded me of ‘ickle Maaark Owen from TakeThat, singing a Dogawful song of that same name back in 1994 and I had flash backs from it. “The horror…..the horror.”
*Other mobile payment service are available.
Nominated by: Harold Steptoe
well, yeah babe, but no babe, well, oh fuck babe – welcome to our anticipated new world order babe ……….. by the way babe, you have no fuckin’ say in anything ‘we’ want to do babe, we are the idiot dictatorship of what was formerly Great Britain, babe!
17
Wasnt ‘Babe’ the pig in the city?
Or am I thinking of Emily Thornberry?
13
I prefer cash.Big brother is watching us
26
Shrewd and insightful point Mr. Wallace!
We’ve seen the lengths the fucking government will go to in order to control…oops…lock down the public. But that pales in insignificance compared to them shutting down the banking system or simply rendering an individual’s debit/credit/cash/benefit card(s) inoperable. (For whatever reason they deem fit.)
17
If we didn’t have cash all those laundrettes would go out of business.
13
Babe is so Essex so chavvy.
ApplePay is so millennial.
These people base their whole lifestyles around the iPhone and so it wouldn’t have occurred to them that the system might not work in the supermarket.
Now and again even credit cards don’t work and so I like to keep a little cash handy. But you do wonder if it has a future. I think governments would like to get rid of cash to end the black economy and drug dealing.
Cash is not traceable .
19
Since March I’ve paid for most stuff in shops with contactless debit card. First time I’ve actually used it in fact.
Always carry at least £50 cash though.
Personally am strongly against the economy going cashless.
21
Ditto my friend.
Since the Yellow Peril I’ve been paying for everything with my debit card. (But I always have a “C” Note in my wallet.)
11
Afternoon General. 👍
“Be prepared” – that’s my motto. Not that I was ever in the scouts. One week as a cub was enough to put me off!
Further reading for anyone interested in the pros and cons of a cash-free society.
https://www.thebalance.com/pros-and-cons-of-moving-to-a-cashless-society-4160702
5
They’d love it,wouldn’t they ?
Anyone who “offended” the Authorities could just have their accounts frozen until they fell into line..it’d also be handy for them to be able to track and trace every Cunt’s movements and purchases.
Of course it would all be for our own good…to keep us all safe…and the biggest shame of it all?… most of the population will go along with it and trot out the pathetic “If you’ve got nothing to hide,you’ve got nothing to fear” as they are marched off to the Reeducation Camps.
Fuck them.
38
And we need to keep cash so Northumbrian gentleman farmers can pay their foreign mentals a shiny penny every day.
My Swiss banker is still pissed off with you and the Hounds, Dick. Chocolate-eating Nazi bastard that he is.
11
Spot on DF, turkeys voting for Christmas. I could never have imagined our civilisation would have sunk to such a level of self loathing and destruction but it has.
British values? How very oppressive.
12
With you Dick,
Cash is king.
I don’t invoice anymore, too many deadbeats, slow payers, its cash or find someone else.
The beancounters in goverment would bloody love it wouldnt they?
A cashless society!
Alright for them to fiddle like fuck, but hate the idea of mr average holding back a few quid!
Well fuck the parasites.
Ive taken a leaf from their handbook when it comes to accounts.
12
I say fiddler old chap does sound rather suspiciously like north korea or china the part about the re education camps
7
I’m in favour of contactless payment. Don’t enjoy having a wallet full of notes and the inevitable deluge of useless shrapnel cashiers give you.
We can have both though. It’s the fucking banks saying we can’t, moaning about ‘costs’, on instruction from above. Bitch, you usury cunts magic money out of nothing and charge interest (or fines) on that imaginary denomination, don’t even try.
If the BoE can afford to hold tons of physical gold underneath itself but only buy/sell the rights to the bar numbers, then highstreet banks can afford to keep their cash machines fucking stocked and hold cash in reserve in store.
10
It’ll be a sad day for illegal immigrants if we go completely cashless… they’ll have to make do with being paid in bananas.
13
Thought they earnt peanuts?😀
5
Stupid boy!
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Z9t_KDGqOmE
4
WTF will Pikey’s do without cash?? Fuck me the might end up paying taxes.
8
Pikeys don’t require cash. They steal everything. As a protected species they’re above the law.
19
Yes but they need to sell it. Or is there a large Pikey bizarre where they trade stolen goods?
4
TT HtB@ – yes there is – it’s called Appleby horse fair!
9
Cashless society, don’t earn enough social credits and your cash is turned off. Sell your car and tax is deducted before the digital currency enters your account. A cashless society is the end of the life we know.
It’s a great idea for the government and corporations but it’s a total dystopian nightmare for us.
15
Anyone that does any type of this paying by your phone shit has only got themselves to blame for blindly, mindlessly capitulating to what was always coming.
9
Cashless society means we are truly and absolutely fucked.
100 percent control over every aspect of your life.
Make no mistake.
14
The mistake’s already been made I’m afraid Herr Jelmet.
During the last 20 years, I’ve often pondered what it is that’s so transfixing and bewitching about these little rectangles that people walk around with in the palm of their hand, glued to looking at them at the expense of all previous social conventions.
Thank cunting fuck I’ve not come up with a convincingly positive answer.
6
I can remember when, “I’m off to bed” meant, “I’m off to bed”, not, “I’m off to stare at my phone in another part of the house”….
6
A cashless society could mean no more Albanian drug dealers, Romanian carwashes or “peaceful” cabdrivers. Maybe there IS a bit of light at the end of the tunnel.
9
A decent society would be rid of that vermin in the first place.
Push a Liberal under a truck week beckons.
6
HMRC are big fans of a cashless society
And that should be reason enough to continue using it , once we become a cashless society everything is open to inspection , gone are the days of having a deal and they will never return…..
You will be subject to tax on everything from the cradle to the grave, think it’s bad now? ….
16
HMRC can suck my balls.
Deals will still get struck without them cunts taking a cut.
Trade and barter was about before cash it cant be stopped by some nosey speccy pencil necked twat in whitehall.
6
Tipped the local binman* here a tenner yesterday for going above and beyond for taking something bulky and heavy away. Money well spent given the alternative hassle and expense.
How the fuck will that work if we go cashless?
* top blokes like so many others who haven’t had the credit they deserve for keeping things going day in / day out.
14
You could always suck them off.
1
How do you pay for a whore in a cashless society? (asking for a friend) Unless the cunts are going to take control over that and tax the fucking joy out of it.
Nah……too many rich corrupt cunts with politicians in their pockets for that to happen.
6
Try swiping your debit card on her snatch ?
8
Which side is the magnetic strip?
2
Whores accept American Express, don’t they? “That’ll do nicely sir, would you like to rub my tits?
6
The poverty of the babe and babess sickens me. Oven please for this pair of twats.
2
Bank account closed, job gone and no benefit payments for refusing “voluntary” vaccine.
No entry to shops or public buildings unless masked.
No access to services or medical treatment unless test and monitor, sorry “trace” app is on your phone.
Masks in public and arrest for any not complying.
Fines for being out in public in the wrong number or area or time.
Covid marshalls checking households for compliance and arranging appropriate arrests.
All coming our way in the very near future, as is serious civil unrest.
I have tolerated, grudgingly, being ordered around, lied to and filled with shit by the elite with an agenda and simply do not believe they are doing this for any other reason except controlling the people.
15
Well said Foxy.
👍👍
Unless your one of their gang then its “no further action”.
2
I agree completely Vern. There are dark and repressive days ahead for those who don’t comply and conform.
3
I am glad I am a member of the rebel alliance General!
2
Banks already ask you what the money is for, when you go “in-branch” for larger amounts than those available from the cash point.
They also report to HMRC any large deposits.
Agree with the comments about “Turkeys & Christmas”.
👎👎👎
5
It’s for fucking buying stuff, you stupid cunts, fuck off
1
If I was out with a woman and she called me ‘babe’ I’d smack her in the chops. I’m a fucking adult not a baby. Yet another Americanism I’m sick of hearing.
And talking about people holding everyone up at the checkout, what annoys me more than ever are those who spend five minutes carefully putting their purchases into bags before paying. All they’ve got to do is put their things into the trolley, pay up and move so that others can get served. They can pack their bags away from the checkout. Thoughtless cunts.
3
Aldi is more like it. Goods out of the trolley, onto the conveyor belt, scanned, and straight back into the trolley, pay, and get the fuck off out of the way. They even take cash.
I then empty the lot direct into the back of the car, get home, open the tailgate and tell the wife and boy to take it inside.
1
I nommed something similar the other day.
If you have political opinions which your bank doesn’t like, they can close your account.
Not a conspiracy theory btw. It happened this week to two people. They have never threatened, condoled or encouraged violence either.
Won’t be long until the gas, electric, internet and phone companies start cutting off those who aren’t ‘woke’ enough.
4
Track & Trace, is really Big Brother for the 21st Century.
Start with apps on phones that demand you activate your GPS at all times; bank cards, Internet of Things (Alexa & Cortana bitches), cookies, Smart meters, Oyster cards, passports, driving licences, broadband, 4G/5G…
They’re all part of the New Normal, tracking your every movement, what you say, what you did, where you’ve been, how much and who for….
Next thing it will be smart cards that you’ll need to enter shops, offices, libraries, public buildings, parks…
And if you don’t comply you’ll be “cancelled”
4
Cash is the best.
No digital trails and you can get aaaht of paying tax, and its also the favoured way of getting paid by criminal cunts…of course I know naffink abaaaaaht anyfink dodgy…simply commenting that’s all.
🏴☠️
1
I heard of someone who had a tax bill one year and had recently made a private sale cash in hand. That cash some may have considered subject to sales tax, GST, declarable as income etc, but not this person. It is said he paid the tax bill at the post office over the counter in the actual cash received from that transaction.
1
These fuckers want to get rid of cash so they have a digital trail of ALL transactions and then they can control who gets what and know how much money any cunt is worth.
They will also make a killing aaaht of transaction fees for doing nothing.
Things are really getting shite for the citizens of this country and unfortunately there are too many idiots as Harold Steptoe mentions in the cunting willing to fall in line.
2
FFS! https://twitter.com/saifedean/status/1317425950158630912
1
Three words: ‘negative interest rates’ Because Covid, their exorbitant charges for doing anything else not satisfying their endless greed, the cunts are now proposing to charge you for depositing your money with them. They have lower overheads than at any time in their lucrative history, having dispensed with human contact in the form of branches and people so that everything they do is digital and virtual except when it comes to screwing the customer.. They are fucking coining it…literally.
Your savings are the only really existing money in their possession, and they can leverage its value almost infinitely. And they want to charge you.
Which will be all the easier if money only exists as digital bits. The concept of using money as a recognised medium of exchange is actually inimical to current banking practice. The peasants cannot be allowed so much flexibility and freedom.
Babes? Oh, aye. We’re the Babes in the Woods.
3
During these fuckwitted times I have gone out of my way to pay cash ESPECIALLY when I see the sign “contactless preferred”. Fuck you get used to it last year you wouldn’t die touching cash and you fucking won’t this year. We are not here to have every tiny effort you make billed against us it’s a two way fucking street in fact without the customer it’s a no way fucking street so fack off.
2
At some burger barn I recently offered cash despite their card “preference”.
The (quite fit) girl looked at me as if I’d just told her I wanted to do her up the ginger behind the chip fryer.
Well I never said it, but yes, I did think it.
1
When working in the shop I notice some people paying with their mobile phone or watch. It boggles my mind. Is it magic? I remember writing cheques or signing a piece of paper when using a bank card and the shopkeeper has to check the signature.
Or that metal thing with carbon paper that makes a chunk-chunk sound across the bank card and paper
When their phones don’t work customers find their card or cash to pay instead.
Paying with cards and phones and watches. It seems even easier to spend money these days. I expect the next way to pay is by looking at a camera or using a fingerprint thing.
Chip and pin still works. I get the occasionally customers of a certain age who still have to sign as they don’t remember their pin number, or the American people who don’t do chip and pin if it is an American card. Then some get the hump with me if I don’t have a pen (I used to bring a pen in to work with me but it always went missing so I gave up).
2
P.s I didn’t notice the nomination picture until after I wrote a reply. What a twit I am.
Yes lots of ways to pay. I tell customers who have children, if they can’t afford to pay then the children must clean the shop chimneys*.
*chimbleys for our MNC 🙂
2