Ant & Dec
Never has there been a more nauseating, hammed up, simply not funny anymore, formulaic, sycophantic, repetitive, dumb ass, serving of light/zero entertainment headed by a couple of geordie chancers who if they weren’t cunts would have given it up years ago. All there shows are in the 10 season bracket who watches this big bag of steaming shite? What’s more they are universally supported and championed by the media and can do little wrong…..are the British public zombies who tune in to mong out? They all have the same PR as holly and phil…..please someone do us a favour and retire this lot so we can rip it up and start afresh with a talent show that is not completely devoid of charisma and delivered as if we are fuck wits. As far as cunts who make my piss boil this inner circle takes some beating and that is exactly what’s needed to knock some sense into the dross served up continuously like a conveyor of shite packaged differently but shite nonetheless. I’m done!
Nominated by RJ Cuntingham
They don’t bother me, I’ve never seen anything they were in, or presented.
18
I haven’t seen more than 5 seconds of the cunts. All I know is that the one on the right is a cunt, the one on the left is a cunt. What more is there?
30
Am gobsmacked you’ve actually heard of them!
7
Great cunting RJ, with a great addendum CC!
The only thing that amazes me about these two gurning fuckwits is how they’ve managed to go so far, and make so much dosh, with so little to offer.
Can this really be only their third cunting?
13
“So little to offer” is greatly bigging them up. Frankly, they’ve got f-all to offer! Guaranteed that anything with them in it (no matter how long or short their appearance) is going to be s*hite. They make other dismal tv duos (think Mike & Bernie Winters, Cannon & Ball etc) look like television comedy Gôds.
13
I will say this for them – though they seem very good friends, at least there isn’t the fucking camp limp-wristed behaviour with this pair. Like most ITV “stars” they are over-used but if I were forced to watch ITV I would rather see them than Phillip Schofield and Alan Carr. Saw a trail for a Carr-camp show last night just before the Dog Show on ITV (Paul O’Grady, yet another effeminate shirtlifter as well), at least Ant & Dec behave more like men. They do produce exceedling crap shows though.
13
Whey aye the’ divvint camp it up. obviously thor are nar na geordie pooftahs, anny real men that drink fifteen pints an’ smerk 40 tabs befawa breakfast. awa wi’ yee.
4
https://youtu.be/7zEoKBLO1VM
This shows the limit of their talents, although this was with three tanentless cunts especially that fucking Rylan wearing Shergars teeth.
0
They were actors in a kids TV show, they were kids TV presenters and then they somehow became prime time Stars. How the fuck the deformed dw4rf cunts managed this no one knows.
The great British public will adore anyone they are told is a national treasure even when it’s obvious they ain’t gold but glitter covered dog shit.
14
Apparently they got £40 million for their next deal.
Laughing all the way to the off licence, driving then crashing then totally forgotten about and back to normal. Old normal not new fucking normal.
40 million to do what exactly.
Yes I’m a jealous cunt.
Need my pills again. Nurrrrrrrrse!!!!!!
11
It would be lovely if they were made into sausages that were sold to Syrians.
Cunts.
17
Ant n Dec Juicy Bangers – from Walls of course!
4
Because they’re still relatively young and healthy I would harvest their body parts, and give them to normal people awaiting transplants.
When there was nothing left to us, I would throw them in a skip with the other rubbish.
Whichever one of the cunts got caught drink driving they should have surgically removed his eyes, to stop him doing it again.
4
To use, fucking predictive text.
0
People in the know tell me they have talent. Im fucked if I can see it. I distantly remember these two from Byker Wall days…running from Shields Road (Byker) to the dene at throckley some 6 miles away Fucked if I know how they did that?…..Perhaps they DO have talent
6
Robin Hood (Kevin Costner) got from the White Cliffs of Dover up to Hadrian’s Wall and still made it home to Nottingham all in one day…no mean feat.
Evening ASA.
7
Good evening Dick. Nice of you to call….I remember that clip, , another miracle of the magic of the screen no less. Do you recall that other laughingly funny bit in Get Carter ? Jarrow Slakes to fucking Seaham, running all the way with a 410 that turned into 12 . And he wasnt even out of breath ! ( Btw Coviid stopped the move…still down south, and I think the sale may fall through )
2
That auld trout “Vera” is another who seems to have the ability to teleport… Elsdon Gibbet to South Shields in the blink of an eye.
Sorry to hear your move may not go ahead….the property market could well be a different beast when all this current shite gets settled down.
4
Here is a conundrum, these cunts have won more TV awards than I have had hot dinners, they are in the fucking Guinness World Records for awards, how can this be same great british public who told Magic Grandpa to Fuck Off.
Unbelievable!
10
The election may have had a very different result if it had been a phone-in.
5
Telly…It’s all shit, all of it. Just look at the gormless morons in the Ant and Dec audience, drooling over the celebrity wankfest. I can’t watch anything modern anymore as it just makes me angry. All I need nowadays is the occasional..
Auf Wiedersehen Pet
Minder
Sweeney
Any old shit on Talking Pictures
Bullseye
The rest of TV can fuck off.
18
I think theyre canny like.
Howay!!
3
I think the blame here lies with the moronic braindead shitheads in this country that have made this pair of gurning talentless cunts for some inexplicable reason so fucking popular.
19
Prime example of catering to the lowest common denominator. Which sadly is the majority in this once great nation.
They make the Krankies with the shirtlifter magician (Piff Paff Puff, don’t need an Enigma machine to work that code out) look relevant.
The modern equivalent of Duncan Norvell “oh r@pe me!!”.
6
Geoffrey Durham isn’t gay, and never has been.
1
Then I wholeheartedly apologies.
1
Cunt was married to Victoria Wood so probably not bent but definitely a fucking questionable taste in birds.
6
I am already serving my penance. I will spend the next two hours reading the Daily Mail online. Fuck me their reporting consists of:-
Xs hilarious twatter post.
Ys eye popping bikin shoot.
Zs abs down to revolutionary new diet pill.
Stella time I think.
5
They are celebrated as the best in entertainment because we are in the dire situation of having nothing else to compare than with.
The entertainment industry plays to the lowest denominator . These Tefal headed cunts are a sad reflection of what society have become and the reason that ISAC came into being.
19
Have scientists discovered which one is which yet?
6
The one with the big forehead is either Ant or Dec. Hope that helps
15
And the one who’s a cunt is… oh hang on
4
His forehead is so big that you can see the back of his neck.
2
Entertainment?. I’d like to see the cunts fight to the death in the Colloseum. Fuck football and Saturday bollox. I want proper bread, blood and circuses. All overseen by is a cunt. Thumbs up, thumbs down
9
Fucking hate these two cunts – don’t really know what else to say!
4
‘Simply not funny anymore’…. You were assuming they were funny in the first place?
9
Fair comment rev best I can recall is mild amusement during early days of IACGMOOH when I say mild I mean closer to tooth extraction than laugh out load.
3
They are LCD (lowest common denominator) “entertainment” for the masses on Saturday night ITV. Never a haven of quality in its 65 years of existence.
They are not remotely in the same league as Morecambe and Wise or even Cannon and Ball or Little and Large (RIP) (nor even Hale and Pace). Two cheeky chappies from up north they may be but that’s where the comparison ends.
Order a takeaway from Just Eat, pour it into a trough and let’s all have a bloody good nosh and larf!!! How to keep the underclass happy. Nothing too taxing on the old bonce. The kids like them because they are simple(tons).
It’s all too much for poor old Ant though, always having breakdowns. Dec is content with improving his swing on the golf course, the second home for all second rate celebs.
Bring back Brucie’s Big Night.
2
Sorry Baron Von, you already made the LCD comment which I repeated.
Bloody true though.
3
Not to worry Sir. Reiterated the point nicely. Like the use of LCD though. Most useful in these frustrating times. I do believe they are plasma grade cunts though.
4
Never watched or listened to them and never will, and I’m from their neck of the woods. To me they are just dipshit fodder, watched only by vacuous motherfuckers.
I’d rather watch the Krankies then these cunts.
11
You can trace the comedy double act right the way back to Laurel and Hardy and beyond through the Victorian Music Hall.
They follow a standard formula……two blokes taking the piss out of each other. It’s only the context of the piss taking that changes. It’s only a matter of time before some cunt comes up with a gay double act for the sophisticated, metropolitan woke audience. Then you’ll be begging for Ant and Dec.
5
Now you’re talking. Laurel & Hardy still make me laugh. They shared a bed but never a question of any bumdery. Me misses bought me that new film about them but I can’t watch anything with Steve ‘champagne socialist Coogan anymore. Wanker.
6
Agree totally Cunta.
Laurel & Hardy I found funny at age 8yr, and at 50yrs still find them funny.
Thats why my goldfish that Doreen Lawrence murdered was called Laughing Gravy after the L&H film.
Im boycotting Steve Coogan and even though I have a copy of the film i will never watch it.
That’ll show him.
3
Everytime I go into santander I complain about these two twats and how much loot they are paid, I have never brought a product endorsed by a celeb ever ditch the ego maniacs and pay me more interest on my cash you wankers.
9
I always hear their names in a seth Efrican Accent in my head…
4
There must be something about the North East that fosters fucking big foreheads – this pair of twats, Dominic Cümmings – all monumental slapheads. I wonder if our own Sir Fiddler has a similar affliction beneath that dapper hat ?
6
I’m from the North East and I don’t have a big forehead, but incidentally, I do have a monster cock…
5
Im from the North west and have the same affliction 3D!
Like a gorillas arm clutching a melon.
☺
2
Fucking hell, that is one visual description that is now indellibly etched into my brain… 😉
3
“…but without the irony, relevance or entertainment value…”
that’s nit picking innit?
3
Yes a surgical dissection of the system that spawns as much as the spawn, so precise in fact I had to run for the thesaurus
0
Best thing to do with these two untalented Geordie Hobbits is vote with your remote And Switch Them Off 😀😀😆😀
5
Cunts of no value whatever; and I’ve no idea which one is which. Nor do I care.
Cunts.
2