The Shite Girls
In the words of Maggie Thatcher, ‘rejoice, rejoice!’. Yes, after an absence of some twenty years, The Spice Girls are reforming and going on tour in the UK.
Naturally the announcement has been accompanied by a massive publicity blitz and media circus, during which the pop poppets have been making weighty pronouncements of their new artistic philosophy to a panting world. Emma Bunton says that ‘girl power’ is now out; ‘it’s now people power, we’re about equality and bringing people together’. An’ stuff. Oh, and about MAKING LOADSA MONEY. It’s expected that Spice Communiques will be issued on a regular basis, offering the girls’ views on subjects such as climate change, the environment and world poverty, but perhaps not about how they’re MAKING LOADSA MONEY.
This wonderful news has been tinged with sadness and tragedy. ‘Thicky’ Adams, the artiste formerly known as ‘Posh’, will not be taking part in the reunion, it being universally acknowledged that her enormous vocal ability will be greatly missed. Posh has confirmed that she’ll be concentrating her talents on her ‘nerve-wracking and all-consuming’ fashion career, pursuing her devotion to ’empowering women through fashion’. Oh, and to MAKING LOADSA MONEY.
Any chance that you could do us a favour and considerably extend the tour girls? Take your cynical, vacuous, shallow selves, and the manufactured plastic pap you’ve got the nerve to call music, and fuck off to desirable destinations such as the Yemen, Syria, North Korea and Afghanistan. With any luck, you’ll be taken hostage for a very, very long time. Now THAT’S what I want, what I really, really want…
Nominated by Ron Knee
Mel B appears to be inviting a cunting. The cunt has earned millions from fuckwits buying her shit music, and the cunt wastes millions. What a cunt, how the fuck can you spend all that fucking cash, over 30 million, and have fuck all. Now she’s crawled back to the other relics to go on tour to pull in a few more millions to spend on fucking soul glow. Not only that but she’s touring bookshops with her book – A thousand and one ways to be a cunt. I’m sorry, I’m not flowing well tonight, but you get the idea…………..if any of the more experienced cunters would wish to put into words just what a monumental cunt of a cunt this woman is, please feel free
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And let’s not forget she made sure Eddie Murphy jjizzed in it at the right time to lock in the monthly maintenance fee!
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Pop tarts. Elderly pop tarts with their tits hanging down like a slatelayers nailbags.
Bollocks to them, especially the spendthrift tart.
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mel b is a perverted creature whose underwear hygiene is more than somewhat suspect. friggin minger.
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No such place as Birth Korea. It is the DPRK. The term “north”Korea is an imperialist term used by the despotic west in a vain attempt to keep the people’s of the one Korean nation separated. Seriously cunters,I am all for counting the spice girls but that is no excuse to launch western hatred against chairman Kim.
I am disappointed.
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My phone auto spell is also a MASSIVE cunt.
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Android, huh?
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This ragtag troupe of skanks are undoubtedly exploiting their ‘Girl Power heyday but its the paying public who provide the opportunity for them to once again squeeze their now sagging tits and cellulite ridden arses into skin tight clothing and launch a full on assault of the ears.
Maybe they are ‘keeping it real’ for the fans, identifying with the Primark army of Vicky Pollards of this world, tales of divorce, multiple kids from flaky baby daddies, domestic abuse and bankruptcy.
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Don’t forget revenge porn, STDs, vaginoplasty, and spiritualicity.
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If Posh’s vocal range is sorely missed, they could always lie her down and use her chest as a xylophone?
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……or use her fanny as a recording studio.
No, Posh doesn’t need the money as she’s married to a cunt rich enough to pay Mavis’s EU divorce bill .
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If my memory serves correctly, this tuneless bunch of trollops had a comeback before.
They let the public decide, and their gig would be in whatever city that polled the most votes.
The outcome was Baghdad, but they lied through their teeth and said it was Toronto anyhow.
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I don’t know when tickets will go on sale but you can bet your bottom dollar an agency like TicketWanker will buy them all up and flog them at some inflated fucking price. And those lucky cunts that do manage to sell their kids to buy a couple will no doubt put them on ebay for double or even treble that, and thick desperate cunts will still cough up!
I hope that blonde bint doesn’t wear that union flag skirt thing again; I really don’t wanna see her well used skank hole; and pity the poor cunts near the front of the stage catching a whiff of not only that crusty spunk filled hole, but that of the other three spunk buckets, all of them will no doubt will be silently farting during their dance routines.
I’ll give it 2 months into the tour before they chuck it all in and fuck off- just like they did last time.
Cunt Power!
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Any Cunt looking to buy a ticket deserves to be ripped off paying TicketWanker’s inflated prices. Even a free complimentary ticket, (including backstage pass) would not be worth missing an evening home with the family surfing Pornhub.
Fuck off and die, you narcissistic money grubbing CUNTS!
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Emma Bunton, though bland has never actually displayed any overt cuntiness. Same with that scouse one, Mel C. Even Geri Halliwell or whatever she’s called now has been relatively quiet of late.
Obviously they’re still all cunts though for this sad, pathetic and irrelevant reunion.
The real cunt here is Mel B. What a true piece of shit she is. I feel damned sorry for her poor children.
Did any cunter see her on “Big fat quiz of the year in 2014? Vile, aggressive, no sense of humour whatsoever:
https://youtu.be/VS2CIVWj7U0
I hope she dies very soon.
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Naughty, naughty, Tom!
By carefully and systematically picking out the only non-white bint in the group, you have proved yourself to be a racist, bigoted xenophobic misogynistic old pevert.
You will have to be strung up by the larger of your two testicles and forced to apologise on Twatter for your errant behavior!
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Ho ho, yes…good point. Very well then, I’ve just noticed Emma Bunton in the top picture doing that stupid fucking “peace” symbol thing, so she’s a worthless cunt too!
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Say no more :
https://www.bbc.com/news/newsbeat-45328180
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Cauterwailing bunch of talent-free arseholes the first time around. Why any cunt would want to reminisce over their 1990’s screeching and their film buddy Gary Glitter, is anycunt’s guess.
My Jack Russell has more vocal talent than Victoria Beckham. Silly old fucking troutcunt.
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It’s probably more attractive too….
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Trust me DTS, my Daisy is far better looking. I bet her breath is sweeter too, even after a feast of Pedigree Chum.
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Their first gig should be on North Sentinel Island…
I’m glad they’re dropping the whole “girl power” shite.
Feminism is cancer….
I’d still get up to my nuts in Emma Bunton though!
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It seems to be an ever increasingly attractive option to send cunts to North Sentinel. There is hopefully some beads and fire water deal in the offing.
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I doubt there’s a boat big enough to take all the cunts that I want to send
….and they’d need a shit load of arrows and spears. Maybe we could use some of the foreign aid budget!
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Bum fucking tory MP Nick Boles , is on the Sophie Ridge show spouting a load of bollocks about immigration and freedom of movement. Apparently he thinks people are coming to realise that it’s not much of a problem.
Maybe not where he lives, perhaps he should get out more.
Also, this cunt claimed over 600 quid on expenses so that he could take Hebrew language lessons. Perhaps he wants to talk dirty to his Israeli bum boy civil partner in Yiddish ?
All the while advocating cuts for others.
Oy vey ?
Fuck off.
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Agreed Jack, if the cunt is an advocate of freedom of movement, I’ll freely move all the immigrants from around me into his back yard.
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Boles, Mangledbum, Streeting, Bradshaw, Duncan, Greening…. what do they all have in common?.
On Radio 4 yesterday morning they had a real shitfest in 28 minutes: Soubry, Mandelson and Blair – in a (of course) non-partial talk about Brexit on the Westminster programme. Strangely compared to that stupid rancid cow Soubry overacting as ever, Mandy sounded almost sane.
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Don’t worry, Delia Smith is on the Super Injunction Marr show this morning to tell us how leaving the EU feels “so wrong” to her.
No doubt this vicar’s wife, who lives in private lands in the backwoods of Norfolk, has not been blessed with the benefits of “cultural enrichment” like those misguided working class souls, crammed into cities that now resemble a foreign land.
So there you have it. Delia thinks that the rest of us should put up with being transformed into Islamabad or Mogadishu so that her books can flow freely into the EU unhindered.
No doubt all of those multiple Michelin starred chefs in France, Italy and Spain rely heavily on her culinary tomes.
Where else could they get those tasteless stodge recipes for crap that went out of fashion shortly after rationing ended??
Stick to the spotted dick luv and leave the politics to the grown-ups.
Or even better, how about leaving your privileged, snow-white bubble and try spending 6 months in the middle floor of a three storey tenement in Luton with a family of 8 “parkings” below and a gang of 30yr old male Eritrean children above, and let’s see how your tune changes.
Cunt!
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Delia Smith boils my piss.
That recipe is on p. 294 of her Classic Cookbook, p. 13 of her 2000 Christmas Cookbook, p. 666 of Oh Shite, I’m running out of new ideas Cookbook….
She had one good idea to get The Canaries to run faster…
Prunes and a mug of espresso.
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Fuck me sideways !
Gina Miller’s on now, saying she wants to help people understand what thick cunts they were for voting leave.
I’m taking the dog for a walk before I do meself a mischief.
We’re awash with cunts.
Sky can fuck off too.
Gaaaaaah !
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And Gove is on Marr now.
Jesus! You can see the slime dripping off the cunt!
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I worry that Gove might be related to Tusk, somehow, in a fifth-dimension of utter wankitude. Bizarre rectangle-headed goblins.
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And there’s going to be another 9 days of this full on Remoaner hysteria before the Government narrowly loses the vote. Then it all starts up again…
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At least top God guy stuck to the messGe he is paid to deliver and didnt go into the politics , respect to the cunt!
I watched Delia Smith and she looked like she was on some kind of medication, silly fucking cow stick to cooking and supporting the inbreds in Norwich.
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Spice girls tickets ALL sold out within minutes chaps from £70 to ( for vip ) £970
There’s lots of daft cunts about !!!!!
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As an artist it is your responsibility to know when to keep your dignity and kinda just fuck off.
That moment was the minute they believed they had any sort of talent.
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American boxing judges, the great Fury got robbed last night despite handing out a boxing lesson.
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Yeah but he did end up on his arse a couple of times.
It was on PPV at stupid o’clock in the morning so I’ll wait for the freebie to come out, watch it, and make my decision then.
All 3 judges saw it as pretty close by all accounts.
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I stayed up to hear it on the radio. They panicked when they realized Fury had won, so they gave the score cards back to the judges for a rethink.
There are so many iffy decisions by judges these days, they either have to be corrupt or incompetent. It’s an embarrassment, especially when it happens here in the UK. You expect it from foreigners.
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Afternoon all
It’s gratifying to know that my fellow cunters share my distaste for this bunch of shallow, money-grubbing tarts.
‘People power’ my arse.
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Surely all their fans are now adults and realise what a shitfest the whole thing was.
Disappointing ticket sales without doubt.
The black bird gives the impression she could start a fight in an empty room….
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I think I read somewhere that extra dates are being arranged to meet demand. To quote Lincoln, ‘you can fool some of the people all of the time’.
It was indeed a gravy train shitfest of the most cynical and manufactured kind. The likes of Cowell must eat their hearts out.
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Well, Geri left originally because she couldn’t stand the coked up uppity Mills & Boon gobshite for another second… I think Mel B is much like Cheryl Whatever her name is these days… A school bully and the town slag made it big… Only all the fame. money, and blokes in the world can’t hide the smell of scum…
Always found Ms. Halliwell rather talented… Can’t fucking sing or dance, but very talented…
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Ginger spice’s talent was those massive knockers that sold so many records to gullible young boys with a hard on and a shite taste in music
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Well I think this reunion is totally waycist because in this day and age shouldn’t they be called the “Masala Girls” to keep “peacefuls” happy?
If Skeletor Spice is doing a no-show then maybe they should recruit the AL-BEEB’s very own St. Nadia of Bake-Off to complete the spice rack?
FGM power and all that…
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Yes rebel.
It’s not just the religion of peace, it’s also the religion of women’s rights.
… as long as they shut up, do as they’re told, allow themselves to be gang raped by the sweaty, smelly cunt workers at the kebab shop and wear a bag over their heads every time they leave the house.
….so enriching.
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Fucking platinum isn’t it!
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I wish Mrs. Boggs would wear a bag over her head each time she left the house then perhaps she wouldn’t show me up so much. I wonder if that little shit Keir Starmer is looking for a mistress?. If he got one of her legs across him he wouldn’t get up in a hurry.
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Mavis May was quite keen on Sharia, and I really feel that a bag over her head would be a 1000% improvement.
(Figures provided by The Totally Reliable Department Of Government Statistics)
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Girl power? They’re in their mid forties, ffs!
Time to admit that their next gig should be the Womens’ Institute calendar…
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Lol a few cunts on here would buy it
Me too…
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I don’t say it wouldn’t be a vast improvement. As long as they shut their mouths.
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Spice Girls, the menopause album…
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What do you call 4 dogs and a blackbird?
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The Spice Girls. You cunt.
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I confess as a febrile teen i may have stroked my sausage over Geri in her bap-enhancing Union Jack dresss, and Melanie B’s impressive decolletage and northern sass.
Also, this was just before mass adoption of the internet.
Personally, i think they should let it go rather than keep having these ‘re-unions’. Who’s the audience for it? Tubby 30- something blondes in admin with BPD and 3 cats.
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‘Yo, I’ll tell you what I want, what I really, really want……
MORE FUCKING MONEY, GREEDY CUNTS.
These twats are the human equivalent of herpes. You just cannot get rid of them. How devastated they must all be that Posh isn’t joining them because she is busy hemming Fatty John’s sequin leotard. Music aficionados will doubtless be slitting their wrists and drinking bleach as we speak.
I sympathise deeply. I was almost considering the same when I heard they were reforming again.
DESPERATE CUNTS.
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Posh spice isn’t joining them because shes fucking loaded with her rich hubbys money bend it like cuntham, why sing and dance when you got a full bank? She wasn’t much use to the group anyway she had minimumal singing parts she just had that posh stuck up cunt look on her face while the others pranced around her
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If the spice girls reunion tickets selling out are any indications its that people would literally buy dogshit and shame on humanity for this insipid export of a shite pop group. That horrible girl power muzak filled my memories of the late 90’s with dread simon cowell is laughing all the way to the bank the phony cunt
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