are cunts.
Inflatable dolls are typically marketed as low-cost party novelties rather than functional products.
These items are defined by their disposable nature and frequently fail to meet basic consumer expectations regarding durability and appearance.
Here are some common defects and issues which I have personally encountered …
Structural Failures: “Dead on Arrival” products that leak air immediately due to pinholes or failed heat-seals.
Weak Seams: Because the vinyl is thin, the seams often split under the slightest pressure, making the doll impossible to keep inflated.
Misleading Proportions: While advertised as “life-sized,” many cheap models are significantly smaller (often only 4–5 feet tall) and have distorted, cartoonish features.
Strong Chemical Odours: Budget dolls are often made from low-grade PVC that emits a strong, unpleasant plastic smell (off-gassing) that can persist for days.
They typically use very thin vinyl (under 0.2mm), which is easily punctured and loses its shape quickly.
Basic Valves: Most use “pinch valves” (like cheap beach balls) that are prone to popping open or leaking air slowly over a few hours.
Mass Production: Lack of quality control means a high percentage of units leave the factory with manufacturing defects.
I am sick of buying bicycle repair kits.
Waste of fucking money.
I`m off to have a wank.
Nominated by sņigger-sņigger.
Arguably the last great Only Fools and Horses episode (before Cassandra and the horrendous Raquel ruined it).
A farting sound is heard in the flat. The brothers both look at a disgruntled Uncle Albert. Rodney traces the sound to the mini bar. Two life size blow up dolls pop up, and the Trotters shit themselves and run out of the flat.
Also, at the end, the same two dolls explode. Del says to some watching tramps ‘Told ’em not to have the mutton vindaloo’.🤣
19
On the subject of blow up dolls and the laughing stock British politics has become…
Wonder what happened to Gina Miller?
You remember, that horrendous slag? Old Banana Gob?
She had six foot. Seven foot. Eight foot knob.
Daylight come an’ me wanna go home.🎵
13
All this bitchiness and bad feelings between weaze Streeting and Kier Starmer..
cant they just share a rentboy or something?
they need to get along.
afterall theyre in the same business,
destroying the UK.
Rather than scratching each others eyes out geta inflatable Burt Reynolds, bottle of poppers, tub of vasaline and stretch each others balloonknot.
stick a kylie cd on.
13
one of my favouite films is Smokey an the Bandit, im quite highbrow when it comes to films.
That Burt Reynolds says
that “hes got a smoky on his tail”.
the filthy fucker.
Hate dirty stuff like that in whats meant to be family viewing.
he should be ashamed.
Anyway the star is Jackie Gleeson.
hehehe, he calls his son a ‘tickturd’
and said hes gonna punch his mama in the belly.
brilliant.
8
Sally Field in Smokey and the Bandit.
The words bang, shithouse door and force nine gale spring to mind.
6
They’re both so wet and indecisive that neither of them could decide who bums who first.
7
Oh I don’t think there’s much doubt that Lesley will be playing the lady’s role Thomas.
I see Olukemi got Les so hot and bothered in Parliament today that she smudged her make up. Started mouthing off across the despatch box at the n1gn0g.
Not very stateswoman-like.
Hardly leadership material.
Must be Lesley’s time of the month.
4
Blow up dolls?
Fuck that.
8
Smith and Jones did a film back in the late eighties ‘Wilt’ the star of the show was one of these.
Happy more innocent times.
6
I banged the arse on one of them a few years ago. Had to buy a replacement…
4
Buying expensive romantic dolls.
more money than sense.
Look around the back of department stores,
many have a skip where if your lucky in love youll find a mannequin.
your just a drill hole away from losing your virginity.👍
or maybe your one of those jammy fuckers works in a morgue?
fill yer boots💪
5
that made it look like it was for you mr Grasshopper!!😅
sorry
wasnt.
3
Thanks for the tip Mis. Just heading over to the bins at M&S now…
3
Inflatable doll.
Lover ungrateful.
I blew up your body…
But you blew my mind!
(Roxy Music 1973)
8
Yes, it just seems so improbable that Bryan Ferry would produce an ode to a blow up vinyl sex doll.
3
Genius.
🔴
4
Heard Bernie Clifton could only have sex with his wife if wearing his ostrich in bed.
same with Roger deCoursey.
only way he could get Nooky is with his hand up a bear.
funny human sexuality innit?
some peoples peccadilloes are repellant to others.
i couldnt shag a rubber doll.
id get self conscious.
ridiculous.
7
I heard Ray Allan was bummed regularly by Lord Charles.
After downing a gottle of geer and a slice of gread and gutter, Lord Charles would enter Ray Allan’s ‘silly ass’ and proceed to pleasure him with long a forceful strokes of his bakelite puppet chode.
8
Well, Miserable.
Keith Harris actually got married with that Orville thing on his arm, Straight up, that fucking irritating duck thing was on the wedding photos. All over the papers at the time.
Dread to think what the wedding night was like. Did the Mrs Harris hear the squeaky voice of Orville going ‘Yes! Yes! Ohhh fuck! Yes!’?🤣
9
its a known fact that Keith and Orville were siamese twins.
joined at the wrist to arse.
think they lived near Sellafield nuclear plant.
i hate that duck.
L.Henry
4
some people stick hamsters up their hoop.
some like those vibrating balls buzzing away in their lower tripes.
some get off on wearing little knickers an dancing in the mirror.
These people are all Labour voters.
13
The thing with these inflatable dolls is that they don’t get the rectum right at all. You can just tell it isn’t the same as normal bumming. Last one I had, fucking prolapsed Wes Streeting inflatable dinghy. Absolute shite. Mind you, I was fisting it. Got me arm stuck because of the vacuum effect and had to ask the missues to cut it off with scissors. Luckily, she didn’t have her glasses on so I just said it was the lilo from last year’s holiday.
9
I overheard this conversation recently:
“I hate them cheap male inflatable dolls.
Their willies aren’t hard enough to penetrate my hoop.”
2
Fuck inflatable dolls….!
GB, what a fucking basket case.
The alternative to Starmer is:
Streeting.
Milliband.
Rayner.
I’d vote for the inflatable fucking doll..!
Jesus H Christ..
9
More intellectual gravitas in the inflatable doll than that lot.
2
I figured out that one of these high quality TPE dolls would have been far cheaper in the long run than marrying Mrs Pillar:
https://leeloodolls.co.uk
Imagine living alone, Sky+HD, big telly, boiler blaring, a couple of beers and nobbing that when you fancy. Luxury! Instead of that I chose a wife and kids bleeding me dry.
The only problem is it couldn’t make my dinner:
Then when you get old you have the inconvenience of getting rid of it before you die! Imagine a relative finding it in your house after you’ve gone. How embarrassing.
2