Oh gawd….the country’s oldest bachelor boy has reappeared to let us know that he is still alive but more importantly that he was diagnosed with prostate cancer and is now on the mend.
He urged men to “get tested, get checked”. Maybe all that sun in the Caribbean has fried his brain. Has he tried to see a GP or a specialist and then wait months for treatment? This wizened old ballbag almost certainly has private healthcare and is not at the mercy of Our NHS which is in the middle of its annual winter permacrisis and doctors strikes.
Maybe he’d like Tracy from the canteen to give him an examination in the medical supplies cupboard because they are short-staffed and have no wards available or some Africunt with a with a qualification from a backstreet diploma factory who thinks his prostate is in his ear? Its especially galling as he is now using the very same media that he lamented for press intrusion into his private life to whine about his ills. Its almost as if he has a nationwide tour to promote and a calendar to sell.
To add insult to injury Cliff also wants to work with King Charles to raise awareness on cancer….well chimp lad can fuck off as well. He is another rarefied old throbber who needs a dose of the real world.
‘We don’t talk anymore’ the care home favourite once sang. Christ, if only.
Nominated by : Liberal Liquidator
Does this mean that he won’t be going on a Bummer Holiday?
9
I am as suspicious of Mtr.Richard’s prostate cancer as I was – and remain – of Wes Streeing’s kidney cancer.
Both are a pair of hypochondriac old poofters and in Wessy’s case he was offered and accepted the job of health secretary on his sickbed.
Let’s be honest if you are unfortunate enough to be diagnosed with this appalling illness the future seems very uncertain.
My guess is that both used the “C” word to draw attention away from the fact that The Daily Star caught them going into a clap clinic.
5
The cunt is 85 years old.
I would have been surprised if he didn’t have some sort of cancer, but he probably thinks that he will live forever.
People get old and die.
They will probably die of something horrible.
Few people have their adoring family gathered around their bed in a candlelit room, gently sobbing while the wise, last words are uttered before slowly slipping away.
Get real Cliff, and understand that the NHS doesn’t even bother treating terminal conditions for the very old.
Silly, wrinkly old cunt.
9
Thank you, Artful, you’ve cheered me up no end.
5
I little while back, in recent memory, everyone was allegedly all dying of the same thing. So if they had heart disease, got run over by a bus, jumped off the cliff at Beach Head or stuck their face in a fan, & no one died of flu, or for that matter prostate cancer.
2
This vicious unwarranted attack
On a National treasure like Cliff made me sick to my tripes.
You should be ashamed LL.
I listened to mr Richards shrewd health advice and took the plunge.
I knocked at Cliffs mansion and within minutes was sans my undercrackers bent over his desk with his fingers exploring my balloon knot.
Luckily im all clear.
But Mr Richards has asked for his wrist watch back as it was a present from his mother.
10
Come on Cliff, throw a seven for uncle Cunty. Thanks.
4
Two years ago being a certain age and the adverts on the idiot lantern, went to the doctor’s and asked for a PSA test.
Her reply was, why do you want that ? 🤔
She said it was not a conclusive test for prostate cancer as the levels of PSA rise and fall. Fair enough thought I. She also said the only way for sure was a scan of the area involved..
Which if they screened the population using this system would take forever and cost a fortune.
Anyway, I did have the blood test, but came away thinking what is all the advertising about when they know it’s of very little use..!
8
I’ve learned from bitter experience over the years that the prostate’s a complete cunt when it decides to act up.
I pity any bloke going through a similar experience, esp if it turns out to be cancer.
4
His annual calendar always sells well throughout every nursing home in the land.
Perhaps the December page can feature a picture of his arsehole.
By Royal Appointment of Sultan Charles of the Balmoral Caliphate.
What a bunch of cunts.
Good morning.
6
“Therefore, rejoice, O heavens and you who dwell in them ! But woe to you, O earth and sea, for the devil has come down to you in great wrath, because he knows that his time is short!”
(Revelation 12:12)
😈
2
Is that the Pulp Fiction book of verse?
2
Nah, it’s off Iron Maiden’s “Number of the Beast”, MCC.
4
Doctor Barrymore has offered to give him a full depth closed-fist proctology exam.
Whilst Christopher Biggins holds Cliff’s head under the water.
5
I’m 4years younger and thinking about it.
3
So brave. Just like our royals. The woman royal (sorry, cant tell one from another) was able to go to a banquet just 10 months after treatment.
Bravery.
5
I should imagine, CC, that when he throws a seven ( please, let it be soon ) that he’ll be given a state funeral complete with a National day of mourning and a 21 gun salute, such is his bravery.
It almost trancends that of the Royal leeches, sorry I meant family.
0
Cliff, brilliant. He’s still so groovy. When will he tie the knot with sexy Sue Barker? A question for the ages.
Well done, Sir!
6
I think he did something with the knot of a retired vicar. Perhaps the more erudite cunters could enlighten us?
3
Shrivelled old colostomy bag.
Fuck him.
4
I shouldn’t think he would get many offers
2
Mandelson would be in there like a rat up a drainpipe!
He’s gay, you know.
Not a lot of people know that.
So couldn’t possibly have been up to any funny business on Epstein Island…
5
A prune is a dried plum.
🪠
2
Does it affect your prostate if you don’t release spunk every now and again?? In Cliff’s case his last jizz bolt was in 1976 so the pressure on his gonads must be immense. Akin to the water pressure presently bearing down on the Titanic.
5
Apparently the regular and frequent release of man-yoghurt reduces the risk of prostate cancer. Cliff is fine – a lifetime of emptying the creamy contents of his saggy old nuts into young boy fan’s arseholes would have held him in good stead.
“Beware the devil Cliffy, He’s gonna get you from behind…”
5
Full cremation treatment for the old fart
3
Hmmm. Dubious timing.
Much like when the Royals were suffering scandal after scandal (when are they not to be fair) and suddenly the King and lo and behold the fruity Kate both had cancer at the same time
Both recovered seemingly without too much bother.
3
Anyone for tennis?
3
O/T:
(Inspired by a news story today). You are walking on your favourite beach and you come across the severed heads of five government ministers. Who would you like them to be. My picks are:
Kweer himself
Miliband
Reeves
Streeting, with his piggy little eyes
and Symonds-Thomas, the little creep crawling up the EU arsehole
https://www.express.co.uk/news/world/2156485/5-human-heads-displayed-beach
4
Even though he’s no longer an M.P: Suqdiq Khan. I’d take his head to a barbequeue and film him eating saussies and bacon and, doing my best pakı ventriloquist voice, make him denounce Allah and his pædo prophet and say that, before he died, he saw the light and apostasised towards Judaism, then post the footage on Youtube and await the fireworks.
5
Very classy Thomas especially the converting bit!
3
What a load of bollocks, no one gave a flying fuck last time I crashed a bike, no one wrote stories about my prostrate. Didn’t he supposedly shag that tennis player 300 years ago is it that Cliff Richard? Sometime just being pissed is a rare blessing.
2
Good look Cliff, don’t listen to the jealous twisted individuals on here.
I went to see Summer Holiday at the cinema when it came out.
1
Nadhim zahawi
” ive been a Conservative all my life,
And will die a conservative.”
Just joined Reform UK.😅
Theif from Baghdad.
2
I’m fairly sure that I read in Hello! magazine (though I could be wrong, it might have been on Loose Women) that Cliff is much happier if the doctor keeps a hand on each shoulder during the exam. ✋🏻🖕🏻🤚🏻
1