I am a huge fan of the humble Brussels sprout. It is fitting that the most well known Belgian is a vegetable.
Mrs Twenty knows how to prepare the perfect sprout to accompany Christmas dinner, still firm and very slightly crisp. Nothing finer, the absolute king of greens. However, I have been to more than a few festive repasts where the hostesses have seen fit to embellish the noble sprout with a honey glaze, mix them with chestnuts, or even individually wrap them in bacon. Who fucking does that?
I can sort of understand Americans messing up their veg, we expect nothing else. Martha Stewart probably started this shit when she had nothing better to do in clink. But now everyone is at it, even the cunt with the huge tongue.
Please, please, can we have a return to sanity and restore the simple sprout its dignity?
Seasons Greetings.
Nominated by : Twenty Thousand Cunts Under the Sea
I love my sprouts boiled, but still with a bite to them, with a generous slice of butter on top😋 I noticed all the supermarkets were doing Christmas dinner in a box this year and everyone of them had ruined the vegetables with this honey glazed crap. I won’t even touch honey glazed ham etc🤮
8
I feel your pain twenty. These pretentious wankers forget that it fucks the sprouts up and make them unusable for for the main event, bubble and squeak with cold Turkey with a fried egg on top.
In other news I did not wet the babies head yesterday.
5
If sprouts were any good we would eat them all year round, not just at Christmas.
The same goes for most of the seasonal crap.
Turkey, dates, tangerines and Christmas pud.
All shite and eaten because everyone else does.
Happy Boxing Day everyone!
7
Brussels Sprouts – the only vegetable ever to inspire an Oscar winning film – Gone Wit The Wind.
7
Sprouts are vital if you wish to produce a wonderful Yuletide log on Boxing Day.
7
I stir-fry sprout, chopped into halves or thirds, in butter and black pepper with the smokiest bacon I can find.
I call it sprout surprise, because even people who say they don’t like sprouts are surprised to find they like them.
Also, I can assure you that this way of cooking in no way detracts from them making a brilliant bubble’n’squeak.
Now, please excuse me as breakfast is beckoning.
7
Couple of years back on Christmas day,
Missus Miserable an her mum plating up the Christmas dinners,
And my plate, had about 30 Brussels sprouts on it!!
I politely asked if shed gone fuckin mental and she said accusingly
“you said you like them!”
Like im a liar.
I explained that yes indeed i do like them but not in the quantity youd give a elephant and could she go back and scrape most of them off.
Fuck sake.
8
Thirty spouts is a bit excessive Mis, she couldn’t blame you for the epic farting session later on then.
Is it watching classic Columbo in your underpants for Boxing Day?
5
Brussels sprouts, the essential ingredient for the traditional family festive blowing off contest.
This Christmas the dog won chez Twatt.
Not for the first time.
4
Indeed Geordie.
The original fart in a colander.
Morning all.
0
We have our Christmas meal on Christmas Eve here and I always cook it.
Every bar and restaurant in Spanish areas is shut by 6pm at the latest, so there is nothing to do except stay at home and eat.
It’s the only time of year that I allow myself to eat potatoes and I fucking suffered for that, not getting any sleep that night.
I cooked a gammon joint and a chicken. Roast spuds, parsnips, veg (no fucking sprouts) and home made stuffing and mini sausages wrapped up in jamón, because you can’t buy those things here unless you go to a British supermarket and buy frozen shite.
Christmas Day is usually for going to the bar for drinks and free tapas.
Not yesterday as it rained all day.
Mrs Cunter was stuffing her face with the chocolates which I brought her.
The teasing cunt.
She knows that I can’t eat them.
Today we will get dressed into some warm clothes and wander down the beach into town.
A few drinks in a bar and then home for a kip.
I would rather be working but every business is shut until the 7th January.
5
I am delighted to report we had un-mucked about with sprouts yesterday. Splendid. We also had no carrots which was was better. There is still a marvellous looking savoy cabbage lurking in the kitchen! Brilliant.
I wonder what sweets Paul Chuckle chose this year? Quality Street are a no-no obviously. The selections boxes were wank this year; no proper cut out games on the back of the boxes ffs. Perhaps he went all posh a chose a box of Anton Berg chocolate liqueurs?
Have a marvellous Boxing Day, everyone.
4
Boiling the little cunts until they look and taste like they’ve been left in Rayners knickers for a week should be a capital offence.
Disgraceful.
Merry Boxing Day to you all.
5
That made me gag 😂
5
Rayner’s knickers are a good source of nutrition if you’ve ran out of Prince’s Crab Paste.
Just turn them inside out and rub on hot toast for a piquant crustacean-based snack.
7
That should be the ultimate test, only a true Brit likes Sprouts.
Make them part of the citizenship test, along with bacon, sausage and egg.
I can’t say I like them but don’t mind them, the same with any vegetable, why don’t some people ‘like’ parsnips. If I had to choose a favourite it would savoy cabbage.
Just watching the news and apparently an atmospheric river swept across California yesterday, amazing 😂
5
Mrnin’ all. Sprouts need to have had at least one frost on them to start the natural sugars.It,s why they are a winter veg.
Picking sprouts on an open frosty hard as iron field in early December, old gaberdeen raincoat and wooly fingerless gloves .Happy happy memories.
And yes you do need a cross cut in the base;- it’s traditional.
8
Just like your human imports Triton, the bulk of Brussel sprouts that you get at this time of year are from North Africa.
Morocco to be precise.
They have never had a frost on them.
You import from other countries when there is a growing season.
Therefore a proportion of your traditional Christmas dinner has been handled by smelly sand PákÃs.
Yet another reason not to eat them.
4
Starmer of course loves Brussel sprouts.
4
Still on the stick I suppose.
6
I like all greens apart from fucking brussels and peas!
The devils inventions
3
Today’s our day for the sprouts.
Yesterday we were at our daughter’s, and they always do a ‘not the traditional Xmas dinner’ meal. Last year they made four or five different curries with all the trimmings. This year it was sort of Italian; pan con tomate, pasta, and a delicious home made lemon cheesecake.
So we’re having roast lamb today, roast spuds, etc and of course sprouts, but we’ll eat in the evening I think. By about midnight I’ll be farting for England.
Hope all you guys are enjoying a peaceful and happy time.
3
I like my sprouts nice and soft, boiled to a vapour. But whichever way their cooked i always end up doing the loudest most grotesque farts that make me want to vomit let alone any poor soul that’s in my vicinity
2
I like sprouts but those pigs in blankets i can eat like popcorn.
Love the little bastards.
Best part of a Christmas Dinner.
Wonder what our prime minister had?
Probably something bland.
Something lacklustre.
The boring cunt.
2
Probably Lord Ali. I hope the cunts give each other a dose of Aids.
3
Allegedly
1
Probably rimmed Lammy’s arsehole while giving him a hand around the dirty cunt
1