Socially and Environmentally Aware Product Promotion

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Back in the day, manufacturers tried to encourage us to buy their products by promotioning them as ‘new!’ and ‘improved!’, better than the other guy’s ‘ordinary’ whatever-it-is.

They still do this of course, but in these times of social and environmental awareness, it’s no longer enough to push your product as merely superior to others. No, these days you’ve also got to demonstrate your virtue as a ‘responsible’ supplier.

This was brought home to me the other day as I unloaded the shopping when the wife and I got back from the supermarket. Take our Kleenex tissues for instance. The packaging assured us that ‘we want to do our bit to reduce our impact on the planet; our pack is 100% recyclable and we are looking to reduce and reuse as much plastic as we can’. Didn’t stop you from wrapping the twin pack in plastic film though did it?

Then there was our surface cleanser. These days it doesn’t just kill 99.9% of all bacteria, but ‘contains no bleach, no dyes, and is pH neutral’ (whatever the fuck that is’). To top things off, the ‘bottle is made with 50% recycled plastic’. The floor cleaner has its own angle. The container certifies it to be ‘cruelty free’ and ‘vegan’, as does that of the bathroom cleaner, which has the bonus of only containing ‘natural oils’.

Foodstuffs are just the same as well. I was pleased to learn that our ice cream contains ‘sustainably grown, handpicked bourbon vanilla; the container being ‘made with 93% less plastic’. Our ketchup contains ‘no artificial colourings, flavourings, preservatives or thickeners’, and is ‘gluten free, and suitable for vegetarians and vegans’. Well of course.

It turned out that just about every item had some blurb on the front which promoted it on the basis of one or another aspect of ‘responsible’ production. I’m heartened to see that manufacturers are now taking their obligations to both the consumer and to the planet seriously.

Of course, they might actually not give a toss. This could all be just another marketing ploy to make us feel better and more at ease psychologically, and therefore more inclined to buy. It could all be just about that bottom line. No… they couldn’t possibly be THAT cynical.

Could they?

Cheeky Panda Products.

Nominated by : Ron Knee

110 thoughts on “Socially and Environmentally Aware Product Promotion”

  2. Read in Sky News yesterday Tupperware is going to go bust. The journalist sagely said that it must be done to more green conscious purchasing. I call bullshit, it’s down to the cheap shit you can buy anywhere now. Which, I’ve no doubt, causes far more plastic waste. But mainstream media is also on this absurd mission to come up with non commercial reason why products fail. Cunts.

    • I remember my childhood best mate’s mum having a tupperware party..

      She was stunning. Like a young Brooke Hayward with big tits.
      I also remember she came down stairs once in just her bath towel to get her cigarettes. Too much for a 13 year old lad.

    • After hundreds of millions of years nothing has evolved with a zero emissions arse so what chance have we got with road vehicles? Less than controlled fusion, I’d say. Controlled farting is equally unachievable.

  5. Unfortunately I suffer with rheumatoid arthritis and can’t clean up after myself. But fortunately living alone, I sneeze into the dusty air without using anything to cover my nose. I then blow my nose into the sink like a tramp and wash the remainder from my face and rinse the rest away. After a shit I use one sheet of toilet paper and wash the remainder off into the sink/bidet. I rarely wash and change my clothes, due to only having myself for company.

  6. I take all my non recyclable soft plastic to the CooP to be recycled.

    I have never bought a product because it has been sustainably sourced, contains recycled plastic, cardboard or any other possibility, I wonder if Katie Price’s snatch has been recycled, the rest of her has been through the wringer 🤮

  7. So Ron, your surface cleanser contains no bleach, no dyes and is pH neutral.
    In my book that’s what is known as ‘water’.

    • White vinegar, sodium bicarbonate, squirt of jif lemon is all you need for a excellent surface cleaner. Try it Ron, you won’t be disappointed and it’ll save you money 🤑

      • Thanks Jill, will give that a try!

        Already using white vinegar as a moss and lichen killer; 50-50 mix with water, and two big teaspoonfuls of salt. Conventional weed killers won’t touch moss and lichen, but the vinegar mix kills it stone dead.

      • I’ll try that, Ron.

        I found a product called Wet and Forget very effective on wood, but not so great on tarmac or flagstones, not to mention hideously expensive!

      • Excellent tip, Gill.
        I might try that later garnished with an olive 🫒 and a few ice cubes. 🍸

      • @JP;

        I’ve found it very effective JP.

        Best results for me? Sprayed on when the weather is cool and cloudy, but dry.

        You might find a second application necessary after 2-3 days if it does rain after you’ve applied the mixture, also in the case of very widespread coverage of moss and lichen.

        Just buy the cheapest white vinegar you can find.

      • Thank you, Ron.

        I have a really nice garden at the front of the house, but the constant moss battle gets very wearing.

        I’ll give it a go on Saturday ( rain tomorrow) and let you know how it goes.

        Cheers!

      • Be sure to titrate carefully for that pH neutral. Or go wild, bicarb volcano never gets old.

    • Not quite Geordie.

      It contains ‘non-ionic surfactants’ and EDTA, so I’m suitably impressed.

      It’s also certified as ‘vegan’, and contains raspberries and pomegranate (as all good cleaners should) so I’m sure they’ll be able to swig it quite happily.

      • When Wes Streeting (the two parent, one parent family boy), was growing up both his mum and dad bought that lavatory bleach that clears 99% of all known germs.

        The only problem was there were quite a few unknown germs when little Wessy took a shit

  8. TV motor ads really piss me off. No more petrol or diesel ads, only battery. If that’s not politically motivated enviro-brainwashing I don’t know what is. Just to be sure, I’ll ask N’Knobo and Te-sha Atishoo, the only cunts that the advertisers seem to think able to afford and drive one.

    • Dead right Isabel. I can only think that all this advertising of glorified milk floats is intended to beat us into submission. EVs are unsaleable to the private buyer and the manufacturers have stopped making them because they have thousands of them parked up waiting for a buyer. What I can’t be bothered with are products with poor performance and a high price which the makers try to persuade me to buy on their “green” credentials and the EV is a text book example. A related area is tyres. EVs have skinny low rolling resistance tyres in a desperate attempt to spin out their range before the battery goes flat. Unfortunately, as is well known in the tyre industry, low rolling resistance means low grip. I only buy tyres with an “A” rating for wet grip and a low rating for fuel efficiency i.e. rolling resistance. Apart from the potential danger, the first time you prang the car because you ran out of grip any piddling savings you made in fuel will be wiped out for ever. Also if you like good handling buy the highest speed rating you can get. As for the ratings given now for external noise? Do fuck off.

      • Good point Arfur.
        Also, a mate of mine owns his own tyre fitting company and he was invited by Michelin to a seminar/piss up when they launched those ratings.
        The fuel efficiency one is utter bollocks.
        The difference between the highest fuel rating and the lowest is half a litre….per year!
        Go for grip and forget the other shit.

  9. The one that drives me nuts is “ethically sourced coffee.”

    The definition of which is:

    “These coffees follow a strict set of rules intended to improve not only the environment but the living conditions of the small farmers who produced them.”

    Oh fuck you! Just give me my fucking coffee or the environment around here will deteriorate real fucking fast and you’ll have to seek medical attention to improve your wounds.

    Just once I’d like to buy some unethically sourced coffee.

    “We cut down the rain forest and exploited the peasants in order to satisfy our need for bigger profits and live a luxury lifestyle.”

    CAUTION: This product may contain bits and pieces of small children and exotic animals.

  10. Or we’ve reduced the size of our product to promote healthier eating options and reduce the amount of packaging to combat CLIMATE CHANGE, but left the price the same or the really cheeky feckers increase it.

    • ‘It’s full of Cadbury goodness but very small and neat, a finger of fudge is just enough to give your kids a treat’

      ‘A Mars a day helps you work, rest and play’

      They’ve been punting sugar, fats and colourings as healthy eating options for yonks, the cunts.

  11. Quite so.

    Just the other day I had to choose between some cans of stout..there were 2,one proclaimed how good for the environment it was and the other didn’t..

    Of course I chose the cans that didn’t tell me saving the polar bears and koalas was a good idea.

    Any company or product that says its “eco friendly” can Fuck Off.

    Virtue signalling cunts.

  12. Somewhat ironic that the kind of cunts who market this stuff and their target audiences are usually off their tits on definitely not organically farmed and definitely chemically produced cocaine.

  14. My recycle bin sits in the back corner of my back yard. I only use the trash bins. I refuse to participate in this total bullshit. It is all trash. My city pays someone to go around and inspect at random the recycle bins when they are set out. This person who lives on my tax dollars then ties on a note with either congratulatory praise for being in compliance, or a warning about prohibited contents or a fine for repeat offenders.
    I’m safe. For now.
    My most valuable commodity is time. I refuse to waste time (& water) washing out bottles and containers to just throw them away.
    Whatever the solution is to our waste, I don’t see the current methods of recycling as viable.
    Wassup y’all?

    • I shove all the shite inside the “ recyclable trash”. Eg beer cans filled with chips etc. Just to fuck them off. Every tin of peas in a steel can gets an ally can rammed in it.

      We all know it’s just virtue signalling bollocks. It gets piled up for years then ahem “accidentally” catches fire, or it’s exported to somewhere that gives no fucks, who buries it or chucks it in the sea.

  15. To me this marketing is just more cynical p.r. trash, designed to make us feel more ‘responsible’ and therefore more at ease as consumers, and therefore more likely to purchase the product. Ultimately it’s all about the profit margin I’m sure.

    The thing is, once everybody does it, won’t the efforts just cancel each other out?

    Afternnon all.

  16. What I do hate is made up words used in today’s advertising.

    A Tango Orange advert that says ‘Citrusy’ or ‘Zingy”. There’s no such fucking word.

    Same goes for ‘Choclatey’ and ‘Choclatier’. OK, Choclatier is a word, but I still hate it. No one (except a complete cunt) gives a fuck if if it’s hand made by some twat in Switzerland, as long as it tastes nice and they can eat it.

    And that learning difficulties skank, Dani Dyer on that washing liquid advert.
    ‘Everyfin’s perf wiv Surf.’

    Perf? Illiterate fucking pig.

  17. I love recycling me one week it’s red bin next week green bin, 1 week everything in the red bin next week everything in the green bin.

    • I’ve packed in sorting out my recyclables.

      Everything in the dustbin.

      Fuck em…if we are giving this country to the peaceful goat shaggers , then as far as I am concerned let’s turn it into a place they feel more comfortable..

      A FUCKING BIG PILE OF SHIT….⚒️

    • Now our council has started to collect rubbish fortnightly we burn ours, that’s much better for environment, they’ve even stopped coming up the drive with their 7.5 ton bin motor on the grounds it’s to narrow even though Grundon come up twice a month with an 8 wheeler

  18. What gets on my tits is the ” drink responsibly” message on alcohol.

    What? I’m hardly going to inject it into my eyeballs, am I?

    • Yes, it’s just like the ‘responsible gambling’ crap spewed out by bookies.

      Like they care if somebody loses his shirt.They just want to make it look as though they feel some sort of moral obligation, when everybody knows that it’s just for show. I seriously suspect that no fucks are given.

  19. The wife just reminded me that there’s a term for this kind of stuff; ‘greenwashing’.

    I like it.

  20. I would like to assure readers that we at Boggs Pornographic Film Productions (Taiwan) Ltd take our responsibilities to the enviroment very seriously indeed. All our beautiful and artistic films are sent with no plastic at all – we use cardboard covers and packaging materials and not even Sellotape, we use that horrible gummed brown paper which tastes like the gusset of Analease Dodd’s knickers.

    Of course in wet weather this CAN cause problems, and I should publically like to offer profuse apologies to The Very Reverend Ivor Barebotty, of The Vicarage, Little Whipping, Beds for the embarrassment caused to him when his copy of “Randy Sister Virtue’s Convent Lesbian Orgy” arrived minus it’s wrapping. We can only too well appreciate the embarrassment this caused not only to him, but to Sister Virtue and the postman involved.

    • Is ‘Sister Virtue’s Lesbian Strap-on Orgy’ still available Mr Boggs?

      A neighbour happened to mention yesterday that he was looking for a copy…

      • Not at the moment, Ron, but we are considering a new series of budget two for one films – the two Yvette Does Anals for example, and if we get enough requests we might reissue the film your friend wants, together with Convent Nights, which, it is believed, helped kill the previous Pope. Poor old chap it took 3 days to get the coffin lid down.

      • A guy I know in the States has advance bootleg copies of two new Boggs Productions.

        Copper Balls and Anal Ease…follows the raucous adventures of 2 newly empowered Cabinet Ministerettes as they try to ram their agenda through the back doors of Parliament.

        And Kweer Notions…the musings of a newly elected PM who is trying to make the British public swallow his…mandate.

  21. How many times do you see stuff like coffee or avocados marketed as fairtrade, helping farmers from some South American shithole. What they don’t tell you is a single avocado tree needs almost 600 litres of water a week or that Mexican drugs gangs use the lucrative avocado trade with the U.S to finance their activities. All electric car batteries use cobalt, no mention of poor M’tembe down the cobalt mine in the DRC for 15 hours a day but don’t worry, think of the polar bears!

  23. Utter, unchallenged bullshit like ‘our bacon is produced using only hand reared pigs’. What? In Sainsbury’s?
    Every fucking one in the country?
    And Free Range turkeys at Christmas.
    It was once estimated that if every turkey consumed at Christmas actually was truly free range, it would require farming space the size of Yorkshire,
    We’re led to believe we are being fully informed, but we’re just being taken for cunts.

  24. If you could just give those cunts all your money it would save bandwidth from them having to indoctrinate the fuckwit contingent.

  25. Arabella and I always insist on our Levantine quinoa and freekeh being ethically-sourced, sustainably-farmed, natural, organic, vegan, free range, fairtrade, dairy-free, gluten-free and packaged in a nut-free environment.

    Only the best for us and our little bundles of joy Ferdie and Maisie.

  26. I’m quite content knowing that a food product I’m purchasing is gluten-free. As for the rest of the bollocks written on the packaging, they can fuck off.

    • I’m of the opinion that tolerance to gluten lessens with age.

      I find that, if I eat more than two slices of bread from a pensioners loaf ( that’s one of those that’s about half the size of a standard one, but costs the same ) , I get bloated, and very
      uncomfortable.

      I’ve tried sourdough, muffins, bagels, even rye bread, but nothing makes a bacon butty taste as good.

      I’ll just have to carry on suffering for my (f)art.

      • Seems to be the case JP.

        Thw wife was fine once upon a time, then at 40 she took it very badly, and is now acutely gluten intolerant.

        Weird.

      • Well my “intolerance” to gluten is auto-immune as I have Coeliac Disease which only triggered (at the same time as the auto-immune disease Psoriasis) in 2018 at the age of 36 after I took a vaccine.

        If what you’re saying is true, then I’ll be able to eat some bread or pasta without shitting myself when I’m in my 60s or 70s which is quite a while to wait and I think the only reason for that might be immunosenescence which happens with old age. Sadly that means a less resilient immune system over all. Kind of a double-edged sword.

      • Derp! I completely misread your post. I thought you said gluten “intolerance” lessens with age but you said “tolerance”. I guess I’m resigned to a life of wheat and barley abstinence.

  27. I loved some of those adds from the 60’s & the 70’s. Of course they would be banned now. No sooties or tree swingers in them either.

  28. Some of the packaging has so much green bullshit all over it you have a job figuring out what’s in the fucking thing.. Net zero co2 production, friendly to the soil, guaranteed grown by community of organic farmers blah, blah, blah knobend that’s all it is. Bullshit for the brainwashed

  29. It’s horse shit. Swallowed hook line and sinker by the gullible and used as an excuse by cunts like Milliband to spaff away taxpayers hard earned on some WEF endorsed vanity project.

    Any plant based foodstuff cannot ever be carbon free or carbon neutral, whatever the fuck that means.

    Carbon Dioxide is a fundamental requirement in plant growth on this planet.

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