Royal Mail [14]

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A First Class cunting (but you can’t be sure it will arrive next day) for Royal Mail who on October 7th will for the second time this year rise the price of a First Class stamp to 1.65

This hideous company, whose chairmen in recent years are too incompetent to arrange a fuck in a brothel, are really taken liberties now. It will decimate the mail order business for one thing. Even now, it is not unusual for a 1st class letter to take two days to arrive.

Still I suppose it i all part of Adolf Starmer’s “progressive politics” – you notice not a word of recrimination for the governing party.:

Daily Express.

Nominated by : W. C. Boggs

49 thoughts on “Royal Mail [14]”

  2. Quite so Mr Boggs.

    I’ve been buying items from abroad for many years and the only time there is any trouble is when stuff gets into the hands of Royal Mail and its equally fucking awful cousin Parcel Force..

    Indeed PF are a den of thieves,I’ve had fully insured tracked parcels from abroad simply disappear never to be seen again once they get involved..and by involved I mean just stealing my valuables like the rag pickers they are.

    Trades Union jobsworth corporate Cunts.

    Good morning.

  4. My wife’s the one to buy stamps but she’s not bought 1st class in a decade or more, only 2nd and she even resents that. Like she says “I’m not paying 1st class prices for a 3rd class service”. Fuck ’em.

  5. Royal Fail and Parcel Farce are, as I’ve said before useless and should have their charters, operating licences removed.

    My latest escapade with the Farce involved a large item that was tracked ‘on the van’ from the depot to my address and ‘attempted delivery’ made, but it wasn’t. I was in all day for the delivery and took screenshots of the drivers route. The individual never got within 10miles of the property.

    After numerous calls and complaints it transpired that the operative didn’t load the parcel ‘because the van wasn’t big enough’ but still continued to enter waypoint and delivery ETAs to the tracking app.

    The manager confirmed the item was still held in the depot and I drove around trip of 100miles to get it myself the next day.

    Im convinced the fuckers are running some sort of thieving operating, Avoid.

    As for the RM, we get a bundles of letters, bills, fliers maybe once a week if lucky.

    Gawd help you if you need an NHS appointment sent by letter….

    • Funny you should say that. Last week my wife got a letter to amend an appointment she knew nothing about. The letter for the original appointment didn’t come till the following day. There was something like 2 weeks between the dates on the letters.

  6. “Royal Mail”

    I’m sure they’ll be using the additional money raised to fulfill important corporate objectives such as rebranding themselves to “Royal Non-Binary”

  8. Bunch of thieving cunts. A mate bought a pair of trainers for his grandson and when they didn’t show up made enquiries.
    Now I kid you not, he was sent a video of the postie appearing to be posting a package through his letterbox.
    Firstly he had no package at all, secondly I believe shoes come in a box considerably to large to go through a fucking letterbox.
    Lo and behold after further aggravation and phone calls etc. The trainers were eventually located supposedly having been delivered a few doors down by mistake!
    I assume the operative in question would have been dismissed but no doubt that would be down to ethnicity.
    No apology from the royal mail.
    What a fucking shitshow.

  9. The whole outfit is a fucking disgrace.
    Have you seen the state of their vans?
    I’ve seen battered and sun bleached Royal Mail vans driving around that are more than 14 years old. They must have mileage similar to the starship enterprise.
    My point is, there’s absolutely no pride in the brand and that is reflected in the appalling service they provide.
    Parcel Farce are probably even worse as a business model.
    There’s been an almighty increase in parcel deliveries with the advent of internet shopping, and the cunts missed the boat completely.
    What a pair of cunts.

    • I have never seen a Royal Mail van without stoved-in and gouged bodywork. It’s as if the drivers think they are on a perpetual banger race day at Arena Essex.

      No pride in the brand whatsoever.

    • Funny thing Field Marshal, all their vans around here as well look as though they were formerly driven around North Africa by the SAS c.1941.

      What pisses me off as well is all the advertising crap they persist in stuffing through my letterbox. They really do care about all those trees being chopped down.

      On the principle that the polluter pays, I collect it and when I’ve got a wad about a couple of inches thick, simply stick it back in the nearest post box. I heartily recommend other cunters to do the same.

      Morning all.

      • That’s a great idea Ron.
        I’m fucked off with all the crap posted through my door.
        No signs appear to make a difference wether my wording is polite or more aggressive, presumably because most of the posties don’t read English and I’m never able to catch one to warn them in person so fuck it they can have all the crap I don’t want straight back.

      • Our most recent postie (we get through one every year or so) told me he hates the leaflets but he reckons that they’re the only thing keeping the company going, I agree.

  10. I’ve been sending Christmas, New Year and Birthday cards that are advertised online, for a number of years, even with the appropriate names of family and friends, all arriving at the speed of light from here, for fuck all.

    • A few years ago we hand delivered Christmas cards by car in the city, the petrol was cheaper than the fucking stamps. We only posted long distance cards.

    • Moving from rented house to own place 20 years ago. Paid a fee for ‘postal relocation’ service. So any mail addressed to me or the missus going to the old place, be redirected to the new place for a month. Forty quid cost.

      1 momth in, both the missus & I realise neither of us has gotten our individual monthly credit card statements/bills.

      Made a visit to the old – still empty – address (50 miles from the new one) to find 9 items missed by the ‘service’, n the month whilst only 1 had been redirected. 90% failure rate.

      I called the cunts every name under the sun and got a refund but that was simply as bare-minimum as imaginable, the cunts. Not an ounce of shame or contrition for BEING such a collection of useless cunts, either.

      As I wrote in the letter of the time, (to the ‘head of relocation service’ (DICKhead of relocation service, more like!) .. 1 mistake might MAYBE have been understandable.. but 9 out of 10?

      • Not in my case, though, .. envelopes all 9 .. just all-out shameless ineptitude.

        Why didn’t you have your address changed with the cc company in advance?, one might ask … ANOTHER bunch of arseholes who claim to need several weeks to do something (alter addresses) that in reality should be done by the end of a single working day!

  11. “Royal Mail will attempt delivery of your package today.”
    (“attempt”…lol)
    “We were unable to attempt delivery today, we will attempt delivery tomorrow.”
    Next day:
    “We tried to deliver your package but nobody was at home (not true) we will attempt again tomorrow or provide alternative address.”
    I provided alternative, my employer.
    “Thank you for providing alternative delivery address, we will attempt delivery tomorrow.”
    Next day:
    We attempted to deliver your package today but nobody was at home, we will attempt again tomorrow or provide alternative delivery address.”
    FFS!, God give me strength.
    Next day:
    “We will attempt delivery of your package today to the alternative address you provided.”
    No delivery.
    Next day:
    Your package has been delivered.”
    Delivered to home address, not the alternative address provided and left outside front door in the rain.
    Next day:
    We will attempt to deliver your package today.”
    Fuck off.

  12. I ordered a noise reducing speaker for my new Icom R 9500 (well worth having a looking up if you are into ham radio) it was sent Royal Mail 48 hour last Tuesday . It has yet to arrive and we are experiencing a few thunderstorms today so I doubt it will be delivered today. It may arrive Monday after 144 hours.
    Having said that I have had to disconnect all my antennas due to the storms so perhaps I am just being a grumpy old sod like most of us on IsAC.

      • A couple of radio hams!. Great. I used to listen to shortwave years ago. 73s to you.

        One of the problems with Royal Mail is that we no longer have regular postmen, they come in for a day or two then they go. Kentish Town has become the Bermuda Triangle for posties. My old postman, Gary came here for years, always cheerful would leave packages under the gate if I wasn’t in, and would often call in for a chat, & a cup of tea and he’d tell me filthy jokes. Just like a son he was to me. He left in the end because he said it was getting unbearable to work for the,.

      • We had the same postie for years, W.C.

        Throughout the 70s to the early 90s, he had a proper uniform, the cap, all that. He was very good st his job and he was a friendly and well liked fellow. He used to get a Christmas card every year and often had a cuppa with my old nana and my mum. There was even a whip round for a present when he finally retired. A top man. Made one proud to be British.

        Now, we have scruffy mumbling tattooed cunts in shorts, who stroll around at 2pm, throwing rubber bands all over the road. Thick lazy cunts, who can’t tell the difference between a 6 and a 9. And even when they’ve got a red van, the cunts still turn up inthe afternoon.

        Our old postie, Bernard (RIP) was in his uniform and on his bicycle in all weathers at 7-8am.

  13. Maybe the royal mail have been taking tips from our collection of parasitic politicians..

    Something they like turns up at the depot just take it and if anyone questions it..
    Plead ignorance and say fair do’s.

    • Kweer and Rayner – and even fucking Rachel Reeves all say they are no longer going to accept clothes…….. no doubt they will still accept the MONEY to buy clothes (“Lord Alli, duckie?. It”s Rodders here. I desperately need some new jackboots, would you like to send me a cheque, dear?. I need really good expensive German ones”).

      As for Reeves, cheeky tart – the old rags she wears look as if they come out of the bargain bin at Oxfam – those horrible thin mens trousers she always wears, with her arse wobbling up and down in them. She never seems to wear anything else. They must smell as rank as old AnalEase does.

  14. I had a parcel left outside my front door for two days , raining like buggery too. The bellend of a postie being too spazzed out to knock the fucking door. His replacement was leaving letters out in the rain as he did not know where the letterboxes were!!!

    I had to educate the twat myself. Fucking go down that path there and turn right you cunt. We had to dry out cheques and all sorts of letters, re hospital appointments.

  16. Amazon are of course, nasty, tax-avoiding morality-free cunts, but you can’t deny their service.
    I ordered a book on Thurday, it was waiting for me yesterday upon my return from work.
    Whereas parcel force recently lost a large box containing rare as rocking horse shit carburetors.
    Utterly useless twats.

  17. One afternoon last year I was parked next to a Royal Mail letterbox while waiting for my daughter.
    At 4.10 pm a Royal Mail van turned up and parked next to me. There were two posties on board who spent the next 20 minutes playing on their phones. At 4.30pm one of them got out and opened the postbox and took out the one letter that was inside it. They then drove off.

    If that little episode is typical then the Royal Mail business is in its death throes.

  18. My birthday was last month. Brother one who lives in Yorkshire posted my card 1st class 8 days before my B.D and it arrived 2days late. Brother two in Gillingham, used 2nd class posted card 7 days before birthday and it arrived 1 day late. I only live in Belvedere not another fucking country. Will probably post the Christmas cards at the beginning of November and keep fingers 🤞🏻 that they arrive before new year.😡

    • Whilst petrol is £1.30 a litre it will be cheaper to drive there and back for the price of a 1st class stamp soon enough.

  19. Same old shit like the rest of the UK service sector.

    The price rises here are indicative of a company scrambling around to keep the lights turned on for another 6 months. Each increase comes with them being less competitive, losing more custom, meaning more price increases until the loss of custom is too great.

    Hopefully Amazon will buy them out. Much better than those cunts of a government getting involved and writing all debts off meaning a trail of private sector creditors end up collapsing.

    Funny we are told to look towards the middle East for threats, yet the Labour and Conservative governments over the last 25 years have done more damage to the UK and any of these terrorist factions.

    Anyway, sidetracked… I’m awaiting a carbon fibre gear shifter from EVRI between 10:30 – 11:30. I wonder if it will turn up or if I will get a message at 11:31 saying: “couldn’t be fucked, will deliver it at a later date wne o can be, if I can be fucked.”

    “Cos it’s another day for you. You and me in paradise.”

      • Same moggie. We had a really reliable chap who was very respectful of property for 2 years who recently I think retired.

        Been through some different drivers recently, it was a new one today. Good chap, arrived 20 mins after the time but made an effort, knocked and waited. Good stuff!

  20. They’re on the way out and are just creaming as much moolah as possible before it all goes busto. A new owner, some Czech billionaire or summink.
    As an aside, despite me filling in their damn form to be taken off the junk mail list some months back, I’m still getting junk mail so have now taken to saving this shit up in a pile before posting it back to the sorting office.
    The recycling bin is next to the door, use it you cat bothering wankers.

  21. I was sent round with the truck to our local Royal Mail delivery depot.
    I said to the service department supervisor “Alright chap, I’m here to pick up one of your vans to take in for accident damage repair”
    He looked at me in despair and said “follow me”. He then took me to the yard where all their vans were parked and said “which one?”

  22. I work from my house all the time , however I still get those cards “ you weren’t in, so we couldn’t deliver your parcel”

    I pretty much never ever go anywhere , they must even creep up the drive to deliver the card because I’d hear them otherwise . Massive bunch of lying cunts

    • I was waiting for a delivery when I got the ‘you weren’t in’ bollocks. Lying cunt. I saw you stop at the end of my drive, rummage around in the back of the van, then fuck off. What you mean is you either couldn’t find the package or you forgot to load it. But yeah, my fault.

      • Happened to me too several times.”Your parcel is out for delivery” yes whatever.Useless tossers.

    • Rumour has it they give those out when they don’t have the parcel on them. So instead you get a communist coloured token through the door.

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