Joshua Addyman

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His card was stolen, and the Thicko Twins used it to buy, amongst other things, scratchcards.
Amazingly, one card was a £4m winner.
Naturally, the Twins went on a rampage of boozing and partying ( presumably using Joshua’s card?), until the scratchcard company refused to payout, the police got involved and the idiots have got their just desserts.

The Sun

Is Joshua happy that the criminals were caught, his credit rating isn’t damaged?
Yes, probably, but he now thinks he should have at least some of the £4m, on the grounds that his card was used to buy the ticket.
Really, you cunt?

The money has already been donated to charity, thieves don’t get to keep the proceeds of their crimes, unless you want to say that you voluntarily gave them your card??
Hmm! Thought not.

Nominated by: Jeezum Priest

73 thoughts on “Joshua Addyman”

  1. Hopefully they used this card to chop up lines of coke and he gets charged with being an accessory to a crime.

    A story about two cunts is now a story about three cunts.

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  2. I remember this one JP – didn’t he offer to split the proceeds with the thieves who stole his debit card? I’d wondered what had happened to this case as this was about ten years ago if I recall correctly.

    Indifferent to this story, but I’ll say he’s a cunt as a precaution.

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  4. So one of the thieves wrote his card number down on his hand?

    So how do you use a hand to buy scratchcards..
    Nonsense journalism..
    The story was written by Harvey price..

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  5. Before going any further with this, I’d want to know how the thieves came in possession of the card. If the owner is foolishly to blame, I’m not going to bother being arsed.

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  6. I am in two minds over this.

    The fucking scratch card company are perfectly happy to accept payment from anywhere, in this case a stolen credit card, but only if the result is not a win.

    They certainly don’t check details at the point of sale.

    They then investigate after their unfair odds of tens of millions to one are miraculously beaten.

    Is that acceptable?
    I don’t think so.

    What if a winner was found to have used money that he should have spent on child support, or if he had found money in the street and not reported his find to the police?
    Or if he had a court ordered fine outstanding?

    Having a scratch card company check out whether a winner is worthy after they have taken his money doesn’t seem right to me.

    I don’t know what the legal age is for buying a scratch card in the UK, but I am sure that the Pákí shop owners that sell them have never asked for ID.

    Scratch cards are a rip off.
    You beat astronomical odds for a fraction of a return.

    The scratch card companies should not be allowed to act as another layer of policing, regardless of the circumstances.

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    • This is a good point.

      A close family member works for the scratchcard company in question, and he confirms they are indeed cunts

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    • Can’t really go along with you on this one Artful. There have been payouts by gambling companies to various low lifes and criminals over the years. I think the significant factor here is that a stolen instrument was used directly to defraud the lottery. The principle of checking the veracity of information when claims are made is common throughout the system. For instance you could have bought insurance on your Capri much more cheaply if you had told the insurance company it was a 1600. Trouble is when you made a claim and the assessor noticed an Essex block in the wreck they would have bounced your claim and also put a mark against your name on the register. As for our Josh trying to claim the money, suppose I had a legally held shotgun which was stolen and then used to stick up the Co-op. Would I have a claim on the contents of the till taken by the felons?

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      • Or if they’d killed someone with it , would Josh have taken the murder charge on the chin ??

      • Thinking back Arfur.

        All those year’s ago car insurance premiums were always relatively high, especially for a performance car.
        But we knew which broker to go to for the cheapest deal.

        The risk was that the insurance company that we used, and I can’t remember their name, had a reputation for not paying out.

        Being young and just wanting to put a fast car on the road, we didn’t really care.
        All we wanted was the piece of paper to show the police when we got stopped, which was often.

        I am sure that there are still dodgy insurance companies around today who were just like that.

        You have an accident and they refuse to pay because you didn’t declare a modification of your car.
        That modification could be something as insignificant as cutting holes in the parcel shelf for extra loud speakers.

        These insurance companies were and are cunts.
        We knew that the possibility of being paid anything for a claim was zero, but other policy holders would have been caught out.

        The scratch card company is acting in the same way.
        They take money without the normal checks and then look for a reason not to pay out.

        Even though they might find a justified reason they are still cunts for taking the money without any checks.

        If they look deep enough I am sure that they could find any number of reasons not to pay out anything, ever.

        But of course, that would be ridiculous and they would soon lose all their customers.

        So they are willing to pay out on small winnings, like the amounts paid out by the shop keeper who sold the ticket, but the moment that a larger win is claimed then they start to look for a reason not to pay.

        Both sides involved in this nom are cunts.

  7. Going on a ‘stealing safari’ in Londonistan was their first mistake. Two white northerners stealing from people are going to stand out like Diane Abbott at the salad buffet.

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  11. I think the Northern thieves should be allowed to keep it
    They really enjoyed themselves!
    Went on the piss proper.

    Joshua is from London.
    He’d of spunked it on lipstick and having his hair permed.
    Or donated it to Palestine.

    Fuck him.

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  12. I see. If some bloke had dropped a fiver in the pub and this wanker had pocketed it and ended up winning £4 millions would he have handed it all over if the landlord had said, “Harry dropped a fiver in here last Wednesday. Has anybody seen it?”.
    This cunt would probably say that he’d barrow it all round to Harry’s straight after closing time. Fuck off Joshua, you unrealistic grasping twat.

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    • I think her punishment should be to be straightened out by a real man.

      Only too happy to do my bit for the community.

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      • By no stretch of the imagination have these lads been groomed. They loved it.

        Granted, she must be a bit of a psycho bitch with daddy issues, but aren’t they all a bit like that?

        It IS different when the full grown is a female, except when the male is clearly a child, where this pair were clearly not children.

        As for grooming, isn’t ALL sex a result of some form of ‘grooming’? Flowers, expensive jewellery, foreign holidays, posh dinners in swanky restaurants, 5 star hotel rooms, etc. Fixing the car for her, building a patio, whatever, all in the hope that she’ll put out. Men and women have known the rules of the game for millenia, and agree to play by them.

        Unless, of course, you are from Newcastle, in which case it’s extra gravy with your chips and a knee-trembler in the bus shelter.

      • Oh Termy, you are such a cynic. I agree with you Arch, at that age I would have thought it was fucking Christmas come early only better. Then I got to thinking, if I had a fifteen year old son who I discovered was getting his end away with his thirty year old teacher I guess I would feel I would have to admonish him but in reality I would think he was pretty smart. However had I discovered that one of my fifteen year old daughters was getting laid by her thirty year old teacher I would have been fucking outraged. I suppose that rates as a glaring dual standard.

      • No it doesn’t Arfur, men and women are inherently different on every level, therefore different rules apply.

  15. A stealing safari?

    I guessbit is London so safari is probably the right word.

    I just wonder why the journalist named the brand of bourbon the kleptomaniacs drank and none of the others?
    Jack Daniels shoukd sue for being singled out and associated with low life scrotes.

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    • The Daniels brother created the recipe for this drain cleaner, and one of then, can’t remember which, liked it so much he became an alcoholic. His brother got pissed off with his drunken escapades and locked all his geographical in the safe. After attempting and failing to open the safe, said alky booted the safe, breaking a toe. As alkies do he found some grog somewhere, got bladders for days, neglected the wound and died of the infection.

      Moral of the story is don’t be a prick and hide people’s grog when they’re on a bender

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  16. 4miiiion,
    Do me that.

    New wellies
    Sort out me teeth.
    Treat me dog to a weekend away somewhere.

    Buy one of those fancy deodorant things that movie stars use.
    Buy the wife a new mop.

    Magical.

    Eating Chips n gravy off a solid gold plate.

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      • Lot of people lately saying they’re knees are shot.

        Keep warning my mate who’s a runner, it’ll fuck his knees up.

        Nowt wrong with my knees.
        My best feature they are.

      • It’s certainly the most noticeable JP.

        But I’ve many fine features if I’m honest.

        Cheekbones to die for,
        Dazzling smile
        Eyes like limpit pools
        And a hairline that starts at my shoulders and flows to my sculptured buttocks.

        Although my feet look like something from a horror film 😂

      • I have Hobbit feet, Mis, but very elegant long figured hands.

        A piano players hands, which is ironic, as I’m tone deaf these days, on account of the fact that I’m losing my hearing.

      • Long flat size 13 werewolf feet JP.

        If I go swimming they make kids cry

      • What’s the current pound to dollar rate?

        You could be the new 6 million dollar man JP.

        Steve Austin allegro.

    • I truly dread to think of all the exquisitely warped evil I could undertake with 4 million quid, MNC.
      The first thing would be bribing ISAC’s Admins to rescind your ‘2023 Cunter of the year’ award and retroactively give it to Miles Plastic.

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      • Evening Harold…you’d be straight on a plane once I whatsapped you a pic of a spreadeagled Rosie O’Donnell on the beach, all lubed up with goose fat and waiting to receive you.
        Alas, as you arrive and sprint toward your goal, you see that James Corden has got in there first and is hammering away, so you’ll have to impatiently wait your turn.
        Or have a go on James Corden’s flabby, buttery bottom.

      • You’d be like a Bond villain with 4million Tommy.

        Like the Marquis de sade with a Pam Aryes accent.

        You could have a blood diamond embedded in your bellend!👍

      • 2023 AND 2024.
        Thomas.

        2year running.

        I’m probably going to win 2025?

        🤣

      • Interestingly, when the role of part-time Admin came up recently, I threw my pink leather hat into the ring…
        Imagine the ol’ Cunt Engine as an Admin, could have been fun…
        But, never heard back. They dunno what they missed!

      • I get the feeling the role of admin isn’t suited to you or me Thomas.

        The temptation for mischief and mayhem would be to much for us to resist.

        I would of tortured General Cuntster as a admin😁

        Didn’t bother to apply.

      • Well that’s the meal from 2 hours earlier soon to be coming back up.

        Nick Ross: Don’t have nightmares folks

        Too late Nick. I’ve read one of Thomas’s grotesque stories and I’m cursed with a talent for being able to picture things in my mind’s eye.

      • @Mis did you payoff admin for 2024?

        General Cunster demands a recount!

      • Naw, they just contacted me, said look,
        Your a hard act to follow.
        People don’t want to live in your shadow.
        Will you stay on?
        And to help them out I did.😁

      • imagine the ol’ Cunt Engine as an Admin
        🤔

        that would be like if the Joker became the Mayor of Gotham City.
        😁😁😁

    • You could buy John Bishop’s house with that sort of money. Not just his floorboards and then flash your Turkey teeth at him.

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      • I would share some of the windfall and treat my IsAC chums by buying our way into Dick Fiddlers exclusive gentleman’s members only club.

        JP doing a Sharon Stone in his happi jacket in the snug, Mis drinking Bisto pints in the bar and the waitress hogtied in Cunt Engines car boot.

  17. I actually do post serious stuff occasionally.

    But this was a ” Wankers” post.

    So you can have a laugh.

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  18. What a fucking cunt. If somebody had siphoned-off the petrol from his car and used that petrol to accidentally kill a woman and her baby in a hit-and-run…. I doubt he’d take any measure of blame for it.

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  19. money the fucking root of all evil, and for some old tabbies a better leg opener than a trolley jack, my mates ex has made all her fucking loot from marrying and divorcing, her current husband hates the cunt but won’t divorce her cos she will eviscerate him financially. She must fuck like an epileptic weasel because she has no redeeming qualities whatsoever, her minge has been her lottery card.

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  20. I think this is absolutely hilarious.

    Two scumball scrotes are nicked, and one smug cunt is denied a jackpot.

    This one is for all the normal people, who have to queue behind cunts who clog up shops buying ‘lotties’ and scratchcards.

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  24. I bet the bugger handed them his card because he was too embarrassed to enter the newsagents himself in order to purchase a pack of gay sex contact magazines.

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