Now let me see… thermos of coffee, check. Cheese and ham sandwiches, check. Camping chair and blanket, check. Book…
Oh excuse me, didn’t see you there. Don’t mind me. I’m just having a final run through to make sure I’ve got everything before I leave the house. It’s for the all-night vigil outside the bookshop. I want to be the very first to get my hands on a copy of Omid Scobie’s new book ‘Endgame; Inside the Royal Family and the Monarchy’s Fight for Survival’.
I’m so excited that I’ll piss myself if I’m not careful; perhaps I should take a pair of incontinence pants along just to be on the safe side. Well it’s only natural to be excited, isn’t it? Apparently the book is what’s known as ‘a bombshell’. Mr Scabies’ no doubt meticulously researched tome will surely bring to light previously unheard facts and deep insights into the lives of the Royals, and will scupulously avoid any material which could be considered remotely contentious or sensationalistic.
If this new work even remotely compares in quality to the creepy-looking Mr Scoobie Doo’s previous megaseller ‘Finding Freedom’, I can confidentially see a Pulitzer Prize for an outstanding contribution to journalism landing in his lap. I’ll have absolutely no truck with those who accuse him of muck-racking for a fast buck, or putting the boot into the royals on behalf of his puppet-masters, the Duke and Duchess of Nutfux.
Well that’s me. Better get off so that I can get right at the front of the queue. The place is sure to be absolutely mobbed. Ta ta for now.
Nominated by Ron Knee, link by Minge Juice Bottler.
More from our Royal Reporter Ron Knee follows.
The Royal Racist
“Good afternoon. This is IsAC’s Royal correspondent Ron Knee speaking. Our followers will be aware that the publication of weirdo Omid Scobie’s new book ‘Endgame’ is again leading to speculation over the identity of the so-called ‘Royal Racist’. I’m joined by a senior member of the Royal Family, who wishes to remain anonymous, in order to set the record straight on what actually happened. Now, your…er…”
“Good afternoon. Please just refer to one as ‘X’, my good man”
“Well, your Xness, perhaps you’d care to give us your recollection of events”
“Certainly. One recalls that members of the family were taking afternoon tea in the drawing room shortly after the announcement that Meghan was (as dear Philip might have put it) ‘up the duff’. Naturally conversation turned to the er, physical features that might appertain where the child was concerned, that jolly old sort of thing, you know; all quite harmless”
“I see. Please elaborate”
“Mmm… someone raised the question of whether the child might be a ginger after its dear papa, and if a male offspring, whether he might fail prey to premature balding in later life. At that point, one ventured to wonder (quite innocently, I must emphasise) whether or not there might be a touch of the tarbrush there”
“Goodness. What happened next?”
“Well, one was immediately made aware that one might have put one’s foot in it. Her Majesty (who had graced us with her presence) pulled a face as though a malodorous guff had just been let orf under her nose, and huffed that ‘one simply didn’t make that sort of remark nowadays’. One was instantly mortified”.
“Oh dear, what an awkward moment. What happened next?”
“As you say, an awkward moment indeed. One is afraid to say that a deafening silence ensued, until a certain personage, who one shall refrain from naming, attempted to change the subject by making a speculation on Aston Villa’s prospects in something called ‘the transfer market’, one believes it was”
“How extraordinary. Did the atmosphere then return to normal?”
“Well, luck then favoured one with a most opportune distraction. One of HM’s corgis chose that moment to drop an enormous whoopsy on the carpet, necessitating the summoning of a lacky to remove the offending item. One was able to withdraw hastily to one’s private apartments for the rest of the afternoon”
“Naturally I’m sure that IsAC’s many followers will conclude that such speculation was merely the sort of thing that any family would engage in when faced with an addition to the family. All innocent and completely harmless”
“Indeed, all completely innocent and harmless, and that Scobie creature has no right to suggest otherwise. Storm in a teacup and that sort of rot. Fellow’s obviously a wrong ‘un…”
“Thank you Your Xness, for taking the time to set the record straight. This is Ron Knee, for IsAC, returning you to the studio”
One final dose on this nobody from Norman below.
Omid Scobie (and Harry and Megain) are colossal cunts.
Scobie, the chief Markle arselicker, has claimed there has been an ‘error’ in the Dutch edition of his royal sleazefest ‘Endgame’.
This ‘error’ apparently names the senior royals who were so ‘racist’ to the G-List Trailer Trash Opportunist. Of course, we still only have Megain’s word that this even actually happened, and I believe her and Hewitt’s word about as much as I believe in Father fucking Christmas. But an error and not meant? My arse. This whole thing has been arranged by those two self serving devious bastards and their author acolyte. They will now cash in on this ‘revelatory error’ just like they cash in on everything and everybody else. Only, the fuckers will deny they let the cat out of the bag and blame Scobie or the Dutch publishers. Milking it for all it’s worth, still slandering people, while trying to appear blameless and playing the victim. That is Megain and her pet Orangutan all over. Cunt, all three of them.
The Endgame started and finished with the brilliant Samuel Beckett.
Dimo Scobie Breasley can fuck right off
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P S I don’t use silly words similar to the twats anagram first name.
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“Do you believe in the life to come? Mine was always that.”
― Samuel Beckett, Endgame
Ponder on that Scobie you megacunt.
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Such a handsome boy of immense talent, says his Mother.
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As well as being a money-grubbing little shit and the Cunt and Cuntess of Nutfux’s arse-wiper, Scabrous has the distinction of being a right weird looking cove.
His face looks like a wax death mask, with a couple of hairy caterpillars stuck on as eyebrows. The wife, who knows more about these things than me, insists that he’s had a curl and dye job. Any botox, do you reckon?
What a ham shanker.
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Omid looks like Frankenstein got hold of Yuri Geller’s face, marinated in formaldehyde for a month then caked it in wax.
Weirdest visage I’ve ever seen.
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I have the feeling that it’s a face that won’t age gracefully
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He’d have more character in his boat race if they added more scar tissue. At least it would make us laugh.
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‘Now let me see… thermos of coffee, check. Cheese and ham sandwiches, check. Camping chair and blanket, check..’
I thought you were quoting Dwayne Dibley there, Ron.
I thought it all had to be pulped because of a ‘mis-translation’?
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Apparently so CP, but perhaps some purchases were made in Holland before the recall.
They’ll soon be going for an arm and a leg on EBay as collectors’ items I’m sure.
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I predict that, in the near future, the Bitch and her poodle will turn on Scobie, or vice versa.
The ensuing bloodbath will be a delight to behold.
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An interesting point JP, leading to much speculation that by not denouncing Scabies’ book, Hairpiece and Migraine are effectively endorsing it. It’s impossible to know just what, if any, input those two grifters might have made into this tome, but there appear to be signs that they’re trying to distance themselves a bit, given the level of radioactive fallout it’s produced.
Whatever the facts of the situation, it would be great if H and M did indeed turn on the cunt. The entertainment value, already enormous, would rocket into the stratosphere.
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From mogsrus.com today:
Omid Scooby-Do’s book endgame was released on Tuesday 28th November. Already, a week later, it has managed to cling on to 139th place in Amazon’s most purchased. And probably, by the time you read this, dropped out of the first 200. Which proves that there ARE a lot of sensible people out there. The Beano Annual is doing quite well as always!
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Indeed.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12822849/omid-scobie-endgame-book-drops-amazon-100-list.html
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Anyone would wonder what was coming out in a mixed relationship. It’s a shame that the King has been badly misquoted in this case.
HRH: “Harry, is it possible the child will be erm you know erm blek?”
Harry: “It’s possible papa….”
HRH: “At least it won’t be fucking ginger!”
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Well I hope Charlie and Willie take this utter cunt to the fucking cleaners in a court of law leaving him with nothing, not even a pot to piss in.
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Chances are that they won’t tho CP, if past indications are anything to go by.
More’s the pity.
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Best they simply ignore the cunt.
Shouldn’t dignify his rubbish with a reaction.
Would only be playing into MeGain & Halfwit’s hands.
Scobie is a nobody.
His book is not even in Amazon’s top 150.
Despite being on sale at half price.
Now removed from Waterstones shop window.
Fuck them.
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No the soft cunt jug ears should have stripped them of everything when they fucked off to yank land , but he’s a bottler only bothered about WEF crap and 1000 count sheets.
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You’ll probably realise l don’t read anything about and what’s written by the likes of these nonentities. You’ve only to look at the expressionless face to know what I’m talking about.
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jinkys!!!
scooby looks a right little ball tamperer!
like peewee Herman.
Look you little helmet fondler stop calling our Germans racists.
No one believes glamorous skellington Kate said anything,
or that drip Charles.
“the kids a n*gger”
said nobody.
” what the fucks that?!
diddy King?’
said nobody.
stop making up lies.
you little y front astronaut.
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OMID SCABIES
An intense irritation caused by a microscopic parasitic mite.
Eradicate with a powerful insecticide.
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this freak has a face I would like to shot blast.
apart from that he is a total cunt.
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He pouts well, if the pic up top’s anything to go by
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Who’s this cunt?
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Here is my take on that story..
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sorry I spotted a beer in the fridge.
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Agreed, Barry.
I don’t give a shit about the royals. The fixation on ’em is weird.
Still, as a libertarian, let ’em have at it. There’s beer in the fridge.
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Thunderbirds Are Go – as new Thunderbirds puppet Omid joins Virgil, Brains and Mr Tracey and the gang. Only the Thunderbirds puppets look more realistic than Omid.
Would you believe Omid is 42. He looks about 12.
His book is a pile of shite. Despite denials, it has the fingerprints of Meagain and Spare all over it. And neither do I believe the bull about the error in the Dutch translation, which the translator vehemently denies. This was engineered by Omid, Meagain and Spare to get the names out. But who cares – it’s quite normal to wonder about a child’s skin colour in a mixed race marriage and not racist at all.
No doubt Endgame will be another bonanza for remaindered book sellers – just like The Bench and Spare.
Cunts.
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I feel sorry for any poor sod who opens a present on Xmas morning to find that it’s a copy of ‘Endgame’ that some cunt was sure they’d love…
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Only to be regifted and unopened in January for some poor cunt’s birthday.
3
Well I read that the book was written by AI as Omid was too busy being bummed by a royal corgi.
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oh and while the topic is big piles of shit,here’s another one..
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-67637439
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Sue Braverman has just made her resignation speech and one thing she said ‘we need fucking concentration camps to lock these cunts up before deporting the bastards’, well something like that, but close enough.
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The question they should have been asking is will the kid turn out a ginger DNA dodging sulky self-absorbed grifting manchild crybully like his father.
And Meghan Markle is barely fucking black herself.
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Markle is neither black or beautiful.
Here’s someone who’s both, and who’s most definitely NOT a cunt like Markle to boot;
https://estherkrakue.com/
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Black and beautiful?
Shirl, of course…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NluSpI1Rs2k
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Shirl was top totty in her day
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I have it good authority (fuck knows who talked to scooby doo) Charlie said ‘it’s bad enough he married a soot but the last thing we need is an off white sprog’, and Kate added ‘it doesn’t matter what shade it is, with MeAgain as a mother it’s bound to have its head up its arse and demand to be recognised as ‘black’ even if it’s a pale ginger cunt like daddy’
All true but people’s recollections may vary
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This has a real ring of authenticity about it Sick. I bet that Kate’s a proper little cat behind the scenes.
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Yes Ron, my sources are impeccable and clearly not a figment of my imagination.
Kate may come across as a sweetheart in public but I am sure she can dish it out in private 😉
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Whatever stick Megain gets, she deserves.
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Come on Sick, you can tell us. Have you got a source at Buck House?
2
Megain is the sort of cunt who would see offence in someone saying ‘Nice day, isn’t it?’ And, of course, we know about how she claims somebody looked at her in a ‘racist’ manner.. How the fuck did she know or assume that? Is she a mind reader?
Nah, she’s just a poisonous little slag who would start a fight in an empty house. Cheap as shit, twice as dirty, and three times as nasty.
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Is that a Sue Perkins action figure?
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Blimey you’re right, esp. when you see pics of the twat with glasses on.
Have they ever been seen together in the same room?
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😆😆👍 hehehe
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He looks like a plasticine model of the the fucking Mekon, crafted by a four year old mong. I can just hear the teacher saying ‘What a wonderful model Mordred, what is it supposed to be?’
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PS God save the King.
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Strangely odd looking fecker.
I’ve seen this thing, it inhabits the web pages of the Waily Fail and appears to be linked to Harry Windsor-Hewitt and his Gold digger.
Apart from that I’m none the wiser and couldn’t care less tbh.
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“Gold digger”…is that rhyming slang?
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Omid’s face freaks the fuck out of me, all I see is Michael Jackson…
Shamone, motherfucker!
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yeah
I’m thinking he’s a hybrid mix of Uri Geller and Peewee Herman.
probably some fucked up experiment in the search for eternal life.
His mush is full of Botox which doesn’t help.
it might smooth out wrinkles but it gives the impression you’ve been stunned by a heavy blow.
scooby don’t.
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Although the royals are unlikely to sue, I do see an abrupt and messy end in site for Scooby.
I would suggest he check the brakes on his car twice before pulling out onto the freeway.
Well, at least I would suggest that if I could give a dead rat’s cock whether he lives or dies.
3
I’m sure Phil the Greek passed on his ‘contacts list’ to Charles should he want any mess clearing up that would embarrass the Royal family. Prince Andrew should keep his head down too then.
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OT. I was wondering when these cunts would pop up again.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-merseyside-67634856
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Ha, cheers norm, I posted a little off topic ditty on the PVA’s earlier. Makes my piss boil. To say nothing of the costs of 6 more years of bullshite……
2
A road in Manchester is being transformed into a catwalk for one of the fashion world’s most prestigious events, with a host of A-list stars expected to attend. In other words, a total cuntfest, full of loads of steaming cunts.
Thomas Street, I believe, Where are the IRA or those peacefuls when needed?
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I don’t want my daughter hooking up with a dar-key I can tell you that.
Does that make me racist?
I believe it does.
Fuck off.
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‘Does that make me racist’ ?
Not all, just a normal upstanding member of the community, with a sensible approach and outlook.
Wear it as a badge of honour. 👍
3
Of topic, the PVA (professional victims association) Liverpool scouse branch – are moaning again about Hillsboro and the 96.
HMG have apparently reneged on a deal to introduce legislation that compels witnesses in an enquiry to tell the truth, or some such. I got bored listening to the scouse droning on on that victims accent so lost the thread….
Cos eets all about the victims… Christ on a bike can they not leave them to rest in peace FFS.
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Plastic spastic. Fuck him.
4
Like we need something else to add to the clusterfuck that is the life of the Markles.
There are reports here in the states that the real life Thunderbird puppet is living la vida loca in a Beverley Hills Hotel reveling in all the attention his new book has garnished. A lot like an old girlfriend of mine who would fuck something up and cause a scene thereby becoming the center of attention his philosophy seems to be any attention is good attention.
He of course has denied that he ever wrote the names of the 2 “racists” in his book. His editor/agent (?) however, has now said that he did and it was in an early manuscript copy and that’s what was sent to the Dutch publisher.
There are also questions arising as to where he got the 2 names from. He of course won’t say and the Markles deny that they have ever cooperated with the slimy little turd.
For her part, Rachel is said to be furious over her portrayal in the book and there is speculation that the non-existent relationship between her and Scooby Doo will soon come to an end.
One interesting note is a piece of trivia that has emerged from all of this. It has come to light that when Mrs Markle-Hewitt introduces herself to someone or calls them on the phone she refers to herself as Meghan, Duchess of Sussex.
This is really old news as it has been revealed that back in 2021 when some piece of legislation that interested her was coming up for a vote in the Senate she called 2 US Senators, Susan Collins and Shelly Moore Caputo.
“Hello Senator, this is Meghan, Duchess of Sussex.”
Fucking delusional, narcissistic cunt!
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I bet that the delusional self-aggrandising cow couldn’t point to Sussex on a map.
What a fucking piece of work.
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