Wimminz Football Experts

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Not exactly a new theme this one, but I refer cunters to the issue of wimminz and football once again.

Consider Alyson Rudd, former player with Leyton Orient Ladies, qualified coach, referee and football journalist. So Alyson must be about as knowledgeable as it’s possible to be about the beautiful game..

Writing a preview of the forthcoming Sheffield United v Newcastle United Premiership match on 24th September, Alyson gave us this insightful gem:

‘Heckingbottom’s side ought to be able to trouble and annoy Newcastle United in today’s match at Bramall Lane.’

Furthermore:

‘…he is blessed to have hard-working players capable of decent levels of defensive organisation to prevent leaking too many goals.’

The game ended Sheffield United 0 Newcastle United 8.

Hey Alyson, stick to your knitting pet.

The Times

Nominated by: Geordie Twatt 

56 thoughts on “Wimminz Football Experts”

  1. No one ever asked for their input, but we’re stuck with them.

    Wimminz pundits are bad enough, but the commentators are far worse.

    When the action gets exciting, their screeching is so high pitched it sets the dogs off in the next street.

    I used to pay for the footy on Sky/BT when the focus was on football instead of woke causes, thick cunt blacks with no character and chippy, entitled wimminz.

    They can get fucked. Not a fucking penny from me anymore, you twats.

  3. And the cunts at Arsenal v Chelsea just now, kneeling for Floyd and a minute’s silence for the Pally cunts (well for both sides, but didn’t do the same for Russian citizens, did they?).

    Bobby Charlton has just died, but fuck that eh?

    Mind you, there are too many shows of virtue signaling (2 just now) before games as it is. Should only be a minute’s silence for Remembrance Sunday, the death of a monarch or if a club legend dies (not some random fan or Doris the tea lady’s budgie).

    • I had to give out a derisory laugh earlier when I read….
      “ The team will wear black armbands tonight in their Premier League fixture at Sheffield United and the pre-planned minute’s silence will be expanded to pay respects to Sir Bobby”
      So one of the greatest Man Utd and national sporting legends of all time has to share his minutes silence with whom exactly?
      Has the tea lady’s budgie died?
      Ffs!

      • Aye, they’ve tied themselves in knots to the point that Bobby Charlton has to share his minute’s silence with dead Hamas cunts.

        Well done, you fucking clowns!

      • I recall when ‘tributes’ were made to Nobby Stiles and Tommy Docherty when they died.

        Both had to ‘share’ with Chicken Floyd George, as the players took the knee on the Old Trafford pitch. Crawling woke bastards.

      • Just saw it.

        It seemed that while the stadium announcer was banging on about ‘those affected by the conflict’ the fans were chanting Bobby Charlton’s name and applauding so you couldn’t hear him.

    • They should replace the Cenotaph with a gigantic bust of George Floyd and be done with it.

      Let’s face it – the ugly, drug addled, criminal cunt, gets more respect from da yoof and the hard of thinking than the war dead do.

      Rio Ferdinand could place a big wreath made entirely out of wraps of coke and fentanyl tablets every weekend as part of his remembrance.

      I shouldn’t joke about it really because under Labour and Dame Kier, there’s every chance it’ll happen.

  4. Speaking as a girlie, GT, your nom, and I quote: “Wimminz Football Experts” is a contradiction in terms. Perhaps you could have gone for “Women … Football Punditry, Kittens & Soft Fluffy Things – Oh, And The Menopause as well”.

    • Point taken, SB, and a very pretty girlie you are too, if I might be so bold.
      Mrs Twatt (who is also a girlie) once expressed some interest in football, so I gave her the task of making me a seat warmer to cushion the haemorrhoids whilst I watch The Toon. She did rather spoil it though by embroidering it with pink bunnies.

      Anyway, that’s two noms of mine today. Admin aren’t half scraping the bottom of the barrel.

      • I think they may be about to unleash Armageddon!

        I’m hiding behind the sofa, Geordie.

  5. wimminz football?

    Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha…

    (breathe.)

    Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

    Seriously, it’s like watching a couple of homeless jam spoons fighting over a week old piece of KFC.

    Nobody gives a fuck and quite frankly it’s not worth our time.

  8. It does annoy me when I repeatedly see things on here that are never going to change. This in particular complaint on women’s lack of knowledge about football. Its a difficult one due to nobody being able to predict what’s going to happen, besides I’m getting bored with the same things being mentioned by either sex and commentaries have died a death with the same superlatives being mentioned. I was lucky that I’d stopped listening to punditry and commentary years ago. Now I just watch games with less enthusiasm l once had, in silence and sometimes listen to something else at the same time.

    • Football punditry is what the mute button was invented for Sammy.
      And like you, I often listen to something else during a match, usually myself snoring.

  9. The recently departed Sir Bobby Charlton would have been too much of a gentleman to pass comment on this nom.
    Fortunately, I’m nothing like a gentleman, so here goes.
    Fuck off and comment on your own game, you shrieking, useless fucking cunts!

  10. I do wonder if some of these retired football wimminz actually knew who Sir Bobby Charlton was?

    And even if they did you would get some uppity cunt saying “Yeah, but so and so played 560 million games for the England team and she won a shiny badge in her long 3 year career. Surely she is equally as deserving of a knighthood as that Charlton… whatshisname Bobby bloke?”

  11. Tarts commentate and pundit on tarts ‘football’

    Blokes commentate and pundit on real football

    Seems fair to me 👍

    • Its a mere resemblance of something passionate that was once played by men on muddy pitches, kicking fuck out of each other.

  13. World Cup Final ’78 panel.

    Host: Brian Moore
    Pundits: Johan Cruyff, Kevin Keegan and Brian Clough.

    Nuff said.

    Now?

    Host: Some thick, Alan Partridge-esque split arse I’ve never heard of. Usually black or brown. And thick.

    Pundits: Annoying white split arse, another annoying split arse who needs to be black. Usually clueless and always banging on about wimminz/black ishoos instead of the fucking game and a bloke ex player of no major note, Dion Dublin, Clinton Morrison, Jermaine Jenas – some cunt like that.

    This is progress, apparently.

    Get to fuck.

  14. I don’t watch football as a rule, but if a UK team has made it to the final of some important competition, I will flick the TV on, and I have to agree.

    Ladies, stick to Wimbledon (tennis), or crown green bowling, sheepdog trials maybe.

    I don’t watch any of those.

  15. Not a big fan of the telly football bollocks, but squawking women trying to go over the “finer” points leaves me completely disinterested.

    Therefore the off button is deployed…

  16. She probably knows more than the Sheffield Imploded Manager and Players. Who do they think they are losing like that, Manchester United?

  18. As you know, I loathe all women in football. But almost all wimmin on telly are cunts.

    This morning, that Nadiya cunt who was given – sorry – won that BBC Bake Off thing was hilarious.

    She now has her own show and is supposed to be a top cookery expert.
    .But today she made a curry with – .wait for it – curry powder. Fucking curry powder. For fuck’s sake…

  19. Have the wimminz heard of Sir Bobby? If so what are their views? We need to know…Do we fuck.

    • Like me, my missus has zero interest in football, but has certainly heard of Sir Bobby.
      I wonder, did he realise when accepting his knighthood, that a knighthood is the de facto mark of a cunt?
      Probably not.
      Footballers are not renowned for their intelligence.

      • I think it suits some of them. Sir Stanley Matthews, Sir Tom Finney, Sir Matt Busby and Sir Bobby Charlton.

        Of course Shankly and Clough should have got one and all.

  20. These broadcasting geniuses must see the collation between the fall in viewing figures and subscriptions and the rise in screeching harridans..

    Fingers crossed its a all male commentary team for the rugby..

  21. That split arse on the right has a nice pair on her. Not that I’m a disgraceful p er vert who zoomed in for a good look or anything.

  22. Why don’t the BBC make the female pundits appear naked? At the most stockings and suspenders. The Lineker object can be hung by his bollocks to cheer us up. How’s about that then?

  23. I bet you wouldn’t complain if the women prattled on about fuck all and did a striptease at the the same time, in a sexy voice using innuendos, like “he slammed it home” and “dribbled down the side of the tunnel at the end”.

  24. To see Alex Scott, Karen bastard Carney and Squeaky Oatley making out they know about Sir Bobby and his heroics would make me sick.

    I can hear Scott now.

    ‘Well yeah, Bobby woz great innit. Such a legend innit. Him and errr Fingy, Denis Roussos and err the other one. Jack Best. E wuz Welsh wonnee?’

  25. If only Alan Ball was still alive, he could join them. What ! The blind wouldn’t notice.

  26. England in the process of boring the Springboks to death in the rugby semi final.

    If the 1988 Wimbledon ‘Crazy Gang’ was a rugby team then England would surely be it.

      • Indeed Norman.

        How could I forget George Graham and his notorious Arsenal side.

        I reckon the changes to the back pass rule and the evolution of the offside rules were enough to eventually render Gorgeous George as an obsolete dinosaur.

        His teams were effective but fuck me – they were enough to put a glass eye to sleep.

        The League Cup and FA Cup Finals in 93 against Wednesday were particularly bad.

      • I think a video came out back then, Herman. ‘Arsenal – 100 Great 0-0 Draws.’

        Graham managed like he played. As a player at Manchester United he was a cure for insomnia. Because it was printed in the papers so much, we thought his name was ‘Below Par Graham’.

        I also remember being at Old Trafford when those two cunts Winterburn and Limpar started a 21 man brawl.

    • 6:00 Trevor Francis (RIP) almost gets knocked out by a bus door springing open in his face.

  28. I reckon you could make a few bob if you made an internet radio station called ‘Audiosync’ or summat.

    So the woke don’t come for you (you need sponsors), offer a choice of male only or female only commentary for sporting events (footy, cricket and rugby especially). Make sure it syncs perfectly with Sky/BT/Amazon/BBC/ITV/Channel 4 and you’d make a killing.

    And yes, every cunt would choose the male only commentary/co commentary.

    I know I’d fucking use something like that.

    You could even have male only pundits on YouTube for pre match, half time and full time.

    Make a killing I reckon.

  29. The thing with these tarts is they have no sense of humour and they cannot be questioned or disagreed with in any way.

    For the 1970 World Cup, Malcolm Allison, Derek Dougan, Pat Crerand and Bob McNab had some proper arguments on ITV. Sometimes fierce ones. But they also had a laugh and there were no grudges.

    Fast forward to Sky Sports, and Graeme Souness makes a passing remark about ‘a man’s game’ and it’s a mass wimmims chimp out. That Carney bitch being the most guilty. If anybody – especially a bloke – says they aren’t into wimmin pundits, it’s viewed as a hate crime. Fucking staggering shit. Banter has always been part of the game. But these narcissistic po faced bints neither want it or understand it. That is just one of hthe reasons they have no place in televised football. Women on TV football has never worked and it never will.

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