MPs Not Killing Themselves

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A woe is me cunting for these burnt out politicians who are feeling the strain of fucking this country so far up it would be impossible to fix it without recourse to an armed struggle.

Lets take a look shall we at their working conditions shall we? Just under £85,000 pounds a year, risible expenses claims, hiring family members on a bloody good annual salary. Subsidised food and drink. Need II go on?

The only sad thing is not one of these cunts has thrown a double six and topped themselves. Fucking useless bastards.

Daily Fail Link.

Nominated by : CuntyMort

(From a legal note: we wouldn’t wish suicide on any of our democratically elected representatives. – Day Admin)

79 thoughts on “MPs Not Killing Themselves”

  1. MPs need to understand that the only reason they are in the HoP is because at election time, they were the least worst option.

    Some of the decisions being made by that bunch of utter cunts leads me to believe that 95% are in the final stages of syphilis.

    • Correct Odin.
      I can’t remember the last time I voted when it wasn’t against someone, instead of for someone.
      We need to have a box with ‘None Of The Above’ to put an X in.
      That way, if NOTA wins, they’ll keep having to put in new candidates until we have a genuine winner, regardless of party or policies.
      I’m voting Reform, (if they field a candidate).

  2. Boo hoo, Rory the fucking chimp. Rory, Rory tell us a story.

    Rory, compare your situation to the Doctors and Junior Doctors your government is currently arse-fucking. Suicides aplenty amongst medics due to the intolerable pressure that your government has created – it just doesn’t make the news.

    Precious little simian cunt. Fuck right off.

    • That must be the most brain dead post of the week.

      Bravo Sir, please collect a peanut as your prize.

      Go suck a gorilla’s fat cock.

    • I see the train drivers are on strike again at the end of the week. Poor loves. No shoes, just a crust of mouldy bread to eat. I feel sorry for them.

    • Fuck me, three posts under yours, deleted, Paul. It seems the moderators from ‘The Guardian’ have been hired… RIP Ruff Tuff, Dick Fiddler, Gutstick etc.

      Site seems to sponsored by ‘Bacofoil’.

      • Hi DCI – good to see you again!

        Yes, Harry did seem to rattle off a narky response before thinking about it. I responded in kind. Nothing personal, I’m sure Harry is a game guy and can handle a bit of rough and tumble.

        Please stick around Gene, the site isn’t the same without you.

      • ‘Evening, Paul. Kind words, but, I’m afraid, in my humble opinion, the amount of conspiracy theory shite from home and abroad, the loss of some decent posters, the censorship and the ‘Mr Grimsdale’ feature has made the site go downhill. I still look in from time to time and still chuckle at Thomas’ perverted observations, MNC’s, Jack’s, arfur, yours and the other old stalwarts views on life.

        Just not so much.

  3. I have that useless du cockwomble Drakeford on deadpool, works for me, I’m sure if he doesn’t do it himself someone is going to give him a hand the way things are looking in good ol Wales at the moment.

    • As a gesture to goodwill and peace, I would like to hand over Anthony Blair to the Taliban for a full and fair trial. Of course, if capital punishment is the sentence, I have no grounds for requesting a reprieve from either His Majesty or the Ayatollah.. Pass me the black wig, and is there a Chaplain in the house? Afterwards the fragrant Cherie can throw herself on the pyre as a mark of respect too.

  5. Forgetfulness and clumsiness of leaving matches and ropes lying around, will have to suffice I’m afraid. We don’t want to upset anybody.

  6. It takes some doing to get every single decision wrong and endlessly vote for the most nationally damaging policy option available. There is a definite trick to it. It must be revealed to them on their first visit to ‘The House’, The message might be written on rice paper so that they can eat it as soon as they have read it. Either that, or the public unerringly chooses lazy, ignorant, perverted bastards whenever they enter the voting booths. Fuck off.

    Good morning, everyone.

  7. It takes some doing to get every single decision wrong and endlessly vote for the most nationally damaging policy option available. There is a definite trick to it. It must be revealed to them on their first visit to ‘The House’, The message might be written on rice paper so that they can eat it as soon as they have read it. Either that, or the public unerringly chooses lazy, ignorant, purvertid bastards whenever they enter the voting booths. Fuck off.

    Good morning, everyone.

    • Besides putting the voters in neon lights, how do the cunts they voted for, get where they are in the first place ?

      • Morning, Sammy. The ‘party machines’ attract the vilest materials for shaping into candidates. Only absurdly revolting sociopaths need apply. At least that is how the Lib Dems do it!

  10. Put them all to sleep.

    Including those in the House of Frauds.

    Oh sorry, most of those are asleep already.

    The smelly piss soaked parasites.

    Get To Fuck.

    • The company I work for had an invitation for lunch at the HoL recently.

      I wouldn’t attend our of principle, but I am reliably informed that the senile old duffers they wheeled out to have lunch with the staff were so far gone they either fell asleep at the table or didn’t understand where they were or what they were meant to be doing and got lost in the dining hall.

      Bit worrying considering they have a say in the running of the country.

      • Just replace them with tramps.

        Nobody would notice.

        While we’re at it, you could do the same with university humanities departments, NHS management, Local councils etc.
        No actual effect on quality of service, but the money saved would be tens of billions.

  11. They should all be issued with fishnet stockings and an orange when the first enter The House…

  12. May the fekkers wail and gnash their teeth in anguish, let their bowels fall from their arses and the hairs on their scrotal sack be made of wire. I find the respiration that supports their existence an abomination and a waste of oxygen.

    I am no fan of politicians ! Let the cunts swing.

  13. Fuck em.

    Their cosy bubble will get well and truly burst at some stage,not too far off the rate they are pushing us to ruin.

    It will be a fine day when those houses are cleared.

    The appalling cunts.

  14. Selection of prospective candidates for all parties should be made by a white racist homophobe of neo nazi persuasion.

  15. What a load of old wank – the reason these cunts feel this way of unsustainable pressure is becuase most have two (or more) jobs.

    Do I feel sorry for them, do I fuck. It’s like when those fat train driving cunts, on over £70K a year get into a job, knowing what the conditions are like and then feel it’s their right to moan and strike, if you don’t like it – fuck off.

    I have never heard of a poor MP, so each one that moans can lick my salty ball sack.

    I see a new term has crept into out delightful language “eco-anxiety”, read on my fellow cunt fucks…

    Good moaning!

    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-66923590

  16. Unfortunately, the most honourable and decent resident of Downing Street ( Larry the cat ), is seriously ill. 🐱

    There’s no justice.

    Good morning.

  17. I’m not surprised that some of them have almost killed themselves. They’re equally inept at making a proper job of running the country except that they don’t ‘almost’ make a good job of it, they come nowhere near. If there’s a lesson to be learned from this it would be that making inflated expenses claims is not good training for hara-kiri.

  18. Mp’s salary as of 2023 is £86,584.
    From that, they have all the usual expenses presumably, expensive mortgage, etc.
    Yet they’re all millionaires, especially the cabinet.
    They can’t all have married billionaire bud bud ding dings, so all their money surely comes from payoffs from corporations, banks, lobby groups and other shady interests.
    Not just our useless cunt MP’s of course, there’s doubtless not a single honest, non-corrupt politician in the entire world.
    I hate them even more than I hate pædophiles.

  19. If an MP does fancy the suicide route (which would obviously break my fucking heart), then the way our chosen by Stephen Milligan in 1994 seems the way to go.
    This from Wiki….

    Milligan was found dead in his house at 64 Black Lion Lane, Hammersmith, London, by his secretary Vera Taggart on 7 February 1994. Milligan had failed to appear in the House of Commons as expected, and so Taggart went to look for him.[4] Milligan’s corpse was found naked except for a pair of stockings and suspenders, with an electrical flex tied around his neck, his head covered and an orange in his mouth.

    How’s about that!
    What a way to go, and with the added bonus of bringing shame on their families too.
    I commend this topping to the house.

  20. Of course I live in the states but I can still relate to the nomination and proclaim it righteous.

    However, I cannot relate to Day Admin’s Legal disclaimer. Does he really think some of the IsaC Faithful would wish suicide on on their duly elected leaders?

    By the way…when is Guy Fawkes Day? (Asking as a Yank.)

    • I also don’t see any legal issue in the first place. “Kill him/her!” could be seen as incitement but “I wish the cunt would blow out whatever passes for his/her brains!” is a simple declaration.

      • I also thought the same. But I guess we’re living in such litigious/cancel culture times I guess they’re just covering themselves.

    • Sadly General the fine tradition of Bonfire Night is long past its sell by date..most kids are shit scared of fires now and are too lazy to go scavenging for wood.

      Most of the big organised events have disappeared citing needing insurance etc…been all downhill since the 70s alas.

  21. What else would you expect, the place is full of bum bandits, pussies and lard arse women.
    Be hard to find a pair of bollocks in the place.

    Multiculturalism isn’t working, fucking hell, Suella has seen the light that the rest of the country has seen for decades.

    • Braverman has copped a lot of stick for stating the obvious about multiculturalism especially from the rag which is the Daily Mirror . I would say two words to her critics- Lee Rigby followed by two more ‘Fuck Off !’.

      • Add Batley Grammar and the ‘scuffed’ Koran incident, not to mention the film made by one bunch of muzzies effectively banned by another bunch of muzzies.
        The cunts can’t get on with each other so what chance of getting along with white culture

  22. Suicide? A dose of bleach usually works on parasites.

    Cunts

    Flush them away with the rest of the shit!

  23. It’s alright Rory, we know none of you have a fucking clue what is going on. You just take the money and rubber stamp whatever woke or authoritarian bill is passed under your nose.

    I’m also not too shocked that some MPs have felt suicidal, given how the civil service and media hound them whenever they try to go against the woke establishment. Any attempt to stem immigration or reform the NHS or education blob gets activists of twitter squealing, the media bleating and civil service stamping its feet.

    What did Parliament do after Brexit for 3 and a half years? Became a creche full of stroppy kids, failing to do the job it is paid to do.
    Maybe because it is full of lawyers?
    Maybe because it is full of women? Maybe most of them saw themselves getting their snouts in the EU trough, or had chums there?

    I’m glad it happened though, as it revealed the contempt the liberal media-political class has for the ordinary working man. It was always there, behind Blair, Cameron and Clegg’s false smiles, and now they’re taking revenge.

    We need elected representatives, but they shoukd at least try to represent their constituents and we don’t need 3 parties who all want the same thing: A bankrupt woke shithole full of ghettoes, stabbing and rape.

  24. Why o why did cunt Blair not feel suicidal and act on it before he put into place his plans to destroy Blighty,perhaps he would like to reconsider as I have plenty of rope .

  25. MPs ‘tried to kill themselves’ due to the ‘pressures’ of the job? Funny that none of them actually suceeded then.

    Oh fuck off, you ugly cunt. If they can’t do the job, then get another (but that would mean getting off the gravy train).

    I suggest that you try a few 12 hr shifts in A and E mate. Maybe getting your arse shot at in Afghanistan was a joy ride as well compared to being an MP, with all the hardships that entails.

    Cunt.

    Morning all.

  26. A couple of well aimed hand grenades when every one of these cunts are all in one place at the same time would be preferable than one or two suicides.

  27. The Donald isn’t perfect by any stretch but he gets what makes ordinary working people tick. A decent wage, a decent job, actual Dollars in their pocket to get the economy moving. Putting his country first. Our career MP’s are so out of touch with reality. The majority never having to scrimp and save, in it for themselves, very, very rarely giving a shit about UK citizens, instead looking after the dregs of society from other countries. They actually encourage the apathy in this country as it gives them an easy ride. I’ve no problem having MP’s, it’s about time we had a broader range of society in these positions.

  28. What is unfortunate is that most newly appointed MPs, who have thoughts of changing the world for the better based on what their constituents are saying, is soon forgotten about once they have been absorbed into the government culture of towing the line!

    I’m a big fan of the old 70s TV sitcom “Yes, Minister”. Jim Hacker, the newly appointed MP spends his first few days as Minister full of optimism and determination to do the right thing; but is soon thwarted by his own civil servants and party Chief Whips.

    Abandon all hope of doing what is best for the people who voted you into power; just follow the party line on things that the people will totally hate instead.

  29. Rory Stewart, hey? I have a confession. Used to allow the cunt a bit of respect because he’d been in the military (and played this for all it was worth.) I have now to cunt myself.

    This nom made me look him up: five months of a Short Service Commission – which would normally have lasted 3 years at least – in the provisional rank of bottom rupert or 2nd Lt: In his gap year, before going on to do …guess what? studying* PPE at Oxford. All the indicators are that his path to prominence was heavily greased – effortless entry to all areas of influence without the doormen ever questioning him.

    I would not for a moment encourage MP’s to top themselves. I would enjoy their suffering, if they suffered. Perhaps spending their waking hours weeping paroxysmally with remorse for what they have done to this country, and their nights locked into terrifying nightmares involving disembowelment. I’d want a ringside seat and popcorn. But Stewart? The Taliban missed a choice target there.

    *Wikipedia is silent as to whether he actually got the degree…

    • “Perhaps spending their waking hours weeping paroxysmally with remorse for what they have done to this country, and their nights locked into terrifying nightmares involving disembowelment.”

      I doubt it, old chap. Snorting cocaine off a whore’s rounded arse and swigging champagne is a bit of an escape from the humdrum of such trifles and a sure fire mood lifter. So I’ve heard.

      • My mistake. For “popcorn” please read “Snorting cocaine off a whore’s rounded arse and swigging champagne”. Always happy to learn from my, er, betters. But I did say, “if”.

      • Not surprised to learn that Stewart was hired by Jug Ears to tutor Prince Baldilocks and Halfwit.

      • Too many sociopaths and narcissists in the HoC.

        Remorse? No , the political-media class have never expressed genuine remorse in their lives.

        Matt Hancock was just sorry he got caught. People were mean to him. He was just doing his job.
        Same with Allegra Stratton and all the other cunts.

        Contrast what happened in care homes and Westminster during the pandemic.

        These people don’t give a fuck.

  30. Guy Fawkes needed to finish the job and blow up Parliament to kingdom come.All a bunch of backward traitorous shit weasels 😠.

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