Cunts with Private Number Plates

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I would like to nominate cunts who try and make their registration numbers look like words, was road testing a car earlier and came up behind some tool who had on the back of his Merc AMG DEAR instead of the correct AM60 EAR, the best bit is it was on an Eclass diesel, the only AMG thing about it was the eBay sticker on the boot.

At our garage we see this kind of fuckmuppery all the time, they wonder why they get harassed by plod and then i get questioned about how the car passed an mot with a dodgy number plate, its simple, these fuckers have the correct plate in the boot, to be used for mot,s, we have seen it all before, some steroid freak who had changers B16 GER to BIGGER and the list is endless, what cunts.

eBay Link

Nominated by Fuglyucker.

More on the subject and link above provided by Chuff Chugger.

I would like to second this nomination…….specifically about one type of bastardized number plate you see.

These are the ones with the word ‘BOSS’ (or their interpretation of the word boss, as you cannot actually make the word using legal letters) (See eBay link above – DA)

(actually, that’s also the type of car you see them on as well)

These are cheap plates, purchased by low rent wide boy business owners who want to show everyone they are a cunt.

Let’s face it, if you work for someone who has one of these plates, then you already know they are the boss, and if you don’t then why would you give a fuck knowing a random stranger is some sort of boss of a small local construction company, tarmacking business, nail bar or a corner shop, or some other money laundering operation.

All it really says is ‘I am insecure, and a cunt’.

74 thoughts on “Cunts with Private Number Plates”

    • I don’t understand why you would want one?

      A badly spelt name on your vehicle.
      DAR R3N.

      To me it says there’s a mitmot driving called fuckin Darren.
      Why does he want everyone to know his name?

      To be fair I’ve got my name in big lettering on the side of the van
      But that’s for Business advertising.

      I hope they can’t cut you out of the wreckage Darren.

      • Does having Miserable Northern Cunt in big letters on your van really get you coustom?

      • The best bit is anyone who ever gets cut up by one of these fuckers will never forget the number and as the number travels from car to car, even if you see whatever car it’s on in years to come parked down a dark lane, you have to go all Dirty Harry ans your self…. Do you feel lucky punk, well do ya!!.
        We used to have this absolute tool of a customer, who had his name on his 911, he was a cunt and I strongly suspect drove like a cunt, as in the seconded nom, he was a small time business owner making boxes or something.
        Anyway the aforementioned 911 used to attact key marks, whether it was down to driving like a cunt, being a cunt of a boss, or just being a cunt in general I can’t say.
        The moral of the story is, if your going to make people remember you and want revenge a private plate mean you can’t hide forever…..

  3. Mis has re-registered his owd white (school girl) pick-up as I AM COTY, not that he is trying to show off though

  4. Personalised plates are for cunts. I’ve known a handful of people who owned them, and those people are total cunts. One in particular was a frog-faced pot bellied arrogant gobcunt. The wanker regularly used to drink and drive too. Fucking soaked idiot. Nothing screams “I’m a cunt” more than seeing a twatpanzer with personalised plates. Normally the stereotypes are true. “I’m a loudmouthed insecure middle management cunt that has to hide my blue pills in the glovebox as my cock is about as hard as custard”. PI55 OFF U CVNT.

  7. Both my daughters have private plates.
    I thought they had more sense, but apparently they have more money than sense.
    I’m going to live until I’m 110, then leave the lot to the Gradly Lass.

    • Don’t know if if still applies Jeezum, but in 2000 when the mother-in-law died she left some money to our kids and we learned that because it skipped a generation there was no tax due. Be worth checking, good luck with that.

  8. They have too much money and think that by doing this, they’re somehow above the little people when really they just come across and bell-ends.I’d rather spend it on beer.
    Hoo-ee, what a bunch of cunts.

  9. There are a couple of right cunt plates that I’ve seen in Edinburgh. One was on a Merc, and the clearly SNP owner had taken YE55 COT, and turned it into (you guessed it) YES SCOT.

    Another owner was a twat driving around in an open top sportcar, who’d turned H15 EXY into HI SEXY. I know.

    One that I saw in Edinburgh was great tho. A bottle blonde lassy wearing a mini and high heels tottered out of a ‘Jimny’ in the carpark in Holyrood Park. The licence plate was B1MBO. Love it.

    Evening all.

      • I hate to correct you, but that’s her beard of a husband’s plate, that is…

        His beard of a wife’s reads: G0U DOU.

  10. I loathe the cunts that sport these plates.
    What they don’t realise, is that they don’t conform to road legal use, and can only be displyed on a vehicle that’s on private property.
    If, or more likely when, the cunt that has one of these plates (if you look like a cunt, you’re sure to act like one), they will find that their insurance is invalid, leaving them open to private as well as criminal prosecution.
    I fucking hate them, though I was once impressed by some bird driving a white Merc SLK convertable in M/Cr, with the plate ‘505 EXY’.

    • Like twats with tinted glass that’s too dark, the rozzers can rarely be bothered (also with cunting leccy scooters and twats cycling on the pavement).

  11. The absolute worst are the cunts that don’t actually have one of these plates, but take a bog standard one, and try to make it look personalised; eg

    AB12 CDE becomes AB 12 CDE.

    Pathetic.

    • Indeed. Looking at some of them trying to make out what the message is. And there isn’t one. Pointless.

  12. Last thing I want is a distinctive, memorable number plate. I remove all the badges from my cars anyway ever since I discovered that so many potential witnesses could not tell whether a vehicle was a Fiesta or a coach if it didn’t have signs to tell them.

    • …always a bonus when driving away from the scene of your latest murder/rape/mugging/race hate/theft/fiddling crime

  13. Cunts who have personal reg plates usually also have those black windows, in both their cars and their houses. If they’ve got nothing to hide, why have those stupid fucking windows? It’s usually either dodgy criminal types. paggiz, or celebrity knobheads who have them.both.

    • Another thing on modern vehicles that gets in my fillings Norman. When following one of these things with blacked out windows it’s like following a van or a heavy vehicle where you cannot see through to the road ahead. Fucking pointless extra risk and I think there’s a good case for banning the practice.

  16. had a Volvo V40 years ago the plate was R something CNT. the kids called it brian after brian cant. I called it something else !

  18. My brother- in law is the biggest cunt going, even rumours about him noncing his own daughter. He drives around in a Maclaren with CI SJM on it. I’ve no idea where he is these days, but if anyone sees it, please scratch fuck out of it and shit on the door handle, ta.

  20. I saw a Porsche (Cayenne?) in Manchester city centre last weekend with a private/vanity plate which s clearly spelled out “labia”.

    Can’t remember exactly what it was – it wasn’t anything obvious like LAB 1A or LAB 11A… but anyone seeing it would definitely read it as “labia”.

    Quite clever, and certainly ironic.

  22. Thousands of saveable vintage cars and bikes have been scrapped by private numbers dealers over the years for their registrations, just so some vain knobhead can disguise the fact that his rear engined Teutonic deathtrap is last year’s model rather than brand new.
    An excellent cunting…

    • “Rear engined Teutonic deathtrap?”

      You can’t talk about the 911 in those terms Baron!

      Although I would agree.

  23. They might have these so-called witty number plates, but it still reads CUNT behind the wheel to me.

  24. In Yankland you see all sorts of stickers on the backs of cars bragging about this that or the other.

    “Proud Grandfather of Twins.” So what? What are you trying to say? You’re more fertile than the rest of us? You’ve got a bigger cock? Fuck off.

    “My Boy is an Honours Student at Ole Miss”
    “Ole Miss” is Mississippi State University and, as long as you’re white and can hold a pencil up the right way you’re in.

    Fucking Wankers.

    • Stupid wimmin do that here too, Freddie. Daft modern parent mares with stickers like ‘Princess On Board’ and other bollocks about their brats. Similar to posting pictures and details about their kids all over social media and Youtube, modern parents have this weird habit of letting everyone know that they have kids in their cars. They let every creep and peadough going know about their children. Fucking thick cunts….

  25. Motor round here with B19 NOB and I have no doubt in my mind he is, and obviously the twat has fiddled with the 9 just to make doubly sure you know.
    Anybody after a vanity plate should be automatically issued with CUNT 1 and ongoing till they run out of numbers which judging by the amount of motors with vanity plates they surely will.
    Seen one with DAZ on who the fuck would name their sprog after a washing powder!, it was a bog trotter derived plate.

    • Though I remember seeing the B19 NOB or something very similar in Saltaire on a BMW doing silly in a 30 driven by “a member of the community” (stanley). Rememer thinking “highly unlikely”.

    • In 1984, following a Socialist Workers Party party, Piers Corbyn went down on a soaking wet Diane Abbott, not realising that his brother had lost his mess in there a mere 15 minutes earlier.

      • Piers wanted to be shrunken down to microscopic size and be injected into Diane like Dennis Quaid in Innerspace to fight Bill Gates COVID vaccine robots.

  28. I found it much easier and cheaper to change my name by deed poll.
    From now on I am called YM58OCY.

  30. FU 2 has to be my favourite private plate, that at one time belonged to Fiona Richmond, the Playboy Model, & certainly not a cunt. Even D.V.L.A. screwed up on this one, having not realised earlier, what it meant. It’s now on one of those B.M.W. Mini things somewhere, & Miss. Richmond is still alive.

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