Messy Hotel Guests

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I’ve been spending 3 or 4 days over the last 2 weeks at a small B&B hotel in the Sellafield area. And since its sited not too from Scafell Pike its a little bit upmarket, or at least the owners seem to think so!

To be honest its a very nice well maintained hotel with bar and restaurant. And the good thing is that the owner has resisted the temptation to “go modern” in order to appease the trendy soy traveller cunts.

Anyway, I’ve been doing some upgrades to their computers, routers, switches and hardware firewalls. All very standard stuff but it does mean having to go into all 20 odd guest rooms to upgrade each router and ethernet cables from bog-standard cat-5 to cat-6a.

But my main point here is the condition of some of the rooms left by the respective guests!

When I’ve visited rooms in the afternoons they’re all clean and tidy due to the hotel’s house-keepers. But on a few occasions I’ve gone in during the mornings before the hotel staff have had chance to do their thing, and OMG what a fucking mess some of these so-called intelligent guests leave the rooms in:-

Beer bottles and cans scattered across the floor
Beer spray on walls and TV screens
Muddy footprints on bed covers and sofas, and on a couple of occasions curtains!
vomit in sinks and baths
Fast-food cartons stacked or thrown in the bath (with bits of cold food left in)
Dirty clothes (and underwear!) scattered on worktops, bedside tables
And on and on and on…

On closer inspection a lot of these guests are not holiday-makers but contractors and consultants working at Sellafield.

I really don’t understand the mindset of these cunts although I guess they don’t give a shit because they know the hotel staff will clear up their shit every morning.

I would have expected this from tourists – chavvy or classy – but not from well-paid, educated cunts such as these!

Nominated by: Technocunt

88 thoughts on “Messy Hotel Guests”

  1. Are you sure the hotel isn’t housing illegal immigrants, sorry, ‘asylum seekers’, Techno?

  2. I’d tell the messy bastards their rooms would be cleaned once they’d fucked off and not before.

  3. I’ve never left any hotel room a mess.

    People are lazy disrespectful cunts.

    Some poor minimum wage cleaner will have to do it,
    Fuck that.

    Have some pride.

    I used to think as a youngster Keith Moon was great trashing hotel rooms.
    Telly thrown through the window
    Blowing up the bog with explosives etc

    Nowadays I think I’d shoot him the mad cunt.

    • Roger Daltrey explains that the hotels LOVED The Who wrecking the rooms as the staff would put the lads up in rooms that were scheduled for redecorating anyway…

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bw0Hs21gKss

      But yeah, wrecking property of others is crass. Hotels all stink anyway, they are ALL full of bedbugs, even the 5 star ones, the bugs don’t discriminate. Hotels are an arcane concept. Save up more money and rent a flat/house when you go on holiday.

  5. It’s a cunts trick for certain…best not to dwell on the mindset of the dross that do it.

    It could lead to oven.

  6. It’s because they are shameless.
    I always tidy the place up which only takes a minute because I haven’t half destroyed it first

    • Me too. Bed made, yesterday’s clothes packed into the suitcase and bathroom left clean and tidy.

      It’s pig ignorant to leave a mess and expect someone else to clear it up.

  8. To be fair, once you’ve zipped the rent boy’s remains into a suitcase, it’s quite difficult to get his blood out of the bed linens using hotel shampoo.

  9. People of today are selfish, entitled pricks.

    Take the eco loons who bang on about plastic in the ocean, have a demonstration then leave tons of waste behind for some other sucker to deal with.

    And its only gonna get worse.

    • Those Air B ‘n’ B houses get wrecked by guests. The people who run them are cunts, too, usually lezzers who have shit taste in everything and make a fuss when guests break the chair made from paperclips or some such, “it’s not for sitting on!” furniture.

  10. I could never work in a service industry having to clean up after other people. Some of the people I garden for leave beer bottles and food wrappers all over the place after they have finished ‘entertaining’ as well as dog shite on the lawn which I refuse to do until they clean it up. Probably the same arseholes trashing Techno’s hotel rooms, the cunts.

    • People are fuckin dummies.

      Cheeky cunts too.

      Leave the dog shit for the gardener…?!!!

      There’s a cockney bloke near me, binman,
      Sound bloke.

      Someone asked him if he could empty his garage full of shite into the bin lorry!!

      So asking him to risk his job if he got seen.
      Cockney bloke told him

      “Ask Miserable, he’d do it in his van”

      Cheeky fucker said

      “Yeah, but he’d want paying”

      So wasn’t even going to pay him for risking his job!

      • What is it when people bag up dog-shit and hang it from tree’s and fences?

        Is it a decoration or a secret code for a dogging location..

      • It is indeed, Unkle. One I have cunted before.

        Like the dog shit bag fairy is going to come along and remove them.

        I’ve even seen them placed on top of bins marked “Animal Waste Accepted”

      • Now I’m an elderly, arthritic twat I have a gardener.

        I also have a dog.

        I always police the garden before he comes to mow, I’d be mortified if he mowed a turd. The stench!

        Happened to me once when I used to do my own grass cutting. I nearly vomited.

    • I’ve heard of cunts these days who get a gardener in, but the garden is WRECKED not just needing a gardener. As you say, party rubbish everywhere, dog shit, kids toys all over the lawn. Just don’t have grass, trees, bushes, plants if you can’t do the gardening yourself. Pretentious cunts. “Yes, we get a gardener in, we’re very rich, you see, very sophisticated.” Buy a lawnmower, you slob.

      • They are not the usual chavvy suspects either Gordon. Both are professionals and own a successful business, top of the range cars and a house nudging £900K. Nice couple too but just a lack of self-awareness.

      • Most rich people are indeed nice. Most people in general are nice. The MEDIA makes it sound and seem like we live in hellscape, but we don’t, life is pretty great these days. Try living in past centuries when it smelled of shit, piss, rotten animals, rotten corpses of criminals, tyrant kings, superstition, and no internet, etc.

        THE GOOD OLD DAYS! 😀

      • Why not Miserable? I could pinch off a decent effort just before they come home from work and start up the BBQ.

      • Exactly.

        Curl out a big steamer then make your customers pick it up under the impression it’s their dogs.

        Don’t eat sweetcorn or they’ll twig .

      • Where DOES a gardener go when he needs a piss or shit when he is on the job, in a client’s garden? Builders use a portaloo, but what does a gardener use? The house toilet? Surely not, they’d trail in muck and raid the panty drawer. The kids panties. Clear things up, Liberal Liquidator! Literally CLEAN THINGS UP! 😀

      • Stop shouting, is a M…..
        My gardener uses my conviniently located downstairs convience.

        See what I did, there.

        My gardener is a 15 year old lad, who uses my mower and strimmer. It’s his little business and pays his own pocket money.

        I admire him, he’ll probably be PM one day.

  11. I would have thought it’s fucking obvious…….if they are contractors some other cunt is paying the bill so fuck it, we do what we like. You give people something for nothing and they will abuse the privilege. (see NHS, housing benefit, free everything for immos etc etc) That’s the way we are these days.

    • Can’t be…those cunts have security on to make sure nobody can see them shitting on the stairs and trying to groom schoolgirls.

      Napalm.

      • Gentlemen, talk like this upsets one of our fellow members!
        Please use more politically correct language!
        Anyone for some brandy? 🙂

      • The upset person will speak for himself, he’s a big boy. He claims this site is RACIST! Yet he still comes here to sanctimoniously chastise us, thrreaten to leave, actually “leaves” then comes back to…sanctimoniously chastise us all over again, like a total knob. It’s funny in a way. His mate is as bad. This is what happens when you forget that this site is all about having a laugh and not the Oxford Union Debating Club to make the case with facts, figures and boring speeches.

        Let’s crack on with the spunk jokes…

      • Gordon @

        Give it a rest pal.
        Let’s stop with the bickering.

        I know It’s not one sided,
        But even I’m getting bored of it now.

        Just enjoy cunting and free speech,
        Not everyone gets along but we can all be on here without squabbling.

        There’s people I don’t care for who post,
        I just leave them alone if they leave me be.

      • I quite agree with mis. Gordon the moron is such a boring cunt, always has to reply to everyone even when not wanted and with a fucking stupid link. I think admin should ban the cunt, he adds nothing and just pissed others off with his oh I’m so fucking cleaver act. Well let me tell you pal, you are not cleaver, just fucking annoying and that’s why we lose good people on here like fiddler, Vernon, DCI, cuntybollocks and many more to boot.
        I know the rules about cunting cunters but please fuck off.

      • Bravo!👍👍 Excellent behaviour, Admin.

        Excellent appeals, also, Sir Mali and Mis. Good riddance to the shit-stirring, hypocritical, sanctimonious, boring cunt, dragging this site down. General Bullshitter needs to take the hint, too. The cunt (in my opinion) is responsible for Dick Fiddler’s absence, and, I’d wager, the ‘Report Abuse’ farce.

        (You’re welcome! We might take a more hard-line approach from now on – Day Admin)

      • Great call, Admin! 👍

        I believe this is his 3rd ban, which hopefully means three strikes and he’s out FOREVER.

        (Hopefully so – Day Admin)

      • Gordon was a strange one really.

        A relentless poster who I personally didn’t mind too much.

        Really knew his football and was knowledgeable on the subject (for what that’s worth)

        The constant and unnecessary trolling of Gutstick Japseye in particular was more than a bit tedious though.

        Morning Ruff/all

        (Okay, but please don’t take this nom off-topic. Thanks – Day Admin)

  13. It’s the same with free booze at weddings…..big mistake. People who are not used to heavy drinking go fucking mad because it’s free. So they start fighting, puking, wrecking stuff…… just like a bunch of pikies.

    • Free booze work’s parties, weddings, etc = AVOID. It always kicks off and it’s not the ones you’d expect, ie. the hard cunts, it’s a wee lad who headbutts an harmless uncle or something. Seen in a few times and learned that there’s a reason free booze events are for the well-bred, wealth elites not Mad Davie the computer salesman’s stag do.

      • Aye, cunts like Joey Barton kick off after getting pissed. I reckon Viz’s Wee Radge Joe is based on Barton.

  14. You should try the Dolphin in St Ives Cambridgeshire. The sweaty stench of Dinghy bobbers, their camp fire slop, halitosis, and christ , ! Don’t ask about the shitters!

  16. Top Tip –
    Steer well clear of Premier Inn hotels.
    You never know,
    You might get a bed Lenny Henry’s slept in.

    • Or you might touch a curtain that Sir Lenworth had previously used to wipe his knob, dripping with Dawn French’s whiffy overhanging fanny juice, on.

      • I was going to have kippers for tea Mr Cunt Engine now all I can think about is Dawn French and her stinking minge.

  17. The nom picture looks pretty much like the aftermath of a Michael Barrymore pool party.
    Just scatter around a few anal intruder dildo’s and some French letters covered in shit plus the odd corpse with it’s arsehole ripped out then that would pretty much look like Barrymore’s pool patio.
    Cunt.

    • Note to self:

      Pitch a new TV show
      For the alphabet people

      Barrymores Baywatch

      Isla Bryson as Pamela Anderson

      Sandi Toksvig as David Hasselhoff

      Don’t tell the others

      • No problem, Mis.

        I’ve enclosed your post with a Vulcan cloaking device.

        🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • I’m having memories vis a via yesterday’s Tasmanian trout and the poster who said he hopes they eat it afterwards, complete with chef’s special brown crunchy peppercorn sauce (or not depending on which hole they went for)

      • Oh please, I haven’t had tea yet, and after yesterday had to put an excellent fish pie in the freezer.
        I really couldn’t.

  18. Some are straight, some are bent. Same with being tidy and untidy. Evil goes against the grain of being sensible. Sane or insane. But we can’t be black, we must be white. The way of the world my good man, or did I get that wrong.

    • I’m watching the 1977 film the Hulk .
      Which became the popular TV series.

      And it struck me the Hulk was much more likeable than his alter ego Dr David Banner.

      The Hulk was a bit angry but essentially ok,
      Played by deaf dummy body builder Lou Ferrigno.

      Dr David Banner played by Bill Bixby was irritable at best hysterical at worst,
      Sulking, humourless always on the edge of a nervous breakdown.

      I used to watch it with my gran who also liked the Hulk.
      She hated the reporter mcGee who was tailing the Hulk,

      ” He just won’t leave him alone”

      But that’s media types, cunts.

      https://youtu.be/z9MysTXM_P4

      • Nah, Sammy. The Green Cross Code man was Darth Vader. Aka David Prowse. They had to overdub James Earl Jones onto Vader in Star Wars because Prowse had a ‘Wurzels’ type carrott cruncher voice.

      • I remember Banner nicking a shirt off a clothes line and that fucking piano music coming on. At the end of every episode, guaranteed.

        No eye candy in the Hulk, so it wasn’t my cup of Typhoo.
        Daisy Duke or the delicious Lynda Carter as Wonder Woman. Buck Rogers had some nice tarts in it as well. The Princess with the great tits and the very small costumes.

      • The thing with Bixby/Banner was he was such a mealy mouthed irritating and interfering cunt that some fucker always slapped him. It turned him into the Hulk, but every wallop Banner got, he deserved.

      • Sorry Norman, thought you realised I was taking the piss out of the yanks, a trait we Mancunians are known for, which is easy really with the pitiful yanks showing themselves up without having to try.

  19. Civilisation is failing. The human race is devolving into a bunch of ignorant selfish vile cunts.
    If I use a room when I leave you wouldn’t know I had been in there.
    Fuck em fuck all the slobs.

  20. Keith Moon owned a hotel back in the seventies, in a town in the Cotewolds.
    Soldiers never leave a bed unmade unless, its the other woman’s.

  21. Keith Moon owned a hotel back in the seventies, in a town in the Cotswolds.
    Soldiers never leave a bed unmade unless, its the other woman’s.

    • Remember speaking at length in the mid sixties with Keith Moon in the other Cavern Club in Manchester. It happened to be in the resting area. He was forever combing his hair in the mirror is the only thing I can recollect. Seemed to be a nice chap.

  22. My sister worked in TGI Fridays in the 90s. And she told me about the dirty scum that stayed there. Dried cereal in the sink, used rubber johnnies, shit – real shit – on the sheets… Dirty fucking bastards who were dragged up.

  23. Mick Hucknall was a guest on Radio 2 the other day. It reminded me what a copper bottomed weapons grade Mount Rushmore sized pumpkin headed cunt he is….

  24. Apologies after my long absence. Had a shitload of things to deal with. I’ve had bitter experience of this type of thing. I used to work in a hotel about twenty years ago. The mess some of these slobs left behind was unreal. Even a half eaten fish was left in the bed. We had a vicar staying for a few days and the housekeepers reported he’d jizzed all over the bed sheets. Dirty twat. Animals are cleaner than that.

  25. my mother (75) is the opposite of this. last time she stayed in a hotel my father said she dusted the blinds in the room before they left as she said they were “badly needing done”

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