Pakistan’s Flood Appeal

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The U.N. wants a $160 million aid package for Pakistan, but a figure of $10 Billion has been suggested as an early estimate to sort out the clean up.

Floods have made a “bit of a mess” down there. Killed just over a thousand, out of a possible 230 million. It wasn’t their fault. It’s all about us westerners burning that fossil fuel stuff.

The fact that many of these places are a bit overcrowded, with many dim cunts having more than twenty kids, that I am surprised the death toll isn’t much higher.

As one of the most seismically active places on the planet, an earthquake might have been more exciting, like the one back in 2005.

I suppose it would all now be blamed on climate change, just like any other disaster.

Nominated by: Lord Scunthorpe

Helpful link provided by: DCI Gene Cunt

Indi News Link

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And seconded by: Duke of Cuntshire

I’ll second this nom, after a brief search reveals that ambulance chasing charities have sprung up all over the place.

Ooh goody, another disaster we can milk for administration fees, and give maybe four pence in the pound to victims to try and make it look legit.
Here’s one example, theirs plenty more.

Tearfund Appeal Link

In any event the shithole that is Pakistan was worth nowhere near the amount of funds people are suggesting. This is the same country that harboured the world’s most wanted terrorist, shoots girls in the head, and sends child rape gangs to the UK.
By the will of Allah, the toilet has finally been flushed.

94 thoughts on “Pakistan’s Flood Appeal”

  1. You can bet your bollocks that there will be no donations from any Pakistanis resident in the UK, and hardly anything from other Muslim countries.

    Islam is not a charitable religion.

    So fuck them all.

  3. There’re plenty of dinghies on beaches in Kent we can send over there. The fuckers won’t have to wade through the floodwaters, they can paddle, instead. How humanitarian and thinking outside the box is that?

    Wunderbar!

    • Wil make it easier to find their way to rhe English channel I suppose…none of this over land walking stuff

  4. Pakistan is a nuclear power and in cahoots with several rogue states. They have more than enough to waste on these things so they can stand up on their own. After all, enough of them are already here sponging off us and committing the most heinous of crimes. One thing is certain the endemic corruption will ensure most of the money anyone is dumb enough to donate will not go any nearer than Merc and BMW dealerships…

  5. Backward corrupt shithole. The U.S has given almost $70bn alone in the last 70 years. They can’t afford flood defences or better housing that won’t get washed away like Ahmed’s tin shack but they can afford a nuclear weapons programme.

      • Allăh’s wrath might have washed away Achmed’s tin shack but at least all the urinals in Paxtan, having been shat on for years, have finally had a rinse.

        gOD is great!

  7. I suppose if you live in a mud hut at the base of the flood plain of the Himalayas then you might have a spot of bother on occasion.

    Of course many such floods in the past would mean strict planning of hut scattering and works in place to divert flood water and the like…wouldn’t it?

    No?

    Despite billions in foreign aid,mainly from America?

    Hundreds of millions from the UK,despite our sovereign debt well over 2 trillion pounds?

    Still can’t manage to plan and build any sort of infrastructure?

    Blame climate change?

    Rope the BBC as a megaphone for lies?

    Pakistan is a shithole full of medieval savages,that is all there is to it.

    Hand in glove with terrorists for decades,you reap what you sow.

    The filthy corrupt cunts.

    • Of course rich mudslide I mean muslim countries are nowhere to be seen or grudgingly give a pittance.

      Go fuck a camel.

  8. I am going to raise a pint tonight in celebration for the flooding event, like the rag heads celebrated on 9/11 fuck them and their peado way of life

  9. 1. Rumour has it that the floods in Pakistan were started by a suicide plumber.

    2. There’s a new curry been brought out in aid of the Pakistani flood disaster victims. It’s a chicken bury auntie, served with nan dead and poppa gone.

    3. The BNP have donated 6000 crocodiles to the Pakistani flood appeal.

    4. The Queen has sent a letter of condolence to the Pakistani president. She wanted to mention that Britain has plenty of spare pakis if they want some back.

    5. I bet little Mohammed isn’t having to walk 3 miles fetch water now! I think I’ll ask for my 1 a month donation back.

    6. What do you call a Pakistani flood survivor………………….Mustafa dinghy.

    7. What goes around comes around. Pakistanis have been flooding Britain for years.
    .
    8. From space, Pakistan looks like a giant bowl of coco pops.

    9. There is a new diet sweeping Pakistan . It’s called swim fast.

    10. Charity single just released for the Pakistani flood disaster………..Rain drops keep falling on Ahmed

  10. 10,000 crocodiles are being sent. It’s native the mugger crocodile is a bit of an endangered species these days, so that should certainly help.

  11. Just had a look at the Tearfund advert; nearly wet myself laughing!
    It has three suggested amounts- £47, £136 and £258 FFS. Especially amusing is the £136 amount which will provide a family of eight with soap,toothpaste and tampons. I suppose the £136 includes money to pay the person who shows them how to use said products.

      • Reminds me of a very old joke we said at secondary school.

        How to you get a pakki girl pregnant?

        Cum on her shoes and let the flies do the rest.

        gotta be 50 years ago we were saying that….nothing changed much has it?

  12. The fact that Tearfund are demanding such large donations when we have our own cost of living crisis says a lot about their morality – or rather, lack of.

    • 24% of each quid given is swallowed up in running costs/admin and ‘re-investment’ for future causes…whatever that is. 13% just for re-investment’

      That’s like being able to afford to supply the rubber life ring to a drowning guy, but making the rope 2 foot too short to reach him, because that extra money for those two feet has been squirrel away for ‘the future’

  13. Fuck the lot of them. Perhaps if they invested in infrastructure instead of nuclear bombs I might have some sympathy.

  15. Weird how climate change floods Pakistan but not Holland.

    Off topic: Liz Truss had better not make a cunt of it as PM. Never before has Blighty needed correct courses of action or we might as well sink like Atlantis.

    Fingers fucked crossed…

    • ….she’s a cunt already, sp rest assured she will make a right cunt up of it. Won’t be there to come the general election.

      …at least with Boris, we all didn’t know he was a cunt before being elected.

      What they needed was someone with no dirt, gaffs, nothing hidden away in dark closets, someone competent with the balls to say it how it is and sort this fuck fest out in the UK, but guess what? They couldn’t find anyone!

      • Indeed, Chugger. Being PM is pants-shittingly daunting these days, no longer the jolly is was in the Golden Age of Britain. Now it’s like being in the Somme with trench foot that reaches up to your balls.

    • Because they weren’t stupid enough to invest all their spare dough in nuclear weapons and built Delta Works, which is fucking amazing.

      Is what happens when you let cuntish fundamentalists run your country .

      Won’t see a penny of my cash. Oh apart from the money the govt sends them.

      • Great point.

        The Dutch have no nukes but used their dosh to provide flood protection.

        The Joe Dakis spent their dosh on nukes.

        Fuck them.

      • I want to cry.Our country is finished.Same 2 cheeks of the old rancid arse.2 years Truss to sort out our mess.

  16. I hear Lammy has been ranting that the UK needs to urgently help the Pakistanis.

    I thought he didn’t want any ‘white saviours’?

    After the grooming shite and turning cities into absolute shitholes, my heart fucking bleeds.

    • Just had to re-read that, I thought you had written “Lemmy”. Firstly, I thought odd as Lemmy had sadly passed away, and, secondly, I couldn’t really see a seasoned musician, drinker and hellraiser like Lemmy giving two cocaine-sugared shits.

      • Lemmy said to avoid cocaine. “Do speed, it’s much safer.” And boy did he love his speed! Greatly missed.

    • Why can’t MPs chip in with a few hundred quid each? They’ll only go and claim it on Xs the same way they do for gas/electric/petrol/water/booze/food/sex toys etc.

  18. Some cunt knocked on my door asking me to donate to the Pakistani flood charity.

    I told him that unfortunately, my hosepipe only reached the bottom of my garden and that there’s a hosepipe ban anyway.

  19. Am surprised St Greta of Millionaire’s Row, hasn’t jumped on the nearest global stage and shouted “It’s all because of climate change, innit! You must all change your ways to save the planet and also donate hundreds of your filthy English Pounds to these poor sods. Of course I won’t be donating because I am too important, but I will plant a sapling instead. How very dare you!”

  22. Lenny doesn’t want white saviours anymore.
    That’s fine, if Pakistani can afford a Nuclear weapons programme they can afford a few rubber boats and some extra rice.
    I’m sure Muslim countries ( including parts of Yorkshire ) and the African nations will help. There’s nothing left for your begging bowl,
    Jog on, sorry I mean float away.

  23. I suspect Yasur’s hand in this, his uncle Earl Louis wasn’t keen on Parqueys. Let’s hope other shitholes of the Empire are next, Zim, Malaya, Burma and Nigeria are on my wish list.
    Praise be unto Yasur.

  24. Fucking Joe Dakis. I give enough dough buying my fags and booze in their fucking corner shops. Get some of those letterboxes to get their kit off and show us their tits and I might bung them 50p.
    Cunts.

    • Don’t want to see a Joe daki missus with her kit off, that would make me vomit, all those flies and maggots around her growler

  25. Imagine if the UK faced a similar fate and there was serious flooding in the Smoke, the Midlands and Mancland.

    I very much doubt other countries would step up and offer us financial aid. Instead they’ll all be screaming “Ah haaa. That’s what happens when you vote Brexit. Eat shit and die you English pigdog bastards” (but said in a French/German accent)

    The Guardian will also blame Brexit, Whitey and heterosexual men for the cataclysmic disaster- especially if it flooded out Islington and Kensington

    • How about a tsunami crashing up Brighton beach and washing away all the benders. That’s the kind of climate change I wanna see.

  26. These are people that want nothing more than to see our destruction.

    Yet they want a handout when things go badly.

    How.does fuck right off sound.

    • It would be amazing if Liz Truss used her first House of Commons address to say what most people are thinking:
      “Fuck off, you pakı cunts, I hope you all drown.”

      • …swiftly followed by “…and you cunts in the Channel”

        Fuck me, that would get some votes……strangely she won’t say that, because governments think it will be the opposite and will lose votes.

        Sadly, the way it’s going, the more fucking raggies we get in eventually they will get the vote, and will logically strengthen the vote against ‘radical’ ideas such as that.

      • Some online media outlets are already describing our shiny new prime minister as “far right”

        😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  27. Not entirely relevant, but I am strongly of the opinion that Imran Khan is the biggest cunt ever to walk out onto a cricket field.

  28. I have sympathy for the P*ki cunts in Pakistan at least they are over there and not here, but they are selfish cunts, all that rainwater going to waste and we have hosepipe bans.

    One of my numb nut neighbours had a sprinkler running yesterday evening, either thick as pig shit and doesn’t pay attention to the weather forecast or is just a self entitled cunt. It pissed down last night for about half an hour and has been pissing down this morning 😂

  29. Those poor people.
    I wept when I heard.
    I’m currently raising funds,
    Send a 2mile long bar of soap.

    They were all in their pyjamas when the floods struck!
    Wonder if any retrieved a black rubber brick ?

  30. As my old boss used to say about such things, just before biting on a Bakewell tart,

    ‘Fuck ’em…’

    • Seriously, what explanation do their religious leaders have for their god visiting this disaster upon them? There they are, praying like fuck every day and he goes and does this. Anything good happens to them, they’re told it’s a gift from god, so what do they tell them when he decides to drown them in a flood?
      It’s the same when boxers or MMA fighters are interviewed after a win. “First of all I’d like to thank my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.” What for, helping them beat some fucker up? What about their opponent? He believes in god too. Or at least he used to.

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