Fantasy Wings

We’ve all seen the end of meritocracy in most professions. Even the armed forces. However, it seemed that thankfully, the airline industry wouldn’t go down this path, for obvious reasons. Pilots need to be pretty much perfect, with IQs through the roof.

If you’re up at 37,000 feet and all the engines fail, there is a good chance you can survive, albeit with a probable heavy landing, unless in the middle of the Pacific. But you need to react quickly, work out how far the nearest possible airport or landing spot is and the calculations needed for pitch, airspeed and approach. Where can you dump any fuel before landing (to avoid a huge fireball if you land too heavily?) All of this needs to done in minutes. High IQ, calmness under extreme pressure and great mathematical skills.

On top of that, in an emergency, can you (in seconds) work out and correct the issue? Can you land in poor weather conditions?

Well fuck all that.

Let’s shoehorn dark keys in and take our chances now. Diversity, innit?

By the way, if standards are the same then all’s good. However, I don’t think they’ll like seeing 90% of dark keys failing the tests, so I have my doubts.

One place you should not fuck about is up there.

Fantasy Wings?

Fucking perfect name.

“Cabin Crew, prepare to hit the ground like a fucking dart!”

Fantasy Wings Website

Nominated by: Cuntybollocks

58 thoughts on “Fantasy Wings

  1. There are exceptions,CB. That Denzil Washington chap landed his plane upside down,after he’d been on the sauce all day.
    Although I’m not sure Denzil from only fools and horses could have done the same,so you may have a point.

  2. “ One of the biggest problems facing the aviation industry is a lack of diversity. ”
    Really?
    Not the world’s governments implementing stupid lockdowns? Fuel prices? Green tossers?
    No. Diversity.

  3. “One of the biggest problems facing the aviation industry is a lack of diversity”.

    Have any of these cunts visited an airport in the last couple of years? Because of course the first thing I think of when getting on a plane before hoping that my luggage is on the same flight is that I hope the pilot is a w*g.

  4. “Good morning sir, welcome to B U P A. I understand you are here to have a blood clot removed from your brain”

    “Yes…I must be honest I am quite nervous about this procedure”

    “Not to worry sir, we have just taken on this South London blick brain surgeon. Now he hasn’t quite got the temperment and not as highly qualified as our previous surgeon Mr Jones who was with us for many years who has retired, but we had to take some of these blicks on against our better judgement, but I’m sure Mr Oggwagga will do a reasonable job”

  5. Why has everything got to be all inclusive, what the fuck does it matter if 90% or more pilots are white male, it’s not the point, can the cunt fly the plane is more important.
    And I would rather have a white European than a fucking rag head, much better chance of landing on the runway rather than a tall building.

    Black pilot, ‘there will be slight delay while I just pop to KFC’ chiggun!!

    • As the flight deck crew are supposed to eat different meals (to minimise the risk of both becoming incapacitated through food poisoning) just imagine the cockpit carnage when the pilot and first officer get a bit stabby over who gets the chiggun option.

    • That’s my point.

      I don’t care if the pilot is white, black or green with yellow spots.

      As long as the cunt can fly the plane safely and wasn’t shoehorned in because ‘diversity’, I couldn’t give a fuck.

      I like to look at facts and African pilots seem to crash more than others.

      I’m sure most of them are great pilots, but I don’t doubt some of these cunts on this program will sneak through, after being ‘helped’ to pass the tests.

      We’ve seen the same shite going on in academia (maths is too hard for certain groups so make things easier for them), in the armed forces and fire service (wimminz not having to carry the same weightloads etc).

      It lowers standards. It’s wrong in any profession, but up there at 37,000 feet? What a fucking stupid idea lol.

      Of course, no fucking help for honky kids in deprived areas on such schemes I notice.

      They can fuck off.

      • As soon as you start dragging everyone down to the lowest common denominator it will just ensure that no one wins, and in the worse case scenario, cost lives.

  6. Sub-Saharan Africans and their diaspora are good at athletic sports. They used to be good at music. You would not want them anywhere near anything scientific or technical. The % that can handle technology is the lowest of all the races, as is their average IQ.
    But that’s racist innit.

  7. Fuck me, I’m shit scared of flying as it is, I don’t want a fucking witch doctor in the pilot’s seat. Anyone got a second hand dinghy going cheap?

  8. Awesome news for the staycation industry.

    Won’t get me on another plane now just in case

  9. I recently read there is a new start up airline with all minority pilots. Shit Holian International Airways or SHIA for short. Discounted rates from any city in the world to New York. One way service only.

  10. In fairness, most are very high almost all of the time. It’s usually on ganja or self-importance, though, not manoeuvring a complex 400tonne 747 at 500mph.

    • Yeah you could. You could make a film about it, good opportunity to fill the screen with more “diverse” actors. All the pilots and trolly dollies would be Africunts. The passengers would be an assortment of spades, Joe Dakis, Chinks, Spics and Wops.
      Of course you would need one whitey to play the part of the far right terrorist.

  11. You can`t win.
    Recently I bought an allotment as my lady garden is rather small (but neatly trimmed).
    I called it My Plantation and I only grew cotton, as it’s a cash crop.
    Following a bountiful harvest I advertised for cotton pickers – but I made the mistake of insisting that they all be black, as I wanted to be as diverse and inclusive as possible.
    You would not believe the backlash.

    • I live in the Deep South (USA) and had a similar problem. I thought I would avoid the problem by rotating my crop and broadening the scope of my advertising. So this year I grew beans and advertised for Mexicans.

      I still got a backlash. You can’t please these fuckers.

  12. When working on the dark continent always had a look who was in the left seat if it wasn’t white off we all got.

  13. As I’m unlikely to travel by plane ever again I have no opinion on what race the pilot is, but that website looks well sketchy.
    It’s really vague about what it’s supposed to help ” minorities” achieve in the aviation industry, apart from a job as a baggage handler, but I bet their fees are eye-watering.

  14. If these blick and asian cunts drive planes like they drive fucking Nissan micras then we can kiss are arses goodbye.

  15. I can’t see how this can work. I got my PPL in the eighties. Probably the most significant milestone in your training is first solo, for most people after about ten or twelve hours flying. Normal procedure is to fly a few circuits with the instructor, then he alights and you fly a circuit alone. You either get it right or do the other thing. There is a proportion of trainees who never go solo and thus never get their ticket. Some of them simply lose their nerve and won’t go up alone, some the instructor just will not sign off to go solo. There are half a dozen ground exams to pass in which you need to score pretty well 100%. Then you have the navigation exercise where you fly to two other airfields solo and back to base. Finally you have the flight handling test which is kind of like your driving test in a car where you have to demonstrate you can handle the plane in any circumstances. In my 71(!) years I have known and worked with quite a number of jam spoons, Precious few of whom I think would complete all this successfully. And the requirements for an ATPL are way beyond this.

    But finally there are plenty of airlines in third world countries whose air crew are the local ethnics. Go look at the accident figures and compare them to western airlines.

  16. You terrible people where would we be without all those black aviation pioneers.
    The Wright Brothers · Charles Lindbergh · Amelia Earhart.Chuck yeager.

    Coming soon to a cinema near you..

  17. The RAF Top Brass are behind all this racial shite. Ni**er was buried at Scampton, The cunt couldn’t fly but was an ace act at licking his balls.

  18. Take one look at the photo.

    Look at the utter confusion on Jamal’s face, as he stares vacantly at the assorted dials and controls.

    The only thoughts going through that tiny brain are ‘Chiggun. Wheres dem whitey wimminz at? Gibs muh dat free shit whitey and chiggun’.

    At no point is Jamal ever going to be let loose on those controls solo.

  19. Look what happened the last time there were towelies or similar on the flight deck of airliners, twin towers fire up any memories for anyone?

  20. It’s total bollocks.
    Something to give the diversity is everything to feel happy about, and the race baiters to whinge about.
    Meanwhile, in the real world, there there are stringent tests to pass before you go anywhere near an aircraft, let alone solo in one, so I don’t think safety will be an issue.
    Perhaps the drive might encourage a few of the people who are daily called by the usual suspects for not ‘fitting in’ to try and do that and serve their country.

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