Awkward X-Ray Questions

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Apparently every X ray department in hospitals must now ask ANYBODY of child bearing age if they are pregnant before they have an x ray. So every red blooded, normal, hairy arsed geezer must be asked if he is up the duff for fear of offending some fucked up tranny weirdo who might have recently had a cock up his fanny. Confused? You fucking will be.

I was thinking……..if some bloke had a nice beer gut wouldn’t he take offence at such a question? “Fuck me, I come here for an X ray and this bitch is taking the fucking piss.”

Wouldn’t he be entitled to compo for hurty feelings? Shouldn’t somebody be sacked for blatant “fat shaming”? I don’t think the wokies have thought this one through.

Can’t do links Admin but I’m relying on some cunt to help me out. Ooooh xx

GB News Link.
(Link kindly provided by the suave and sophisticated Ruff Tuff Creampuff)

Nominated by: Freddie the Frog

44 thoughts on “Awkward X-Ray Questions”

  3. Excellent!!! A mate on mine mentioned this Friday while playing golf 🏌️‍♀️ to which everyone in the group all said shut up you daft twat It’s been said afore yet I’ll repeat it fucking modern world is mad.

  5. What are getting so worked up about Freddie? It’s not that time of the month, is it?

  6. I’m disappointed to learn the this nom is not the one I assumed it was: awkward questions like “tell me Sir (or Madam), how did that large bottle of ketchup end up in your rectum?
    Oh, you were dusting in the nude and slipped over onto it in the pantry?”

    • The way things are going Thomas it will be mandatory to have something stuck up the arse.
      Especially when going to the hospital.

      England,home of Lord Nelson and deranged trannies.

      • My fucking GPs answer to every complaint involves sticking something up my anus. Wouldn’t mind but it’s a bloke. Wanted to put a finger up it last time! Told him to fuck off and get a rent boy to satisfy his perverse desires, he gets paid enough. There was a Dr Shah (I think, possibly Patel) in NW London about 1990, a GP who liked to take cervical smear samples using his middle finger nail. After several patients complained the GMC gave him a mild admonishment and retraining that using the correct implement could be just as much fun. One of a number of cases that went to tribunal around this time with similar circumstances. There was the GP who liked to press his little hard on against female patients, but in Dr court claimed it was a packet of polo mints. Think he got a slap on the wrist too. He might have been Asian but he could have said extra strong or Murray mints! All the above is verifiably true, reading the GMC disciplinary summary makes Premiership footballers look like choirboys.

  7. I can see that hospital staff will have to be very careful if virtue signalling poofter MPs like Lloyd Russell Moyle, he of the beard and Dame Edna Everage glasses doesn’t get asked if he is preggers when he turns up next time for the proctoscope. He will immediately report to Dame Kweer, whose blood, doubtless, will boil yet again for the slight against his tranny friends.

  9. What happens when some Peaceful turns up and gets asked if he is up the duff? As I understand it Islam is not too keen on trannyism and that sort of shit. Might he not take offence? It all sounds a bit raaaaaaaay-sist to me.

    • According to the Muhammed book of fairy tales, Man will be born of man and live forever. Allegedly, no I am not an islamic nutjob either on three counts. 1 I eat pork. 2 I like my alcoholic drink. 3 I dont fiddle kiddies.

      If I get asked am I pregnant a boot in the bollocks or cunt will persuade them otherwise

  10. The most worrying thing is that medical professionals are prepared to tacitly accept such a medically impossible scenario….all to pander to the feelings of a tiny minority and their deranged supporters.

    • I’d imagine that rather than attempting to x-ray Dame Elton’s innards, some kind of radar system is aimed up his tunnel entrance..or the Quack bellows..” Hellooo…is anybody in there ?” and
      then counts the seconds until they can hear the echo

    • If the NHS has the resources for committees of senior management to sit around discussing idiotic non issues then it is about time that its absurdly generous funding was reduced.

      • Absolutely spot on Guzzi! The fix for most of this shit is to turn off the money supply. An important spin-off is that it is tax payer funded so we would all be significantly better off.

  11. A few years ago, if a male told a medical professional that they might be pregnant they’d be sectioned under the Mental Health Act. Now, they’re vaunted for their bravery, and can probably expect to be elected to parliament very soon. Cunts.

  12. Men can get pregnant.
    From food.
    Few years ago at a funeral I ate a beef an onion pie, meant be for everyone but I ate the fuckin lot it was that good!
    Washed it down with about 12pints of Theakstons.
    Well next day my tummy looked swollen.

    Day after that it was round like a barrel.
    I started getting moody,
    And had to wear elasticated jeans,
    Got bit weepy.

    Pregnant women will tell you giving birth is painful and theyre right!
    The fat cunts .

    My waters broke the next evening and started getting cramps.
    My missus rushed me to Stepping Hill hospital.

    She helped me with my breathing as I put my feet in the stirrups and wiped the sweat from my brow.

    Then it happened!
    A red hot pain,
    And a earth shattering fart let rip
    BBBRRRAAPPpppppp…

    Flocks of birds fled the trees in alarm,
    Dogs set to barking
    Babies to wailing
    Car alarms set off

    And then, ..plop!
    A healthy 7lb3 brown baby entered the world .

    And that little brown baby?
    We obviously put him up for adoption but he went on to be slap happy thespian Will Smith.

    My unwanted son.

  13. I thought this was going to be about awkward questions like:

    “What exactly were you doing to have this metallic object inside your urethra Mr Knee?”

    Ron’s been absent for a while.

  14. That’s anyone who has a uterus between the age of 6 & 73 then, according to the Guiness Book of Records. Are the really going to follow this one through?

  15. Great and very funny nom.

    I nearly spat my tea out with laughter reading it.

    You certainly have a way with words Freddie.

    Another day – yet more fucking madness.

    • Similarly, will they be asking women whether they’ve checked each bollock anf to remind them to have a monthly feel around their growbag.

      • Expect we’ll soon have doctors routinely poking their fingers up women’s bottoms to check for enlarged prostates…

  18. A pregnant man is just a women who looks like a man. We have become a dictatorship of the minorities. Fucking retards.

  19. Not entirely sure this one is true.

    I had an MRI scan in the week for a suspected mini stroke and the only thing they were interested in was do I work with metal? Do i have any metal implants? Are there any shards of metal in my body from accidents, explosions etc?

    Apart from my piercings, the answer was no on all counts.

    Never got asked if I was pregnant by the pretty nurse.

    She was more interested in the piercings and where they are. 😁

  20. About time this country stopped pandering to the nutters and the chocolate faces.

    Are you pregnant?

    No, I gave birth already this morning to 50 million knuckle children, you daft cunt.

  21. I think that when women get examined by a male doctor they have a female nurse in the room as well.

    So in future, if you go to see your male doctor for cock problems or a bollocks exam, will you have a nurse in the room, just in case you might be ‘identifying’ as a woman?

  22. Anyway, it’s easy to solve this potentially offensive question.
    Short questionnaire.
    “Do you have an internal concealment?”
    ” if yes, is it likely to be waving?”
    Sorted.

  23. “Are you pregnant?”
    “I’m a Man you daft cunt – is this your real job? – Can you get someone in here that knows what the fuck they’re on about?”
    This is the thin end of the intolerant and quite frankly insane wedge – we will soon be at the stage where treatment is refused for those who it has been deemed hold “unacceptable views”.

    • If it’s a sexy nurse, I’m going to say that I am pregnant and about to give birth out of my nob (or ‘birthing pole’ as I shall call it).

      Then, simply whip it out and I’ll tell her to help me give birth to my several million tiny children. I’ll inform her that ‘hand massage’ is fine, but if she does it with her gob the birthing process will be much quicker.

  24. I had some of that shite on an official looking form a few week back, just scribbled all choices out except for transgender bumder, and ticked that box.

  25. The NHS needs drastic and immediate reform. This genderbenderism is not some sort of essential frontline service, it’s purely ideological.

    Scrap this and all the diversity wank, no more contracts for Crapita and end the disastrous PFI schemes which make services more expensive, less efficient and merely serve executive directors and board members, such as certain Tory cunts.

    Introduce nominal charges for 18-75 year-olds seeing GPs to weed out the timewasters and spongers (benefit scrotes are NOT exempt), plus extra charges for fat cunts who are 20 points over the upper ‘safe’ limit or higher on the BMI scale, as well as higher charges for smokers and enormous fines for drunks filling up A&E.

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