Jeremy Vine [7]

Jeremy Vine is a cunt, we recently switched to radio2 in work due to all the noise and signal problems with DAB.

So with radio 2 you get this cunt Jeremy Vine, sometimes it’s interesting but more often than not its just verbal diariouh, cunt boy is talking about the cunt cyclists getting killed by trucks, where they have ridden up the side of a truck in traffic on the inside (these fuckers do this all the time), anyway JV says it’s not the fault of the fuck monkey cyclists, it’s the fault of the drivers and all vehicles with any blind spot should be taken off the road.
This means lorries, buses, bin lorries, vans, certain cars, ambulances, police, fire engines.

So Jeremy you thick cunt 6 hours of that and the whole country will gind to a halt you stupid fuck, bellends like this clown are exactly the twats who slide down the sides of lorries and put themselves in harms was. Wouldn’t it be better for common sense to be activated and even if there isn’t a danger sign, the brain should tell you it’s not a good idea.
JV goes on to say cyclists are more important than other road users, it would be interesting to see how new push bikes are delivered to bike shops without the blind spot infested cyclist killer van.

So JV is a cunt who if he believes his own bullshit must be on fucking drugs, what an absolute cunt…

Nominated by: Fuglyucker

Extra petard hoisting provided by CuntyMort:

For your pleasure cunters, everyones favorite cunt on radio 2 Jeremy Vine. This dozy bellend was too posh to ride on the road like other cunts on two wheels. Instead Jeremy decides he was going to ride on grass, hit a divot and had to be rushed to hospital. Fortunately Jeremy hit his head and blacked his eye.

A great pity the injuries were not more severe and we could have a rest from the twat.

44 thoughts on “Jeremy Vine [7]

  1. Just rename his segment Cyclemania with Jeremy Vine. It’s all the cunt seems to car about.

    One day he’ll turn into Cy-kill from Transformers knock-off, GoBots

  2. Off topic, “Brief Encounter” on the tele at the moment.
    Celia Johnson’s accent gives me the horn.
    Am I a pervert?

    Yes – NA.

  3. Typical metropolitan, self-important, gobshite. What sort of cunt rides a penny farthing, anyway? A BBCunt! Pity the fucking tool didn’t fall arse over tit down a mineshaft.

    • The sort of utter cunt who describes the privately owned motor car as “dangerous and outmoded”

      Raleigh etc stopped making the penny farthing in favour of the modern safety bicycle long ago for a good reason. They were a fucking death trap.
      Hopefully they still are…

  4. Hate this cunt with a vengence WHY? You might ask. The cunt is breathing, that’s why. Fuck off, if that cunt Jones blows the rugby…….

  5. What’s his 1 good idea fucking topping himself and his wanker unfunny brother in a murder suicide.

  6. A “scary accident” ?
    Fell off your bike? Get back on it,you cunt.
    Another sanctimonious ‘talking bollocks’ head from the haunted fishtank.
    He is any sort of cunt for any number of reasons,the floor is open for Jeremy Slime.

  7. I say let’s ban anything that isn’t a bike inside the M25. Then get a camera crew to follow this cunt as he goes into a supermarket, sees there is nothing there and realises that the only deliveries made by bike are Deliveroo, and that without vans and lorries there’d be fuck all to buy.

    • Nice idea, but to make it work, you’d have to ban anything that isn’t a motorless bike, otherwise there’d be an overnight explosion of Piaggio Ape 50s and their Indian cousins on the roads….you’d be amazed at how much shit fleets of these little buggers can shift, and there’s already a significant percentage of populace corralled by the M25 from cultures well versed in the capabilities of these beasties.

      And all you allegedly need is a provisional, as the Ape 50 is technically moped class.

  8. Landed on his head? Harmless. Pity he didn’t land on his arse, then he might not have been able to talk out of it for a bit.
    A nuclear grade cunt.

    Afternoon all.

  9. Roads are either single or dual lane (well mainly) that suggests that if lorry is in front of you (cunt on a bike) it is in the only traffic lane, unless there is a dedicated cycle lane (which should be compulsory not optionally) available.
    Riding up the inside of a truck isn’t a ‘traffic lane’ , do it at your win risk, Lycra wankers!

    Vine is a cunt!

    • Lycra!! Yuk. I once saw an old cunt on a bike in Lycra, and clearly visible through his tights, the knotted bulges of various veins….yuk yuk yuk

  10. I like the idea of this cunt of a shithouse owning a victorian pushbike.
    He could ride it into a volcano.

    The fucking flowery windbag soy cunt.

  11. I do a lot of cycling, quite a bit on the road – in between escaping an enraged Fiddler and a terrifying Mnc I get plenty of exercise! 😀 (Apologies DFF & Mnc – I couldn’t resist it – wicked Man I am!)
    A few kilos of aluminum ain’t ever going to come off best against a vehicle, and without wishing to sound awful if fuckwits on bikes don’t have the wit or care to protect their own lives I can’t really shed a tear if things go Pete Tong on them – have less sense of arrogant entitlement and more sense of self preservation you daft sods. (Our man DCI will be somewhere growling as we speak, probably seen more dicks on bikes than the last “transbender pride bicycle rally”!)
    Ride safe, ride legal and ride considerably – how hard is it? And I am also always mindful that when on the road I pay zero tax and insurance to ride a bike which seems wholly unfair to road users who are ransomed for it.
    Vine? Cunt, for a number of reasons – if ever we needed a left turning lorry..
    Might have a word with my mate “Marty the toothless madman” the HGV driver and see what he can do! 😀☠
    (Me and a few of my Family are doing the annual charity bike ride soon – good charities, local causes – animal sanctuaries, learning centres, after school activities for da local yoot, init etc and I simply cannot allow any of them to come in with a faster time than me!).
    On other news I have just has a marvellous and capacious fry up of bacon, eggs and mushrooms so if I succumb to cholesterol poisoning can someone please break into the cave and for fks sake delete my browsing history?! 😱

  12. Radio 2? What the fuck do you expect? Get Talkradio on and stop listening to the Blatantly Biased Corporation cunts.
    DAB problems? Time for a whip round for a new radio.
    Fucking hate Jeremy Vine though so excellent cunting.

  13. All Jeremy’s are cunts.

    If it wasn’t illegal to plough a van into cyclists everyone would do it.

    Itd quickly become a very popular sport with drivers paid the same as formula one drivers.

    Crowds would line the road cheering as some Bradley Wiggins bummer tried to outmanoeuver white van man.

    And the Tour de France would be ace.

    Donate the smashed up bikes to local scrap metal merchants?
    Helping local businesses.

    Always thinking
    Always caring

    • Poor old Jezza Vine got taken out by a divot in some grass, serves him right, the cunt. Its a real hipster injury, getting a black eye whilst falling off your 150yo penny farthing. Like poking yourself in the eye because the glasses you are wearing for show haven’t got lenses in them.

      • LL@ – What daft fker rides a Penny Farthing (an inherently unwieldy and difficult to manoeuvre bag of scrap IMO) on grass in the first place?
        Oh yes – Jeremy Vine.
        Never mind then.

      • This being London, Vern, it will probably be the quickest form of transport after Khans congestion charge shake down and bankrupted TfL.

    • Mnc@ – If you see a BMX with tassels on the bars don’t run that one over – it belongs to, er, a “friend of mine”!

      • Hehehe 😀
        Its more those lycra sports cyclists I hate Foxy.

        My next door neighbour when I was a kid always rode a bike,
        Old school type, bicycle clips on,
        Always whistling,
        Just a ordinary working man who couldn’t afford to run/buy a car.
        Nowt against blokes like that.

        Its these militant lycra twats I hate.
        Think riding 2-3 abreast is reasonable and a queue of traffic behind them.
        Well they can quote the fuckin Highway code all they like.

        Never get shoes that fit nice after 3.5 tonnes gone over their feet.

  14. I purposefully avoid this cunt wherever possible.

    I switch Radio 2 off at 12 noon when Ken finishes, and this cunt comes on.

    His radio show is a just a steaming pile of left wing propaganda, with the wet turd himself at the helm.

    As a current affairs radio host, he is not fit to lick the dog shit off Jimmy Young’s brogues.

    As old JY is dead, – it’s Dick Dyke saying bye for now.


  15. If you look in a dictionary for the spelling and source of the word ‘redundant’ there’s a picture of Jeremy Vine.
    Or Jeremy Vile, as I prefer to call him.

  16. Every time I see a cyclist on the road I wish I was driving a challenger tank. Or a combine harvester.
    Fuck I hate them.

    • Don’t need a tank GJ. Approach fast, switch off the engine, when three feet behind them hit the horn. Best done on a rural road where check the mirror and you may see them disappear into the ditch with the bike on top of them. Restart engine.

  17. Riding 2, 3, 4 abreast is an incredibly stupid and dangerous thing to do – had a huge argument when I was (briefly) on twatter with some “cycling association” prick who insisted riding this way was safe – it ain’t, you have to go right into the other lane to get by them and if it’s a choice of a head on with something coming towards you or swerving into the twats to the left I know what most people would do – ride single file in groups of four, no more – much easier and safer to pass.
    And – what the fk is with the silly outfits? 🤷‍♂️ – I have tracksuit bottoms, a top, jacket and warm gloves in winter, shorts and a top in summer – there is no need whatsoever for all the lycra tomfoolery, none.
    And a quick heads up – saddle design and angle is critical – it saves developing a prostrate the size of a football, 99% of bikes I see have completely the wrong saddle/setup and this can do no end of harm.

    • Last time I rode a bike,
      About 16-17yrs old?
      One of them racer bikes,
      I felt like id been at a Barrymore pool party my arse was that numb.

      Dont go in for comfort do they?

      • Same here Miserable, when I was at school. I had one of those quick release seats and some fucker nicked it. My own fault really, I should have taken it off and stored it somewhere by couldn’t be faffed that day.

        I had to ride it home (standing up) with just the metal tube bit with no seat, like it was Elton Johns exercise bike! I would have happily beat to death which ever cunt nicked it with bike chain that day. The Shame

      • Hehehe 😀

        At the time LL,
        Just left school, I was on a upholstery course (old YTS)

        I upholstered the seat!😁
        It looked mad as fuck but was comfy.

        Cant remember what happened to the bike, swapped,sold, nicked, whatever.
        But I never liked the fuckin thing.
        Loved my old Raleigh Chopper though ☹️

  18. I can’t cunt cyclists, or bikes, sadly my uncle was killed at the age of 12 riding the 5miles to school – by some cunt driving like one.

    They lived in the sticks and no bus in them days in the rural south, so using the treader was the only option – else it was a canning for being late or a beating from his ole man for not being on time.

    I’ve oft commented on Jeremy fucking Swine however – having heard this evil piece of shit on his ‘radio show’ which is basically a open house for him to sow division and hatred.

    He’s a truly hatefully lefty arsewipe of a sanctimonious London centric prick that needs a rusty fence railing inserted up his rectum.

  19. Peleton should be compulsory for anyone with urge to dress up like Eddy Merx, then they are off the bloody roads, fecking pedalphiles.

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