Al Murray [2]

I truly hate Al Murray.
Not because hes not funny but because hes unpatriotic.

He did a tv series called “why everybody hates the English”
Slagging off his country.
Now hes a new tv show called
“Why do the Brits win every war?”
Basically questioning our historical victories, and sneering at us.
He plays things a bit ‘jack the lad’ but hes a fraud.
You see Alistair James Hay Murray is a direct descendant of novelist Thackeray,
His great grandad was the bishop of Rochester
His cousin is sir Edward Leigh MP,
Al was educated at Oxford university.
Hes descended from Scottish aristocracy and married into Austrian aristocracy.
And hes a liberal.
I fuckin despise the fat sack of shite.
Hates this country yet his family own half of it!
Alastair you traitor if I ever get the chance to meet you I’ll spit in your fat fuckin face.

Nominated by: Miserable northern cunt

65 thoughts on “Al Murray [2]

  1. I’ll bet my arse that he’s a Remain voting cunt to.
    Either way, he’s marginally less mirth inducing than a particularly virulent bout of dysentery.
    Laugh? I thought I’d never start….and I didn’t either. Cuntius!

  2. He reminds me f that Arfur Smiff cunt…or Politics answer to Max Bygraves – Keir “I Wanna Tell Ya A Story” Starmer – he needs hands, – to wank Peter Mandelson.

    All three are bogus “working class” types who clearly lead different lives away from the cameras and microphones.

  3. Sorry, disagree 100%. He is funny, British AND patriotic – look at Youtube videos if you thing otherwise.
    You are WRONG MNC!

      • Mickey luv,
        im not wrong.
        Id hold my hand up if I was.
        Ive never been more right in my life.
        He’s a bona fide sneering, ashamed to be British, uoper crust, treacherous little fat prick.
        And you can tell him that from me.

      • Absolutely. Some don’t get that his pub landlord act is a piss take (of the patriotic working class white man). Remember him standing against Farage? Ask yourselves why he did that. He’s definitely a champagne socialist of the worst kind. One from aristocracy and genuine privilege.

        Nothing wrong with that, as long as you don’t sneer at it after you’ve taken advantage of it (land, property, place at Oxbridge, marriage into more aristocracy, leg up with entertainment career etc).

        If he gives everything back that he’s got due to privilege (which would be everything in his case) then I’d half respect the cunt.

        He’s a posh champagne socialist knobend… allegedly of course.

        Pub landlord was fucking shit anyway.

        Get fucked.

      • Right on Cuntybollocks. Never found him that funny but I’ll never forgive him of making our election process a complete joke. He is definitely a cunt.

    • It’s an Alf Garnett routine basically, which mocks real patriotic British people, he’s secretly laughing at you mickey c!

    • Murray is a Looney Liberal Remainer. Everything he’s done since portraying a teenage pub landlord (still in his public schoolboy blazer, bizarrely) has been part of the anti-British agenda. Murray and the media see patriotism as the reason why GB left the EU and why Remain lost the referendum, and they can’t cope, so they try to denigrate everything British or patriotic. First he was exploiting lad culture, now he’s a mercenary for remainers – trying to get rich from inciting hate a dividing people. He’s just a spoilt rich kid, rebelling from his aristocratic family really.
      He’s a talentless, unfunny cunt – any other opinion merely displays a lack of good taste or discernment.

  4. This one could get interesting….

    I think I have seen him on TV years ago-a faux Pub Landlord. It was all “Ironic comedy”?

  5. Grant from Eastenders with humor rather than serious
    Leave it , I’m a Mitchell ain’t I
    Condescending cunt behind it, not Grant that is.

  6. Hannah Murray gave me the horn in Skins (2007) and Bill Murray is funny, Al Murray makes me puke.

    Wouldn’t be surprised if he was a friend of Matt Hancock.

  7. His ‘Pub Landlord’ is also a blatant sneer at the working class. Murray is as fake as Bruce Jenner’s snatch and wouldn’t know a real pub landlord if he fell over one.

    As for ‘Why Do The Brits Win Every War’? Well, we won the two big ones, the World Wars. And we know that’s what Murray really hates. That human slug Al Murray is basically pissing on the graves of every brave Tommy who gave their lives in those conflicts. I dare say ‘Al’ also passionately despises Sir Winston Churchill.

    Oh aye, we also beat the Argies, Napoleon, the Spanish Armada, the IRA (until Blair capitulated), and the Japanese. So up yours, so called Al Murray.

  8. Luvvie with a message. Oxford, History. Say no more. It’s all been said.

    Wonder if there’s anyone in the business who would do us Starbucks Barista so we could see who’s laughing then?

  9. Great pity that most of the third World hates the English so much they spend all their money? Trying to get here. Have they not clicked that in the not too distant future shiteholeastan will be a fucking paradise compared to most of England.

  10. In one of my more sedate daydreams Field Marshal Montgomery strolls up to this mockney cunt and empties his service revolver into his head.

    Fucking splendid.

  11. Yeah, the 21st century rip off of Alf Garnet. You can imagine his audience…….middle class, remoaners and wokies to a man. Pay good money to have a mass sneer up at the working class and their values.
    Bunch of wankers.

    • Thing about Alf Garnet Warren Mitchell was definitely leftish in real life. But he played it in character. This fella’s perona isnt a ‘character’.

    • A mate of mine went to see him a few years ago and walked out half way through. He is a fucking tight cunt so in doing that, he really must have hated the show.

  12. The liberal left are always aeons out of date. Didn’t he have a pit bull terrier in the ‘pub’? As well as the obligatory conspicuous Union Jack.
    His accent all wrong.
    I knew where he was coming from straight away.
    Like that luvvie Steven Berkoff who did the same act.
    I was out with nothern men who looked both of them last night. You couldnt get more polite ‘inclusive’ people.

    • He was a prick for doing that. However, not being elected freed Farage up to properly fight for our escape, something Remoaner turds should be reminded of whenever they bring up his failure to become an MP.

      I’ve met Al Murray and he is well-spoken, middle-class, and actually rather funny.

      • Hes not middle class Maggie.
        Hes a aristocrat,
        So firmly upper class.
        His family own a lot of land in Scotland and the border region.

      • He awaits the titles
        Duke of Athol
        Barony strange
        Both come with a coat of arms.

      • Miserable:
        I hate to be the one to break this “news” to you:

        As a bone-fide, tax paying, businessman, you ARE Middle Class!

        Now, don’t forget to raise your little finger, whilst quaffing gravy😉👍

      • Let’s compromise and say Upper-Middle-Class.

        Les, now that you’re Middle-Class, you’ll have to stop pissing in the shower you know.

      • I’ll try Maggie but not making any promises!
        Where did you meet him by the way?
        If you see him again show him my nom!😁👍

      • Now you have moved up the social ladder, Miserable, remember us little people and don’t just do removals for Premier League footballers and actors from Corrie.

        Nice nom, amazing (or not) how many of these fuckers went to Oxbridge.

      • You will henceforth be known as Miserable Northern Quinoa with Goats Cheese and be banned from talking about your Barbour jacket or your Laura Ashley Curtains.

      • Im having Jerry and Margo round for a dinner party next Friday,
        Nibbles, few bottles of vino, etc
        Stick some Coldplay on?
        You chaps are welcome!

        No trainers please.

      • I can see you now, organising Bridge evenings, Tennis lessons, trading in your dog for a Labradoodle, getting Mrs Mis to host coffee mornings to raise money for Afghan refugee’s and marrying off Miss Mis to a chartered Acuntment named Rupert.

      • “rustic chips Petit pois and jus please Doreen!”

        Salt and vinegar?
        Is it organic sea salt?

      • I have a pair of hush puppies to go with my best track suit
        It’s going to be a great evening MNC so looking forward to it

      • “Rather funny”? Murray hides it well whenever he’s on TV then.
        I am hilarious, but I don’t expect to make a career out of it, but that’s where cronyism has clearly helped him out.
        IRL he’s anti-British, looney left liberal, woke remainer, and as is the way with those snowflake SJW types, intolerant to anyone who doesn’t echo their opinion.
        Like most people in the public eye, he still thinks the reason why the Remain campaign lost was due to patriotism/racism – so they bash anything British or patriotic, just to try to perpetuate a divide amongst British people. That’s pretty abhorrent.
        He’s a rebellious spoilt Oxford student, from the aristocracy. He mocked lad culture with his terrible Pub Landlord routine, and now sneers at the proud working-class British folk who voted to leave the EU. He’s never had to work a day in his life, such is his privileged, the snide hypocrite.
        The people he looks down on are high above this low-life, alky, cunt.

  13. If he did his pub landlord routine today it would Pimm’s No. 3 for man and Mojito for the ladies, a ‘proper’ job would be influencer 😂

  14. I’m a stand comedy connoisseur (ooh, big word!) and though Al Murray is kinda, sorta funny, I just can’t ever get fully behind a stand-up who does his act as a character with a mannered way of speaking. It detracts from the experience. A lot of comedians play an exaggerated version of themselves on stage, ie. Stewart Lee (“I’m not funny off stage”), Frankie Boyle (he’s a quiet, liberal-minded guy in real life), Larry David in Curb Your Enthusiasm (“I couldn’t say those things in real life”), but when a comedian uses an actual caricature to present their views on stage, I just find it tiresome, it wears thin after a while.

    As for Murray himself, he seems alright, but he might have aspects of cuntitude. I can’t square away a patriot who is pro-EU, is fine with the gremlins and gimps of Brussels interfering with out laws, lorries and lives.

  15. Murray is a flabby, flatulent fraudster, charlatan, and all-round general shitstain rolled into one.

    This fat, stinking, sneering, bogus cunt of a carcass is about as genuine as a Rolex purchased off a lucky-lucky man in Playa Das Americas.

    He’s less desirable than having a hot, steaming turd pressed into your nostrils.

    Terry, unfortunately this lard-arsed cunt is too obese to fit in one of your industrial sized ovens.

    Do us a favour Al, just fuck off and grab yourself a salad for everyone’s sake, including your own.

  16. I havent seen anything from him for years. The last i saw was a stand-up where his act was intimidating young lads in the front row.
    I dont bother with comedians who spend most of their time on stage berating the audience. They end up with bread rolls being thrown at them.

    • Don’t like the modern comedians myself
      They seem to be cunts
      Shouty cunts as well to demand everyone is onside with their routine
      The best comedians are laid back with delivery and timing that the jokes speak for themselves
      They could learn a lot from the old school CP

  17. I’ll watch his new programme on battles just to see if he really is an ultra, anti British cunt.
    Never really liked him, much preferred Micky Flanagan, Kevin Bridges, Geoff Norcot, Ricky Gervaise, Peter Kay and saw Jenny Éclair last night. She was fucking funny.

    • I like Flanagan and Bridges. Bridges talking about being fed ‘hoose rice’ (rice boiled at home) by a middle-class family who’d ordered a chinese takeaway was grat and Micky Flanagan’s bit on ‘How to Shop Well for Less’ is hilarious.

      ‘It tastes the same but it costs less!’

  18. Al Murray: Harry Hill’s Sidekick. Little brother Alan. I knew he had a degree in history but not that he was from small gentry.

    My best friend, whom I fell out with because his English wife hated me, said in 2008 he had been to see Al Murray, The Pub Landlord. I said, isn’t he a bit young for that role? He said he thinks he’ll grow into it. (He didn’t expect me to know who he was). I said he was Harry Hill’s sidekick and he said, “Oh yes, so he was!”. He was even in Harry Hill’s Fruit Fancies sitting in a deck chair. The mute cunt.

    So what compels him to be a standup comedian, presenter or actor rather than a historian? Money? No probably because he only has to work 3 hours a week rather than 37.5 hours.

    Crap joke:
    Q: What’s the difference between Harry Hill and Al Murray?
    A: Harry can self-medicate if he’s ill because he’s a non-practicing doctor!

  19. One trick pony who is flogging the arse off this dead horse of a show, what kind of prick would also want to watch this Fat pile of Horse shit live, I would suck tyres.!

  20. More remainer (still? Move on) English self-hating, divisive agenda from this unfunny alky cunt. He wasn’t even funny in his pathetic and unfamiliar portrayal of a ‘pub landlord’ – dressed in his old Oxford University blazer, for some bizarre reason. Is he on his 3rd divorce yet? Spoilt rich kid, rebelling from his aristocratic family. Cronyism is the only explanation how people are still employing the potato-headed cunt. He’s all about a remainer divisive English self-hating agenda that’s been non-stop since the referendum to leave the EU was announced – they still can’t accept it’s over. Murray and the media just want to get rich by making people full of hate and rage. Murray is an alcoholic spoilt rich kid, born with a silver spoon in his fat, unfunny potato face. His ancestors must be turning in their graves. Talentless slob. When he dies it’ll be the first time the cunt’s made me laugh.

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