Council “workers”

A cunting if I may for that most irritating of public servants, the council worker!,

often seen sat in their council vans sipping tea, smoking and glaring at their fucking IPhones, it’s rare to see these indolent cunts actually working, just down the road, these fuckers have so far spent 2 cunting weeks relaying 20 feet by 4 feet worth of tarmac,

the cunts have pretty much set up camp there, but you can guarantee that come 4pm the cunts are racing back to headquarters to punch their tickets, but not as quick as I’d be to sjambok these cunts if I had my way, lazy, fucking bone idle CUNTS!!!!!!!

Nominated by: Captain Quimson

32 thoughts on “Council “workers”

  1. Aye thats them at the top.
    Playing fuckin marbles when meant to be working.
    Just gyppos in hi-vis.
    At the moment every road in Cheshire has roadworks.
    None manned like, just roadworks.

  2. Near my work they put red lights up on the busiest road 3 days before they even began. They finished the work (resurfacing a bit of pavement) on the Thursday and left the traffic lights up with them not even being needed until the Tuesday because they couldn’t be fucked until then.

    I wouldn’t mind but there was ample room for them to park by the pavement on grass, but they didn’t want to do that.

  3. The street in front of my house has had so many potholes repaired over the years that the entirety of the pavement is a jumble of patches. FFS Repave the fucking street instead of revisiting after a heavy rain with a shovel full of asphalt to drop in the hole and step on it with your boot you overpaid apes!

  4. Roadworks are the bain of my fucking life. Over in Germany they don’t fuck about, they get in there get the job done sharpish then fuck off again.

    This country is a joke.

  5. I always wanted a job with the council.
    Taking all week to do something that should’ve taken a couple of hours, with the shoddiest result imaginable, all paid at a rate about four times the actual worth.
    Problem is I’m a straight, white, male, so I never made the short list.

  6. You see road works, you hardly ever, ever see the workers doing work. What is up with that?

    Also really annoying is that where I live there is never any advance warning when these road works are going to be set up and no info’ about how long they’re going to be there for. Fuckwittery.

  7. Council workers,
    As my old man used to say after any botched half arsed job “Mickey Mouse Tradesmen”

  8. They are a bunch of half jobbers.Please make some room in your oven please Unkle Terry for these lazy wankers

  9. Have noticed on my travels in recent years, that wherever a set of temporary traffic lights have been set up, you will probably see a Dark-Key sitting in his car, reading a newspaper (probably a guide to fleecing social services). This security detail is perfect for an indolent race.

  10. There’s a man I meet, walks up our street, a worker for the council, has been twenty years. ‘Dignity’ by Deacon Blue. Apparently he buys a boat with council wages and fucks off.

    • I was saying to Mrs Plastic how egregiously bad those lyrics were. She didn’t agree.I know why.
      She went to a concert of theirs and brought back a CD and T-shirt. Her generation see.
      So she has a mind to defend them.
      Also she doesn’t ever like to agree with me.
      Anyway the defence? ‘it is all a dream’. In the world if the lyrics its all a dream.
      That makes even worse for me.
      Having said when challenged she does admit ‘Real Gone Kid’ is as absolutely terrible.

      • ‘And you’re a real gone kid
        And maybe now baby (maybe now baby)
        Maybe now baby (maybe now baby)
        Maybe now baby (maybe now baby)
        I’ll do what I should have did

        Cause you’re a real gone kid’

        ‘I’ll do what I should have did’ ffs.

  11. Pikeys can lay tarmac at extraordinary speed, they always have some left over from a job. Much more economical than the council. Wonder if any cunt will take that seriously.

    • There’s always a catch with Pikeys and left over tarmac. I know a true story about a Transport firm near Heathrow. The boss’s son was in one Saturday and a couple of pikeys turned up offering to fill in some pot holes in the yard. A price was agreed of about £500 and it was done the following day. When the boss’s son turned up on Monday morning the whole yard had been done and about 5 pikeys were standing waiting to be paid a new fee of about 20 grand in cash. They said they knew where the boss, his son and the transport manager lived and would pay everyone a visit if they didn’t get their money. The boss spoke to them on the phone as his son and the transport manager were shitting themselves. He said to the ringleader that if if he knew where he lived to come round. Sure enough the pikeys turned up and wanted their money. It turns out that the boss asked the ringleader if he knew a certain someone, ringleader says yes a bit sheepishly, boss says he’s a personal friend and I can call him now if you like. Ringleader says sorry there’s been a misunderstanding and apologises, takes the original £500 and fucks off out the electric gated driveway never to bother the firm again.

  12. Council, work ! . Civil service,work!The cunts are supposed to work for us. When in actual fact we work for them, hence they can retire at 55.

  13. Bunch of indolent cunts. What they need is an overseer with a whip and a cat of nine tails. That would get them working.

    • Indolent cunts indeed
      Prerequisite skill set for these useless dolts appears to be scratching their bollocks , showing their arse cracks , leaning on tools , drinking tea , arriving late going early , Half day Mondays , half day Fridays and generally making a fucking pigs ear of any job they actually attempt No jobs too small ( to avoid)
      For these professional shirkers ……
      All this hopeless endeavour paid for by the tax payer……….

  14. Equally bad…..council garbage collectors. Lazy surly cunts. They take your bucket,you know the green fucking wheelie bin, and leave it 20 feet away from where they found it. If it isn’t in the bin they wont take it. And best of all you only get it collected every second week. Council workers, lazy overpaid cunts.

  15. Now the mayoral elections are imminent, watch these cunts appear and fill the holes in the road. Rest of the time we never see the fuckers.

  16. Indolent cunts indeed
    Prerequisite skill set for these useless dolts appears to be scratching their bollocks , showing their arse cracks , leaning on tools , drinking tea , arriving late going early , Half day Mondays , half day Fridays and generally making a fucking pigs ear of any job they actually attempt No jobs too small ( to avoid)
    For these professional shirkers ……
    All this hopeless endeavour paid for by the tax payer……….

  17. The binmen leave our bin so far away I need to get a fucking taxi to get it.
    Bunch of cunts too, whistling and being fucking jolly at 8 a.m.

    A kid says to his mate ….My dad’s a footballer and he can take a penalty, run to the goal and save it.
    His pal replies….My dad’s a council worker and he can go to work and be home before he’s due to start.

  18. The road between the two villages where i live has a 90dg dangerous blind bend on it, the local halfwit council workers had come along a week (a fucking week) before work was due to be started and planted traffic lights on it (no passing places on this particular road) how i laughed with delight when following plod up the road that he pulled up at the lights, got out and proceeded to turf all the fucking lights into the ditch beside the rd!! as he got back in his noddy car i gave him a round of applause and i could see a big grin on his face!! probably a proper old school plod.

  19. Council workers are paid a pittance.

    Particularly the manual workers.

    Pay peanuts and you get monkeys.

    The real wastes of space are in council offices, on good money too.

    Bin men are out at 6 in morning when most lazy private sector workers are still asleep.

    18k a year to empty up to 1600 bins in a day. I wouldn’t be over enthusiastic about it for that kind of money. Most folks wouldn’t get out of bed for that money.

  20. Sorry cunters I tried to put up a link to this vidio but technoligy has fucked me over again, so if you guys can be arsed,go on youtube, Council workers rainbow impression, it’s hysterical and sums up these worthless, workshy cunts to a tee.
    We are paying for these useless cunts to exist, doesn’t that make you feel great….

  21. A very valid nom in most respects but I would widen it out. It seems to me the problem is that the people spending the ratepayers money are insulated from the need to justify raising that money. Every year I receive a bill for thousands of pounds which I have to pay by law. I then watch the local authority pissing most of it away on all kinds of fuckwittery and hare-brained schemes some of which are not merely wasteful but actually screw the people who paid in these funds.
    Central government also deserve their reputation for waste and to me a more striking example in that area is the vanity projects. Olympic games anyone? I once worked in no. 1 Canada Square in Canary Wharf and from the forty-ninth floor looked down on the dome. A billion pounds? £1,000,000,000?! Oh come on!

  22. Ah, the hard working council road men.
    Staple monologue of that Welsh cunt Max Boyce.

    You can’t say they’re leaning on their spade any more because that’s waycist.

  23. We have the same lazy cunts on this side of the pond too working for various levels of local governments. We don’t call them Council Workers over here; I guess we just call them lazy fucking cunts. The only thing they’re good at is clocking 8 hours a day, but only putting in two hours of real work.

Comments are closed.