(A nice hole in one, to finish off April – DA)
Are intolerant useless Cunts.
Some time ago I cunted golfers. They are cunts I know I’m one. Now this cunting is for the middle aged hags that frequent golf courses up and down the country. Not the fit chicks that play the pofessional game.
They are :-
Useless as players, with the new handicap system they are allowed handicaps up to 60+ FFS you could score 60 over par walking round with a putter. I have pared our 18th hole using just a putter tee to cup.
Slow players hold everyone else up by being shit and taking a million shots and talking about their Tenna lady products. Have a whole hour mid morning (most popular time) especially for them only just to play.
Arrogant bastards always looking for an argument.
“A female golfer has been suspended and two others have resigned as members after becoming embroiled in a row in which a breastfeeding mother was told her actions were ‘putting them off their food’.”
Now I’m not big on tit feeding in public, but fuck me you can look the other way. This story just highlights their need for an argument.
They are spoilsport cunts and need to fuck off back to the kitchen.
Nominated by: Everyonesacunt
Why do women golfers feel the need to smack a ball into a hole with a stick?
Why don’t they just shove the balls and the sticks into their own holes?
Thank god these middle-aged golfing hags don’t play in the nude!
13
Whats your handicap?
Cleft palate and small cock.
Ive just got back from the golf course, (walking the dog)
Never see anyone who looks like her pictured!
All fat management cunts in funny jumpers.
I like golf courses, sledging in winter, had a shag on one, taken a shit on a few,
Theyre great.
Forgot my point now.
21
The woman above looks like she is momentarily distracted as you streak across the fairway Miserable. What, you’ve never seen a 6’8 bearded flasher being chased by golf club security before?
13
my mate regularly takes a shit where we play scruffy twat..
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Where does he take the shit?
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Bertram, he prefers the dikes, (ditches with water in them) bushes or even in a pint pot. I kid you not.. He is a cunt but a fucking hard one so best I say no more.
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MNC@ – Never mind that – I want to know who has photographed Miss busty out on the golf course with my putter in the nomination photo – the lying little mare told me she was off to meet a Man off the internet for sex!
Birds eh?..
8
You winning Foxy?
Business ok?
Hey, theyve adjusted the criteria for a SIESS grant so small business that missed out (you)
Can apply.
Better late than never?!
3
I had a shit in the little white cup one night when cutting across a golf-course to get back to where I was staying…I’d have loved to see the look on the face of the first Cunt to putt out on that particular hole the next day
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I dont know anything about golf except its a walk for old men and cunts with a stick. Women sport is hilarious. A load of comical shit,watched by no one, except for beach volley ball and jelly wrestling.
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In the near future the only way you will tell if its a man or a woman in the female jelly wrestling competition will be, one woman has a camel toe and the other “woman” has a cock.
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God she’s fit as fuck.
9
Been there.
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Excellent, have you any photos?
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Here’s another pic of the delightful lady in question.
https://cdn.golfmagic.com/styles/amp_1200/s3/field/image/paige-spiranac-masters-towel.png
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I do have a few photos but they seem to have stuck together.
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Mrs Brain’s comment; “She needs a bigger jacket”.
1
Times are hard when golf enters my topics of conversation. I never could work out why the Bush family launched two wars over it.
18
Once described as ” a good walk spoiled ” I think golf has to be one of the most annoying activities ever, and being stuck behind a slow moving four who haven’t the good manners to invite those behind them to play through is beyond the pale.
Not that I know anything about golf, at all.
Critising breastfeeding is a tricky subject. There are ways & means of finding a quiet, private place when out and about. Suggesting to a breast feeding mother they use the toilet would prompt me to suggest the complainer had their steak & chips served in there.
So, look the other way, those who disapprove , and ask the management for a quiet place, like the staff room, those who feed in public places.
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My point is women golfers really probably shouldn’t be criticizing other women. However, “women golfers” excel at being pompous fucking cunts without any thoughts for others..
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Everyonesacunt@
Have you ever played against one of these women?
And if so, did you beat her and did she show good sportsmanship in losing?
Or cry and storm off?
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I have played against a women and lost. She was the clubs golf pro. She also thought that most amateur golfers lacked social skills and the ability to allow quicker, not better, players through. Women, most of them, in a mainly male domain sadly fuck things up, because of a massive self righteous chip on their shoulder.
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Most women golfers are lesbians.
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Howd you know that Dick?
You don’t play golf do you?
3
Good Evening,Miserable.
I know that most of them are lesbians because I am a social member at my local club…and not once have I got as much as a gobble off any of the tarts…….obviously a coven of rug-munching clit-botherers.
22
Indeed, Dick.
When I walked the dog in my teens, female goffers resembled a cross between Rupert the Bear’s trizers and that old Toksvig bat.
3
Sorry, i’m with the lady golfers on this one. When I was a kid nobody lobbed their norks out in public. You only saw that on documentaries about primitive tribes in Umbongo land so why is it so necessary now? It may be “natural” ……..so is having a shit but you don’t do it in the fucking street!
And it’s not just breastfeeding. I’m sick of these slags strutting around like they’re the first cunts in history to pop out a brat. You see them on buses, trains and pavements acting like they own the place just because they have managed to reproduce themselves. I wouldn’t mind but i’m paying for the little bastards and I didn’t get any of the pussy! These sluts should stay at home and look after the brats. Why are you taking a baby to a golf club in the first fucking place?
13
The soft spots on their heads act as good golf tees.
5
Freddie, I refer you to my earlier comment. It’s not necessary to make a public show when breastfeeding. It can be done discreetly.
Me and my other were traveling to Inverness to visit family. We had my first born with us. We stopped at a cafe and deliberately parked at the farthest corner. My partner put a towel in the window, anchored by the wind up handle to feed the baby.
A couple arrived and parked near the cafe & some old hag deliberately walked down the car park to peer through the windscreen.
You can imagine my fucking outrage when we entered the cafe to find this hag whining about the ” disgusting ” sight she’d seen.
She got some gob, & I got a round of applause from everyone in the place.
Fuck old bags, they’re annoyed no ones sucking their nips!
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Well cunted Mr Priest👍
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Well cunted. Too many want to make a spectacle of it. The ones speaking out are 24 stone feminists who couldnt get a bloke to jizz down their pit if they tried and are two fat for ivf. Imagine peeling one of those cheese toastie minges open, or blokes pretending they were looking out of ‘disgust’ rather than being humble enough to admit they are just perving, or barren old hags whos reproductive system broke down over half their life ago. Fuck them all
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Paige Spiranac. What a specimen. Natalie Gulbis isn’t bad as well. Dame Laura Davies, brave man taking that on.
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Holy fuck DA!! What an incredible sight! Where can I join?!
The reality in the U.K. is some red-cheeked, 15 stone munter wearing shapeless, day-glo weatherproofs and check trousers ; zig-zagging for an eternity all the way from from1-18.
9
Get stuck behind a women’s golf society on the course and say goodbye to your day.
They are shite and they refuse to let you play through.
Some of the professional women golfers are fit, but most can’t play to the required standard.
There was a clear out of sub standard women golfers from the LPGA some years ago.
I play golf to get away from Mrs Cunter.
I don’t want to see split arses on the course.
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Ditto
3
they refuse to let you play through. its because they are women, have you ever been behind someone in a line at a supermarket checkout with one item and they have a full trolley. if its a bloke there is a chance he will let you go first, if a women then you have no fucking chance, the cunts
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Just because it’s called, “the wicked game” doesn’t mean witches are welcome! Ba-dum-tss!
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My compliments to Admin in their selection of a most appropriate and very stimulating picture of a young attractive and eminently fuckable bunny gazing down a “Hole” ( how appropriate )
I will pass comment a little later when my erection has waned….
5
I watched a bit of snooker today (I know it isn’t golf but it’s got balls that end up in a hole), there will be two wiminiz shoehorned into the men’s tour (or whatever the fuck they call it) next season, whenever that is.
Just go through the normal way to get in, if you are good enough then play otherwise Fuck off.
Sports like Darts, Snooker and Golf don’t need to have men and women split, it’s skill not brawn
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I’ve wondered about that for a few years – why is darts not mixed? It’s a zero-contact parlour game. Snooker too. Golf is a bit different as the power of your drive is very important, but can the best women not hit a wee ball as hard as the men?
Many sports are in danger of jumping the shark in this deadly decadent decade. All things awesome eventually turn to shit. Entropy, boys and girls, entropy.
3
I did watch a bit of women’s golf, just for the sport not to check if any are worth shagging 😂
There is one little slitty eye Mi Hiang Lee absolutely fucking yummy
They seem to hit the little ball a fair old distance and form what (little) I know about golf the ball travels as far as the club allows and it doesn’t matter if some big chunky bloke hits it 350 yards if it ends up in a bush and has to hack it out, power advantage gone straight away.
Anyway if they want to hit it further, get down the gym and beef up 😂
Do trannies play golf?
7
Nice picture Admin, I was so distracted I didn’t read the cunting. I’ll have a wank, read it and then come back.
Go fuck yourselves.
9
Not up to my standard. Flabby dimpled thighs, silicone tits and a peaked cap to hide her eye bags and wrinkles. Come on DA, show us something decent.
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You have extremely high standards Allan. I’m not too fussy at the best of times, especially now.
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Is there any sport that women actually enhance? Tit’s and arses aside (volleyball etc) women are fucking shit at sport and should stick to cake baking completions.
Go fuck yourselves.
11
Evening Black and White.
I’ve noticed that the sports reporting on BBC and SKY has started mentioning women’s football without saying whether it’s the men’s or women’s game.
This is fuckin’ underhand and quite deliberate.
There’s a deliberate plan to ride the women’s on the back of the men’s game.
Women’s football – a twattish game run by twats.
11
Evening Bertie, I agree. I fear we are heading for a mixed gender league and a tranny division.
It was disappointing we signed up for that European super League bollocks wasn’t it. Football is all money these days.
4
I could just imagine Tranmere Rovers playing in the Tranny Division!
Welcome to Preop Park – home of the first transitioning football team.
6
Mud wrestling!
But seriously… it’s all about how legitimately something can be hyped. Boxing used to be popular with EVERYBODY from the 1950s until Mike Tyson bit Hollyfield’s ear. Almost every TV on Earth was tuned into see the Ali fights in the 1970s because they were justifiably hyped to the Heavens and did not disappoint. But now EVERY major sports event is hyped like it’s the Rumble in the Jungle and then it disappoints even when its good. So how do you hype women’s football? It should be easy enough, but it isn’t, as deep down, folk just know it isn’t going to be amazing, it’s going to be okay-ish just like most men’s football matches. Maybe one day there will be a West Germany v France 1982 World Cup Semi-Final, but I doubt it.
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Ice Skating, Show Jumping and Gymnastics 🙂
4
Firing ping pong balls from the snatch…..
Is that a sport? 😂
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Evening B&W👍
I hear some Asian laydees have enhanced Table tennis.
Although like you, I know “naffink abaaht it!”
🤔
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Evening CG, I am far too gentlemanly to know anyfink abaaaaaht anyfink like that. 😁
9
My favourite golfing joke.
.Three women playing golf, On the first tee one of them points to a nearby house with a pool and landscaping. See that house she says, it’s mine, my husband is a barrister.
Next tee the second woman points to another mansion and claims it’s hers and hubby is a banker.
On the third tee the third woman says, My husband can balance 12 budgies on his cock. Seemingly shocking the other two.
They finish the round and back in the clubhouse the first woman states, That wasn’t my house, I live in a terraced and my fella is a brickie.
Second one then admits her hubby is a plumber and they live in a semi.
Finally the third one says…
Well if we’re all being honest the last budgie has to stand on one leg
16
I don’t mind a game of crazy golf but have Never been interested in the full golf game, takes to long. Mind you if there were more tarts on the course who looked like the bint in the picture I may just take it up. There’s plenty of places on a course when I could go and have a crafty wank.
5
A woman playing a round of golf and has not long set off gets stung by a bee.
She rushes into the pro shop and says “I’ve been stung by a bee! I’ve been stung by a bee!
The pro asks “Where?”
The woman says “Between the first and second hole.”
The pro thinks about it then says … “Then your stance is too wide.”
16
Golf etiquette dictates that if you are slower than players following you let them play through – common sense and good manners.
Women golfers do not seem to understand this rule and I always make sure I am off first if there are Women playing – they appear to have no concept of “get a fucking move on”!
18 holes of golf should take no more than four hours max, madly frustrating waiting behind people who are dithering, chatting and socialising.
Golf is kind of a Marmite thing, but walking around paradise in the fresh air and countryside for 15 quid is unbeatable – I taught myself from a book because I am a skinflint who refuses to pay for lessons! 😀👍
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Being a good Yorkshireman, Vernon, I thought you were going to say you practised with a length of drainpipe and some balled up newspaper before parting with hard earned cash.
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LL@ – Wasting hard earned on a length of drainpipe?
I would never be so profligate! 😀
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LL, thank you. Best laugh of the day award to you.
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Vern – don’t worry. This is a common complaint that men hurry everything. It’s just a way of ladies encouraging you to take more time in the bedroom department. My games improved tremendously by slowing down my stroke.
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Is golf so fancy that the wimmin can’t be told to go inside at once and make bacon sandwiches?
I despair.
3
The lady golfer in the picture is one Paige Spiranac. The words bang like a shithouse door in a gale come tomind.
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She’s that hot, her putter’s melted near the end.
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Most of them are dykes on spikes Boring as bat shit to watch on tv. But i would not mind a hole in one with Natalie Gublis.
3
60 over par?
Not bad. I’ve only played a few times. Bought a set of clubs about 10 years ago in an attempt to start a new hobby.
I came to the conclusion after a couple of rounds that hitting the ball sweetly with a 2 or 3 iron was a physical impossibility, and that anyone who can do it must have sacrificed a child to the devil.
I must’ve been 75 over par in my first effort. Maybe 70 over on my second and there was never a third, as I didn’t find getting frustrated and laughed at to be enjoyable.
Golfers who can play well are devil worshippers and dark wizards.
7
WOMEN GOLFERS:
Crap at driving,
Great with an iron.
7
The only time you would find me on a golf course, is lamping pesky leverets👍
3
Sounds like a militant rug muncher with a Turkey Baster Brat who has no qualms about getting her tired old dugs out in a public eatery to feed the sprog because she hopes it will cause a row.
For the record having a wank is also natural but the last time I got my old fella out in a restaurant for a cheeky tug I got arrested and put on the sex-offenders register for 10 years.
What else are you supposed to do while waiting for the desert menu?.
Clear evidence there is one rule for them and one rule for us.
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Naga munchettey is a Golfer. Say no more.
2
Used to play off about 12 handicap. Not brilliant but acceptable.
Once accepted an invitation to play with one of my mothers friends at her club. One hole had a blind second shot, over the river Roding which had high banks either side, the green the other side of the river.
Asked which club I should take and was informed that a 3 iron would be about right. Hit a perfect 3 iron, only to find that I had overshot the green by around 80 yards.
Disappointing that say the least.
3