Right having spent a large chunk of Christmas on my fat arse watching TV I’ve decided daytime tv is a cunt.
Why?
Death.
It should be called DeathTV.
Every fucking commercial advertises funeral plans and tells you about your mortality . Constantly being told that if you’re over 40 or 50 it’s time to dig a hole and jump in gets tiresome to say the least.
Now I know we will all kick it but ramming it down our throats every time there’s a break in the show I’m watching is really getting in my tits.
Whatever happened to advertising chocolate or soft drinks or women’s underwear ?
Daytime TV you’re a cunt.
Nominated by: Uttercunt
Read a book.
Go for a walk.
Have a wank.
45
Not necessarily simultaneously.
14
Now that would be impressive, dress as a garden gnome while you’re at it.
12
Agree with cunts mate cunt but, in reverse order if I go for a walk first don’t have the energy for a wank…and sack the telly off for good. So called live tv is shite. Did away with it and the tax some years ago fuck em.
30
Talkradio for me between 0800hrs and 1600hrs. Everything else is libtard lefty shite propaganda cunt. Then onto Netfucks or Prime, then bed, sleep, repeat with the occasional five knuckle shuffle with Julia Hartley-Brewer when the missus is busy.
18
You’d have to be dead or almost dead to watch daytime TV.
Programmes made by cunts for cunts, watched by cunts.
23
Indeed. If my TV is on before the watershed then it’s been stolen.
7
I never watch live TV anyway, apart from occasional dip into the 24 hour News channels and Parliament channel.
The few things I do choose to watch I record and cut out the adverts and/or trailers prior to viewing.
5
That said, Judge Judy is a favourite programme of mine. I like to watch it while having breakfast.
JJ for President!
Make America Sane Again!
11
Don’t we have a Judge ‘Rimmer’? I tune in occasionally in the hope of seeing Miserable on the hook for stealing washing off his neighbours line or Fiddler in a land boundary dispute.
8
I remember there was some gay judge on ChavTV. I don’t think his name was Rimmer but I am sure he was into rimming.
2
Judge Rimmer is a pale imitation, LL.
Though I have no doubt MNC is “up” before him on a regular basis.
2
Correct, HBC, he also goes by the name of Rinder.
Below is one of MNC’s many appearances before the judge:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=23KTFcbN-zo
Nice earrings Miserable. 🤣
2
Ahh now come RTC, what was wrong with Jeremy Kyle?
1
Stay at home, watch TV, be afraid, die. Live the dream, avoid Covid-19.
23
Endless repeats of shite filled to the brim with commercials for gambling, old cunt stuff and those rip off schemes when someone buys your house and gives you some magic beans for it.
I would rather get caught in the gears of a combine than watch it.
18
And those funeral plan ads are so natural aren’t they?
Oldies swanning around blabbing about how brilliant their insurance company is. Big smiles. Those sunlife ads with the dotty neighbour beaming away at the thought of her own demise. Or supertart Carole Vorderman pimping more money out of the Great British public.
But hey our spirits are lifted by the towering intellects of the likes of Philip Schofield and Jeremy Vine, the housewives favourites.
At least we are spared the other Jeremy and his moronic clientele.
18
Vorderman in her ads seriously looks like a monster…she’s been taking some intense ugly lessons.
19
I can’t stand Ron Jeremy either.
11
I’m surprised anyone can tell the difference between any time zone for TV programming (hint).
Kill your television, it’s all shite.
29
Sun Life, ‘do it for the family’ 😂
11
“Do it NOW!!”
Wasn’t that one done to death?
Have totally forgotten what it was for… Incompetent sphincter?
0
Same on you tube, fucking funeral plans. When you gotta go, you gotta go. Won’t bother you, let some other cunt worry about it.
7
All I ever get on Jew Tube is fucking Asana…what ever the fuck that is…some kind of cheap MS Project clone I think.
5
I get loads of those Grammerly ads on YouTube narrated by some seppo slapper from a country that can’t spell properly.
5
Considering that daytime tv is 99.99999% aimed at wimminz, I’m amazed there has been no backlash from them. From what I can see, all women over 40 constantly piss themselves, disproportionately suffer from headaches, openly discuss their periods and like nothing more than talking to their retarded husband’s about funeral arrangements. Surely that’s not truly representative?
Having said that……
14
Also. At the dawn of multi channel tv I remember itv and channel 4 screaming that they would lose out on advertising revenue. But there have never been so many ads as there are today.
11
I havent watched the Telly in its ‘traditional’ form since 2016 thanks mainly to the BBC and it’s anti white British stance and very biased news.
Cancelled my license and I haven’t paid or watched it since so I don’t get any of the coffin dodging adverts.
Subscription services like Amazon prime and Netflix have their faults but on the whole I don’t have to endure a load of shit adverts, bias news.
I also watch what I want when I want to, not when some cunt at the Beeb tells me I have to.
13
My TV viewing is now very limited. The Chase, Who Wants to be a Millionaire, Endeavour, Wheeler Dealers and classic TV such as the Professionals, the Persuaders, Randall and Hopkirk and the Saint on ITV4.
The rest is monkey’s ballbags.
13
Good choices. The Saint , when men dressed properly and women were devoid of tramp stamps.
11
Don#t forget the lovely Mrs Peel and Mr Steed on The Avengers on ITV4 each afternoon about 1545 – what a beautiful woman Diana Rigg was in 1967.
11
Bang on Mr M.
Those old action-adventure series are so good. They make me feel nostalgic for a simpler age when a pandemic would be no more than a somewhat far fetched plot about a diabolical mastermind. The Avengers with the suave Steed and incomparable Emma. Great sports cars roaring around empty roads. Happy days.
Now do I choose Royal London or British Seniors?
So difficult to decide.
11
Sometimes there’s a good film on Talking Pictures but the rest of it can get fucked. I love the death adverts where the old couple are mixed race, It’s about time the white women in their 70s and their black husbands were represented on TV.
11
What annoys me are those gabby old tarts, old men who look as if they don’t know where their next truss is coming from, and verbose dark keys all badgering each other in parks and swimming pools going on about their policies, and the other one where some nosy old trollop bursts into an old buggers kitchen to more or less say she has intercepted his post – she knows his new policy has come. I suspect a murder is about to be committed.
When it’s not funeral plans, it’s false teeth fixture stuff and old tarts being cruellyt abused with their “up walkers”
11
Those UpWalkers are wicked, man.
Do you see those cats scooting around on them?
Those Dormeo mattresses look comfy too and do you know they are half price right now?
6
Lord Helpuss, that upwalker looks good.
Better than those older style with having to hunch over.
I had look on their website. £399.00 cor! I wonder if there will be concessions if I mention ISAC website. 🙂
3
That tears it, dvds from now on . The fucking things are on in the evening as well. What happened to Leonard rossiter advertising booze with Joan Collins or the milk tray bloke fending off sharks?
3
Fuck the telly.
Become a Pirate!
6
I’m not moving to Somalia for any amount of gold UT.
5
I wonder, is there an ISAC funeral plan? What is included? Do I recieve a free pen just for enquiring?
I don’t understand funeral costs. I thought once you’re dead that’s it. No point worrying about it.
8
You have to pay some bung to Matt Wankoff before RIP is allowed… It’s cheaper if you say you’ve got the lurgy.
0
That daft old cunt Joan keeps “popping round” to see the old cunt next door, only for him to go on about over 50s life insurance. For goodness sake man, can’t you see she’s coming round for a good seeing to while your missus is out. Daft cunt.
7
Yeah but why does he need new binoculars?
To keep an eye on his parsnip patch? His wife turns them into jam you know.
Hmmm. Delicious.
3
Look on the positive side. If you sign up to one of those funeral plans you get a free ball point pen. Got to be worth it.
4
Netflix is going the way of the BBC via films and series to I’m afraid. Daughter puts a new child’s series on the other day about a posh riding school, first 5 minutes I’ve got a young peaceful, 3 BLM activists, 1 ginger and a Transformer on the screen… I dropped my fucking tea…. Cunts.
6