Tell the story again. The mobile broke on the telly downstairs. An opportunity to get rid. Mrs Plastic can watch her rubbish upstairs.

Decided also to leave the radio on Classic FM. Trouble is we often have a late dinner. And I often sit down with it just in time.

Just in time for John fucking Suchet and his beloved Beethoven. ‘Beethoven the Man Revealed’ 2 fucking hours it is from 7 to 9. Just when you desperately want music to calm the nerves and wind down to all you have is Ludwig’s crash, bang, walloping.
The deafness he suffered, the struggles he endured. He loves all that does John.

What is it about him….? Its just so pom de pom de pom… the melodies do nothing for me. They don’t go anywhere. He wrote the ‘Pastoral Symphony’ but it doesn’t evoke the pastoral for me. He doesn’t evoke anything for me. Its just the violins working off a phrase but it doesn’t build to anything. Not like say in Mozart. The ‘movement’ is always circular with Beethoven -round and round then it will abruptly end.

Is he supposed to be Romantic? There’s nothing touching in it. It’s all too big and thrusting (his music that is). I’ve got to say I don’t even care for the famous Fifth Symphony. DA DA DA DAAAAH DA DA DA DA DAAAAH.

Don’t bother.

I like lush orchestral work like Vaughan Williams. Something as I say to calm the nerves. Or choral works, religious works to sooth the spirit.

This isn’t anti German. I’ve really grown to appreciate Bach. There’s a sprightly rhythm to his stuff. I love Mozart. Russian music, European Classical music really. But it’s this cunt at the centre I don’t relate to.

Also he gave the EU it’s anthem so he’s a cunt by default.

Nominated by: Miles Plastic 

(Never fear: the woke will revise history and show he was a person of colour – DA)
The Pastoral Symphony is an absolutely beautiful piece of music. The end. – NA