Coronavirus (or, how I learnt to stop living and love big state tyranny)

As the Coronavirus thread is all but dead I think it’s time we had a new go at the ultimate hand-wringing experience to come our way, certainly in my many years on the planet.

Firstly, I DO think it exists, it IS dangerous to certain people in society and I do not think this is some fake virus that will allow Bill Gates to inject us all with Windows 98 (SE)

I do however think this is the biggest fraud I have ever seen in my life, sure you can die from it but I could die from pricking my finger while gardening, some drunk hitting me in my car or a multitude of other ways to croak.

The present government (and the world) have gone stir crazy…madder than shit-house rats. They can get away with it by blaming the advice of “experts” while said experts are drawing a huge salary courtesy of the tax payer.

Do I know anyone who has died from it? Do I fuck.

Do I know anyone who has had it? Well, the guy in the Ford dealership who service my car claims that his mates best friends mum had it…she was probably drunk on Vodcat though.

Do I know anyone who has been made redundant from the whole mess? Yes, quite a few actually.

Have I heard the stories on the radio of cancer patients who have now died because the hospitals closed down to allow the nurses to dance on TicTok? Yes I have.

Have I read about all the depression, the alcohol dependents, the people who have lost their businesses because of the over-reaction? Yes I have.

So I hand it to you, the biggest fuck up ever, invented but the Chinese and mis-handled by ever other country in the world.

Nominated by Spanky McSpank

88 thoughts on “Coronavirus (or, how I learnt to stop living and love big state tyranny)

    • He has a friend who had it, died and then came back life…..

      Seriously he couldn’t wait to announce that his patch had been hit because the government is racist and only black people are effected.

    • Lammys dear friends hobby whilst in lockdown at Grenfell Towers was “Electrical repairs for beginners”.
      There were teething troubles.

  1. It’s bollocks, it exists but the response is way out of proportion to the problem.

    It’s like starting WW3 because a Russian dog pissed on an American flag.

  2. The government is rumoured to want to raise taxes to pay for the monumental debt the country finds itself in after spunking billions on propping up the economy and paying furloughed workers to ponce about at home for months on end.

    I don’t understand why we just don’t send a big fucking bill to the Dinks. This flu wasn’t of our making, but we’re suffering because of it (not helped by a wank government and its useless “experts” muddying the already polluted waters).

    We live in legitious times. “Had an accident? Not your fault? Then let’s sue the bastards – no win: no fee !”

    And the government really have to draw a line on this lockdown shite because unfortunately it is never going to go away. Just accept it and move on otherwise the country will be well and truly fucked, if it isn’t already!

    • We owe hundreds of billions of pounds to the Dinks.

      That amount comprises a large proportion of our two trillion pound National Debt.

      We should extract the cost of Coronavirus from what we owe them.

      • Perhaps this is their way of getting revenge on bad national debtors, not least the UK and the US. Cripple Western economies, use lockdown to keep people under a variation of house-arrest, kill a few hundred thousand at the same time, and then pretend nothing happened and carry on trading our cheap tat with the rest of the world!

      • Neither we nor the US are bad debtors. We’ve never defaulted on our debts and we pay out over £50 billion per annum in interest payments alone!

        Besides, it doesn’t make sense for the Chinks to cripple their lucrative Western markets which comprise their largest consumer demographic.

      • Not exactly good business acumen on the part of the Chinks. Lucrative companies don’t remain lucrative for very long in crippled economies. Ask Richard Tice.

  3. When it first kicked off, no one knew how dangerous it was going to be and most governments quite rightly took drastic measures.
    Now, a few months down the line it appears no worse than the flu.
    It’s as if they are denying to themselves the monumental firk-up they’ve made by continuing the charade to justify their actions.

  4. Less than 0.1% death due to Covid
    If you had 99.9% of making it through the day, you’d snap their hand off.
    It’s tough shit on the 0.1% though

  5. Well the government was successful in scaring everyone to stay at home. Too successful, because so many Karens, children of Karen’s, office workers, self obsessed cunts who are “shielding”, shit themselves at the thought life has to start again. School teachers are especially fragile flowers in this – they are all pissing their bloomers at the thought of actually having to WORK again.

    Meanwhile self important broadcasters sound ever more upset when they have to announce the daily “death toll” is lowering all the time (except in Scotland apparently).

    The BBC especially has used Coronavirus to “prove” how essential they are – every programme now has some reference to it.

  6. Apparently some of those Jocks who ignored the lockdown rules and were seen sunbathing recently, have now tested positive for hypothermia….

    • Apparently some were even seen with the hoods of their duffle coats down, but this may be an urban myth…

  7. The measures we have taken to combat it will ultimately end up killing more people than the virus itself. Yes it is dangerous to tue elderly and infirm but there’s no reason why they couldn’t have been shielded in tandem with a herd immunity approach.

  8. I still can’t believe how little the Chinese government is being taken to task for thier role in all of this. The Rinky Dinks are repulsive spunkstains on humanity’s shorts. The worst of tyranny, animal cruelty and pollution all rolled into one shifty, slanty eyed, buck teethed 4’10 package complete with a free congenital disorder.

    I have never seen a people so feckless and greedy that they will make the space they live in barely fit for human habitation. Why bother installing safety measures on that Nuclear reactor? That will just cost money and even if it melts down, someone might get a superpower! Why waste money on making those buildings structurally sound? If they fall over and crush your fellow countrymen then less mouths to feed!

    The only Chinese i like to hear is “Ding dong eggflied lice” otherwise abort the country with napalm.

    • Problem is, what can anyone do….

      It’s like Israel when they go into Gaza to sort out the cunts throwing rockets… everyone is Oh, that’s so bad, can’t do that, bla bla. Israel carries on until they have done what they need to do and then pull out.
      Russia take over Crimea , lots of arm waving but makes no difference.
      China lock up Muslims to be re-educated, because they can. Impose restrictions and laws in Hong Kong because they can.
      Proxy war in Yemen, until one side quits it will go on.

      Governments can shout and scream and eject diplomats but not much else

    • Pity the XR, Animal Rights, BLMs and Vegans and other assorted Woke cunts don’t fuck off over there and see how they get on demonstrated in the streets of Beijing and Tiananmen Square!

      You don’t see many dark-keys in China do you? So much for diversity and racial harmony et al. Am surprised Labour, the LibDumbs and the BBC haven’t spoken up about how racist the Chinese really are!

  9. Something very dark behind all of this. World panic, national lockdowns, more restrictions than in wartime.
    We are being played – get everything slowly re-opened whilst observing sensible precautions.
    I don’t believe a word those “in charge” tell me, and Boris the narcoleptic traitor needs to send a serious bill to China – we are a huge importer of their tat and slamming sanctions and tariffs on them until they either cough up or write off what we owe them will show we mean business.
    But we all know the spineless snake we have in nominal power won’t do that – Boris is rapidly gaining the title “Most useless fucking PM ever”.
    We are mushrooms – kept in the dark and fed on shit, believe nothing, trust no one – we are being played.

  10. On a world/national level it appears to be not too bad (sweeping statement) but on a personal level it is quite scary for many people and you cannot blame them for that.
    It doesn’t help when the government do what they think is right and all you hear in the media from the opposition (legitimate) and every other cunt who wants to throw in their two pennies (not legitimate) too soon, too late, not enough, too much.
    For fuck sake just let them get on with it, it’s down to manageable levels now and everyone should start getting back to normal, masks in confined spaces is fine other than that just basic fucking hygiene.

    I put in a nom about cunts full of themselves and wearing masks, pisses me right off ‘exemptions’ get to fuck. (Due to be published very soon! – DA)

    • Masks mean “I submit, I believe the government lies, control me, dominate me”.
      I’m one of those “full of themselves” cunts you mention. I’ll never wear a mask and anyone who does is a spineless pussy.

      • I have made a somewhat bizarre and frightening Lone Ranger mask TtCE – it scares the neighbours a treat! 👍😁

      • The government will be suggesting we wear burkas next (as part of the woke diversity campaign etc.)

      • I feel the same way about being made to wear a helmet on building sites, crash helmets on motorbikes and seat belts in cars. Government tyranny on steroids!

      • That should be a personal choice too RTC. Let people do what they like
        knowing the risks and if they get killed then it’s their responsibility.

      • Building sites are a workplace and if someone was killed with a spanner falling on their head not wearing a helmet the company would be liable if their policy was, well wear one if you feel like it.

      • If a building site had a policy of “wear one if you feel like it” it would be liable to prosecution by Government decree, regardless of whether a spanner fell on someone’s head or not.

      • Yes, I should’ve mentioned that I wasn’t including building sites in that by nature of being private businesses.

      • My mask means, “This fucking thing doesn’t make me any less likely to catch the plague but it may protect you if I’m infected and symptomless.”
        Which may be true or not, but I’ll stick with it until the guidelines change. Which is pretty damn nice of me, no?

        PS Being a fat cunt makes you twice as likely to die of the plague and will reduce the effectiveness of any vaccine should one appear. If you are severely obese and wind up in intensive care (forming 50% of patients in that happy state), you are virtually certain to need a ventilator, and all that implies.

        Eat less or be a cunt.

      • “But it’s my right to be a fat cunt! Don’t fat-shame me, you bigot!” will be the usual chorus of disapproval from the usual suspects

      • I see it as more about a token effort, you don’t have to any kind of medical magician to know that

        ‘Coughs and Colds spread diseases catch it in a tissue’

        Remember that one.

        If you are nose to nose in a tube or bus and some cunt is breathing on you it may be more reassuring if that person has a FUCKING MASK OVER THEIR MOUTH AND NOSE.
        It should be compulsory regardless of bat flu with all the shit we have imported carrying all sorts of fucking disease.

    • What a shockingly bigoted comment. Some people can’t wear masks due to disabilities or health conditions you big government loving cunt. Fuck off.

      • Bollocks…. the cunts I have seen not wearing masks have fuck all wrong with them that would prevent wearing masks, I’ve got an exemption , well fuck off then!

      • I have asthma; how would be able to see that? Are you qualified to diagnose whether or not someone has anything wrong with them? I highly doubt it.

      • So why does asthma stop you wearing a mask, and if you can’t wear a mask wear a face visor that covers nose and mouth, you see lots of people using that method particularly in shops and restaurants

        How many genuine cases are there compared to the cunts who just don’t want to wear a mask and don’t give a fuck about anyone else.

      • How or why would having asthma make you not want to wear a face muzzle and compromise ones oxygen intake??

        Is that a serious question.?

        Considering we have been force fed an avalanche of lies, half truths and outright fear porn for 6 months over a politically hijacked cold bug then I would say face muzzles and the fascistic types enforcing them are nothing more than subservient government stooges shithouses.

      • I have had asthma for 60 years. I can assure everyone it is easier the breathe though a cloth mask then a ventilator..

      • A very pretentious article in the Spectator this week suggests that designer masks as worn by rich cunts, and made from printed cotton, let a lot less air through than the cheapo common medical-style ones you get in Boots. With which I have no problem, (without asthma) beyond my glasses steaming up which is admittedly a cunt..

      • For Herman, from
        “ Most people with asthma, even if it’s severe, can manage to wear a face mask for a short period of time, and shouldn’t worry if they need to wear one. Wearing a mask does not reduce a person’s oxygen supply or cause a build-up of carbon dioxide. You may have read stories that say that it can, but this isn’t true.”

      • There are definitely people who take the piss but the majority of exemptions are legitimate. And even face visors are too much to bear depending on the disability- my brother has severe autism and he won’t even wear a hat let alone a mask or visor.

      • I would agree that there are those who take the piss but they are the majority rather than minority, yes I know there are certain conditions that prevent wearing a mask or visor but not that many and not that many who would be out and about in rush hour.

      • I’m not so sure. Cynical cunt though I am I still have some faith in humanity and I don’t think most people would stoop to that kind of low. Oh, apologies for kicking off btw.

      • I was joking, physical disability isn’t the social repulsion it was back in the days of JM.

        Kicking off is not a sin, don’t worry about it,

        Re your brother, I guess that if he wouldn’t be comfortable with any type of mask he would probably be less comfortable fighting his way onto a packed tube train

  11. Enforced vaccinations, a vaccine passport, no passport no entering shops, no employment, social credit scores, total facial recognition coverage, UN control of every nations health systems.

    All the above and more have been mooted off the back of the pandemic.

    The Chinese system deployed world wide.

    Bill Gates attempted to cut the man he started MS with when the guy was diagnosed with cancer. Thousands have died due to gates vaccine programs in the 3rd world. In the US vaccine companies are immune from lawsuits against them due to side effects or deaths due to their vaccines.

    Covid 19 is an excuse to implement tyranny in a global scale in the same way the twin towers were used to
    Implement already planned invasions of Afghanistan and Iraq.

    • Gates is one of those overweening cunts who thinks just because he has money he has the power to meddle in everyones lives, and knows everything there is to know about everything – the same problem Dickhead Branson and Anthony Blair suffer from. The truth is with or without money they are as dim as a glow-worms armpit

  12. 99.9% of people are still alive – who needs a fucking vaccine from anybody?
    Johnson and Co can fuck right off – the people have to fight the tyranny before we are all doomed – we need to burn their houses down now (with them in it)

    • That’s your choice, I will take a vaccine when it’s available, I have a flu vaccine every year and with good reason

      I have only had real flu on two occasions and both time the Flu was fine I could cope with it but both times I got secondary bacterial infections which required antibiotics, so avoid flu isn’t just about avoiding flu it what comes with it.

      Covid 19 may or may not fuck you up but if it does it can fuck you up completely.

      And why would you not want to have a vaccine

      • I’ve never had flu in my life, don’t know why because I seem to have had just about everything else, but I get a flu jab every autumn. I’ve had the pneumonia jab and the shingles jab. Doctors know a lot more than me so I take their advice.

      • Well, for one it will have been rushed out far quicker than the average vaccine development time (10 years give or take). Personally I wouldn’t be opposed to having one but I want to wait and see that it’s safe first and doesn’t have any nasty side effects.

      • I don’t think speed will be an issue, like any other vaccine it will need to work and be proven to work or there is no point, the difference here is that there lots of trials going in at the same time but all will still have to follow the same route to glory…

        Does it work
        Is it safe

      • “Rushed” suggests they might be cutting corners, but I’d be surprised if they’d be able to get away with doing that, even if they wanted to. Unless they were working for Putin, of course.

        But it is being fast tracked. I’m with you General, I would take it under the provisos you outlined.

  13. My brother had it. Thankfully he lived, he was on oxygen in hospital for a week and close to needing a ventilator. We were shitting ourselves. He’s in the mend but not right, this was in April. The dirty fucking Chinese need boning over by the rest of the world. We all know that won’t happen sadly. They are now exploiting the nations they gave it to by selling all the fucking ppi and sanitiser we now need. Cunts, they will get stronger at our expense. Double cunts.

  14. My mate has just admitted that he lost his job at the start of the lockdown but went out the door each morning as though nothing had changed, as he managed to find a job as a part time mime artist.
    I said, “Fuck me, you kept that quiet”….

  15. I won’t wear a mask as it would deprive all the women of the thrill of looking at such a dashing man, I also don’t think Covid will bother with me as it knows to take me aaaaht the gene pool would be a great loss to mankind and progression.
    Nah better it’s gets some fat cunt whose sits at home all day, contributing naffink to society.
    Go fuck yourselves.

  16. As ever the completely clueless just took scientific guesses as gospel and shat themselves.
    Didn’t the Imperial College state half a million could die?
    It’s a nasty disease if you are susceptible but then again so is all the other shit lying in wait to fuck you up.
    They all overreacted but now have made a comedy out of it.
    Don’t visit anyone.
    Go to work.
    Don’t go to a foreign country.
    Go to a restaurant.
    Wear a mask in Tesco.
    Don’t wear a mask at the pub.
    I could go on but CUNTS.

  17. I think in the beginning the cautious approach by the government was valid, as not as much was known abaaaaaht the virus.
    Fast forward to now and I estimate at least 10 million have had the cunt in blighty and abaaaaaht 40,000 have died.
    I’ll take my chances, I will not wear a mask and I’ve noticed no security in shops really ask me too either (probably because I am bigger than them).
    As for a vaccine they can go fuck themselves…not a chance. If they try and stop me flying somewhere, or restrict my travel due to not being ‘Covid Safe’ then I’ll slip aaaaht the country’s like the illegals slip in.
    Prepare for battle cunters, compulsory vaccinations coming our way in 2021…what a pile of cunt.

    • Compulsory vaccinations?
      Will they be as good as the “World beating test and trace system”? 🤣
      I want to see the politicians give these vaccinations to their Families first.
      Boris! Your comedy value has been priceless, but seriously now – fuck off.

      • What happened to the “Track” bit of the 3 T’s – I noticed that every political cunt from Boris to Jon Ashworth and Emily Thornberry quietly dropped “track” after June – perhaps it sounded too 1984 for them.

      • track and trace is a means to obtain everyone’s rna/dna – it never was a test for any ‘virus’ – clinically proved to be worthless (even the inventor of it said it was not, NOT a diagnostic tool – WHO use it anyway to increase the fear and control – DO NOT HAVE THE TEST

    • I really don’t fancy having a compulsory vaccine loaded with monkey or dog DNA. It’s repulsive though the cunts at Oxford University say it’s perfectly safe. Fuck off.

      Run for the hills or become a Gypsy.

      I might become a Jehovah Witness so that I can legitimately object.

      • 🎶
        God made man
        But he used the monkey to do it
        Apes in the plan
        We’re all here to prove it
        I can walk like an ape, talk like an ape, I can do what monkey do
        God made man
        But a monkey supplied the glue 🎶

      • Had to look that up RTC, I must have been about 9 when it came out. Whacky. Wearing Hazmat suits? How apt.

  18. It all started when men were kicked from schools and the feminnazi’s took over. Risk averse and ‘Woke’, now after 30+ years of this these poor children are now in central and local government with the indoctrination in full view for all to see.

    There was time when we worried about measles, whopping cough, smallpox, polio and all the other nasties out there but we just got on with life as did the kids in leg braises.

    You have to know where all this shit started, women always felt safe around poofs and since they kicked the real men out of the media the beat the poofs drum for them. Just look at the data, rise of feminism has fucked more than it has done good.

    It’s time to man up and push back at these woke weak cunts, it’s easier than you think, they have no spine and once you don’t fear them they have no power, fuck them all I say.

    • Very true SixF. Can’t believe how much we cave in to woke cunts that rule us and every institution these days.

  19. Interesting piece on summit news from the CDC. 6% apparently have only died in US due to Covid the rest had between 2.6 underlying health conditions which killed them.
    Can’t seem to post link

  20. I’m on the brink of being made redundant because of this over reacted too shitfest. The Swedish model should have been followed, to allow most of the economy to function. The company I work for are cunts and are using it as an excuse to cull numbers. Fourth time I’ve been made redundant in 5 years. What a great country we live in, so long as the illegal immo’s are ok. Fuck off Britain, you fucking suck.

    • Storm in a teacup.
      For the idle and paranoid.
      I dont wear a mask and not having a vaccination either.
      In fact never been vaccinated against anything!
      If I die its more likely to be measles or chickenpox than bat flu.

      • Sadly, Ian Dury missed out on the polio vaccine by 5 years. Thank Dog I was among the first children to benefit from it.

    • Agree, the Swedish way was fine because (this is just a guess) they were sensible about it, OK they had a lot of deaths but so did lots of other countries regardless of lockdown or not.

  21. With regard to medical “experts”, has anyone ever seen that weird fucker Chris Whitty blink? Could he possibly be one of these alien reptile creatures that supposedly control the world?

    Creepy cunt….

  22. I’ve noticed my local chippy is shutting an hour earlier than usual “because of Coronavirus”
    Well I’m sure that’s helped save countless lives.
    And meant I don’t get fish and chips for my dinner.

  23. I’ve had it. Found my 78 year old mum collapsed on the floor and my 85 year old dad stuck in his chair and unable to help her. Long story short; two ambulances came, took them both to hospital and the following day the ward rang me to tell me that they’ve both got covid-19. That was April the 1st and 2nd.

    Three days later I started feeling pretty ill and the hospital told me don’t even bother taking a test, the chances of it being anything other than covid-19 are very, very slim. You are almost certainly infected.

    I felt pretty grotty for 10 days, had most but not all of the symptoms and then I got better. Fortunately both my parents survived.

    In my view we have totally smashed our economy and our society for a disease that you have very little chance of catching and even less chance of dying from if you’re healthy. We should have concentrated our efforts on protecting the elderly and vulnerable. The rest of society frankly needs to man up.

    Unfortunately healthy people do sometimes die, I’m not being glib about, it my own wife died from a very rare form of leukaemia. She was 47. We had been married just 18 months when it came out of nowhere, 11 months later she was gone. Obviously I don’t like that, though I know I will see her again in Heaven I would rather she was here. I also recognise that sometimes people are unlucky and they die of a disease that they shouldn’t have contracted and it shouldn’t have killed them. Sadly it’s just the way it is. But can we really justify smashing our civil liberties, our mental health, our economy and our entire society in an attempt to be ridiculously risk-averse?

    “Congratulations healthy 35 year old man, you’ve avoided covid-19 which had very little chance of killing you….now you don’t have a job and can’t pay your mortgage or support your family.” Genius

  24. I won’t have a vaccination unless it’s compulsory. I haven’t had a flu jab and see this as no different. I’m not a tinfoil hat anti vaxxer, just don’t take stuff I don’t think I need. At my age I know enough pill popping wrecks, from diabetes, anxiety, anti depressants, and a few who are addicted to pain relief meds, although they would never admit it. For me, the cures appear worse than the fucking maladies half the time. Yes, there is undoubtedly afflictions that require medication for any form of normal existence, but half the shit these cunts take are because of diet and lifestyle choices, and to a certain extent self inflicted.
    As for anyone who thinks that vaccination should be compulsory, if you have the vaccine, you can’t catch it from me, so what’s the problem? If you want it, fine, if I don’t, it will be on my head, and woe betide any cunt who would say that could make me a burden on the fucking NHS. I’ve been paying for the service for nearly forty fucking years, and I’ve been to the doctor twice since 1983, once for eye drops, and another for a sprained back muscle, where I was told if it hurts, take some paracetamol (which I bought in Tesco, not the five quid a packet stuff the benefits skum get prescribed). I’m not junkie, a fat cunt or a piss head. Nor am I a gym bunny or a diet freak, I just get of my arse and do stuff. You can shove those silly masks up your hoop too.

  25. I carry a lucky snail shell instead of wearing a mask.
    I get asked how well it’s been working.
    I reply “about as effectively as that snotty rag you’re breathing into every day.”

  26. Thanks China. And this was the thanks we get for selling you 401 tonnes of gold back in 2003 for circa $270/Oz.

    Gordo Brown worked really hard to have to give that fucking gold away to you…

    We could have really used that extra £15bn for compensation for our abuse of cultural appropriation.

Comments are closed.