Rebooting Hollywoke

Hollyweird and it’s obsession with ‘rebooting’ movies, sometimes only a couple of years after the original came out, like Marvel did with Spiderman. I’m sick of them. They’re unoriginal, uninspired and lacking in any kind of entertainment value. That last one is because the “entertainment” industry is so woke that it’s incapable of creating ANYTHING without smacking us in the face with a sledgehammer of woke politics. You only have to look at Ghostbusters 2016 and the recent Charlies Angels and Terminator Dark Fate (which was intended to reboot the franchise with a female lead instead of John Connor, who they murdered early in the movie) to see what I mean. They were movies that nobody asked for, and nobody wanted. And when they inevitably failed, we got the usual chants of RAAACCCCIIISSSMMM and SSSSEEEEXXXXIIIISSSSMMMM. When in fact, it was because they were shite! They were badly written, badly produced, badly edited, badly acted and filled to the brim with woke agenda, at the expense of story and character development. Sometimes though, reboots can be good. Ronald D Moore’s Battlestar Galactica reboot was a good show. And it was written before wokeness infected Hollywood.

Now I hear that they’re doing a ‘reboot’ of Planes, Trains and Automobiles, which in my opinion, is one of the funniest, and saddest, movies ever made. John Candy and Steve Martin were brilliant in the movie. Now Will Smith and Kevin Hart are doing it. I have nothing against either of them, but they just aren’t right for the role. And I can’t help thinking that they were cast because of recent events.

The fact is, Hollywood are obsessed with doing reboots, because they have become lazy, and there is nobody in Hollywood who can create good, interesting, original content without loading it with far left politics. So fuck you Hollywood. Cunts. And fuck your cuntish reboots.

Nominated by: Quick Draw McGraw 

49 thoughts on “Rebooting Hollywoke

  1. I can’t wait for them to re-boot ’12 Years A Slave’ with a cracker in main main role.

    • *the main role
      Goddam word correction.

      Dawn Butler can play the slave-owner and Lammy the heavy-handed policeman married to a horse-whipped honky girl.
      Crowbar in that shit token black sarf London actor who was crowbarred into Star Wars as a Stormtrooper in the re-booted Star Wars.

  2. Hollywood derived from holy wood, they make magic there you know. Making children disappear, selling illusion as reality, implanting CGI into news footage.

    Of course Hollywood is woke with a few notable exceptions, a second term of Trump may well result in some famous people exposed, Chinese investment in Hollywood studios ended.

    The vast majority of Hollywood output is toxic in one way or another.

  3. Bloody love the original but won’t be parting with my hard-earned to watch this rebooted horse shite. Will enjoy hearing about it going down the toilet though.

    • I’d watch if it they were really brave, made it a “black(!)” comedy and forced Will Smith to play the role as a BLM activist gay rapist and Kevin Hart as a Trump-supporting anti-h0mo christian type.
      And there was no comedy. Just make the whole thing blacker than the 2 leads.

  4. I’m up for a reimagining of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.
    The dad will still be a dad but would have been born with a cervix.
    The girl will be white but is a lezza who only likes black girls.
    The boy will also be white and is treated as an outcast because he once spent Saurday afternoon playing headers and volleys down the park and foolishly told his mom/dad he enjoyed the competitiveness of the game. His cause is not helped when he also tells his mom/dad he found an old copy of Razzle under a bush and looking at pictures of naked women felt normal.
    Fucking hell I’m onto a winner here.
    Steven Spielberg watch out!

    • Munroe Bergdorf will play the Truly Scrumptious character. Her sweet factory will only produce vegan sweets.
      The Right Honourable Jeremy Corbyn will play the Lionel Jeffries/Grandad character. Though I’m not sure if JC will agree to the war games scene.

      • Lloyd Russell Moyle would be a shoo in for the child catcher. “Sweeties, lollipops, treacle tart, my gaping arsehole – all free today”.

  5. I can´t believe the outpouring of crap about this “Black Panther” actor who died. Diddy Lewis Hamilton “dedicated” the Belgian Grand Prix to him and Barack Obama paid tribute, the BBC and CNN devoted hours coverage with emotional contributions by people praising the Black Panther´s virtues. I had never even heard of the guy but appranbetly the world has just lost one of its greatest-ever inhabitants.

    • Methinks the “Black Panther” would have been better off using his superchiggun powers to find a cure for bowel cancer!
      Now sitting at the right hand of the Deity Nelson Mandela, next to Saint George.
      Saves sharing a cell with R Kelly and Joe Biden I suppose.

    • It surprised me that due to the outpouring and media coverage he had died of cancer sadly, and not been shot by the police. Not a clue who he was. It makes you wonder also if Hollywood is the world’s biggest money laundering operation.

  6. White films for white people!

    I don’t want to see anything where the cast is predominantly black, it’s not that I am racist (lol) but it doesn’t reflect my communadee.

    They had their chance with the planet of the apes series and they were shit!

    • I don’t mind if the cast isn’t token and the production uses talented, black actors and actresses who are there to authentically portray somebody from their culture and conveys black people in a positive, likeable way like that Gorillas In The Mist film.

  7. Never heard of Black Panther before yesterday’s grief jacking, I assume it’s some kind of Marxist, new world order, black supremacist production so would not be my bag, I’d like a reboot of Rootes, but all the slaves could be white and the masters would be black, I think this would definatly represent the “new woke era” we now live in, no wonder the western world is fucked, utter cunts!

    • Black Panther was apparently about a ‘technologically advanced’ African country. Like say Zimbabwe (I know, but it has gone backwards 200 years since it was called Rhodesia) or Mali or————-(insert name of technologically advanced primitive shithole)

  8. Smith and Hart are putting this remake together with Paramount.
    Director of the original, John Hughes was skilled at putting emotion in a film, a difficult act to follow….

  9. Way too many Marvel character type films for manchildren. Too many honky man bad/ dark key amazing and other woke shite too.

    TV series the same. Seems everything is superhero shite or woke bollocks.

    End result? Nobody really watches the shit and they lose money (although plenty of manchildren are into the Marvel shite). Idiots. Can you ever see the original Deathwish or Love thy neighbour ever being shown again on telly? Fuck off.

  10. I don’t like seeing too many tarry-toots in a film. I suspect that I may have been a trooper at Rorke’s Drift in a previous life.

    • Good afternoon Dick, I hope you realise you have let down the masses streaming this year’s cancelled Notting Hill Carnival online? We were hoping you hadn’t realised and made an appearance again in that banana eating gorilla outfit.
      Ainsley Harriot has a big pot boiling away, lots of jerk seasoning and herbs…and he keeps texting me asking where that fine Whitey Mr Fiddler is to add to the pot.
      I’ve had to stay indoors and listen to helicopter going round and round as a few of the ruffians remember seeing me with you last year before you discraced yourself by shouting out ‘Where my bitches at?’ and ‘Who teef me rice an pea?…must have been a dark key’, before you and the hounds were chased aaaaht the area and you escaped by swimming up the Thames.
      I hope you realise I cannot ever go to carnival again.
      😁

      • …but I was there,B+WC….here I am telling Police Commissioner Cressida Dick that I”ve heard that you have arranged an illegal rave….https://images.app.goo.gl/Y1h8yexnACmNPgMG9

        I,of course,recommended sending in the Special Patrol Group backed up by units from The Benefits Office. and Job Centre..that should put a stop to any more nonsense.

        Afternoon,B+WC.

  11. 14% of American population is Black. 87% of Movies in the last 5 years have black actors in major or starring roles. The most likely to appear on the floor of an awards ceremony……Blacks
    18% of cops in USA are Black ( excludes other minorities ) House Senate and Congress 14% Black ( excludes other minorities )
    58% of all murders in the USA are perpetrated by Blacks. 47% of all crime committed . Black. Wealthiest 100 contains 9 Blacks

    The list goes on…..over represented.

    • Im gutted.
      I love John Candy in the original.
      Will Smith will fuck it right up.
      He portrayed my hero Ali and was fuckin awful, ill never forgive the wingnut twat for that.
      He lets other blokes plough his missus you know?
      Doesnt even charge them!
      Hes a right knob head.
      Why his kids are mitmots.

  12. They can stick their shitfest films and indoctrination right up their coke addled arses.
    What a set of useless cunts.
    Bring back Michael Winner.

  13. Phonywood…Holywoke….it doesn’t matter what we call it. Liberal, disconnected celebretard cunts by any other name…

    One should not speak ill of the (recent) dead, so I’ll speak ill of the people glorifying the recently departed Chadwick Boseman.

    Mr. Boseman portrayed baseball great Jackie Robinson in a biopic, Nobody cared. He portrayed Prince T’Challa in the fictional tale The Black Panther. Everybody raved.

    So if you portray a genuine American hero, who was a civil rights pioneer in the real world, you get ignored. But if you portray a cartoon super hero, who was fictional despot from an imaginary walled of African Utopia you are celebrated. Bunch of fucking cunts.

    It is too bad he died young. Had he lived he could have portrayed St. George of Minneapolis and been made a deity.

    • Just seen on the BBC website ‘5 things you need to know about Chadwick Boseman’.

      Revealing with that this is agenda -driven and not a real news story.

      • 1) he dead
        2) his cars getting dusty
        3) he has 300 unanswered txt messages
        4) his toilet smells better
        5) he couldnt act

      • I suppose when someone like Pacino or De Niro kick the bucket, the BBC will give it a one paragraph mention somewhere deep within the bowels of their “entertainment” web page (2 paragraphs if it was found he supported BLM)

      • The silly thing is I bet when the news editors (here in Blighty) heard he’d died not knowing who he is or what he’d done (like the rest if us) looked through his resume and saw The Black Panther’ and not knowing it was a comic strip hero thought the black panthers were the sixties equivalent if BLM weren’t they…those with the black caps…they must have made a film about them…we have our headline.

      • Evening RT

        Well maybe…

        But the whole episode shows that The Agenda now is really reaching overkill. It was still the headline on BBC new when I went to bed last night. After being so most of the day. And yes still mentioned today.

  14. Anyone remember the classic TV cop show from the 70s, Starsky & Hutch? I loved that show as a kid. I have all the episodes on DVD too. Still great to watch.

    One thing about S&H though, it wasn’t funny. It wasn’t supposed to be and the cast did a great job at bringing grit and realism to the small screen, with a little 70s flare and panache.

    Fast forward to the early 2000s and Hollyweird gets hold of it and turns it into a goofy comedy starring (ahem) Ben Stiller (who ought to know better) and Owen ‘effeminate suicidal tendencies cunt’ Wilson (who would never ever know better because he’s crap in everything and is a rubbish actor).

    I gave up on Hollyweird’s output many, many years ago as I suspect many other cunts have too. So rare to see something original, well made, well acted, well scripted and just damned entertaining these days.

    • Owen wilsons nose looks like it was ripped off chewed for a bit, then reattached.
      He must have family high up because he couldnt act the goat the talentless twat.

    • With Captain Dobey in charge and you didn’t look at him and think he’s in charge ‘cos he’s black like you would nowadays. Huggy Bear? That ain’t my bag, Starsky.🤣

      • Yeah, you wouldn’t start an argument with Capt. Dobey would you?

        I’m sure the portrayal of Huggy in these ‘enlightened’ times would be considered waycist.

        Gotta love Hutch with that massive Colt Python revolver. Starsky was cool too, packing a full size 1911.

      • Listen to you Imitation Yank, A genuine firearms aficionado (as well as vintage TV critic). You’re becoming a bona fide Yank!

        😁

      • Shhhh General. I’m trying to blend in. Just can’t seem to get that accent down though. Y’all. 😉

  15. Kojak -black bloke reboot
    Dr.Doolittle – black bloke reboot
    Nutty Professor – black bloke reboot

    Just write our own films you lazy cunts.

  16. Some re-boots of classics are just utterly pointless wank. ‘Ghostbusters’ and ‘Magnificent Seven’ being just two examples.
    The Denzel Washington re-boot of the tv series ‘The Equaliser’ was pretty weak as well, with your boy going around kicking shit out of every baddy on the planet and hardly getting a scratch. I quite like Denzel as an actor, but no way could he ever replicate that simmering air of menace that Edward Woodward brought to the role.

    • I see you right about Edward Woodward, Ron.

      I should pick up The Equaliser DVDs. I used to enjoy the show when it was on telly way back when.

      I too like Denzel. A couple of my favourite filums of recent years starred ol’ Denzel. Inside Man and The Taking of Pelham 123. Good movies for action, suspense and with Inside Man, an air of ‘what the F is going on’. Recommended. Although Jodie Foster can do one. Lippy slag.

  17. What dopey cunts watch these films? They are still ranting on about the black actor who died, never heard of him.

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