New Carlsberg Advertisements.
Probably ( not ) the best lager in the world. Okay so I know that we banged on for years and years about how wonderful our lager was when it really, really wasn’t. But that’s alright because now we’re finally prepared to admit that it was actually rancid, mass produced piss water that probably wasn’t strong enough to even get my 12 year old daughter drunk. Tell me something that I didn’t already know.
So I know that we lied to you before, but now we’d like you to believe that our new product is fit for connoisseurs and not desperate tramps who hadn’t collected quite enough change to buy anything decent.
Well call me Mr. Cynical, but I for one won’t be spending my hard earned to find out. Brewed with that authentic Danish flavour. From a factory in Northampton.
Are Carlsberg UK worthy of a good old fashioned cunting?
Probably. Twats.
Nominated by: Cupid Stunt
Anyone remember “Harp stays sharp to the bottom of the glass”? Perhaps the Godfather of all pisswater.
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OMG yes! I remember that, Cupid. Makes me think of other telly beer ads of yesteryear:
Oranjeboom (“Oranjeboom Oranjeboom , it’s a larger not a tune”)
Skol (“It’s the taste which makes you do it”)
Hofmeister (“If you want great larger follow the bear”)
Anyone remember Watney’s Party Seven ads?
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‘i was drinking something poofy,
and the girl she looked straight through me.
So I had a pint of Hawk,
and now she’s gonna screw me.’
Stay witty and sexist to the bottom of the glass.
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And the Foreign Legion with the soldier singing ‘I wish I was in Greenhall Whitley Land’
And that weird Carling Black Label Western advert that lwent on for a bit.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Toek6CdldC8
And I loved the dancing roadworks sign on the Heineken advert.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TblWE9a-Ie0
2
Further to the comments that a local beer is best drunk locally… that much derided blue can with the red F, yes when manufactured in a British chemical plant is scarcely a reflection of the original.
Fosters lager was introduced in 1887, cold-brewed and served cold through iced pipes (as opposed to the room temperature habit). The cold drink was apparently popular with Melbourne labourers on (for instance) a 37 degree day after a hard days as bricklayer, briquette carrying, dunnycan humping, wharfing, and all to wash away the dust and stink of a horse cart transport industry.
Of course in its day fosters was a local small brewery, and 133 years later when manufactured in a distillation plant only the brand remains of the original, probably the fate of many famous beers (and look out any micro brew products on the verge of moving to the big leagues!)
https://cub.com.au/
5
Why would you want a ghoul who cant act to sell your beer?
2
Real ale for me everyday over fizzy piss lagers.
Often get a delivery from Fullers, ESB, 1845, Bengal Lancer and London Porter are great. The special beers, Past Masters Pale Ale (8%), Imperial Porter (10%) and Imperial Stout (10.7%) are fantastic. Only need one or two mind you.
3
What’s the difference between a lager and a clitoris?
A clitoris only tastes of piss for the first couple of seconds.
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