Ms Captain Birdshite

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Well its happened again to the surprise of no one. Another day another company bends over backwards to crawl back up its own arsehole in the name of diversity. Birds Eye the frozen brand has replaced the familiar image of the jolly seaman, Captain Birdseye, mainstay of over 50 years on its packaging, with a woman.

Apparently this is just a temporary measure to promote a new line of fish fingers but seems to me another symptom of replacing white men in advertising to bolster companies woke credentials. What’s next, ‘Milk Tray Non-Binary Person’?

On the plus side at least it wasn’t a Somali pirate. Fuck off Birds Eye.

https://www.somersetlive.co.uk/news/local-news/new-captain-birdseye-woman-gloucestershire-4311718

Nominated by: Liberal Liquidator 

Cod preserve us. They’re skating on thin ice. Is no plaice sacred any more?-  admin

84 thoughts on “Ms Captain Birdshite”

  1. Jokes aside this really pisses me off.

    I’ve eaten birdseye food since I was a lad and it is a trusted brand. They still do the best (proper cod) fish fingers.

    This sort of #ustoo virtue-signalling diversity is sickening. What next? A transgenda skipper with a pink beard?

  2. Let me guess. The adverts will now feature ‘Big Momma Birds Eye’ and dem ol’ fish fingers will now be made of fried chiggun.

    Lordy fuckin hallelujah, bruddass.

  3. Here’s one for you all:

    Captain Jap-eye with Master Bates & Seaman Stains (OK those last two were taken from Captain Pugwash)

  4. If it was Hayley Atwell or Christina Hendricks in a tight outfit and a saucy pirate’s hat I would be in favour. But I know it will be some unattractive and titless woke minger and I dare say they will pick a tuppence flicker and all.

    • Luckily captainess Birdseye will be able to cycle and play tennis on board due to her new brand of Draculas teabags for wimminz! 😄👍
      Only time you should be on a ship is when you’re invading, unnatural things they are! (Except for my vessel The Black Pig!).

  6. Dont believe a word about it! Captain birdseye a woman? Smells fishy to me, maybe she can get together with nicola sturgeon and rub out some eggs , maybe it’s on pornhub, two lezzas eating fish eggs, anyone want to bring some blinis?

  7. “Twas on the good ship Venus, by Christ you should have seen us. The figurehead was a whore in bed and the mast a mammoth penis…”

  8. I’m sick of this revisionist bullshit replacing blokes with birds If gender is a construct as the left make out I cant wait to see women competing against men in proper physical sports like boxing rugby or even football my local irish league seconds team would beat the women’s pro teams ffs

    And birdseye can go and fuck themselves it’s like coronal saunders being replaced with some oprah Winfrey lookalike another product il never buy again

  9. So they’ve got rid of Hugh boat? Obviously been on plenty of fish (or is that stinks if fish?) to find this old trout.

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